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| Another DB Question -; Attractive? Repellent? | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Apr 15 2007, 06:09 PM (198 Views) | |
| Mikhailoh | Apr 15 2007, 06:09 PM Post #1 |
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If you want trouble, find yourself a redhead
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Per David Burton's Confession thread - Q. What makes someone “attractive” and what makes them “repellent” and what is the specific message for me (us) in this? We all fall short of attractive from time to time, but for me, what makes one attractive is independence, an open, keen mind, an interest in ideas, and the people around them, values that coincide with my own, and, for me, a general openness. I find people who are constantly closed or hidden to be, while not repellent, certainly less atttractive. This does not mean they have to be sweet - many of my friends have been more curmudgeonly than me. I tend to like and respect people who believe as I do, that if you live according to what you believe is right you win. No matter what else. If you let your standards be dictated by the actions of those around you you have lost everything. |
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Once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead - Lucille Ball | |
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| QuirtEvans | Apr 15 2007, 06:12 PM Post #2 |
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I Owe It All To John D'Oh
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For me, three things, most of all: A sense of humor and a willingness to laugh, particularly at themselves. A sharp wit. And charisma. With those three things, almost anyone is attractive to me. |
| It would be unwise to underestimate what large groups of ill-informed people acting together can achieve. -- John D'Oh, January 14, 2010. | |
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| David Burton | Apr 15 2007, 06:28 PM Post #3 |
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Senior Carp
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To me, this was one of the more interesting questions I posed. Attractive in the most basic sense means getting my attention and holding it in some unforgettable way. Is that a lot to ask? Probably, since you can’t just ask that it be so. There’s something going on that’s mysterious; we are mutually interested in each other from the physical right down to the core essences of our beings. It covers more than a range of shared opinions or interests, though those may be important components to it too. I have always been attracted by people with a s slightly nervy impetuous even insolent way of just walking into my life and doing whatever they please around me. That sort of breathless ecstasy that they can produce is hard to forget. It’s amazing how many people just don’t like such people when frankly in my opinion there are far too few of them, especially among women. Among men, well some of the same type can be dangerous. Then again so can some of the women. There is a modern phrase “edgy” that comes close to describing it. It’s also been my impression that the comfort I can derive from giving the “edgy” people more comfort than they have ever expected before is richly rewarded. That’s sort of what being married was like for me. What’s repellent ranges from those whose views seem so oppressive that I feel I can’t even breathe to a range of traits I usually associate with “control freaks” or those who get off on trying to manipulate others. These people frankly drive me to consider rather violent thoughts that I often must bear to the confessional. Oh well, it must be something I guess as I’m far from perfect. Notice I haven’t mentioned anything physical. Should I? OK, I married a classic brunette and I should consider the “unlikes attract” idea more important than it seems it gets credit for. The darket toned girls have usually liked me more than I liked them whereas I was often chasing the higher toned girls who often never knew I existed. I have this fantasy of having the perfect physical mate, about the same height – 5’8” in heels – blonde and glowing – walking with me into a room and everyone looks at us and says “ah!.” No, it will never happen. I never get the glad eye from them. More likely some sultry woman or black eyed Susan will eventually find me. But she’d better be vivacious, quirky, independent and funny. There’s more but I’ll wait to see what others say. Pass the ribs and I’ll have more beer please. Thanks. |
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| Axtremus | Apr 15 2007, 07:24 PM Post #4 |
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HOLY CARP!!!
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Just copying-and-pasting from my response in David Burton's "Going to Confession" thread:
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12:44 AM Jul 13