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Monty Python and the Holy Grail Just Arrived
Topic Started: Nov 25 2006, 11:40 AM (482 Views)
Luke's Dad
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Emperor Pengin
The quotes will begin tonight!
The problem with having an open mind is that people keep trying to put things in it.
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Aqua Letifer
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ZOOOOOM!
Listen, strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government! You can't expect to weild supreme executive power just because some watery tart threw a sword at you! If I went 'round sayin' I was an emporer just because some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away!

I started early. :D
I cite irreconcilable differences.
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***musical princess***
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HOLY CARP!!!
Come and see the violence inherent in the system. Help! Help! I'm being repressed!

x
x Caroline x
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Dewey
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HOLY CARP!!!
"He must be a king."
"How do you know?"
"He hasn't got sh!t all over him."
"By nature, i prefer brevity." - John Calvin, Institutes of the Christian Religion, p. 685.

"Never waste your time trying to explain yourself to people who are committed to misunderstanding you." - Anonymous

"Oh sure, every once in a while a turd floated by, but other than that it was just fine." - Joe A., 2011

I'll answer your other comments later, but my primary priority for the rest of the evening is to get drunk." - Klaus, 12/31/14
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bachophile
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HOLY CARP!!!
GIRLS: A spanking! A spanking!
DINGO: You must spank her well, and after you have spanked her, you may deal with her as you like, and then, spank me.
AMAZING: And spank me.
STUNNER: And me.
LOVELY: And me.
DINGO: Yes. Yes, you must give us all a good spanking!
GIRLS: A spanking! A spanking! There is going to be a spanking tonight!
DINGO: And after the spanking, the oral sex.
GIRLS: The oral sex! The oral sex!
GALAHAD: Well, I could stay a bit longer.
"I don't know much about classical music. For years I thought the Goldberg Variations were something Mr. and Mrs. Goldberg did on their wedding night." Woody Allen
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bachophile
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HOLY CARP!!!
ARTHUR: O Knights of Ni, we have brought you your shrubbery. May we go now?
HEAD KNIGHT: It is a good shrubbery. I like the laurels particularly,... but there is one small problem.
ARTHUR: What is that?
HEAD KNIGHT: We are now... no longer the Knights Who Say 'Ni'.
KNIGHTS OF NI: Ni! Shh!
HEAD KNIGHT: Shh! We are now the Knights Who Say 'Ecky-ecky-ecky-ecky-pikang-zoop-boing-goodem-zoo-owli-zhiv'.
RANDOM: Ni!
HEAD KNIGHT: Therefore, we must give you a test.
ARTHUR: What is this test, O Knights of-- knights who till recently said 'ni'?
HEAD KNIGHT: Firstly, you must find... another shrubbery!
"I don't know much about classical music. For years I thought the Goldberg Variations were something Mr. and Mrs. Goldberg did on their wedding night." Woody Allen
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Tim the Enchanter
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Advanced Member
There are some who call me.....Tim?
Summoning up fire without flint or tinder since 1974.
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apple
one of the angels
bachophile
Nov 25 2006, 03:47 PM
GIRLS: A spanking! A spanking!
DINGO: You must spank her well, and after you have spanked her, you may deal with her as you like, and then, spank me.
AMAZING: And spank me.
STUNNER: And me.
LOVELY: And me.
DINGO: Yes. Yes, you must give us all a good spanking!
GIRLS: A spanking! A spanking! There is going to be a spanking tonight!
DINGO: And after the spanking, the oral sex.
GIRLS: The oral sex! The oral sex!
GALAHAD: Well, I could stay a bit longer.

that has to be my favorite quote :D
it behooves me to behold
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CTPianotech
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Fulla-Carp
Posted Image

It's just a flesh wound.


:whome:
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Dewey
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HOLY CARP!!!
"Oh what are you going to do, bleed on me?!"
"By nature, i prefer brevity." - John Calvin, Institutes of the Christian Religion, p. 685.

"Never waste your time trying to explain yourself to people who are committed to misunderstanding you." - Anonymous

"Oh sure, every once in a while a turd floated by, but other than that it was just fine." - Joe A., 2011

I'll answer your other comments later, but my primary priority for the rest of the evening is to get drunk." - Klaus, 12/31/14
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George K
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Finally
I don't wanna talk to you no more, you empty headed animal food trough wiper! I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!
A guide to GKSR: Click

"Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... "
- Mik, 6/14/08


Nothing is as effective as homeopathy.

I'd rather listen to an hour of Abba than an hour of The Beatles.
- Klaus, 4/29/18
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Dewey
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HOLY CARP!!!
"Bring out your dead.... (clang!).... Bring out your dead...."
"By nature, i prefer brevity." - John Calvin, Institutes of the Christian Religion, p. 685.

"Never waste your time trying to explain yourself to people who are committed to misunderstanding you." - Anonymous

"Oh sure, every once in a while a turd floated by, but other than that it was just fine." - Joe A., 2011

I'll answer your other comments later, but my primary priority for the rest of the evening is to get drunk." - Klaus, 12/31/14
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CTPianotech
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Fulla-Carp
Posted Image

