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I just beat the sh!t out of my piano.
Topic Started: Dec 2 2009, 06:12 PM (1,256 Views)
Mark
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HOLY CARP!!!
I am so angry I think I am going to explode.

No, the situation has not been rectified.

I'm "playing it cool" waiting for an apology. I was playing Chopin's 15th Prelude and I just snapped. I hope I didn't hurt anything. I'm afraid to go look.

I don't think the apology is ever going to arrive. :sad:
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When I see an adult on a bicycle, I do not despair for the future of the human race. H.G. Wells
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plays88keys
Pisa-Carp
Wow, Mark. I hope your beautiful instrument is ok, but more importantly I hope YOU are ok. I must have missed something, so I have to ask: what happened?
You can never get enough of what you don't need to make you happy.
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kenny
HOLY CARP!!!
I missed it too.
What's up?
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Mikhailoh
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If you want trouble, find yourself a redhead
I'm pretty sure Chopin is not going to apologize. If by chance he does, the piano is the least of your worries.
Once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead - Lucille Ball
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Mark
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HOLY CARP!!!
Oh nothing. Just one of the most important people in the universe, one that I helped bring into this world, one whom I would die for, one that I have spent the past 5+ years trying to get over a very serious medical condition, told me to go get fvcked. Like in "FVCK YOU!".

I have never been this upset. I was horribly grief stricken when my father died but that was different than this. This is one of the most horrific feelings I have ever experienced.
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o 0
When I see an adult on a bicycle, I do not despair for the future of the human race. H.G. Wells
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sue
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HOLY CARP!!!
Oh Mark, I'm so sorry. I can just barely imagine the ache. :hug: :hug:
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Mikhailoh
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If you want trouble, find yourself a redhead
That's awful, Mark. And just horrendously painful. Please try to remember that she's the child, no matter how old, and you are the adult. A parent has to hold themself to the standard they expect of the child. It's terribly difficult and absolutely necessary.

Once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead - Lucille Ball
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Mark
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HOLY CARP!!!
I'm waiting Mik. That's all.

In the meantime, my drums have taken most of the anger. Tonight the piano suffered. That's not right. I should have gotten up and went downstairs to the drum set instead. They are meant to be beaten, not my poor piano.
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When I see an adult on a bicycle, I do not despair for the future of the human race. H.G. Wells
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Larry
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Mmmmmmm, pie!
Mark, people say things all the time that they do not mean. The utterance of a couple of hurtful words do NOT erase the years of love and devotion shared.

Calm down, and wait. What was there before still there, underneath the emotions - on the other person's part just as much as on yours.

Of the Pokatwat Tribe

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Big John
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Senior Carp
one of these days I'll fill you in on what's unfolding in my personal life. I would have probably benefitted from being in a padded cell a few weeks ago but as it is there are fewer collectible pieces of "Fiesta Ware" in the world now.

Just maintain and take whatever it is out on the piano. Those can be repaired. If you are pissed about a child (which is what it sounds like) be aware that this might be 10% what's going on now and 90% something getting triggered from the past.





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Mikhailoh
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If you want trouble, find yourself a redhead
Please, please don't corner yourself by waiting for an apology. It may never come, and it just reflects where she is, not how she feels about you.

I feel so much for you right now. There is no one on earth that can hurt you like your children, and you just can't hit back. That's the vulnerability of it. Larry is right. This doesn't - must not - change anything.
Once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead - Lucille Ball
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John Galt
Fulla-Carp
Mark, I'm new here so I hope I'm not intruding.

Is there any chance there is something going on in your child's life that is making him/her lash out at you? That has nothing to do with you per se? We often seem to take out our frustrations on those we are closest to.

Maybe after you've had a chance to take a deep breath, would re-reading some of the discussion in the Anger thread help? There was a lot of good advice there.

In any event, at least you have a soft place to land here.
Let us begin anew, remembering on both sides that civility is not a sign of weakness.
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Free Rider
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Fulla-Carp
Mark
Dec 2 2009, 06:22 PM
Oh nothing. Just one of the most important people in the universe, one that I helped bring into this world, one whom I would die for, one that I have spent the past 5+ years trying to get over a very serious medical condition, told me to go get fvcked. Like in "FVCK YOU!".

