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| More Fart Humor | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Jan 23 2009, 08:04 AM (608 Views) | |
| kathyk | Jan 23 2009, 08:04 AM Post #1 |
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Pisa-Carp
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Great new invention |
| Blogging in Palestine: http://kksjournal.com/ | |
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| Frank_W | Jan 23 2009, 08:16 AM Post #2 |
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Resident Misanthrope
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Besides, everyone knows that the worst ones are the stealthy ninja farts that make no sound but slither around in the blankets to ambush you by grabbing by the nostrils and suffocating you.Muahahahahaha....
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Anatomy Prof: "The human body has about 20 sq. meters of skin." Me: "Man, that's a lot of lampshades!" | |
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| Larry | Jan 23 2009, 08:39 AM Post #3 |
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Mmmmmmm, pie!
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Frank, Kathy is just trying to be "one of the guys". You see, to Kathy, we're a bunch of cretins over here who aren't as sophisticated as she is, so she's searching for a way to "fit in". She wouldn't bring this sort of thing up on WTF, since they're more sophisticated than us low class ignoramuses over here. So she figures that the way to our hearts over here is to tell a fart joke. |
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Of the Pokatwat Tribe | |
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| Frank_W | Jan 23 2009, 08:45 AM Post #4 |
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Resident Misanthrope
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Well, anyway... Farts are funny. (And yeah.. I'm an immature cretin. I admit it.)
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Anatomy Prof: "The human body has about 20 sq. meters of skin." Me: "Man, that's a lot of lampshades!" | |
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| apple | Jan 23 2009, 09:05 AM Post #5 |
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one of the angels
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you even give her trouble when it's not politics... that's just fartful. my favorite thing to do is to turn in mock horror to the person next to me, whenever I hear an audible fart. |
| it behooves me to behold | |
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| Axtremus | Jan 23 2009, 09:07 AM Post #6 |
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HOLY CARP!!!
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Would you fake a Victorian lady fainting too? I'd love to read how people react to that.
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| apple | Jan 23 2009, 09:13 AM Post #7 |
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one of the angels
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it is so funny Ax.. especially if I am the one doing the farting. what a laugh... it would be really funny to faint, and to tell you truth at the right moment, i would try that. |
| it behooves me to behold | |
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| big al | Jan 23 2009, 01:34 PM Post #8 |
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Bull-Carp
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There's a reason the whoopie cushion is still in production... Big Al |
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Location: Western PA "jesu, der simcha fun der man's farlangen." -bachophile | |
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| Larry | Jan 23 2009, 02:06 PM Post #9 |
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Mmmmmmm, pie!
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Do you know why women don't fart as often as men? They don't shut their mouths long enough for pressure to build up....... |
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Of the Pokatwat Tribe | |
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| Larry | Jan 23 2009, 02:07 PM Post #10 |
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Mmmmmmm, pie!
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I actually own one of those..... ![]() and occasionally, I use it..... |
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Of the Pokatwat Tribe | |
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| Jack Frost | Jan 23 2009, 02:18 PM Post #11 |
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Bull-Carp
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Larry, you assume she gives half a rat's ass what you think about her. You must be delusional. jf |
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| M&M's | Jan 23 2009, 02:22 PM Post #12 |
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Fulla-Carp
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As delusional as you for thinking Larry cares what you think. Ignore the stupid comments. Larry is a ignoramus when he spews this crap! |
| My child shows GOOD CHARACTERIZATION in an ongoing game of D&D | |
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| Larry | Jan 23 2009, 02:36 PM Post #13 |
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Mmmmmmm, pie!
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I wasn't talking about what she thinks of me, Jack. I was talking about what she thinks of everyone. |
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Of the Pokatwat Tribe | |
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| Frank_W | Jan 23 2009, 03:44 PM Post #14 |
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Resident Misanthrope
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At least we haven't gotten into the reason why men snore more than women.
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Anatomy Prof: "The human body has about 20 sq. meters of skin." Me: "Man, that's a lot of lampshades!" | |
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| kathyk | Jan 23 2009, 05:39 PM Post #15 |
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Pisa-Carp
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Don't even get me started on that one! |
| Blogging in Palestine: http://kksjournal.com/ | |
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| Free Rider | Jan 23 2009, 06:04 PM Post #16 |
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Fulla-Carp
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That video made me laugh. Hilarious! |
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| kenny | Jan 23 2009, 08:18 PM Post #17 |
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HOLY CARP!!!
