| Welcome to The New Coffee Room. We hope you enjoy your visit. You're currently viewing our forum as a guest. This means you are limited to certain areas of the board and there are some features you can't use. If you join our community, you'll be able to access member-only sections, and use many member-only features such as customizing your profile, sending personal messages, and voting in polls. Registration is simple, fast, and completely free. Join our community! If you're already a member please log in to your account to access all of our features: |
- Pages:
- 1
- 2
| Hey Buddy, can you spare a sperm?; her biological clock is ticking.... | |
|---|---|
| Tweet Topic Started: Jul 26 2005, 01:49 PM (599 Views) | |
| Jolly | Jul 26 2005, 01:49 PM Post #1 |
![]()
Geaux Tigers!
|
I'm sorry, but this is silly: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/8284173/ |
| The main obstacle to a stable and just world order is the United States.- George Soros | |
![]() |
|
| The 89th Key | Jul 26 2005, 01:55 PM Post #2 |
|
It's sad. On so many levels. |
![]() |
|
| dolmansaxlil | Jul 26 2005, 02:03 PM Post #3 |
![]()
HOLY CARP!!!
|
Sorry, guys. I fail to see the problem. I'd personally rather see a single mother make that decision consciously because she really WANTS kids then see the people who end up having more kids than they can handle because they haven't figured out how birth control works. |
|
"Your first 10,000 photographs are your worst." ~ Henri Cartier-Bresson My Flickr Photostream | |
![]() |
|
| The 89th Key | Jul 26 2005, 02:08 PM Post #4 |
|
Dol, I think everyone would rather see that. Unfortunately, we aren't talking about the comparison between those two situations. We're talking about a woman with no husband, deciding to have kids on her own just because she wants them. She's not saving life or destroying life...it's a woman creating life and bringing children into the world without a father. There's no point to "risk" such a situation. |
![]() |
|
| dolmansaxlil | Jul 26 2005, 02:15 PM Post #5 |
![]()
HOLY CARP!!!
|
Is a single parent household ideal? No. It's not. It's certainly not the end of the world, though. A stable, single parent home where the kids are raised with that as "normal", and where they know how much they were wanted and hoped for by the very nature of their conception is a FAR better situation than what a lot of kids are raised in - and that includes a lot of two parent homes. Yeah, if the world were perfect, every child would be raised in a stable home with two loving parents who have enough money to treat them right, BOTH parents would have jobs that mean they can spend oodles of time with the kids, and they would be surrounded by loving and supportive extended family, etc etc. But the truth is, NO family is perfect. No situation is ideal. These kids are very likely going to be loved and well cared for. What more could you want? |
|
"Your first 10,000 photographs are your worst." ~ Henri Cartier-Bresson My Flickr Photostream | |
![]() |
|
| The 89th Key | Jul 26 2005, 02:22 PM Post #6 |
|
Again, I'm not comparing this with current social situations regarding bad homes...and how this might be a good home for children. I think we should strive for the ideal. It doesn't always happen, but I disagree with this woman bringing kids into a world without a father. What if something happens to her? Bam, more kids into the "system". What she is doing is unnecessary, selfish, and risky. I also disagree with her not having kids with her husband. I think a woman should become pregnant when she's in a stable marriage with her husband. Anything else is wrong, IMO. Good discussion though dol, never really thought about this issue much. |
![]() |
|
| dolmansaxlil | Jul 26 2005, 02:29 PM Post #7 |
![]()
HOLY CARP!!!
|
How do you know these kids would be "alone" if something happened to her? You're making an assumption that she doesn't have other family that she's close to and that the kids will be close to. I wouldn't expect us to agree on this one, 89th. You're against sex outside of marriage and single parent families. Guess what? Guilty of both. And absolutely unrepentant. I guess that's why I don't see this loving mother raising two children she desperately wanted as all that horrifying. |
|
"Your first 10,000 photographs are your worst." ~ Henri Cartier-Bresson My Flickr Photostream | |
![]() |
|
| dolmansaxlil | Jul 26 2005, 02:36 PM Post #8 |
![]()
HOLY CARP!!!
|
Actually, 89th, I have a question. Let's say for a moment that a woman's husband dies while she is pregnant with his child. She has the kid and raises that child alone. How is that situation any different for the child? Good intentions? |
|
"Your first 10,000 photographs are your worst." ~ Henri Cartier-Bresson My Flickr Photostream | |
![]() |
|
| The 89th Key | Jul 26 2005, 03:25 PM Post #9 |
|
Well don't get me wrong, I'm just saying my opinion, not trying to insult anyone. And you're right, I am against sex outside of marriage. ANYTHING else is wrong, IMO. |
![]() |
|
| The 89th Key | Jul 26 2005, 03:30 PM Post #10 |
|
In that situation, you go from the ideal situation to a forced situation, when raising the child. The woman in this story is taking a forced situation and making it an optional situation. You play the cards you are dealt, and not the ones you make up. This woman is essentially saying "blindfold me and inseminate me some random guy's sperm". Then again this all stems from my belief that only a married man and woman should birth a child. |
![]() |
|
| AlbertaCrude | Jul 26 2005, 03:35 PM Post #11 |
|
Bull-Carp
|
Its up to the woman. End of story. |
![]() |
|
| The 89th Key | Jul 26 2005, 03:37 PM Post #12 |
|
Of course it is. And my opinion is up to me!
