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My engagement ring isn't good enough
Topic Started: Apr 19 2008, 02:01 AM (3,040 Views)
Daniel
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HOLY CARP!!!
I can't rant at Pricescope so I want to write this post and get this off my chest. There was a post by a woman who received a 1.5 ct engagement ring (that's huge- the average engagement ring is something like .35) and she wrote a post- I am going to paraphrase the main points.

It's an asccher (spelling?) square step cut (like the one in Kenny's avatar) and they "face up" smaller than other cuts. Apparently she was telling her friends that it was 1.5 cts (how rude to go around telling people that anyway) and they keep telling her that it doesn't look bigger than 1 ct (again how rude could you be). SO, she writes a post saying "would I be a horrible, nasty, greedy, selfish, lower than dirt person" if she asks her finance to buy her a bigger ring!

WTF? When you get an engagement ring, you don't give it back and say it's not good enough, especially because it's not impressive enough to your friends. How utterly selfish is that?


A lot of these women who post on this diamond forum think nothing of asking for better rings and "upgrading" their engagement rings. Is this what tradition is supposed to be about? Since it's a diamond forum, people reply by saying "YOU have to be happy, so if you're not happy ask for a bigger one". :doh:
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Mikhailoh
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If you want trouble, find yourself a redhead
She's not really talking about the diamond, you know.
Once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead - Lucille Ball
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Dewey
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HOLY CARP!!!
If I'd seen the post, I'd have registered for the forum and replied something like, "Yes, you would be an incredibly shallow lout if you wanted to ask for a bigger diamond. But yes, if that's the way you feel, you should go ahead and ask him for a bigger one - so he can see what kind of self-centered gold digger you are, in time for him to ditch you before he made the huge mistake of marrying you."
"By nature, i prefer brevity." - John Calvin, Institutes of the Christian Religion, p. 685.

"Never waste your time trying to explain yourself to people who are committed to misunderstanding you." - Anonymous

"Oh sure, every once in a while a turd floated by, but other than that it was just fine." - Joe A., 2011

I'll answer your other comments later, but my primary priority for the rest of the evening is to get drunk." - Klaus, 12/31/14
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Axtremus
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HOLY CARP!!!
She wants a better engagement ring?
What's she offering for dowry to deserve a better engagement ring? :huh:
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Axtremus
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HOLY CARP!!!
By the way, down with DeBeers.

It's DeBeers fault that people today value the diamond ring more than the really important stuff (like the dowry).
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kenny
HOLY CARP!!!
Daniel you are right, you really CAN'T rant at PS.
Women are different than men, and those women (many of the regular PS posters) are different from other women.
They will eat you for lunch if you challenge them on their diamond views.
They will start by gouging your eyes out.
Next they'll disembowel you while you are still alive then throw you into a huge cast iron vat of boiling acid, as they all cackle maniacally.

Many of them attach enormous meaning to the size of their rock.
They see it as is a symbol that rates them personally, and announces their place in society's pecking order.

I used to challenge them on things.
I'd state my priority of the 4-Cs are, cut, clarity, color, carat, in that order.
99% of people put carat, or size, first or second not last.
Regulars would invariably direct newbies to the largest stone for their money. (they'd have low color and clarity)
I'd point out other stones to consider just in case color an clarity are more important than size to the newbie.
Oh Man! The PS royalty ganged up and attacked me viscously.

Today, I don't care if they think in terms of status symbols.
Live and let live.

BTW, I'm positive many of the people posting on PS are shills and sockies of the vendors drumming up business for the favored PS vendors.
Hence the constant barrage of diamond-upgrading threads. "My husband proposed with only a .5 carat so help me find a good 1-carat".
They have even started a new tradition of "the 5-year upgrade and the 10-year upgrade" etc.
That old clever DeBeers ad campaign, "Isn't She Worth 3-month's Salary?" has nothing on the PS culture.

They even invented a term, DSS, diamond shrinkage syndrome.
After wearing it for a while your diamond shrinks.
"Oh NO! I've only had my 1.5 carat upgrade for two years and already I'm suffering from DSS. Could anyone here help me pick a nice 2-carat?" :doh:

PS has a dark side.
It is not really the 100% neutral consumer-oriented diamond-education site it claims to be.
Yes, it does that and it does it well; you can get tons of credible valuable diamond education there.
But it is clearly owned by someone who has a business interest related to a part of the pearl industry and goes way too far in brutally moderating people who don't tow their line.

