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College Dating Sex Questions; Should I post here or at WTF?
Topic Started: Mar 30 2009, 09:32 AM (1,815 Views)
Pianolicious
Senior Carp
I need some dating advice. I would normally post it at WTF but with all the extra moderation I only feel safe posting "My gingham potholders are getting frayed" or "My silver flatware is tarnishing Page 1 2 3 4.... 9 10"

I know I present myself as gay, but I'm getting some really wierd feelings and, although they trouble me, I'm trying to be open-minded and go with them anyway.

So let's just cut to the chase:

Question 1: What are some ways to tell that women are attracted to you? What are some sure-fire signs they are horny?


Sit tibi vita longa et omnia bona!!! -- Dr. Spock
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blondie
Bull-Carp
Gah.
I'm practically geriatric.

okay then,
if she's scanned you for viruses & protection & is still smiling, i'd say she's wanting of you.

But I'll let the young pups answer ..
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Luke's Dad
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Emperor Pengin
Quote:
 
Question 1: What are some ways to tell that women are attracted to you? What are some sure-fire signs they are horny?


Are you attracted to them? If so, and they are still hanging around you, then they are probably attracted to you. Women are much better at telling a guy is interested, than vice versa. If she doesn't feel the same, she'll get the message across to you.

As far as telling when women are horny, it's all in the eyes. For an example, may I suggest renting The Lion King, and study the scene where a young adult Simba is frolicking with a young adult Nala(?). When he pins her, and she looks at him, note the eyes. Those are what are known as **** me eyes.
The problem with having an open mind is that people keep trying to put things in it.
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QuirtEvans
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I Owe It All To John D'Oh
Pianolicious
Mar 30 2009, 09:32 AM
I need some dating advice. I would normally post it at WTF but with all the extra moderation I only feel safe posting "My gingham potholders are getting frayed" or "My silver flatware is tarnishing Page 1 2 3 4.... 9 10"

I know I present myself as gay, but I'm getting some really wierd feelings and, although they trouble me, I'm trying to be open-minded and go with them anyway.

So let's just cut to the chase:

Question 1: What are some ways to tell that women are attracted to you? What are some sure-fire signs they are horny?


All the extra moderation?

Dude, we haven't actually moderated a single post yet.

Perception. Reality. Not the same.
It would be unwise to underestimate what large groups of ill-informed people acting together can achieve. -- John D'Oh, January 14, 2010.
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blondie
Bull-Carp
I used to get that look in my eyes ........
Then I switched to hypoallergenic mascara. ;) :D

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sue
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HOLY CARP!!!
I'm in the soon-to-be geriatic camp too, but would agree it's all in the eyes. Read the eyes.

edit: blondie :lol2:
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blondie
Bull-Carp
Actually PL .. just google it.

they say there's or parting of the lips (face), twirling of hair, certain types of touching, etc. whatever.

in this day & age .. in college .. i'd give it 2 hours max .. if she doesn't suggest having sex with you .. just move on to someone else.

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Bernard
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Senior Carp
PL, "... I'm trying to be open-minded and go with them anyway."

Sounds like a good idea. I did that once and ended up in bed with a woman! (more than once!) It was an interesting experience and I don't regret it, but I felt like a fish out of water. She was a lovely and beautiful person. It answered a lot of questions then, and it continues to answer a lot of questions.

Anyway, I knew she was interested when she invited me to her place to spend the night. I guess that was pretty obvious.
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blondie
Bull-Carp
Bernard
Mar 30 2009, 10:04 AM
Anyway, I knew she was interested when she invited me to her place to spend the night. I guess that was pretty obvious.
My point exactly but
better stated by Bernard.

Nothing is sure fire obvious PL. That is, .. until she asks you for it.

Plenty of girls can be attracted to a guy, be sitting there with him, getting horny & the guy would have nothing to do with it.

Believe it or not, we're a lot like you guys: Many little things can set us off.
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***musical princess***
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HOLY CARP!!!
Luke's Dad
Mar 30 2009, 09:47 AM
Quote:
 
Question 1: What are some ways to tell that women are attracted to you? What are some sure-fire signs they are horny?


As far as telling when women are horny, it's all in the eyes. For an example, may I suggest renting The Lion King, and study the scene where a young adult Simba is frolicking with a young adult Nala(?). When he pins her, and she looks at him, note the eyes. Those are what are known as **** me eyes.
As a 20 y/o (horny) female student, that's not a bad response at all.

