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A boiled egg is hard to beat; and other groaners
Topic Started: Jun 13 2005, 08:57 AM (1,958 Views)
kenny
HOLY CARP!!!
1. A bicycle can't stand alone because it is two-tired.

2. What's the definition of a will? A dead giveaway.

3. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

4. A backward poet writes inverse.

5. In democracy it's your vote that counts; In feudalism, it's your count that votes.

7. A chicken crossing the road is . . . poultry in motion.

8. If you don't pay your exorcist you get repossessed.

9. With her marriage she got a new name and “a dress”.

10. Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft and I'll show you A-flat minor.

11. When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.

12. The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.

13. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.

14. You feel stuck with your debt if you can't “budge it”.

15. Local Area Network in Australia is knows as The LAN Down Under.

16. He often broke into song because he couldn't find the key.

17. Every calendar's days are numbered.

18. A lot of money is tainted. 'Taint yours and 'taint mine.

19. A boiled egg is hard to beat.

20. He had a photographic memory which was never developed.

21. A plateau is a high form of flattery.

22. The short fortuneteller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.

23. Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.

24. When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall.

25. Those who jump off a Paris bridge are “in Seine”.

26. When an actress saw her first strands of gray hair she thought she'd dye.

27. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.

28. Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.

29. Acupuncture is a jab well done.
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AlbertaCrude
Bull-Carp
19. A boiled egg is hard to beat.

...it's also hard to putt.
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Fizzygirl
Fulla-Carp
:D :D
Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a purpose. ~ Garrison Keillor


My latest videos.

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rkvs1
Junior Carp
I always liked your sense of humor, Kenny ....
.
.
.
.
.
.
......or at least I've groan accustomed to it.

:)
Bob
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ivorythumper
Member Avatar
I am so adjective that I verb nouns!
Grandma once dated an awning salesman -- she was attracted to shady characters.
The dogma lives loudly within me.
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KlavierBauer
Member Avatar
HOLY CARP!!!
wow
"I realize you want him to touch you all over and give you babies, but his handling of the PR side really did screw the pooch." - Ivory Thumper
"He said sleepily: "Don't worry mom, my dick is like hot logs in the morning." - Apple

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Steve Miller
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Bull-Carp
I call my baby "hinges", 'cuz she's something to a door.
Wag more
Bark less
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apple
one of the angels
Steve Miller
Jun 13 2005, 07:49 PM
I call my baby "hinges", 'cuz she's something to a door.

I don't get it Steve


good contribution Kenny. May I take this opportunity to thank you for all you contribute.. You are a real fine fella.
it behooves me to behold
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KlavierBauer
Member Avatar
HOLY CARP!!!
agreed apple!
"I realize you want him to touch you all over and give you babies, but his handling of the PR side really did screw the pooch." - Ivory Thumper
"He said sleepily: "Don't worry mom, my dick is like hot logs in the morning." - Apple

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ivorythumper
Member Avatar
I am so adjective that I verb nouns!
apple
Jun 14 2005, 08:33 AM
Steve Miller
Jun 13 2005, 07:49 PM
I call my baby "hinges", 'cuz she's something to a door.

I don't get it Steve


good contribution Kenny. May I take this opportunity to thank you for all you contribute.. You are a real fine fella.

something to adore...
The dogma lives loudly within me.
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KlavierBauer
Member Avatar
HOLY CARP!!!
oooh... I think she gets it steve
"I realize you want him to touch you all over and give you babies, but his handling of the PR side really did screw the pooch." - Ivory Thumper
"He said sleepily: "Don't worry mom, my dick is like hot logs in the morning." - Apple

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kenny
HOLY CARP!!!
apple
Jun 14 2005, 08:33 AM
Steve Miller
Jun 13 2005, 07:49 PM
I call my baby "hinges", 'cuz she's something to a door.

I don't get it Steve


good contribution Kenny. May I take this opportunity to thank you for all you contribute.. You are a real fine fella.

Why do I feel like I am reading my obit?
Someone else said something nice about me recently.
I don't like this.

I better start talking about my hybrid, or something else annoying.
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ivorythumper
Member Avatar
I am so adjective that I verb nouns!
KlavierBauer
Jun 14 2005, 08:40 AM
oooh... I think she gets it steve

:doh:
too dry for me.
The dogma lives loudly within me.
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pianojerome
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HOLY CARP!!!
:lol:
Sam
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Kincaid
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HOLY CARP!!!
Just bumping this so I can find it tomorrow to show to my wife. My apologies.
Kincaid - disgusted Republican Partisan since 2006.
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