Still the goods from their vendors like Whiteflash and Good Old Gold are superior in quality and price to what you find at Tiffany, Harry Winston, Cartier, etc. and of course the mauls.
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schindler
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Fulla-Carp
My fiancee is perfectly satisfied with her smaller stone (info/contacts courtesy of our own Kenny). B*tching about something as stupid as diamond size is indicative of something else. I pity the guy who's going to marry her. . .

We're all mad here!
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DivaDeb
HOLY CARP!!!
kenny
Apr 19 2008, 10:21 AM
Daniel you are right, you really CAN'T rant at PS.
Women are different than men, and those women (many of the regular PS posters) are different from other women.
They will eat you for lunch if you challenge them on their diamond views.
They will start by gouging your eyes out.
Next they'll disembowel you while you are still alive then throw you into a huge cast iron vat of boiling acid, as they all cackle maniacally.


:lol:

yuck! WONDERFUL DESCRIPTION THOUGH!!!

Wow...I love my engagement ring. It's pretty small (1/3 carat) and not even a particularly good diamond. It was an antique when we bought it...so now it's REALLY old...and I wouldn't trade it for anything. It's my ring...and it would look stupid with a huge diamond in it. I want my ring, my diamond, my husband. The thing I love about my ring is that nobody has one even remotely like it...it's completely unique. My fingers would look pretty silly with a big honkin diamond sitting on them anyway.

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Mikhailoh
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If you want trouble, find yourself a redhead
It's about forming a marriage and family - not the trappings. Jeezel.
Once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead - Lucille Ball
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Daniel
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HOLY CARP!!!
kenny
Apr 19 2008, 07:21 AM
BTW, I'm positive many of the people posting on PS are shills and sockies of the vendors drumming up business for the favored PS vendors.

That makes sense. That email I got from the moderator after I asked someone if they were a shill. No wonder. I touched a nerve.

The person was a shill, too. It was so obvious. But a shill for Tiffany and Co.
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John D'Oh
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MAMIL
Three words - 50% divorce rate. The bloke should agree to give the bimbo a better ring on their 10th wedding anniversary.
What do you mean "we", have you got a mouse in your pocket?
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kenny
HOLY CARP!!!
John D'Oh
Apr 19 2008, 01:24 PM
Three words - 50% divorce rate.

Isn't that 4 words?

Bored? - Who ME? :leaving:
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jon-nyc
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Cheers
Daniel
Apr 19 2008, 06:01 AM
SO, she writes a post saying "would I be a horrible, nasty, greedy, selfish, lower than dirt person" if she asks her finance to buy her a bigger ring!

Wearing a ring that size would mark her as high prole.
In my defense, I was left unsupervised.
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Phlebas
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Bull-Carp
Geez! It used to be "no hymen, no diamond."

Now they all have eyepieces?

Glad I'm not out there.

Posted Image
Random FML: Today, I was fired by my boss in front of my coworkers. It would have been nice if I could have left the building before they started celebrating. FML

The founding of the bulk of the world's nation states post 1914 is based on self-defined nationalisms. The bulk of those national movements involve territory that was ethnically mixed. The foundation of many of those nation states involved population movements in the aftermath. When the only one that is repeatedly held up as unjust and unjustifiable is the Zionist project, the term anti-semitism may very well be appropriate. - P*D


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kenny
HOLY CARP!!!
double post
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kenny
HOLY CARP!!!
jon-nyc
Apr 19 2008, 01:43 PM
Daniel
Apr 19 2008, 06:01 AM
SO, she writes a post saying "would I be a horrible, nasty, greedy, selfish, lower than dirt person" if she asks her finance to buy her a bigger ring!

Wearing a ring that size would mark her as high prole.

In your mind.

I love this subject.
It is surprising how few people have a live and let live attitude about diamonds.

They project their judgments onto others.
Diamonds of a certain size mean this or that (good or bad).

One woman wants a 1.5 carat so she can feel good about herself.
Another person sees a 1.5 carat on her finger and says, "Oh, anyone who would wear a diamond that large is an XYZ."

The next woman would be humiliated to have anything under 3 carats.
The next woman would feel silly wearing anything over 1/4 carat or any diamond at all.

Few people are relaxed and nonchalant about people wearing diamonds.

