Welcome Guest [Log In] [Register]
Welcome to The New Coffee Room. We hope you enjoy your visit.


You're currently viewing our forum as a guest. This means you are limited to certain areas of the board and there are some features you can't use. If you join our community, you'll be able to access member-only sections, and use many member-only features such as customizing your profile, sending personal messages, and voting in polls. Registration is simple, fast, and completely free.


Join our community!


If you're already a member please log in to your account to access all of our features:

Username:   Password:
Add Reply
  • Pages:
  • 1
Does Having Kids Make You Unhappy?
Topic Started: Apr 1 2009, 02:50 PM (566 Views)
QuirtEvans
Member Avatar
I Owe It All To John D'Oh
http://parenting.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/04/01/why-does-anyone-have-children/?hp
It would be unwise to underestimate what large groups of ill-informed people acting together can achieve. -- John D'Oh, January 14, 2010.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
George K
Member Avatar
Finally
Going into my "Things to read between cases" file. Thanks Quirt.
A guide to GKSR: Click

"Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... "
- Mik, 6/14/08


Nothing is as effective as homeopathy.

I'd rather listen to an hour of Abba than an hour of The Beatles.
- Klaus, 4/29/18
Online Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Frank_W
Member Avatar
Resident Misanthrope
There are times when being a father makes me the happiest man on Earth. There are other times when I think, Man... If I would have known back then, I would have got a vasectomy before the Missus ever got pregnant.

It's a mixed bag. Kids can cause you such depths of grief, heartbreak, money, frustration, worry, and anxiety. Other times, they can bring so much joy, love, pride, and sweetness.

Looking back on it now, with my daughter having now turned 11, I'm glad. I've loved and continue to love being a father. :) Wouldn't trade it for anything. :)
Anatomy Prof: "The human body has about 20 sq. meters of skin."
Me: "Man, that's a lot of lampshades!"
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Mikhailoh
Member Avatar
If you want trouble, find yourself a redhead
Best experience of my entire life. Everything else is stupid.
Once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead - Lucille Ball
Online Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Improviso
Member Avatar
HOLY CARP!!!
Fruit of the Loins. Bittersweet. :sombrero:
Identifying narcissists isn't difficult. Just look for the person who is constantly fishing for compliments
and admiration while breaking down over even the slightest bit of criticism.

We have the freedom to choose our actions, but we do not get to choose our consequences.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Pianolicious
Senior Carp
I didn't mind it. I am glad I did. It got me out of myself a bit.
Sit tibi vita longa et omnia bona!!! -- Dr. Spock
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Copper
Member Avatar
Shortstop

Not me.

After 20 years I have found no down side, none at all.
The Confederate soldier was peculiar in that he was ever ready to fight, but never ready to submit to the routine duty and discipline of the camp or the march. The soldiers were determined to be soldiers after their own notions, and do their duty, for the love of it, as they thought best. Carlton McCarthy
Online Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
kenny
HOLY CARP!!!
I know a couple people who resent being a parent.

So sad.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
John D'Oh
Member Avatar
MAMIL
For me, being a parent was a great introduction to what's really important in life. Everything else pretty much pales into insignificance.
What do you mean "we", have you got a mouse in your pocket?
Online Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
dolmansaxlil
Member Avatar
HOLY CARP!!!
I have to echo Frank. I love being a parent. But there are times when I think, "It's a good thing he's so cute..."

I wouldn't change it for the world, though. There really isn't anything like it. I'm not one of those people who believes that ones life can't possibly be complete without children - but I also know that mine is better because of my little guy.
"Your first 10,000 photographs are your worst." ~ Henri Cartier-Bresson

My Flickr Photostream


Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Horace
Member Avatar
HOLY CARP!!!
Seems pretty clear to me that people are wired to find fulfillment in parenthood. There will also be a skew towards pro-parenthood opinion due to social pressure, but with what a PITA it is to be a parent from a logistical perspective, and with how selfish people are, we'd have died out as a species long ago if there wasn't something very powerful drawing us to it.

The findings of that study (and according to the report, all other studies) are interesting though.

We have to realize that people who regret parenthood will not be prone to admit it, usually not to themselves and almost never to others. Anecdotal evidence is near useless because of that.

The amount of emotional pull we feel towards having children was calibrated long ago when life was brutish and short. Now life is cushy and long, and children conflict with our selfishness more than ever before. That's why reproduction rates fall to below replenishment levels as wealth increases - the emotional scales tip in the wrong direction eventually.



