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| Let The World Spin Madly On; Portia | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Jan 21 2011, 12:01:11 AM (348 Views) | |
| Elliott Fix | Jan 21 2011, 12:01:11 AM Post #1 |
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*Kara; s:c | w:p
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Thursday, January 21st, 2038. 11:00 pm. Elliott's client dinner had gone extremely well. Unfortunately, this also meant that it had gone quite late and that he was now past the brink of inebriation. He had told Portia he would come over after the dinner. He hadn't expected it to go this late, but he didn't want to go back on his word, either. So he'd taken a cab because he didn't trust himself to apparate just then and was now standing in front of Portia's front door. His left hand was in the pocked of his black wool overcoat and his right was out in front of his face, wrist up. He was staring at his watch. He knew Portia would still be awake. She never went to bed early. But he was having a hard time deciding if still coming over was a good idea. They hadn't been able to spend a lot of time together lately. He hated the idea of continuing to not see her, so he knocked on the door, then put his hand in his pocket. He rocked back and forth from his toes to his heels, not because he was too impatient, but because it was fun. The earth was moving just a little bit extra tonight. It felt good. |
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| Portia Wardwell | Jan 21 2011, 04:30:06 AM Post #2 |
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Kelci; s:t | w:d
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At eight, Portia had still been waiting, scantily clad, for Elliott. In bed, no less. She figured he would appreciate the gesture regardless of how his evening had gone. If the dinner went well, it would be a celebration. If the dinner went badly, he would, obviously, need some cheering up. And, after all, she had been away so much lately that even when the two woke up in the same bed, it was unlikely that they'd actually fallen asleep there together. They both deserved it. By nine, she got tired of waiting. The made-for-TV movie selection was weak that evening and she didn't really want to be working when Elliott got home. But by nine-thirty, she gave up, pulled on one of Elliott's oxfords, and moved back downstairs to the couch, where she'd left her briefcase. She hadn't moved since when she heard the knock, and she didn't move for a few seconds after she heard it, either. She looked up, pushed her glasses to the top of her head, and raised an eyebrow at Fish, who was too worn out from their run to budge, "What do you think, should I let him in?" The dog gave her knee a shove with his nose, offering a singular bark in response. "He's lucky you like him better than me." Portia stood up and went to the door. She held the shirt closed and pulled open the door, grabbing his scarf and promptly tugging him inside. She kissed him soundly before she even pulled back enough to look up at him properly. "I missed you." It was true. But more truthfully, she was a little bit annoyed that he hadn't even called, but Portia Wardwell liked things just-so; she had had a plan and, by God, she was going to go through with it. Edited by Portia Wardwell, Jan 21 2011, 04:35:24 AM.
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| Elliott Fix | Jan 21 2011, 05:04:12 AM Post #3 |
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*Kara; s:c | w:p
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Elliott's eyes widened at the sight of Portia. He could get used to looking at this. Apparently this was not the time to get used to it, though, and he stumbled inside as she tugged him in by his scarf before either of them had even said 'hello'. She was kissing him before his feet stopped moving and pulling away before his brain had even been able to switch gears and kiss her back. He suddenly felt more drunk than he remembered being. Probably a combination of moving too quickly and that last drink starting to catch up with him. She said that she missed him and he gave her a goofy smile (in his defense, he wasn't going for goofy. Almost never did he try for goofy smiles. A regular, happy smile, was his intent. But in his current state it was almost impossible to guarantee one of those). "Me too," he told her, then backtracked. "I mean, not that I also missed me. That I missed you. But not anymore 'cause we're both here now." Oh God, he was doing that thing where he could not shut up. His eyes widened slightly at his self-realization, and, still talking, he changed the subject. "Weren't we just kissing? I think I'd like to go back to that." He took his hands out of his pockets and put them on her waist and leaned in. "You look fatabulistic, by the way," he said, still not shutting up, just before his lips met hers. |
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| Portia Wardwell | Jan 21 2011, 05:33:19 PM Post #4 |
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Kelci; s:t | w:d
