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| First Writing Class - Grammar; If you wish to enroll, reply here | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Oct 24 2008, 07:27 PM (1,203 Views) | |
| Kyizen | Oct 24 2008, 07:27 PM Post #1 |
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This particular thread shall be open, even though the site isn't fully up yet. One of the most important parts in writing is grammar, and my belief is that if you don't have proper grammar, your story, however descriptive, is not at its best. If you want to join, post here. I'll start when I've got at least three willing members. |
| Strength - Abingdon Boys School | |
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| Cloud | Oct 26 2008, 12:29 PM Post #2 |
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i'm in you keep saying i need to work on my grammer :P
Edited by Cloud, Oct 26 2008, 12:30 PM.
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| Ryutobi | Nov 2 2008, 06:06 PM Post #3 |
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geuss ill jion too |
~Ryutobi~![]() | |
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| Kyizen | Nov 2 2008, 09:04 PM Post #4 |
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Ok, if there's not another member enrolling in this in three days, I'll just start it. B) |
| Strength - Abingdon Boys School | |
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| Nikon | Nov 2 2008, 09:54 PM Post #5 |
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I guess I'll join :D |
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| Kyizen | Nov 4 2008, 06:39 PM Post #6 |
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Ok, I'll be starting this, then. If anyone else wants to join, just post here saying so. First off: I'll give you a written paragraph, try and spot at least 5 mistakes. Correct then in bold.
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| Strength - Abingdon Boys School | |
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| Nikon | Nov 4 2008, 09:00 PM Post #7 |
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Alright here goes the corrections.
It should be "but the words swam in front of my eyes blinding them."
It should be "I shook my head trying to clear it, but to no avail it just kept torturing me. Finally I shouted "Enough!" and strangely it stopped. Edited by Nikon, Nov 4 2008, 09:01 PM.
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| Kyizen | Nov 4 2008, 09:50 PM Post #8 |
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Just saying, I'll tell people whether they're right or not when the other two post. But I'll say this: there's at least five. |
| Strength - Abingdon Boys School | |
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| Ryutobi | Nov 5 2008, 09:42 PM Post #9 |
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corrections: As I stared carefully at the writing and wondered what was going on. It seemed to be fine but the words swam in front of my eyes blinding them. I shook my head trying to clear it, but to no avail it just kept torturing me. Finally I shouted, "enough!", and strangely it stopped. i think thats it |
~Ryutobi~![]() | |
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| Cloud | Nov 6 2008, 04:27 PM Post #10 |
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But the words Swam in front of my eyes blinding them. I shook my head (no comma) trying to clear it but to no avail, (insert comma) it just kept torturing me |
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| Kyizen | Nov 6 2008, 05:28 PM Post #11 |
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Ok, let's go over this now. The mistaken version was:
The correct version is:
So, a total of six mistakes. Tallying up . . . Apollo (2/6) (change your name :P ) - You had two right; the 'swam' and the capital 'E' in enough. You took out commas that should have been present. Mikeymo101 (2/6) - You had two right; the 'swam' and the comma before the 'Enough!' Same as Apollo, you took out commas that should have been there. MGK (1/6) - You had one right; the 'swam.' You took out the comma where it was needed, and didn't correct the speech part. ________________________________________________________ Next up, do a short RP (100 words +) about anything, doesn't matter. Don't forget, no matter what point of view you choose, stick to it. I'll correct them, and then in that post, say when to use what kind of commas. |
| Strength - Abingdon Boys School | |
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| Nikon | Nov 7 2008, 11:11 PM Post #12 |
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The dark corridor was lit up by two torches that hung on either side of the walls. An oval wooden door laid at the far end of the corridor where the faint glow from the torches reflected the worn down wood. Winston felt reluctant and decided to turn back but realized he had come too far to turn back now. I can do this. he thought as he tightened his fist, feeling sweaty and nervous all of a sudden. No matter how hard he tried to take the first step forward his legs just wouldn't budge. Finally after taking in a couple of breaths, Winston decided it was time to see what was behind that mysterious door he had thought of for so long. Little did he know was that whatever was behind that door would surely change his life forever. Edited by Nikon, Nov 7 2008, 11:12 PM.
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| Ryutobi | Nov 22 2008, 04:27 PM Post #13 |
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“My parents are going to kill me!” I said to my friends Lauren and George after I read my report card for the 1st quarter of school. “Come on it can’t be tha-…” Lauren starts but reads it and says, “Oh my God, George look at this.” “Dude, I’d hate to b u rite now.” George told me after he looked over my report card. “Like I said, my parents are going to kill me. ARGH I knew I should have just stayed home and studied, instead of going to all o’ those parties!” *HONK* “Damn my mom’s here, guess ill never see you guys again I’ll miss you guys. Lauren I want you to have all of my books and science stuff. George I want you to have all my video games, toys and 5% of the money in my bank account.” I told my friends before I left forever. “Stop being so dramatic, you idiot” Lauren shouted after me “and I want your video games!” Edited by Ryutobi, Nov 22 2008, 04:28 PM.
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~Ryutobi~![]() | |
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| PrevAnthony1 | Nov 26 2008, 02:47 AM Post #14 |
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might as well join in now instead of never "Holy shit!" He ran as quickly as his legs could carry him, leaves crunching under his feet as he tried to escape the flock of birds flying after him. A sudden slip of his feet caused him to go tumbling off the old dirt road and down into a ditch that seemed more like a dried up river. he got up slowly, making sure nothing was severely bruised. after stretching his back and making sure the sound of frantic wings was almost gone he began his climb back up to the path. "Damn dude, all i wanted was an egg or two for an omelet." He sighed and walked in the opposite direction he had heard the flapping wings go. "Maybe i could get some honey..." |
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| Kyizen | Nov 27 2008, 01:12 AM Post #15 |
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Nikon:
should be:
Minute mistakes. Period instead of a comma, worn out instead of worn down, and no 'surely' because that implies that he does know, not he doesn't know. Overall, 8.5/10 __________________________________________________________ Ryutobi:
should be:
Not bad, a couple of grammar mistakes, but you really need to watch out for the AIM talk, lol. Overall, 6.5/10 ___________________________________________________________ Anthony:
should be:
Pretty good, just watch out for 'i' instead of 'I' and capitals at the beginning of every sentence. Overall, 8.5/10 ~~~~~---~~~~---~~~~~---~~~~---~~~~~---~~~~~~---- So, for all of your first quests, I'll post here the mistakes you've done, and since you all did this thing, an extra +2 TC to all of you! Add it in your Status Updates. |
| Strength - Abingdon Boys School | |
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