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| Breakfast Cereal for Nihilists | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: May 23 2017, 07:46 AM (158 Views) | |
| Catseye3 | May 23 2017, 07:46 AM Post #1 |
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Fulla-Carp
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On an impulse, I just bought, brought home, and ate a bowlful of General Mills' Fiber One cereal. My God, what a putrid experience. Sh!t-brown bacillus-shaped rods stuffed with dust, promising to be crispy and sogging instantly in milk, this is a foodstuff that could be choked back only by people too deeply mired in hopeless abjection and melancholy to conceive of savor. As for taste? Ha! I laugh! You've heard of happy breakfast cereal slogans. "Snap! Crackle! Pop!" "Breakfast of Champions." "Magically Delicious!" "I'm cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs!" This one? "All hope abandon ye who enter here." That's $2.44 I'll never get back. |
| "I shall now begin to speak of purple, which exceeds all the colors that have so far been mentioned both in costliness and in the superiority of its delightful effect." -- Vitruvius, De architectura, 1st century BC. | |
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| Mikhailoh | May 23 2017, 08:13 AM Post #2 |
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If you want trouble, find yourself a redhead
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Abhorrent, indeed. Self flagellation in a box. Bag that crap, and accept no substitutes for Reese's Puffs. Fantastic with banana or blueberries. |
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Once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead - Lucille Ball | |
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| John D'Oh | May 23 2017, 08:46 AM Post #3 |
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MAMIL
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You have to mix the Fiber One with other stuff - it bulks up all the sugary crap so you can eat tons without going into a coma. |
| What do you mean "we", have you got a mouse in your pocket? | |
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| Mikhailoh | May 23 2017, 08:48 AM Post #4 |
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If you want trouble, find yourself a redhead
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Blasphemy. |
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Once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead - Lucille Ball | |
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| John D'Oh | May 23 2017, 09:41 AM Post #5 |
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MAMIL
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I must admit I prefer bacon and eggs - at least twice a week. |
| What do you mean "we", have you got a mouse in your pocket? | |
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| Catseye3 | May 23 2017, 12:15 PM Post #6 |
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Fulla-Carp
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I believe you. I think though, despite Mik's advice, this ends my brief venture into the world of breakfast cereals. I was in the mood for something different, something with ice-cold milk; I think this bane is headed for the compost, and I'll just hope it doesn't kill any innocent microorganisms. |
| "I shall now begin to speak of purple, which exceeds all the colors that have so far been mentioned both in costliness and in the superiority of its delightful effect." -- Vitruvius, De architectura, 1st century BC. | |
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| Jolly | May 23 2017, 12:36 PM Post #7 |
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Geaux Tigers!
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I'm a traditionalist when it comes to cold cereals...corn flakes, cheerios, shredded wheat and the Chex cereals... |
| The main obstacle to a stable and just world order is the United States.- George Soros | |
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| jon-nyc | May 23 2017, 02:36 PM Post #8 |
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Cheers
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I like my cereal like I like my internet forums - with plenty of nuts, fruits, and flakes. |
| In my defense, I was left unsupervised. | |
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| Jolly | May 23 2017, 02:38 PM Post #9 |
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Geaux Tigers!
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Ah, WTF.... |
| The main obstacle to a stable and just world order is the United States.- George Soros | |
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| taiwan_girl | May 24 2017, 06:42 AM Post #10 |
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Fulla-Carp
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A friend told me that Lucky Charms cereal is going to have a limited edition Lucky Charms that will be a box of nothing but the marshmellows.
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| bachophile | May 24 2017, 06:48 AM Post #11 |
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HOLY CARP!!!
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and if you are not into tight glucose control....try this![]() |
| "I don't know much about classical music. For years I thought the Goldberg Variations were something Mr. and Mrs. Goldberg did on their wedding night." Woody Allen | |
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