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She laughed at his attempted compliment, pulling away from the kiss again, "Elliott Fix, are you drunk?" she scolded in mock admonishment. Then, remedying her question, "Too drunk to take me upstairs?" His scarf was still wrapped around her hands and she used it to bring him closer. She looked up at him and smirked, letting the shirt slip off her shoulder a bit, "Because you've kept me waiting an awfully long time." There was something she found particularly endearing about Elliott when he had been drinking. Maybe it was that he always seemed so happy. Whatever it was, she had had enough of waiting. |
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| Elliott Fix | Jan 21 2011, 06:03:59 PM Post #5 |
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*Kara; s:c | w:p
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He tipped forward and rested his forehead against her bare shoulder. "Sorry, sorry. The dinner went even better than better. He didn't just hire us for his company's merger; he decided-ed to use our services exclusivesly." He apologized for being later than he meant to be, then turned his face and quickly kissed her neck. He couldn't stay like that, though. It made him much too dizzy. He ducked out from under his scarf and stood up straight again. He held on to her shoulders to keep from toppling over from moving much too quickly. He grinned stupidly and shook his head in response to her question about being drunk. "I'm not drunk." He realized what a horrible lie it was the moment it left his mouth and he nodded his head instead. "Well...quite possibly a bit. Maybe. Yes. Yes, definitely. When James Hollingsworth orders wine for the whole table, you do not refuse. Not even the fifth time he does it." He told her as seriously as he was able. He let go of her shoulders and took off his coat. He couldn't remember where to put it, but the back of the couch seemed like a good idea; it was close by. "It's either really hot in here or really cold out there or maybe both." He took off his blazer, too, and unbuttoned his vest. He started to undo his tie, but seemed to be having issues. "I think I'm stuck." |
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| Portia Wardwell | Jan 24 2011, 05:29:32 AM Post #6 |
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Kelci; s:t | w:d
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Yes, it was hot in her flat. Mainly because she was wearing next to nothing, a fact that he was apparently not interested in at the moment. Still, it was hard to be mad when he was so helpless. She pressed her lips gently to his forehead and helped him with his tie, "That's fantastic, Bruce. Really." She draped his tie around her neck for the time being and untucked his shirt, unbuttoning it deftly. And she really was very happy for him, not that that was very obvious at the moment. Running her hands up under his undershirt, she kissed his neck softly, "But we can talk about it later, can't we?" Selfish? Maybe. |
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| Elliott Fix | Jan 24 2011, 06:26:38 AM Post #7 |
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*Kara; s:c | w:p
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Ugh, why was he so drunk? Okay, scratch that thought. He knew why. He just really wished that he wasn't. Portia initiating anything more physical than a kiss was so rare that he really, truly, would have just liked to take her up to bed and not care about anything else. Sadly, his male anatomy did not run particularly well under the influence of large quantities alcohol. Or, you know, at all. Even more sad was the realization that Portia probably didn't know about this unfortunate side effect of alcohol. He sighed as she kissed his neck and he considered his options. This was hard to do, because his brain was operating at a reduced capacity. He could explain to her exactly why sex was not going to be happening tonight, and then she could die of awkwardness. Elliott's ability to feel awkward, or to feel anything, was greatly compromised, so telling her didn't seem like a half-bad idea. But then part of his brain reasoned that she might send him home if she felt too embarrassed. He did not want to leave. Which left his other option: stalling. "Yes, later," he agreed as he tugged her arms out from under his shirt and then kissed her temple. "Now it is the time for coffee. Black. Loads of it." He stepped away from her and trotted off towards the kitchen as if he were completely oblivious to her advances. Which, given his current state, was not unbelievable. And, had she not been as persistent as she was being, would have actually been true. |
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| Portia Wardwell | Jan 24 2011, 11:40:25 PM Post #8 |
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Kelci; s:t | w:d
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She blinked in disbelief when he pulled her hands away; he wasn't usually one to refuse. She sat down on the arm of the couch and watched him walk away, wondering what was wrong with her. She felt a little ridiculous and she hated it. Fish nudged his head between her arm and the back of the couch, whining softly. Portia gave him a good scratch behind the ears and sighed, "I don't know what his problem is, either, Fish." And since when did she talk to her dog this often? Obviously she was going crazy. She stood up and went to the kitchen, pulling herself up onto the counter. She handed him a mug and toyed with a button on her shirt, "Fix ... I mean ... did I do something wrong?" |