If she's really obvious about it, watch for her staring at you with piercing eyes while biting the side of her bottom lip or touching/playing with her lip. It's not just a normal 'stare' though - it will be like she can't take her eyes off you or she will die, like she is trying to look straight into your soul, there will be a fire in her eyes if she wants you.

The only SURE-FIRE sign is her dragging you to bed. Other than that, try flirting a little with her and gauge her response... touch her arm when you talk or laugh together and linger a little longer than you normally would. If you catch her looking, look back for a while and smile with a playfull smile, then look away. Compliment her and make her feel included and comfortable in group conversations. If you catch her doing any of these things with you, it's pretty likely she likes you.

Sexual attraction is a game... and women know how to play very well.

x
x Caroline x
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Mikhailoh
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If you want trouble, find yourself a redhead
The challenge is not to determine whether or not she is interested in you, but to make her interested. It is much easier for a woman (and a man too) to want someone who shows they want them.
Once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead - Lucille Ball
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John D'Oh
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MAMIL
If you accidentally spill your drink on her and she doesn't storm off, then she's generally interested. If she gives you a cloth and asks you to dry her shirt, then it's hello cheeky!
What do you mean "we", have you got a mouse in your pocket?
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Red Rice
HOLY CARP!!!
Attracted? Touching. Women are much more sensitive about personal boundaries than men are, so if she touches you it's a pretty sure sign that she's welcoming physical closeness.

Horny? All body language. Eyes slightly closed with pupils dilated, staring at you or slightly downcast. Lips parted. Body leaning towards you. Shallow breathing. Even in crowded and noisy surroundings, the signs are pretty evident.
Civilisation, I vaguely realized then - and subsequent observation has confirmed the view - could not progress that way. It must have a greater guiding principle to survive. To treat it as a carcase off which each man tears as much as he can for himself, is to stand convicted a brute, fit for nothing better than a jungle existence, which is a death-struggle, leading nowhither. I did not believe that was the human destiny, for Man individually was sane and reasonable, only collectively a fool.

I hope the gunner of that Hun two-seater shot him clean, bullet to heart, and that his plane, on fire, fell like a meteor through the sky he loved. Since he had to end, I hope he ended so. But, oh, the waste! The loss!

- Cecil Lewis
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Frank_W
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Resident Misanthrope
Either that, or she's having some kind of allergic reaction. :unsure:

:sing: Do I read you correctly; You need me directly.
Help me with this parrrrrrrt.....
I try to comprehend you but I got a dyslexic heart... :sing:
Anatomy Prof: "The human body has about 20 sq. meters of skin."
Me: "Man, that's a lot of lampshades!"
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Red Rice
HOLY CARP!!!
Frank_W
Mar 30 2009, 12:23 PM
Either that, or she's having some kind of allergic reaction. :unsure:

Yeah, same difference.
Civilisation, I vaguely realized then - and subsequent observation has confirmed the view - could not progress that way. It must have a greater guiding principle to survive. To treat it as a carcase off which each man tears as much as he can for himself, is to stand convicted a brute, fit for nothing better than a jungle existence, which is a death-struggle, leading nowhither. I did not believe that was the human destiny, for Man individually was sane and reasonable, only collectively a fool.

I hope the gunner of that Hun two-seater shot him clean, bullet to heart, and that his plane, on fire, fell like a meteor through the sky he loved. Since he had to end, I hope he ended so. But, oh, the waste! The loss!

- Cecil Lewis
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Luke's Dad
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Emperor Pengin
Quote:
 
Horny? All body language. Eyes slightly closed with pupils dilated, staring at you or slightly downcast. Lips parted. Body leaning towards you. Shallow breathing. Even in crowded and noisy surroundings, the signs are pretty evident.


In short, **** me eyes.
The problem with having an open mind is that people keep trying to put things in it.
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Pianolicious
Senior Carp
Mikhailoh
Mar 30 2009, 11:50 AM
The challenge is not to determine whether or not she is interested in you, but to make her interested. It is much easier for a woman (and a man too) to want someone who shows they want them.
That sounds too much like work.

Quirt: I was just joking.

I have always been really clueless when people hit on me. Many years ago I tried my hand as a cable guy. I'd go into people's homes and I noticed that one woman in particular had a repeat problem. Every time I went into her house, there was Chippendale's dancers on the TV. Every time! The last time I went, she made a big production out of apologizing for the mess in her bedroom and kicked a very large vibrator under the bed. And I thought she was trying to make the room tidy for me.