|
![]() |
|
| AlbertaCrude | Jul 26 2005, 03:41 PM Post #13 |
|
Bull-Carp
|
I respect your opinion. End of my story. |
![]() |
|
| dolmansaxlil | Jul 26 2005, 05:00 PM Post #14 |
![]()
HOLY CARP!!!
|
Well hot damn, AC! We just agreed on something! The following quotes are all 89th.
Oh I'm not insulted. If I'm insulted, you'll know it. Just acknowledging that our personal feelings on the surrounding issues are so far apart we're unlikely to agree.
That's just fine by me. As long as you don't try to tell me that's how I have to live my life I'm all good. You go ahead and deprive yourself of all the pleasure you like.
I'd argue that they're all made up. What about the woman who gets pregnant and then her husband starts beating her up? (The numbers of husbands who never laid a hand on the wife until she gets pregnant are startlingly high). She decides to leave him. She's made that decision, as well. On the same note, the woman in teh video could very likely find a guy and get married just because she wanted to have kids. Sure, she might not love him. Sure, their relationship might not be great. But hey, then at least she'd be married.
Just out of curiousity, how do you feel about artificial insemination (using donor sperm) in cases where a married couple is unable to have children? |
|
"Your first 10,000 photographs are your worst." ~ Henri Cartier-Bresson My Flickr Photostream | |
![]() |
|
| The 89th Key | Jul 27 2005, 03:18 AM Post #15 |
|
Fair enough. ![]()
I'm pretty sure the reason I'm waiting till marriage isn't because I'm a masochist. Hmm, not the best word to describe...but you know what I mean! ![]()
Yes, but she's forced into that decision. This lady was not.
Better than having some random guy's children and raising multiple kids on your own from the start, just so you can have kids. Whether we like it or not, she's putting herself in a MUCH harder position, just so that SHE can have kids. You have to remember that there are real kids involved here, and she's not saving their life, adopting them, or anything....she's literally creating them, and bringing them into the world with a much harder situation, etc.
Well it's kinda like my view on abortion. I'd rather have abortion criminalized after 3 months instead of 6, but ideally I'd rather have no abortion at all. So here, I'd rather them not have kids unless they're their own, but if anything I'd rather have a married and stable couple have kids via artificial insemination as opposed to a single mom having 3+ kids on her own. |
![]() |
|
| The 89th Key | Jul 27 2005, 03:26 AM Post #16 |
|
I mean, basically I'm always going to support the ideal situation if there's an option. Of course harder situations might come up and you deal with it accordingly...but if one has a choice, I'll always go on the record as supporting the ideal. This lady here has an option, and she's choosing to bring three kids into the world in a hard(er) situation...which I think is reckless and selfish. |
![]() |
|
| Mikhailoh | Jul 27 2005, 03:35 AM Post #17 |
|
If you want trouble, find yourself a redhead
|
89th.. how old are you and I presume you don't have kids? I'm going to tell you something, and I mean it in the kindest way imaginable. You are a very bright, if somewhat rigid of thought, young man. But parenthood is not something where, IMO, your opinion carries any weight. From your vantage point in life I seriously doubt you can imagine the changes that are gong to come in both your inner and outer lives as you get a bit further down the road. You certainly cannot imagine what a change to your entire viewpoint on your existence and your relationship to the rest of the world parenthood will bring. Once you have children you will see their strength and resilience, and the immense joy they bring. Having seen that, I think you would see this woman in a very different light, and I doubt you would consider denying her the chance to experience that and to be a good parent. |
|
Once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead - Lucille Ball | |
![]() |
|
| The 89th Key | Jul 27 2005, 03:40 AM Post #18 |
|
I appreciate your post Mik, and I figured I'd be a heavy minority in this thread. Whether this is applicable to this debate or not...I find the best decision is one made while not in the heat of the moment, AKA older and wanting kids desperately ...as opposed to me who doesn't want kids right now and *might* be able to make a better decision because I have a more rational thought process, ya know? Again, whether that's applicable to this situation is up to you; but I think it is. |
![]() |
|
| Mikhailoh | Jul 27 2005, 05:29 AM Post #19 |
|
If you want trouble, find yourself a redhead
|
Um... I think you better come down a little off that high horse, guy. This woman is a CEO. Such folks are largely known for good decision making ability. I've known women who have struggled with this very issue, and I assure you it is not done lightly or 'in the heat of the moment'. Beside that point, I am unclear as to what decision you can make here? |
|
Once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead - Lucille Ball | |
![]() |
|
| The 89th Key | Jul 27 2005, 06:15 AM Post #20 |
|
My point was that if it were up to my decision...looking at her current situation, I wouldn't recommend it, for the various reasons I've already mentioned in this thread. She's a working woman, single, and is going to have 3 or more kids from some random guy's sperm, who will grow up fatherless. I know those aren't always bad situations, but it's reckless and irresponsible on her part for doing it deliberately. |
![]() |
|
| Jolly | Jul 27 2005, 06:39 AM Post #21 |
![]()
Geaux Tigers!