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Kathy, that's funnier than crap. I think a straw shoved up your butt would work just as well. Larry, anyone with some good fart humor is okay by me. ![]() Untwist your panties. |
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| NAK | Jan 23 2009, 09:03 PM Post #18 |
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Senior Carp
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I like being on an elevator and pulling that. Especially if there is only one other guy on it. After I let it go, I make a disgusted face at him/her and noticeably back away (or, for added effect, pull my shirt up over my nose). Confuses the hell out of them. If I'm on my cell it's even better. "Whew! Dude this lady beside me just let out a cheeser." |
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| Mikhailoh | Jan 24 2009, 05:15 AM Post #19 |
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If you want trouble, find yourself a redhead
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The spirit of the Marx brothers still lives! Hurrah!!!! |
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Once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead - Lucille Ball | |
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| Larry | Jan 24 2009, 09:06 AM Post #20 |
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Mmmmmmm, pie!
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A long, long time ago I used to enjoy playing practical jokes.... ![]() One day I walked into a Hallmark Card store in a strip center. The store was narrow and deep, the narrow end being the front of the store. When you walked in, the sales counter took up all the front of the store, except for the door. The store had racks of cards lining the walls, then a "teepee" type display in the center. The only place you could walk was the circle around the teepee, the only way out was to walk by the sales counter at the front. When I went in there were 2 college aged girls (I was about 19 when I did this) behind the sales counter, and 3 more standing at the counter talking to them - and one guy in his early 30s in the very back of the store, shopping. I had been suffering from the "huge winds" all day... and the pressure was building.. so, *opportunity for some fun!* The guy shopping would bend down, pick a card to look at, stand up to look at it, bend down to put it back.... and as you know, doing that can eventually cause your face to turn a little red.....I walked back to where the guy was, waited for him to bend over and reach for a card on the bottom shelf. Just as he bent all the way down I let fly a fart that jarred the racks..... He jumped straight up, his face red from a combination of having been bent over, and being embarrassed by the noise - only to find me walking away from him very quickly, looking back at him in utter disgust, saying "Good grief man, what is *wrong* with you!?!?" ![]() He looked like he wanted to die.. his face got deep red... he was making faces and body movements to indicate he was innocent, but it was no use.. his red face, his panic stricken look, me running away from him in "horror" blaming it on him... his fate was sealed.... he had to walk out passed all those girls, with all of them thinking he'd farted.... ![]() |
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Of the Pokatwat Tribe | |
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| Frank_W | Jan 24 2009, 09:48 AM Post #21 |
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Resident Misanthrope
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![]() Bookstores are horrible. I don't know what it is about them, but I can be just fine all day and then walk into a bookstore. The minute I begin browsing, the trouser-coughs begin. Nothing worse than ducking into the "Classical Poetry" aisle to rip off a fetid, paint-peeling fart, only for some cute, buxom young lass to decide she needs to browse for a copy of "Beowulf" before I have the chance to escape.
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Anatomy Prof: "The human body has about 20 sq. meters of skin." Me: "Man, that's a lot of lampshades!" | |
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| NAK | Jan 24 2009, 10:12 AM Post #22 |
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Senior Carp
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Stepping on to the elevator, Jim notices an unpleasant odour, emitting apparently the sweet old lady standing alone inside. Making a face, he asks her, "Excuse me, did break wind?" "Of course I did! Do you think I smell like this all the time?!" |
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| Larry | Jan 24 2009, 10:20 AM Post #23 |
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Mmmmmmm, pie!
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Have you ever been on a crowded elevator and heard someone fart, and then noticed the faces of all the people as they try to act like nothing happened, try to not look guilty, and try to not laugh their ass off? ![]() |
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Of the Pokatwat Tribe | |
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| kenny | Jan 24 2009, 10:24 AM Post #24 |
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HOLY CARP!!!
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People let it rip when they are alone and not expecting company. This makes our 15 piano tuning practice rooms very dangerous territory if you visit your neighbor for a break. |
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| Mikhailoh | Jan 24 2009, 10:43 AM Post #25 |
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If you want trouble, find yourself a redhead
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I just did that dance at Barnes and Noble this very morning. The business book section is usually pretty empty. Until you get there and rip one off. |
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Once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead - Lucille Ball | |
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Besides, everyone knows that the worst ones are the stealthy ninja farts that make no sound but slither around in the blankets to ambush you by grabbing by the nostrils and suffocating you.




8:46 AM Jul 13