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Write your own "Dear Santa" letter
Topic Started: Dec 17 2006, 06:45 AM (123 Views)
George K
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Finally
Remember "Mad Libs?"

(no, Larry, this is NOT a political thread)
A guide to GKSR: Click

"Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... "
- Mik, 6/14/08


Nothing is as effective as homeopathy.

I'd rather listen to an hour of Abba than an hour of The Beatles.
- Klaus, 4/29/18
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pianojerome
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HOLY CARP!!!
Santa Claus
North Pole, Earth

Dear Santa,


I have been a good boy.
It really wasn't my fault what happened at George's Office party. It was CrashTest who spiked the punch with too much Chocolate milk. I can't help it if I drank 42 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like garlic.

I thought it was funny when I put Dolmansaxlil's yarmulka on my head and danced the mazurka on the chair while singing `Fugue in G Minor'. I didn't mean to break George's shaver and don't know why George would accuse me of public performance of 4'33''.

I don't remember calling John D'Oh's wife a silly goose---even though she looked like one with purple eye shadow and royal green lipstick!

And when I threw up on Jane D'Oh's husband's pinky, it was only because I ate too much of that seven-layer cake.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my train through my neighbor's bathroom. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a meshuga lobster and have me arrested for radio broadcast of 4'33''!

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all stinky and smelly. And I'm really not to blame for any of this giggly stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!

Sincerely and heartily yours,
Sam (Really a nice boy!)

P.S. It's only 17 bucks!
Sam
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George K
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Finally
Very, funny, PJ. This thread has great potential.... :juggle:
A guide to GKSR: Click

"Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... "
- Mik, 6/14/08


Nothing is as effective as homeopathy.

I'd rather listen to an hour of Abba than an hour of The Beatles.
- Klaus, 4/29/18
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LWpianistin
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HOLY CARP!!!
Santa Claus
North Pole, Earth


Dear Santa,

I have been a good Girl.
It really wasn't my fault what happened at MP's Office party. It was Larry who spiked the punch with too much White Russian. I can't help it if I drank 88 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like mothballs.

I thought it was funny when I put Sam's undershirt on my head and danced the Ceilidh on the bed while singing `Peace Piece'. I didn't mean to break MP's toaster and don't know why MP would accuse me of murder.

I don't remember calling George's wife a greasy sheep---even though she looked like one with fushia eye shadow and dun lipstick!

And when I threw up on Deb's husband's elbow, it was only because I ate too much of that tripe.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my tricycle through my neighbor's attic. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a shaggy dog and have me arrested for robbery!

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all hairy and smelly. And I'm really not to blame for any of this fat stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!

Sincerely and crazily yours,
Miriam (Really a nice Girl!)

P.S. It's only 7 bucks!

And how are you today?
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LWpianistin
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HOLY CARP!!!
*bump*

I want to see what other people come up with.
And how are you today?
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***musical princess***
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HOLY CARP!!!
Hehehe!!! ^_^ :D


Santa Claus
North Pole, Earth


Dear Santa,

I have been a good Girl.
It really wasn't my fault what happened at Isaac's Office party. It was Frank who spiked the punch with too much Wine. I can't help it if I drank 9 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like Dolce Vita.

I thought it was funny when I put George's Knickers on my head and danced the Tango on the Bed while singing `Lady Marmalade'. I didn't mean to break Isaac's Vibrator and don't know why Isaac would accuse me of Murder.

I don't remember calling Ivory's wife a Bright Cow---even though she looked like one with Black eye shadow and Red lipstick!

And when I threw up on Debs's husband's Breasts, it was only because I ate too much of that Clotted Cream.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my Car through my neighbor's Bedroom. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a Dirty Dog and have me arrested for Theft!

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all Loud and Big. And I'm really not to blame for any of this Hot stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!

Sincerely and Slowly yours,
Caroline (Really a nice Girl!)

P.S. It's only 100 bucks!

x
x Caroline x
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Jane D'Oh
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Fulla-Carp
Slowly yours!! :lol:
Pfft.
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***musical princess***
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HOLY CARP!!!
:D

x
x Caroline x
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LWpianistin
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HOLY CARP!!!
Deb's husband was in the wrong place at the wrong time twice! He must not have appreciated it at all! :lol:
And how are you today?
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***musical princess***
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HOLY CARP!!!
The poor man is COVERED in sick! :P

x
x Caroline x
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pianojerome
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HOLY CARP!!!
***musical princess***
Dec 18 2006, 02:47 PM
I didn't mean to break Isaac's Vibrator

:mellow:
Sam
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LWpianistin
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HOLY CARP!!!
pianojerome
Dec 18 2006, 03:35 PM
***musical princess***
Dec 18 2006, 02:47 PM
I didn't mean to break Isaac's Vibrator

:mellow:

:lol:

That made me LOL, and my mom (who is working right now) gave me a curious look. I ignored it, and (thankfully) she didn't ask.
And how are you today?
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