Welcome Guest [Log In] [Register]
Welcome to The New Coffee Room. We hope you enjoy your visit.


You're currently viewing our forum as a guest. This means you are limited to certain areas of the board and there are some features you can't use. If you join our community, you'll be able to access member-only sections, and use many member-only features such as customizing your profile, sending personal messages, and voting in polls. Registration is simple, fast, and completely free.


Join our community!


If you're already a member please log in to your account to access all of our features:

Username:   Password:
Add Reply
Bell ringers; a bad joke
Topic Started: Jun 27 2005, 04:01 AM (152 Views)
dolmansaxlil
Member Avatar
HOLY CARP!!!
My uncle John was in the fertilized egg business when I was
young. He had several hundred young layers, called pullets, and 8
or 10 roosters whose job was to fertilize the eggs. My uncle kept
records and any rooster or pullet that didn't perform well went
into the pot and was replaced.

Now this took an awful lot of time. So when my uncle saw a set of
eight tiny bells that each rang a different tone he promptly
bought them. He glued a piece of foam rubber to each clapper
shaft so the bell wouldn't ring except when violently shaken.

He hung a bell on each rooster's neck and went and mixed a Mint
Julep. Now he could sit on the porch and sip while filling out an
efficiency report on the roosters by listening to the different
tones of the bells and marking down each encounter.

My uncle's favorite rooster was old Brewster. A very fine
specimen he was, but his bell had not rung all morning. Uncle
John went to investigate.

Several roosters were chasing pullets, bells a-ringing. Brewster
had his bell in his beak so it couldn't ring. He'd sneak up on a
pullet, do his job and walk on to the next one.

Uncle was so proud of Brewster he entered him in the county fair.

Brewster was an overnight sensation.

They not only awarded him the No Bell Prize but also the Pullet
Surprise.
"Your first 10,000 photographs are your worst." ~ Henri Cartier-Bresson

My Flickr Photostream


Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Dewey
Member Avatar
HOLY CARP!!!
groan...


well, if ya can't get 'em drunk, at least ya gotta be quiet as you sneak up behind 'em...
"By nature, i prefer brevity." - John Calvin, Institutes of the Christian Religion, p. 685.

"Never waste your time trying to explain yourself to people who are committed to misunderstanding you." - Anonymous

"Oh sure, every once in a while a turd floated by, but other than that it was just fine." - Joe A., 2011

I'll answer your other comments later, but my primary priority for the rest of the evening is to get drunk." - Klaus, 12/31/14
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
« Previous Topic · The New Coffee Room · Next Topic »
Add Reply