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Kracked Kristmas Songs
Topic Started: Dec 24 2006, 11:37 AM (141 Views)
Claude Ball
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Middle Aged Carp
To the tune of "Here Comes Santa Claus"

There goes Santa Claus
There goes Santa Claus
Headin' straight toward Sears,
His belly's fallin'
Out of his pants
And his beard's
Coming loose from his ears,

Now I don't know
Where he will go
But give him lots of space,
For he must be
About to pee
You can see it on his face.

There went Santa Claus
There went Santa Claus
In front of Macy's door,
Now I don't guess
That he will work
In this old mall no more,

It must have been
That jug of gin
I saw up under his chair,
The security guard
Looked mighty hard
'Cause the pee went everywhere.

There goes Santa Claus
There goes Santa Claus
Headin' straight to jail,
The maintenance man
with his mop and pan
Just kicked him in the tail,

Now how will he
Bring gifts to me
With his hands cuffed at the wrist?
And can't they see
That kids like me
Are getting mighty pissed?


Dain bramage caused my peach imspediment.
Tooth? Tooth? You can't handle the tooth!
Remember: He who laughs last, thinks slowest.....
DON'T BEND OVER IN THE GARDEN, MARGARET - THEM TATER'S GOT EYES!
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Claude Ball
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Middle Aged Carp
To the tune of Jingle Bells"

Dashing through the den,
With my hand up to my nose,
The air got mighty thin,
When Bubba's fat leg rose,

Everybody fled,
There was panic everywhere,
Lord you'd think that he was dead
From the fog that hit the air.

(Chorus)

Oh,
Bubba smells,
Bubba smells,
Bubba has no heart,
Oh how hard
It is to breathe
When Bubba cuts a fart,

Oh,
Bubba smells
Bubba smells
He is such a nerd,
From the smell
A fool could tell
He's blowin' passed a turd..

Dain bramage caused my peach imspediment.
Tooth? Tooth? You can't handle the tooth!
Remember: He who laughs last, thinks slowest.....
DON'T BEND OVER IN THE GARDEN, MARGARET - THEM TATER'S GOT EYES!
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George K
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Finally
An homage to The Little Hummer Girl in this thread.

(I'm sure this'll get moderated)

(Parody of Little Drummer Boy)

The Little Hummer Girl - audio.

Lyrics:

And they told me
Pa rum pum pum pum
A president to see
Pa rum pum pum pum
Your finest knee pads bring
Pa rum pum pum pum
To kneel before the king
Pa rum pum pum pum
Rum pum pum pum
Rum pum pum pum

Oh, to pleasure him
Pa rum pum pum pum
Make him come

Little intern
Pa rum pum pum pum
I am a horn dog Pres.
Pa rum pum pum pum
Return those gifts I bring
Pa rum pum pum pum
And do your dry cleaning
Pa rum pum pum pum
Rum pum pum pum
Rum pum pum pum

I played the flute for him
Pa rum pum pum pum
Made him come

Show him my bum

Show him my bum

Show him my bum

The Little Hummer Girlthis thread.
A guide to GKSR: Click

"Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... "
- Mik, 6/14/08


Nothing is as effective as homeopathy.

I'd rather listen to an hour of Abba than an hour of The Beatles.
- Klaus, 4/29/18
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