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A Change in Government?
Topic Started: Oct 30 2016, 09:37 AM (175 Views)
George K
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Finally
An offer from Her Majesty.

LONDON (The Borowitz Report)—In an unexpected televised address on Saturday, Queen Elizabeth II offered to restore British rule over the United States of America.

Addressing the American people from her office in Buckingham Palace, the Queen said that she was making the offer “in recognition of the desperate situation you now find yourselves in.”

“This two-hundred-and-forty-year experiment in self-rule began with the best of intentions, but I think we can all agree that it didn’t end well,” she said.

The Queen urged Americans to write in her name on Election Day, after which the transition to British rule could begin “with a minimum of bother.”

Elizabeth acknowledged that, in the wake of Brexit, Americans might justifiably be alarmed about being governed by the British parliamentary system, but she reassured them, “Parliament would play no role in this deal. This would be an old-school monarchy. Just me, and then, assuming you’d rather not have Charles, we could go straight to William and those children of his who have mesmerized you so.”

Using the closing moments of her speech to tout her credentials, the Queen made it clear that she has never used e-mail and has only had sex with one person “very occasionally.”



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"Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... "
- Mik, 6/14/08


Nothing is as effective as homeopathy.

I'd rather listen to an hour of Abba than an hour of The Beatles.
- Klaus, 4/29/18
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Mikhailoh
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If you want trouble, find yourself a redhead
Oh yeah. Boris would be a YUGE improvement.
Once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead - Lucille Ball
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Aqua Letifer
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ZOOOOOM!
Lizzie would get my vote long ahead of Hillary or ol' Don.
I cite irreconcilable differences.
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John D'Oh
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MAMIL
The fact that people apparently don't remember that this story is trotted out every 4 years tells you everything you need to know about the American political "system".
What do you mean "we", have you got a mouse in your pocket?
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Larry
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Mmmmmmm, pie!
"Hello, possums!"



Of the Pokatwat Tribe

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George K
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Finally
John D'Oh
Oct 30 2016, 01:56 PM
The fact that people apparently don't remember that this story is trotted out every 4 years tells you everything you need to know about the American political "system".
I knew that. The only addition, if I've got it right, was the reference to Brexit.
A guide to GKSR: Click

"Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... "
- Mik, 6/14/08


Nothing is as effective as homeopathy.

I'd rather listen to an hour of Abba than an hour of The Beatles.
- Klaus, 4/29/18
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John D'Oh
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MAMIL
George K
Oct 30 2016, 02:18 PM
John D'Oh
Oct 30 2016, 01:56 PM
The fact that people apparently don't remember that this story is trotted out every 4 years tells you everything you need to know about the American political "system".
I knew that. The only addition, if I've got it right, was the reference to Brexit.
It's really Andy Borowitz I was complaining talking about.
What do you mean "we", have you got a mouse in your pocket?
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