Diamonds push people's buttons.
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Phlebas
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Bull-Carp
I understand what Jon says, and - not speaking for him - I don't think his buttons are being pushed.

If I see a certain type of person wearing a largish diamond, it makes a certain impression.
If I see a different type of person with the same diamond, it makes a different impression.

Random FML: Today, I was fired by my boss in front of my coworkers. It would have been nice if I could have left the building before they started celebrating. FML

The founding of the bulk of the world's nation states post 1914 is based on self-defined nationalisms. The bulk of those national movements involve territory that was ethnically mixed. The foundation of many of those nation states involved population movements in the aftermath. When the only one that is repeatedly held up as unjust and unjustifiable is the Zionist project, the term anti-semitism may very well be appropriate. - P*D


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kenny
HOLY CARP!!!
Impressions come from the viewer as much as from the viewed.

Some people have a diamond, car, watch, house, lawn or a nice piano not for others but for their own enjoyment - or both.

Everything is okay.
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Phlebas
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Bull-Carp
kenny
Apr 19 2008, 02:03 PM
Impressions come from the viewer as much as from the viewed.

Some people wear a diamond not for others but for their own enjoyment.

Then they should have their enjoyment, and I can have my impressions. No buttons pushed here.
Random FML: Today, I was fired by my boss in front of my coworkers. It would have been nice if I could have left the building before they started celebrating. FML

The founding of the bulk of the world's nation states post 1914 is based on self-defined nationalisms. The bulk of those national movements involve territory that was ethnically mixed. The foundation of many of those nation states involved population movements in the aftermath. When the only one that is repeatedly held up as unjust and unjustifiable is the Zionist project, the term anti-semitism may very well be appropriate. - P*D


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kenny
HOLY CARP!!!
No problem.

No shame in having buttons.
We all do.

You and I are pushing each others buttons right now.
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Horace
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HOLY CARP!!!
Thankfully there is a happy symmetry between the kind of personality I can get along well with, and the kind of personality which doesn't place a high importance on teh size and expense of diamond rings and such. And even if that symmetry didn't exist, if a woman would rather we spend our money on a huge sparkly rock than save it for our children or retirements, that would be a deal breaker regardless.

The whole diamond wedding/engagement ring thing is repugnant to me anyway (as is the whole jewely industry to a lesser degree). Women who want huge diamonds on their fingers want to communicate an idea (the social hierarchy thing prevously mentioned), rather than wear something that looks pretty.
As a good person, I implore you to do as I, a good person, do. Be good. Do NOT be bad. If you see bad, end bad. End it in yourself, and end it in others. By any means necessary, the good must conquer the bad. Good people know this. Do you know this? Are you good?
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sue
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HOLY CARP!!!
kenny
Apr 19 2008, 03:03 PM
Impressions come from the viewer as much as from the viewed.

Some people wear a diamond not for others but for their own enjoyment.

An elegant, well dressed person with a large diamond gives quite a different impression than say, a dude who is also sporting large flashy chains around his neck, and ill-fitting trousers hanging halfway down his bum, or a gum smacking overly bleached blonde carrying a pretend dog and chatting on her cell phone.

Guess I'm just a snob. :tongue:
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DivaDeb
HOLY CARP!!!
Diamonds are like boobs...some women carry off big ones just fine. Others...one look and you think, "fake"

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kenny
HOLY CARP!!!
sue
Apr 19 2008, 02:13 PM
kenny
Apr 19 2008, 03:03 PM
Impressions come from the viewer as much as from the viewed.

Some people wear a diamond not for others but for their own enjoyment.

An elegant, well dressed person with a large diamond gives quite a different impression than say, a dude who is also sporting large flashy chains around his neck, and ill-fitting trousers hanging halfway down his bum, or a gum smacking overly bleached blonde carrying a pretend dog and chatting on her cell phone.

Guess I'm just a snob. :tongue:

Cite any example.
Impressions are formulated in the brain of the viewer.
Those people you describe are perfect in their own way.

Your impression of them is not "out there"; it is not absolute.

We are responsible for our judgments and associations we make about people.
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kenny
HOLY CARP!!!
DivaDeb
Apr 19 2008, 02:17 PM
Diamonds are like boobs...some women carry off big ones just fine. Others...one look and you think, "fake"

Nyuck Nyuck Nyuck
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