"I'm not dead yet!"
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Nobody's Sock
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Fulla-Carp
We're Knights of the Round Table.
Our shows are formidable,
But many times we're given rhymes
That are quite unsingable.
We're opera mad in Camelot.
We sing from the diaphragm a lot.
in war we're tough and able,
Quite indefatigable.
Between our quests we sequin vests and impersonate Clark Gable.
It's a busy life in Camelot.
"Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known."
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CTPianotech
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Fulla-Carp
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Bravely bold Sir Robin rode forth from Camelot
He was not afraid to die, O brave Sir Robin
He was not at all afraid to be killed in nasty ways
Brave, brave, brave, brave Sir Robin
He was not in the least bit scared to be mashed into a pulp
Or to have his eyes gouged out and his elbows broken
To have his kneecaps split and his body burned away
And all his limbs hacked and mangled, brave Sir Robin
His head smashed in and his heart cut out
And his liver removed and his bowels unplugged
And his nostrils raped and his bottom burnt off and his penis...
He is brave Sir Robin,
Brave Sir Robin who...
To fight and...............
Brave Sir Robin ran away
Bravely, ran away...away...
When danger reared its ugly head
He bravely turned his tail and fled
Yes, brave Sir Robin turned about
And gallantly he chickened out
Bravely talking to his feet
He beat a very brave retreat
Bravest of the brave, Sir Robin
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LWpianistin
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HOLY CARP!!!
1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: Are you suggesting coconuts migrate?
And how are you today?
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mrenaud
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Middle Aged Carp
LAUNCELOT: Have we got bows?
ARTHUR: No.
LAUNCELOT: We have the Holy Hand Grenade.
ARTHUR: Yes, of course! The Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch! 'Tis one of the sacred relics Brother Maynard carries with him. Brother Maynard! Bring up the Holy Hand Grenade!
MONKS: [chanting] Pie Iesu domine, dona eis requiem.
ARTHUR: How does it, um-- how does it work?
LAUNCELOT: I know not, my liege.
ARTHUR: Consult the Book of Armaments!
BROTHER MAYNARD: Armaments, chapter two, verses nine to twenty-one.
SECOND BROTHER: And Saint Attila raised the hand grenade up on high, saying, "O Lord, bless this Thy hand grenade that, with it, Thou mayest blow Thine enemies to tiny bits in Thy mercy." And the Lord did grin, and the people did feast upon the lambs and sloths and carp and anchovies and orangutans and breakfast cereals and fruit bats and large chu--
MAYNARD: Skip a bit, Brother.
SECOND BROTHER: And the Lord spake, saying, "First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then, shalt thou count to three. No more, no less. Three shalt be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, nor either count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then, lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in My sight, shall snuff it."
MAYNARD: Amen.
KNIGHTS: Amen.
ARTHUR: Right! One! Two! Five!
GALAHAD: Three, sir.
ARTHUR: Three!
[angels sing]
[boom]
Why is it that the world never remembered the name of Johann Gambolputty de von Ausfern Schplenden Schlitter Crasscrenbon Fried Digger Dingle Dangle Dongle Dungle Burstein von Knacker Thrasher Apple Banger Horowitz Ticolensic Grander Knotty Spelltinkle Grandlich Grumblemeyer Spelterwasser Kurstlich Himbleeisen Bahnwagen Gutenabend Bitte ein Nürnburger Bratwurstle Gerspurten Mitz Weimache Luber Hundsfut Gumberaber Shönedanker Kalbsfleisch Mittler Aucher von Hautkopft of Ulm?
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bachophile
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HOLY CARP!!!
Here's a bonus for choosing this executive version of the Holy Grail script:

The Castle Aaaagh can be found in Loch Linnhe, at the mouth of Loch Laich,
to the south of Fort William, Scotland. It sits on a small islet just
offshore to the west of the main road at Portnacroish. (It looks exactly
as it does in the movie!) You can visit it (Castle Stalker) April-September
for 4.50 pounds. For reservations, please call 08832-3944.
"I don't know much about classical music. For years I thought the Goldberg Variations were something Mr. and Mrs. Goldberg did on their wedding night." Woody Allen
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Luke's Dad
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Emperor Pengin
Damn that Netflix! They sent the wrong movie! It was some old Black and White british film about a dentist, or toothpaste or something. I turned it off in the middle of the opening credits, put it back in the envelope and mailed it back. Along with a very strongly worded letter!

:veryangry:
The problem with having an open mind is that people keep trying to put things in it.
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The 89th Key
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Same thing happened to me LD. I bought a DVD from Best Buy and even though it had the right packaging and DVD label on it, when I started it...after 2 min I had to turn it off and return it. What are the odds!
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George K
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Finally
George K
Nov 25 2006, 06:29 PM
I fart in your general direction!

Posted Image
A guide to GKSR: Click

"Now look here, you Baltic gas passer... "
- Mik, 6/14/08


Nothing is as effective as homeopathy.

I'd rather listen to an hour of Abba than an hour of The Beatles.
- Klaus, 4/29/18
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bachophile
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HOLY CARP!!!
Posted Image

Don't like her?! What's wrong with her?! She's beautiful. She's rich. She's got huge... tracts o' land!
"I don't know much about classical music. For years I thought the Goldberg Variations were something Mr. and Mrs. Goldberg did on their wedding night." Woody Allen
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OperaTenor
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Pisa-Carp
I'd like to go for a walk.



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TomK
HOLY CARP!!!
bachophile
Nov 27 2006, 04:26 PM
Posted Image

Don't like her?!  What's wrong with her?!  She's beautiful.  She's rich.  She's got huge... tracts o' land!

bach and I don't agree on much but on this subject we're both Irish.....or Scottish or whatever that tartin is....
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Dewey
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HOLY CARP!!!
Looks more like a stretchin to me.
"By nature, i prefer brevity." - John Calvin, Institutes of the Christian Religion, p. 685.

"Never waste your time trying to explain yourself to people who are committed to misunderstanding you." - Anonymous

"Oh sure, every once in a while a turd floated by, but other than that it was just fine." - Joe A., 2011

I'll answer your other comments later, but my primary priority for the rest of the evening is to get drunk." - Klaus, 12/31/14
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