So sometimes people need to drop an anvil on my head or something.

I've had some interesting experiences at school already where people hit on me but I only realized it after-the-fact. I was going to share the stories but I'm almost embarrassed to because they make me seem like a total idiot.

So I appreciate the input thus far.
Sit tibi vita longa et omnia bona!!! -- Dr. Spock
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Luke's Dad
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Emperor Pengin
Mikhailoh
Mar 30 2009, 11:50 AM
The challenge is not to determine whether or not she is interested in you, but to make her interested.
I'll agree with the first part (ask M&M's about our first date :devilgrin: )
Quote:
 
It is much easier for a woman (and a man too) to want someone who shows they want them.


There I have to disagree with you.
The problem with having an open mind is that people keep trying to put things in it.
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Pianolicious
Senior Carp
I'd have to disagree with that too. Everyone loves someone who's unavailable.
Sit tibi vita longa et omnia bona!!! -- Dr. Spock
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Frank_W
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Resident Misanthrope
I'm the same way. I miss all the subtle cues. I am oblivious... :tongue:
Anatomy Prof: "The human body has about 20 sq. meters of skin."
Me: "Man, that's a lot of lampshades!"
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big al
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Bull-Carp
Pianolicious
Mar 30 2009, 09:32 AM
I know I present myself as gay, but I'm getting some really wierd feelings and, although they trouble me, I'm trying to be open-minded and go with them anyway.
Now there are some issues presented by that statement, as I see it. Does the lady in question think of you as gay and therefore, a "safe" friend that she can be casual with without any risk of things escalating? Have you identified the nature of the feelings you describe as "weird"? Are they of a type you associate with sexual relations? Do you understand why they trouble you? The situation you present has more permutations than the basic boy-girl relationship, and those are complicated to begin with. I think you have to work out what you would like to do and feel comfortable doing insofar as possible before involving another person. I know a lot of questions can't be answered before getting involved, but a bit of caution is prudent I think. If there's a real fire cooking on both your parts, it won't be extinguished by going a little slow.

Maybe we'll be reading your story in the "Savage Love" column in the free weekly in a few months.

Big Al
Location: Western PA

"jesu, der simcha fun der man's farlangen."
-bachophile
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Pianolicious
Senior Carp
Trust me Big Al. I move really slow. Young people however move really fast. I've had plenty of sex in my life. I've lost 95% of my high school and college friends to AIDS. I'm not in any hurry to catch anything that would mean me having to live on a diet of really harsh pills the rest of my life. I am very clear about that.

Telling someone you are anything up front tells people that you assume they are attracted to you, which sends the wrong message during the getting-to-know-you period. It sounds like something you should do, but in practice it's hard to stick it into the conversation without sounding self-absorbed or presumptuous.

I got hit on in the library tonight judging from your replies. I wrongfully assumed that, pushing 50, that I'd be irrelevant to college-aged kids. I am beginning to realize that I am anything but. And that alone feels good. What's more, I grew my goatee back and the shock of gray in my chin seems to be a magnet.

When I was younger, "lunch" meant lunch. "dinner" meant dinner. A "date for the evening" might have meant more. Today, with a generation raised on the internet, ANYTHING means sex to young people. You'd think that with 8 years of Bush that they'd all be little prudes, but they all must have gone to Bristol Palin's finishing school. I'm way past all that.

I'm just being myself. It's all so new to me. I'm getting to know a more authentic person anyway -- myself, so I'll just take it a day at a time I guess. All those horny babes will have to take a number.

Sit tibi vita longa et omnia bona!!! -- Dr. Spock
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sue
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HOLY CARP!!!
Pianolicious
Mar 30 2009, 08:08 PM
All those horny babes will have to take a number.

heh :devilgrin: I've only seen photos of you, but in person I'd be flirting with you in the library too.
Have fun. :whome:
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blondie
Bull-Carp
It could be the gray.
Or maybe it's PL who has the f**k me eyes?
Ask yourself that.
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Frank_W
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Resident Misanthrope
Enjoy, PL. Even if you never act on it, it's still pretty cool to be sought after and regarded as sexy, even in your late 40's, by college coeds. How cool is that? :thumb:
Anatomy Prof: "The human body has about 20 sq. meters of skin."
Me: "Man, that's a lot of lampshades!"
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