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| Elliott Fix | Jan 25 2011, 12:03:27 AM Post #9 |
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*Kara; s:c | w:p
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He smiled toothily at her as he accepted her offered mug. He stared at it and thought hard about whether or not he should just magic it full of coffee. He didn't want to wait, but he also didn't want it to come out bad because he was drunk. He decided to just go with it. Bad coffee was still coffee. But before he could start, Portia spoke. His grin fell off his face and an expression of confusion replaced it. He set the mug on the counter and looked at her. "What're you talking about? What could you have possibly done wrong in the five minutes'ince I've walked through the door?" He tilted his head to the right and thought aloud. "What'd I do that made you think you did something wrong? Are you upset that I've been drinking?" He blinked his eyes hard and then looked back at her. "Would you just, please, tell me what I did or what you think you did and then we can not do it again." |
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| Portia Wardwell | Jan 25 2011, 03:53:18 AM Post #10 |
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Kelci; s:t | w:d
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She gently took his wand from him, "Here, let me." He was better at charms than she was, at least on a good day. But she didn't even want to see what would happen if he tried to make coffee in his current state. Stirring the absent contents of the mug a few times, she lifted the wand and muttered the spell, sending a stream of coffee -maybe too dark- into the mug. She set it back on the counter and shrugged, tapping her bare knee mindlessly with his wand, "I guess maybe a little upset, but not that you were drinking, just that you're too drunk to stay focused on me for more than a few seconds." It sounded selfish, so she remedied her accusation, "I mean ... it's ok, you didn't know you were coming home to this. I just wanted to do something for you, for once, and you don't seem that happy about it." |
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| Elliott Fix | Jan 25 2011, 04:29:28 AM Post #11 |
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*Kara; s:c | w:p
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He gave her a lopsided grin. "It'snot you. It's me." He realized what he said and rolled his eyes. This was a bad idea. He shook his head in an attempt to recover. That was an even worse idea. He put his hands on Portia's knees and leaned his head on her shoulder. This was a much better idea. "I mean I can't say focused on anything more than a few seconds." He sighed and stood up straight, but kept his hands on her knees. "And I am happy," he smiled. "It'sa very nice thought. I just....I'm so throughly pissed. I'm sorry. Just do me a favor and try and hold on to that feeling until morning." He nodded at her encouragingly, then let go of her knees and picked up his coffee mug. |
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| Portia Wardwell | Jan 25 2011, 05:03:48 AM Post #12 |
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Kelci; s:t | w:d
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She sighed softly and slid off the counter, "Yeah, ok. That's ... ok." Not ok at all. She was not really convinced by his explanation. She knew she was being at least somewhat crazy, but, as usual, she was able to rationalize her self-worth issues. Portia went back to the couch, buttoning the shirt up on the way; it wasn't very long, but she felt stupid about being half-naked now. Sitting down cross-legged in the corner of the couch, she wrapped herself in a multicoloured blanket, put her glassed back on, and started back in on the brief she'd been writing when Elliott came home. "Do you need anything else? I'm going to be up for a while." |
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| Elliott Fix | Jan 25 2011, 05:49:21 AM Post #13 |
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*Kara; s:c | w:p
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He took a drink from his coffee and watched her leave. Even in his current state, he could tell that she didn't mean it. He didn't know how he felt about that. He supposed he should feel badly, but he didn't. He just felt dizzy. He took another drink and followed after her. Elliott stopped in front of her and she asked, oh so casually, if he needed anything else. She hadn't gotten what she wanted, so she was just going to go back to doing exactly what she'd been doing before he'd arrived. He knew how he felt now. He shook his head. Ugh, he needed to remember to stop doing that or he was going to fall over. What he needed was Slughorn's Sober-Up Solution, but he knew she didn't have any, so the point was moot. He took another drink from his coffee, then set it down on the coffee table and sat down on the couch facing Portia. He rested his cheek against the back of the couch and stared at her. "I need you to tell me what you want. Whatever you want, I'll do it; I don't care." Edited by Elliott Fix, Jan 25 2011, 05:50:26 AM.