As a good person, I implore you to do as I, a good person, do. Be good. Do NOT be bad. If you see bad, end bad. End it in yourself, and end it in others. By any means necessary, the good must conquer the bad. Good people know this. Do you know this? Are you good?
Online Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Kincaid
Member Avatar
HOLY CARP!!!
Well put, Horace. Having kids kind of "expands" the bandwidth. I don't find much joy in sacrifice and delayed gratification, but the moments of exquisite joy also come with being a Dad. Right now I'm wanting to be selfish - trying to decide between a Mazda 5 and an Hyundai Elantra Touring, but being pulled toward a gorgeous Ford Mustang. Sigh.
Kincaid - disgusted Republican Partisan since 2006.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
George K
Member Avatar
Finally
This should be a poll.
A guide to GKSR: Click

"Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... "
- Mik, 6/14/08


Nothing is as effective as homeopathy.

I'd rather listen to an hour of Abba than an hour of The Beatles.
- Klaus, 4/29/18
Online Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Free Rider
Member Avatar
Fulla-Carp
Does having kids make you unhappy?

That's a bizarre one. It reminds me of a joke I heard where two psychologists were passing each other in the hall and one said, "how are you?" the other thought for a second and replied, "what did you mean by that?"
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Frank_W
Member Avatar
Resident Misanthrope
:lol2:
Anatomy Prof: "The human body has about 20 sq. meters of skin."
Me: "Man, that's a lot of lampshades!"
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
RosemaryTwo
Member Avatar
HOLY CARP!!!
I love being a mom.

I went on a field trip today with my son's second-grade class. My son's face lit up when he saw me and he held my hand the whole time. Plus I got to see some cows and a really old farm house with an antique Steinway.
"Perhaps the thing to do is just to let stupid run its course." Aqua
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Ben
Member Avatar
Senior Carp
RosemaryTwo
Apr 2 2009, 02:48 PM
I love being a mom.

I went on a field trip today with my son's second-grade class. My son's face lit up when he saw me and he held my hand the whole time. Plus I got to see some cows and a really old farm house with an antique Steinway.
:lol: I love this place if only because you get stories that end like that :P
- Ben

"Playing 'bop' is like playing Scrabble with all the vowels missing." - Duke Ellington

bennieloohoo@gmail.com
Or you can just PM me. :P
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
RosemaryTwo
Member Avatar
HOLY CARP!!!
Yeah, the tour guide didn't know much about the piano, other than they had to remove a wall of the farmhouse to get it in.

It looked a bit like this, but not dusty:

Posted Image

I think the old ladies working for the historical society would have beat me up if I had tried to play the Snow is Dancing on it. :silly:
"Perhaps the thing to do is just to let stupid run its course." Aqua
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Frank_W
Member Avatar
Resident Misanthrope
It would have been worth the beat-down, R2. :thumb:
Anatomy Prof: "The human body has about 20 sq. meters of skin."
Me: "Man, that's a lot of lampshades!"
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
RosemaryTwo
Member Avatar
HOLY CARP!!!
Yeah, I'm a wuss. What are a few old ladies dressed in flouncy turn-of-the-century attire? I could play my piece and shove them off of me with my elbows at the same time.
"Perhaps the thing to do is just to let stupid run its course." Aqua
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Frank_W
Member Avatar
Resident Misanthrope
(and sell tickets to the event!) :lol2:
Anatomy Prof: "The human body has about 20 sq. meters of skin."
Me: "Man, that's a lot of lampshades!"
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Aqua Letifer
Member Avatar
ZOOOOOM!
RosemaryTwo
Apr 3 2009, 03:56 AM


I think the old ladies working for the historical society would have beat me up if I had tried to play the Snow is Dancing on it. :silly:
Back in school, I remember two -- no, three pianos in very good condition, just sitting around in conference rooms and other random places, never used.

You bet I invited myself in late at night and helped myself. :lol:
I cite irreconcilable differences.
Online Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
RosemaryTwo
Member Avatar
HOLY CARP!!!
Aqua -- don't think I'm not working on angle to play that thing when the old ladies aren't around.

My husband volunteers with local historical society. I'm hoping this connection can get me in after-hours. There's also a cool harpsichord in another old house closeby. I want to take my piano teacher in and hear him to some Bach on that thing, too.

If we get caught, I'll take my chances with a jury. It's the press I couldn't handle.
"Perhaps the thing to do is just to let stupid run its course." Aqua
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Frank_W
Member Avatar
Resident Misanthrope
I would love to pound out Danse Macabre at a whirling speed, on a harspichord. It would sound like two skeletons f'cking on a tin roof!! :lol2: :yesgrin:
Anatomy Prof: "The human body has about 20 sq. meters of skin."
Me: "Man, that's a lot of lampshades!"
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Renauda
Member Avatar
HOLY CARP!!!
Frank, Liszt wrote a great transcription of Danse Macabre for solo piano and with a little tweaking you could probably adapt it to the harpsichord setting on your stage piano.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Go to Next Page
« Previous Topic · The New Coffee Room · Next Topic »
Add Reply
  • Pages:
  • 1