|
I'm sorry, but this is the classic "I want it all" syndrome. I want a hot career, and I want to get to the top, and when I get there, well, I'll just get pregnant if possible by random donor. So I'm somewhat opposed to this on several levels... 1. The single parent issue. I don't think it takes a village to raise a child, but I durn sure believe it takes two parents. That is not saying that a single parent cannot do the job, many do. But when considering the population at large, many of the problems kids have today stem directly from single parent homes. Even those populated by people who make pretty good money. 2. There is a reason God let young folks have babies...it's because they have the energy to chase after them! I know how my tail drags the ground sometimes, I'd hate to think I had to meet the needs of a baby, or a toddler, 24/7, at this age. Especially by myself. 3. If one has to have a child that badly, why not adopt? Lots of kids out there who need a home. Lots of kids. 4. Early demise. Someone pointed out that this woman might die at an earlier age than most parents, and the rebuttal was that we are essentially all mortal, and could expire at any time. That is true. However, the older you are, the higher the deck is stacked in favor of the house. At 24, you're chances of living to 70 are better than your chances at 50, or at least I think that is the case. 5. Lastly, just too much long black tube technology for me. We inseminate cows. I thought we'd be a bit above herd genetics when it came to humans. |
| The main obstacle to a stable and just world order is the United States.- George Soros | |
![]() |
|
| ivorythumper | Jul 27 2005, 08:53 AM Post #22 |
|
I am so adjective that I verb nouns!
|
Seems to me it might be another typical case of "I can't find anyone who will love me, so I'll have a baby who will love me unconditionally." Happens all the time. |
| The dogma lives loudly within me. | |
![]() |
|
| QuirtEvans | Jul 28 2005, 05:32 AM Post #23 |
|
I Owe It All To John D'Oh
|
Well said. I was just having this discussion with some friends last night. Parenthood changes you in ways neither you nor any of your friends could have expected.
My initial instinct is that you're right, Thump. However, don't discount how strong the need to reproduce is in some women. You might say it's a psychological drive for unconditional love, but I think there's also a very strong biological urge involved as well. It's sad how many teenage girls in bad situations want a baby because they want someone who will love them unconditionally, though. |
| It would be unwise to underestimate what large groups of ill-informed people acting together can achieve. -- John D'Oh, January 14, 2010. | |
![]() |
|
| AlbertaCrude | Jul 28 2005, 07:33 AM Post #24 |
|
Bull-Carp
|
Excellent question Dol and one that apparently, I am certain, raises a few ethical questions for some people. Sometimes the guy's fish don't swim the right direction, tread water or are just plain *ugly* and therefore need to be cleaned up. At othertiomes there's physiological problems with the woman that prevent ovulation etc. There are also those cases that are medically unexplained and tapping into modern medical technology is the solution. Personally I see nothing ethically wrong with this whatsoever given the couple's predicament. You do what you have to do. |
![]() |
|
| ivorythumper | Jul 28 2005, 07:52 AM Post #25 |
|
I am so adjective that I verb nouns!
|
There are alternatives to artificial insemination. A doctor up in Omaha, Thomas Hilgers, has a center for Naprotechnology that has helped thousands of "infertile" couples achieve viable pregnancies through entirely natural means. He is perhaps the world's foremost expert on pregnancy and the woman's menstrual cycle, having charted some 15,000 cycles with regard to hormonal shifts, chemical balances in the uterus and blood stream, etc. He does not use in vitro, but rather employs much more sophisticated (and, for some, ethical) procedures such as targeted hormone surveys, anti-adhesion strategies, laser and micro surgical applications, etc. This is guy who has literally written THE BOOK on the topic. |
| The dogma lives loudly within me. | |
![]() |
|
| Go to Next Page | |
| « Previous Topic · The New Coffee Room · Next Topic » |
- Pages:
- 1
- 2











4:12 PM Jul 10