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Children's books you'll never see
Topic Started: Apr 24 2009, 06:26 AM (539 Views)
Phlebas
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Bull-Carp
I'm sure this has been posted at some point:


CHILDREN'S BOOKS YOU WILL NEVER SEE:


"Strangers Have the Best Candy"


"The Little Sissy Who Snitched"


"Some Kittens Can Fly!"


"Kathy Was So Bad Her Mom Stopped Loving Her"


"The Attention Deficit Disorder Association's Book of Wild
Animals of North Amer-Hey! Let's Go Ride Our Bikes!"


"You Are Different and That's Bad"


"Dad's New Wife - Robert"


"POP! Goes the Hamster...and Other Great Microwave Games"


"Curious George and the High Voltage Fence"


"The Boy Who Died From Eating All His Vegetables"


"The Pop-Up Book of Human Anatomy"


"How to Become the Dominant Military Power in Your Elementary School"


"Controlling the Playground: Respect Through Fear"


"When Mommy and Daddy Don't Know the Answer, They Say God Did It"


"Daddy Drinks Because You Cry"
Random FML: Today, I was fired by my boss in front of my coworkers. It would have been nice if I could have left the building before they started celebrating. FML

The founding of the bulk of the world's nation states post 1914 is based on self-defined nationalisms. The bulk of those national movements involve territory that was ethnically mixed. The foundation of many of those nation states involved population movements in the aftermath. When the only one that is repeatedly held up as unjust and unjustifiable is the Zionist project, the term anti-semitism may very well be appropriate. - P*D


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Luke's Dad
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Emperor Pengin
What do you mean by "never see"?

I just bought these two for Luke last week:

Quote:
 
"How to Become the Dominant Military Power in Your Elementary School"


"Controlling the Playground: Respect Through Fear"


Quote:
 
POP! Goes the Hamster...and Other Great Microwave Games"

:lol2:

Reminds me of:


Quote:
 
How to Screw With Your Roommate:

Keep a hamster as a pet. Buy a blender, and make milkshakes every day. Then, one day, get rid of the hamster. Make a shake using a lot of ketchup. When your roommate comes in, look at the shake, look at the empty hamster cage,say,"I was curious."

The problem with having an open mind is that people keep trying to put things in it.
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Jeff
Senior Carp
Too funny! I think I have seen more of these - Fun With Lightsockets And Powertools and things like that. :)
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Frank_W
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Resident Misanthrope
"Curious George & The Scorpion Petting Zoo"
Anatomy Prof: "The human body has about 20 sq. meters of skin."
Me: "Man, that's a lot of lampshades!"
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Phlebas
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Bull-Carp
Frank_W
Apr 24 2009, 06:41 AM
"Curious George & The Scorpion Petting Zoo"
:lol2:

I think ther'e a whole series.

- Curious George and the Acetylene Torch.

- Curious George and the Abandoned Refrigerator.

- Curious George and the Third Rail.

-Bi-Curious George
Random FML: Today, I was fired by my boss in front of my coworkers. It would have been nice if I could have left the building before they started celebrating. FML

The founding of the bulk of the world's nation states post 1914 is based on self-defined nationalisms. The bulk of those national movements involve territory that was ethnically mixed. The foundation of many of those nation states involved population movements in the aftermath. When the only one that is repeatedly held up as unjust and unjustifiable is the Zionist project, the term anti-semitism may very well be appropriate. - P*D


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Luke's Dad
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Emperor Pengin
Edit, Phlebas beat me to it.
The problem with having an open mind is that people keep trying to put things in it.
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Frank_W
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Resident Misanthrope
:lol2:
Anatomy Prof: "The human body has about 20 sq. meters of skin."
Me: "Man, that's a lot of lampshades!"
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jon-nyc
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Cheers
"Things rich kids have that you'll never have"

"Why can't Mr. Fork and Mr. Electrical Outlet be Friends?"
In my defense, I was left unsupervised.
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ivorythumper
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I am so adjective that I verb nouns!
"My First Book of Methamphetamine Production"
The dogma lives loudly within me.
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Luke's Dad
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Emperor Pengin
The Diary of Barney Frank
The problem with having an open mind is that people keep trying to put things in it.
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George K
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Finally
Luke's Dad
Apr 25 2009, 02:57 AM
The Diary of Barney Frank
My computer is damn lucky I haven't had my coffee yet.
A guide to GKSR: Click

"Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... "
- Mik, 6/14/08


Nothing is as effective as homeopathy.

I'd rather listen to an hour of Abba than an hour of The Beatles.
- Klaus, 4/29/18
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Phlebas
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Bull-Carp
Luke's Dad
Apr 25 2009, 02:57 AM
The Diary of Barney Frank
Now that's funny.
Random FML: Today, I was fired by my boss in front of my coworkers. It would have been nice if I could have left the building before they started celebrating. FML

The founding of the bulk of the world's nation states post 1914 is based on self-defined nationalisms. The bulk of those national movements involve territory that was ethnically mixed. The foundation of many of those nation states involved population movements in the aftermath. When the only one that is repeatedly held up as unjust and unjustifiable is the Zionist project, the term anti-semitism may very well be appropriate. - P*D


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Improviso
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HOLY CARP!!!
Posted Image
Identifying narcissists isn't difficult. Just look for the person who is constantly fishing for compliments
and admiration while breaking down over even the slightest bit of criticism.

We have the freedom to choose our actions, but we do not get to choose our consequences.
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Luke's Dad
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Emperor Pengin
Optimus Prime get's prostate cancer.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RYe1Xou6gCA
The problem with having an open mind is that people keep trying to put things in it.
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Frank_W
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Resident Misanthrope
"How To Dress Sexy For Grandpa"
Anatomy Prof: "The human body has about 20 sq. meters of skin."
Me: "Man, that's a lot of lampshades!"
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ivorythumper
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I am so adjective that I verb nouns!
"Adventures on Uncle Mike's Lap"
The dogma lives loudly within me.
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VPG
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Pisa-Carp
Starting a drug gang in Catholic School.
I'M NOT YELLING.........I'M ITALIAN...........THAT'S HOW WE TALK!


"People say that we're in a time when there are no heroes, they just don't know where to look."
Ronald Reagan, Inaugural, 1971

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Larry
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Mmmmmmm, pie!
Quote:
 
"Kathy Was So Bad Her Mom Stopped Loving Her"



They wrote a book about it?.....
Of the Pokatwat Tribe

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Copper
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Shortstop

"The BB-Gun Repair book - How To Put An Eye Back In"
The Confederate soldier was peculiar in that he was ever ready to fight, but never ready to submit to the routine duty and discipline of the camp or the march. The soldiers were determined to be soldiers after their own notions, and do their duty, for the love of it, as they thought best. Carlton McCarthy
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Frank_W
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Resident Misanthrope
:lol2:
Anatomy Prof: "The human body has about 20 sq. meters of skin."
Me: "Man, that's a lot of lampshades!"
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George K
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Finally
"Come to the Bakery With Me and Share Some Pie."
A guide to GKSR: Click

"Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... "
- Mik, 6/14/08


Nothing is as effective as homeopathy.

I'd rather listen to an hour of Abba than an hour of The Beatles.
- Klaus, 4/29/18
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