| Welcome to The Pit Lane. We hope you enjoy your visit. You're currently viewing our forum as a guest. This means you are limited to certain areas of the board and there are some features you can't use. If you join our community, you'll be able to access member-only sections, and use many member-only features such as customizing your profile, sending personal messages, and voting in polls. Registration is simple, fast, and completely free. Join our community! If you're already a member please log in to your account to access all of our features: |
| Barrichello Wins!!! | |
|---|---|
| Tweet Topic Started: Jun 12 2011, 02:02 PM (281 Views) | |
| Pasta | Jun 12 2011, 02:02 PM Post #1 |
|
Chief Engineer
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
|
In an astonishing Canadian grand prix, Rubens Barrichello was the surprise winner standing on the top step of the podium. Despite starting way down the grid Barrichello benefited by good tyre strategy and lucky safety car deployments. Oddly he was aided by his very old nemesis, Michael Schumacher who chose to shun his Mercedes Petronus vehicle in favor of a souped up wheel chair. The wheel chair, run entirely on a quiet electrical motor, apparently annoyed the hell out of Bernie Ecclestone who continually complained “I can’t hear – there is no sound!!” Schumacher drove that wheel chair much wider than it really was, and caused a number of accidents, resulting in multiple yellow flags and safety car periods. Lewis Hamilton was given a drive through penalty for passing the wheelchair in a hospital zone. His Mclaren team argued against the penalty on the basis that he should exempt because he is emotionally handicapped, and a hospital zone includes, by Canadian law, a handicapped zone. The stewards are still debating this and are expected to come out with a timely decision in 2011. Even though Ferrari were way out of the points, Alonso said he was happy because this showed that Barrichello was a much better number 2 than Massa, though he added he really didn’t give a sh!t one way or the other and would continue to focus on himself. Barrichello’s win was a bonanza for new Williams team sponsor facial tissue brand Kleenex. Global brand marketing manager Abe Sorbant said “Williams was a natural team for us to sponsor. Every time Rubens is photographed or interviewed he is crying. Real tears, facial expressions - everything. Today we really kicked Facial Royal @ss. 300 million TV viewers were watching Rubens sobbing on stage. On top of that his nose got plugged and he was sniffling heavily. With just a few tissues we absorbed it all!” Apparently Kleenex tissue was passed around to the entire emotional Williams team as part of the cash strapped team’s employee medical benefits plan. Pole sitter Sebastion Vettel could finish no better than fifth after a slow start and his inability to ever pass anyone safely. Nevertheless his fifth place finish was considered an excellent result for RBR’s new sponsor “Safety First Rubber, Inc.” a European supplier of rubber surgical gloves and sexual aids. “We consider Seb an ideal driver to sponsor” said Finn Gerrup Urs, the Finnish/Swedish (whatever) brand manager. Whatever his position, he gets press. Today was very important as we could show the world that our products actually have space for all five units on the hand, and not just one unit. Unfortunately today after the start, Seb had not much else to do but rotate on his thumb. Even then it was good for us because afterwards he could still shake hands with everyone and nobody was offended, which shows the sanitary attributes of our products.” All in all an exceptional Canadian grand prix!! |
![]() |
|
| P1 | Jun 15 2011, 08:17 PM Post #2 |
|
Chief Engineer
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
|
Wish I could have seen the live footage of that GP. Especially the FIA technical scrutineering part, where I understand that Rosberg was in for an inspection of his rear diffuser? |
![]() |
|
| Lord Tau | Jun 15 2011, 09:33 PM Post #3 |
![]()
|
What is this I don't even... |
![]() |
|
| Pasta | Jun 16 2011, 07:35 AM Post #4 |
|
Chief Engineer
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
|
Odd you should mention that. All the babes ignored the podium finishers and flocked after the lovely Nico, apparently completely unaware he is gay!!! |
![]() |
|
| Pasta | Jun 16 2011, 07:47 AM Post #5 |
|
Chief Engineer
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
|
And I suddenly realized the real reason for the upcoming ban on rear diffusers. |
![]() |
|
| « Previous Topic · Formula 1 · Next Topic » |





![]](http://z6.ifrm.com/static/1/pip_r.png)





1:04 AM Jul 11