I have never been this upset. I was horribly grief stricken when my father died but that was different than this. This is one of the most horrific feelings I have ever experienced.
Mark I'm sorry to hear this. Just so you know I told both of my parents to fvck off and said I hated them. I regretted that move for a long time but I do not think I ever apologized...but maybe around the age of 23 or 24 I realized just what a complete tool I was when I was an adolescent.

I think just about everyone I know lashed out at their parents when they hit 16 or 17...it's an environment (the home) where teens are most comfortable acting out.

I'm not trying to make excuses for your kid's behavior..just trying to keep you looking at the big picture instead of a small blip in a long life. Try to remember that nobody should hold a grudge against angry adolescents. That's the same as a 2 year old having a temper tantrum except now they can swear and slam doors. Inside they are still so obviously struggling to control themselves.

Let the dust settle and open the door for an apology by apologizing yourself...even if it's something like "I sorry I did ________. I still want you to know that I love you" Make sure you pick the right time when everyone is relaxed...probably in the morning. I find most folks are much more reasonable when they've had some rest. Chances are if you are speaking in a calm, non-confrontational manner your child will reciprocate.

My kid is only 2 but I do not really know how I would react when/if this happens to me. Good luck, man. :hug:

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Mark
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HOLY CARP!!!
Ever have it happen Mik? Have you ever stayed up 5 days straight to make sure that person you love more than life itself doesn't harm themselves? Have you spent every last dime you had in savings and then going into debt for more than your first house cost trying to fix something that nobody can apparently fix? Only to have your heart ripped out of your chest with the utterance of two words?
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When I see an adult on a bicycle, I do not despair for the future of the human race. H.G. Wells
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sue
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HOLY CARP!!!
Mikhailoh
Dec 2 2009, 06:40 PM
Please, please don't corner yourself by waiting for an apology.

I hesitate to give advice to someone who is hurting as bad as you are, Mark, but Mik is so right about this.
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Mark
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HOLY CARP!!!
I already did that FR. I apologized and I got no response. No good mornings, no hellos, no goodnights.

Nothing.
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o 0
When I see an adult on a bicycle, I do not despair for the future of the human race. H.G. Wells
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Big John
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Senior Carp
sometimes what you're hearing is a reflection or a "get some help". You've seemed angry a lot lately. No amount of good deeds excuse being pissed off a lot and not trying to figure out why beyond the superficial reasons like politics, taxes, government or current events. Those are all window dressings. Always are, always have been, always will be.





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Big John
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Senior Carp
what age are we talking about here?





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kenny
HOLY CARP!!!
Kids say crap.
It doesn't mean anything.
They're kids.

Take the long view.
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Mark
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HOLY CARP!!!
Oh I will Kenny. You good people are one of my vents. :D

16 years old John.
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When I see an adult on a bicycle, I do not despair for the future of the human race. H.G. Wells
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Phlebas
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Bull-Carp
Mark, a lot of people gave good advice. Be angry, take it out on the piano or drums. She's still your daughter, and you're the adult.
I hope you have someone you can talk to about this.
Best of luck.
Random FML: Today, I was fired by my boss in front of my coworkers. It would have been nice if I could have left the building before they started celebrating. FML

The founding of the bulk of the world's nation states post 1914 is based on self-defined nationalisms. The bulk of those national movements involve territory that was ethnically mixed. The foundation of many of those nation states involved population movements in the aftermath. When the only one that is repeatedly held up as unjust and unjustifiable is the Zionist project, the term anti-semitism may very well be appropriate. - P*D


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kenny
HOLY CARP!!!
Mark you have a most delicate music desk. Posted Image Do you still? :leaving:
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Mark
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HOLY CARP!!!
I will be fine. We will be fine. It will take some time. But it will all be fine. Right now It's not. But it will be.
___.___
(_]===*
o 0
When I see an adult on a bicycle, I do not despair for the future of the human race. H.G. Wells
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Mark
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HOLY CARP!!!
kenny
Dec 2 2009, 07:01 PM
Mark you have a most delicate music desk. Posted Image Do you still? :leaving:
:lol: Oh yes! I just pounded the keys about as hard I could.

And I am no lightweight.

The music desk in still intact.
___.___
(_]===*
o 0
When I see an adult on a bicycle, I do not despair for the future of the human race. H.G. Wells
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kenny
HOLY CARP!!!
There is music written for what you feel.
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