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| Leek Joke | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: May 30 2011, 12:28 PM (4,152 Views) | |
| George K | May 30 2011, 12:28 PM Post #1 |
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Finally
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Q. What vegetable do plumbers like? A. Leeks =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= A man goes to the doctor with a leek sticking out of one ear and a potato out of the other ear. He asks the doctor what's wrong. The doctor thinks a lot then tells him "Well, for one thing, you're not eating correctly". =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= An old lady asked her female friend how she was getting on. The friend replied "Not so good, Ted died last night. I asked him to dig up a leek for me so that I could make Leek and Potato soup. He went into the garden, had a massive heart attack and died instantly" "Oh you poor thing" replied the old lady. "What did you do?" "I opened a can of peas instead." =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= There was a man from Leek Who instead of a nose had a beak. It grew quite absurd, till he looked like a bird He migrates at the end of next week. |
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A guide to GKSR: Click "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08 Nothing is as effective as homeopathy. I'd rather listen to an hour of Abba than an hour of The Beatles. - Klaus, 4/29/18 | |
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| Luke's Dad | May 30 2011, 12:30 PM Post #2 |
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Emperor Pengin
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You rapscallion, you. |
| The problem with having an open mind is that people keep trying to put things in it. | |
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| Mikhailoh | May 30 2011, 01:02 PM Post #3 |
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If you want trouble, find yourself a redhead
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On this Memorial Day: Who was in charge of Confederate vegetables? . . . . . . . . wait for it.... . . . . . Robert E. Leek |
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Once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead - Lucille Ball | |
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| George K | May 30 2011, 01:03 PM Post #4 |
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Finally
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I had no idea that this would turn into a pun thread. But when you guys piped in, I was sure-man. |
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A guide to GKSR: Click "Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... " - Mik, 6/14/08 Nothing is as effective as homeopathy. I'd rather listen to an hour of Abba than an hour of The Beatles. - Klaus, 4/29/18 | |
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| Larry | May 30 2011, 01:23 PM Post #5 |
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Mmmmmmm, pie!
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There once was a leek from Nantucket... that had a big leak in its bucket... It hung down its head, then suddenly said.... WTF - I'M A F*CKING LEEK! I DON'T HAVE A BUCKET!! I COULDN'T CARRY A DAMNED BUCKET EVEN IF I HAD ONE BECAUSE I DON'T HAVE ANY ARMS!! AND HOW DID I EVEN SAY THIS???? I'M A F*CKING LEEK!! I CAN'T TALK!!! |
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Of the Pokatwat Tribe | |
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| Mikhailoh | May 30 2011, 01:26 PM Post #6 |
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If you want trouble, find yourself a redhead
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Reminds me of the old one: 'What would you say if someone gave you a talking dog?'. 'HOLY SH!T!!!! A TALKING DOG!!!' |
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Once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead - Lucille Ball | |
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| Larry | May 30 2011, 01:35 PM Post #7 |
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Mmmmmmm, pie!
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A guy was driving down a country road when his car broke down. He got out, raised the hood, and started looking around to see if he could see anything that might explain why the car stopped running. Suddenly he hears someone say "It's the generator". He looks up, but doesn't see anyone. He looks all around him, but the only thing he could see was a horse standing next to the fence in the field beside him. He sticks his head under the hood again, and hears "It's the generator." He jumps up again, looks all around, but there's no one there but the horse. So he looks at the horse and says "Did you say something?" The horse said "Yes - it's the generator." This scared the crap out of the man, and he took off running down the road just as fast as he could run. Before long he meets a farmer driving a tractor down the road. The farmer stops and says "Hold on there feller, what's the rush?" The guy is afraid the farmer will think he's crazy, but he tells him what happened anyway. The farmer says "Was it a white horse?" The man: "Yes!" Farmer: "With a gray mane and tail?" Man: "Yes!" Farmer: "Did he have a large black spot between his eyes?" Man "YES! THAT'S THE ONE!!!!" The farmer says "Well... don't pay any attention to him. He don't know a damned thing about cars....." |
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Of the Pokatwat Tribe | |
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| apple | May 30 2011, 04:09 PM Post #8 |
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one of the angels
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great joke thread - no puns today from me
Edited by apple, May 30 2011, 04:10 PM.
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| it behooves me to behold | |
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11:27 AM Jul 11