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| Portia Wardwell | Jan 25 2011, 02:45:29 PM Post #14 |
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Kelci; s:t | w:d
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She looked up, still holding her quill, and tucked her hair behind her ear, "What? Elliott, it's fine, forget it." She leaned forward and kissed his forehead softly, then sat back and flashed him a quick smile before looking back down at the brief. "Really love, all I want is for you to just concentrate on not waking up with a hangover." |
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| Elliott Fix | Jan 25 2011, 05:32:10 PM Post #15 |
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*Kara; s:c | w:p
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Elliott groaned, clearly annoyed. "Fine, I'm forgetting it." He half rolled, half stood up from the couch. He managed to only stagger half a step before he was standing solidly, and which point he picked up his coffee mug and took a long drink. He scowled. "You can just keep working and forget about me and I'll go home and forget about you and then neither of us will have to worry about making the other person feel bad." The words were out of his mouth before he could even stop them. He decided he didn't care. He walked around to the back of the couch, setting his mug down on the end table along the way, and picked up his blazer to put it back on. But he couldn't put it back on. He was too drunk and too frustrated and suddenly he felt everything at once and he couldn't handle it; he threw the jacket to the ground and just gave up. "God, why am I such a f*ck up?!" It didn't matter that everything else in his life was going swimmingly. He couldn't get his relationship with Portia to work right and losing his basic motor skills on top of that apparently was enough to push him over the edge. |
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| Portia Wardwell | Jan 25 2011, 08:53:16 PM Post #16 |
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Kelci; s:t | w:d
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That got her attention. She set down her papers slowly and stood up, crossing her arms over her stomach. She bit her bottom lip nervously, "Don't say things like that, Elliott. Please." Any suggestion that their relationship was falling apart, no matter how subtle, no matter how drunk he was when he made it, scared her. She didn't want to forget about him and she was pretty sure the feeling was mutual; he was wasted, that was all. She dropped the blanket and went to the other side of the couch, picking up his blazer and holding it against her torso. "And you aren't a f*ck up. Don't leave. We'll go to bed, you'll feel better in the morning." |
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| Elliott Fix | Jan 25 2011, 10:05:41 PM Post #17 |
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*Kara; s:c | w:p
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"No I won't. I can't. Can't you...can't you see what's happening? You're just doing what I want and giving up again." It had always been clear to him, but he'd just ignored it. But he lost his ability to be subtle or filter himself when he went over his limit. He briefly pressed his palms into his eyes and sighed. He let his hands drop and crossed his arms. "I can't keep doing this to you. You're half the girl you were when I first asked you out. I mean, God, I used to jokingly ask you to marry me and you would laugh (and it was beautiful) but I can't even mention it anymore without damaging your psyche. You used to be happy and confident and now you're just miserable all the time and it's my fault. I kept convincing you to do things you didn't want to do because I wanted them and it was easy and that's just f*cked it all up. "Now you won't even tell me what you want; maybe half the time you don't know anymore. But the other half the time I'm sure you know I'll just convince you to want something else anyway. Something else that won't make you happy; like having kids or spending time with my muggle friends. Making up a fake muggle backstory so life is easier for me. Well f*ck that. I am done trying to make you want things that make you so bloody miserable. It's not worth it. It's making us both unhappy. We're just wretched shells of the people we used to be before we got together." His words were strong and clear, not anything like how he'd sounded moments ago. There were no misspoken, slurred words. He said it and he meant it and he felt awful but he still felt like it was the truth. |
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| Portia Wardwell | Jan 26 2011, 05:40:41 AM Post #18 |
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Kelci; s:t | w:d
