Welcome Guest [Log In] [Register]
Welcome to The New Coffee Room. We hope you enjoy your visit.


You're currently viewing our forum as a guest. This means you are limited to certain areas of the board and there are some features you can't use. If you join our community, you'll be able to access member-only sections, and use many member-only features such as customizing your profile, sending personal messages, and voting in polls. Registration is simple, fast, and completely free.


Join our community!


If you're already a member please log in to your account to access all of our features:

Username:   Password:
Add Reply
Breakfast Cereal for Nihilists
Topic Started: May 23 2017, 07:46 AM (158 Views)
Catseye3
Member Avatar
Fulla-Carp
On an impulse, I just bought, brought home, and ate a bowlful of General Mills' Fiber One cereal. My God, what a putrid experience.

Sh!t-brown bacillus-shaped rods stuffed with dust, promising to be crispy and sogging instantly in milk, this is a foodstuff that could be choked back only by people too deeply mired in hopeless abjection and melancholy to conceive of savor.

As for taste? Ha! I laugh! :puke:

You've heard of happy breakfast cereal slogans. "Snap! Crackle! Pop!" "Breakfast of Champions." "Magically Delicious!" "I'm cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs!"

This one? "All hope abandon ye who enter here."

That's $2.44 I'll never get back. :angry:
"I shall now begin to speak of purple, which exceeds all the colors that have so far been mentioned both in costliness and in the superiority of its delightful effect." -- Vitruvius, De architectura, 1st century BC.
Online Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Mikhailoh
Member Avatar
If you want trouble, find yourself a redhead
Abhorrent, indeed. Self flagellation in a box.

Bag that crap, and accept no substitutes for Reese's Puffs. Fantastic with banana or blueberries.
Once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead - Lucille Ball
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
John D'Oh
Member Avatar
MAMIL
You have to mix the Fiber One with other stuff - it bulks up all the sugary crap so you can eat tons without going into a coma.
What do you mean "we", have you got a mouse in your pocket?
Online Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Mikhailoh
Member Avatar
If you want trouble, find yourself a redhead
Blasphemy.
Once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead - Lucille Ball
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
John D'Oh
Member Avatar
MAMIL
I must admit I prefer bacon and eggs - at least twice a week.
What do you mean "we", have you got a mouse in your pocket?
Online Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Catseye3
Member Avatar
Fulla-Carp
John D'Oh
May 23 2017, 08:46 AM
You have to mix the Fiber One with other stuff - it bulks up all the sugary crap so you can eat tons without going into a coma.

I believe you. I think though, despite Mik's advice, this ends my brief venture into the world of breakfast cereals. I was in the mood for something different, something with ice-cold milk; I think this bane is headed for the compost, and I'll just hope it doesn't kill any innocent microorganisms.
"I shall now begin to speak of purple, which exceeds all the colors that have so far been mentioned both in costliness and in the superiority of its delightful effect." -- Vitruvius, De architectura, 1st century BC.
Online Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Jolly
Member Avatar
Geaux Tigers!
I'm a traditionalist when it comes to cold cereals...corn flakes, cheerios, shredded wheat and the Chex cereals...
The main obstacle to a stable and just world order is the United States.- George Soros
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
jon-nyc
Member Avatar
Cheers
I like my cereal like I like my internet forums - with plenty of nuts, fruits, and flakes.
In my defense, I was left unsupervised.
Online Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Jolly
Member Avatar
Geaux Tigers!
jon-nyc
May 23 2017, 02:36 PM
I like my cereal like I like my internet forums - with plenty of nuts, fruits, and flakes.
Ah, WTF....
The main obstacle to a stable and just world order is the United States.- George Soros
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
taiwan_girl
Member Avatar
Fulla-Carp
A friend told me that Lucky Charms cereal is going to have a limited edition Lucky Charms that will be a box of nothing but the marshmellows.

:D
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
bachophile
Member Avatar
HOLY CARP!!!
and if you are not into tight glucose control....try this

Posted Image

"I don't know much about classical music. For years I thought the Goldberg Variations were something Mr. and Mrs. Goldberg did on their wedding night." Woody Allen
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
« Previous Topic · The New Coffee Room · Next Topic »
Add Reply