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If he wanted the old Portia, fine. He could have her. She reacted without so much as a silent second of shock, no delay of any kind. Hurling his blazer back at him, she pressed the heel of her hand to the spot where the bridge of her nose met her forehead. Her actions were semi-contradictory: an outright burst of anger and a selfish attempt to stave off the imminent pain. But her next words, in spite of the softness of her tone, were icy and left no confusion about what she was feeling. "Get out." She had already played the pathetic damsel in distress once before with him, the tragically dumped. It wasn't going to happen again. There were two things Portia hated more than anything. The first was being patronized because of her social standing. The second was being told what she wanted. Her entire life had been a series of decisions other people either made for her or at least strongly influenced. And she had always, always despised it. So it had been particularly maddening to her to find out that the things she had thought she wanted were slowly being replaced by the things Elliott was making her want. Not 'make' in any forceful sense, but because in exchange for a life with him, she was finding herself more than content to be ... normal. She dropped her hand to her side, her voice trembling slightly as the volume rose, "No, f**k you Elliott. f**k you for even assuming you have the power to make me do anything, let alone something that makes me unhappy and f**k you for thinking I would evergive up anything for you." By the end of the sentence, she was nearly shouting. "And do you know what? f**k you for ever caring about me and for making me love you in the first place and f**k you for being too bloody thick to realize that all your talk about marriage was damaging because it was always in jest and I was starting to think that that was all the idea of marrying me would ever be to you: a joke. And that I was too scared to admit that I was sick of working for the Ministry and how exhausted it makes me, and that I was ready to at least contemplate the idea of settling down, and for waiting so long to do this when you've apparently been feeling it for a long time. But most of all, f**k you for doing this now, something this important, when you're piss drunk." Portia didn't feel even a speck of remorse for the outburst. She didn't feel much of anything but pure, unadulterated rage at the moment. Something in her had snapped and she was suddenly, at least for the moment, the girl who had grown up without a mother, who had had to learn to forget any emotion she couldn't handle. But anger had an outlet, and right now, that outlet was doing everything she could to make Elliott Fix feel like the class-act jerk he really was. "So get the bloody hell out of my flat," she finished, furiously unlooping the tie from around her neck and thrusting it into his hands, followed shortly by his shirt -the one she had been wearing- which she tore off immediately afterwards. She stood there with her hands on her hips, for once completely unembarrassed by her lack of clothing, "I'm done. I'm so completely done with you. You make me sick. And I hate that no one else seems to see you for the bastard you are." Her eyes were hard; there wasn't even an ounce of compassion left in her. None at all. He had hurt her beyond comprehension, had taken so much from her ... but being abandoned was nothing she hadn't dealt with before. |
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| Elliott Fix | Jan 26 2011, 06:36:59 AM Post #19 |
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*Kara; s:c | w:p
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He let her words flow into him with a sick sort of satisfaction. He agreed completely. It was a very strange feeling. He caught everything she threw at him without even thinking about it. Without even flinching. He felt like he deserved this and he was revelling in it. "You're perfectly right," he told her evenly. "I'm sorry I didn't realize it sooner." He didn't want to apologize for hurting her or for anything else. He was sorry, but he didn't want her forgiveness, and he was sure she didn't want to hear it anyway. It was too little too late, and honestly, she was right; he was still much to drunk to be doing this right now. He was a bastard and a jerk and an idiot and everything in between. Then he left, but not because she asked him to. It was sickening to think that, even now, he was still doing exactly what he wanted to do. |
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| Portia Wardwell | Jan 26 2011, 07:12:36 PM Post #20 |
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Kelci; s:t | w:d
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She sank onto the bottom step, still shaking with anger. But inside she felt nothing, felt hollow. Fish came out from behind the chair where he had been cowering during the shouting, his nails clicking on the hardwood. He licked her foot and rested his chin on her knees, looking up at her as if to say and now what will you do? "Alright, oh Wisest of Little Dogs," she quoted, "Are you ready for an adventure?" |
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2:47 PM Jul 11