Welcome Guest [Log In] [Register]
Welcome to Survival of the Fittest, a RPing board loosely based off of Koshun Takami's Battle Royale, with its own unique plot and spin on the 'deadly game'. We've been around quite a while, and are now in our thirteenth year, so don't worry about us going anywhere any time soon!

If you're a newcomer and interested in joining, then please make sure you check out the rules. You may also want to read the FAQ, introduce yourself and stop by the chat to meet some of our members. If you're still not quite sure where to start, then we have a great New Member's Guide with a lot of useful information about getting going. Don't hesitate to PM a member of staff (they have purple usernames) if you have any questions about SOTF and how to get started!

Let the games begin!

Username:   Password:
Locked Topic
Claudeson Bademosi; Bless you, sir.
Topic Started: Mar 21 2018, 02:40 PM (236 Views)
I'm a Cactus
Member Avatar
do you want to go to war, balakay?
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
Name: Claudeson Bademosi
Gender: Male
Age: Seventeen
Grade: Senior [12th]
School: George Hunter High School
Hobbies and Interests: Theology, volunteering in the community, school band, jogging.

Appearance: Standing at 6'0" and weighing 185 lbs, Claudeson is a sturdy individual, with his thick frame being a mix of natural musculature and a large bone structure. While not overly muscled, Claudeson is thick, by every definition of the word. He has large hands, large feet, and thick limbs that would allow him to excel at sports, were he so interested. This is not the case, and so his natural body fat tends to sit around the 12 - 18% range, not enough for him to be considered overweight, but enough for him to lack much definition.

Like the rest of him, Claudeson's head and face are well-proportioned to match his body and easily illustrate his Nigerian descent. His head is taller than it is thick, but is framed and widened by the thick black dreadlocks that he wears, which fall down to just below his shoulders. His brown eyes are spaced equidistantly apart from one another, and the whites of his eyes contrast with his dark mahogany skin tone, leaving them to stand out on his face. His nose is not overly large, but is wide, having a slight protrusion which avoids anyone from referring to it as flat. The corners of his mouth are constantly up-turned, and his natural resting expression is that of a smile, his white teeth often catching the eyes of the people he's conversing with. Claudeson has well-defined jaw and a squared chin, and has been said to have kind, open features.

As far as fashion is concerned, Claudeson tends to dress conservatively, not being a big proponent of displaying logos or sayings on his clothing. He dresses more for function rather than fashion, and favours bright colours and whites over darker shades. As he is constantly on the go and always walking around places, he is usually found in a light brown pair of hiking boots that he is very particular about.

On the day of the abduction, Claudeson was wearing a white t-shirt tucked in to a pair of black jeans. Overtop of the t-shirt, he was wearing a button-down shirt with a light blue and light green gridlock pattern that he left unbuttoned. He had his light brown boots on, as well as a silver watch. Around his neck, Claudeson wears a small gold cross on a golden chain that he can easily gain access to if need be.

Biography: Born on September 13, 2000 to Ifechukwu and Abeo Bademosi, Claudeson was born into a house in which love and worship were abundant. Having met as teenagers in their local Protestant church in their native Nigeria, both Ifechukwu and Abeo quickly found themselves connected by a mutual devotion to the Lord, as well as a strong sense of attraction to one another. Wanting to pursue a career in service, the young couple quickly married and moved to the United States, where they both enrolled at Syracuse University, in Syracuse, New York. Initially the young couple struggled to make ends meet while both pursuing religious education, but Ifechukwu knew that she had more of a chance to become a full-fledged pastor in the United States than she did in her native Nigeria. They missed their families and often struggled simply to pay the bills, but eventually managed to complete their education. Abeo did very well in his studies but Ifechukwu excelled, being a passionate speaker and able to connect well with a variety of people around her. As a result, when the two graduated, Abeo wasn't surprised when it was his wife that ended up finding a placement first - and so the couple moved from New York to Chattanooga, Tennessee.

Claudeson's conception was accidental, as Ifechukwu and Abeo probably couldn't have picked a more inopportune time to have a child, but the other pastors were surprisingly supportive. Ifechukwu continued to preach throughout her pregnancy until the September when Claudeson was born. They never saw him as an accident, but rather a gift, and while the young family were never totally at ease financially, there was always a sense of togetherness and community in their life which made them feel blessed.

As a child, Claudeson was rambunctious and happy, but never a handful for his parents. In a bit of an unusual role reversal, Abeo found himself being a stay-at-home father, a role that he took to more and more as the time stretched on. With his mother constantly out and about doing work for the church, Claudeson would spend all of his time around his father, listening to readings from various passages within the Bible, and doing a lot of classic father-son bonding activities more so than many other children were able. This role reversal led to his mother being the disciplinarian in the family, as she was the primary breadwinner and he often saw his father as more of his buddy than he did as a dad.

Socially, Claudeson was always more than capable of fitting in with the children around him. His teachers were struck by his almost unnatural kindness that he possessed, as well as his ability to listen to those around him. Even as a young man, Claude, as the teachers began to call him, had a natural charisma, and other people gravitated towards him. As he made his way through pre-school and elementary school, Claude was always a favourable presence in any room. While his family did not come from money, his mother's presence within the religious community gave him a sense of belonging, even amidst the more wealthy populace in Chattanooga.

Somewhat naturally for Claude, he attended both public school and Sunday school, and eventually became proficient enough that he was able to start teaching the younger children. This job gave Claude a bit more of a warmer relationship with his mother, as she was very proud that her son was growing up and would likely follow within the footsteps of her and her husband. Claude proved himself to be a capable teacher, as his apt way of dealing with children mixed with his charisma left most of the kids enjoying their time learning about the Bible. Spending more time with his mother at the church allowed him to interact more with the other pastors and adults, and Claudeson's social acumen increased even more, along with increasing his mother's pride and relationship with her son.

As Claude continued to grow, his confidence increased and he found himself becoming comfortable in a myriad of different situations, both social and academic. His teachers generally enjoyed his contributions in class, and his peers looked at him almost as the class conscience. Claude often joined his friends in any kind of social endeavour, but would be the voice of reason in many different situations, dissuading his peers from acting out or doing things that were a bit more reckless. It often made the times where Claude really did let loose mean more to his peers, and he was seen as an integral part of his social circle.

High school presented a brand new set of opportunities for the naturally optimistic Claudeson. As part of their graduation requirement, each high school student was required to take a certain elective course. Claude picked one that focused upon community outreach work, which had a volunteer hour requirement. Claude found himself working at the local homeless shelter, and found that he derived a great deal of pleasure out of helping the less fortunate. He completed all of his hours, and found himself taking on more responsibility there, and finally, mid-way through his grade ten year, they hired him on as a part-time employee. He works many of the community functions, does paperwork on the weekends, and will work in the kitchen on some evenings. The men and women in the shelter like Claudeson, as he is an excellent listener and, as ever, is kind.

Relationships have never really been on the forefront of Claude's mind. While he absolutely notices and enjoys the more aesthetically pleasing members of the opposite sex, he has never been much into dating, as he prefers to put more of his time into his volunteer and church activities. There have undoubtedly been members of the student body who find Claude attractive, but he has never so much as expressed any kind of interest in dating anyone, perhaps from the occasional compliment on someone's appearance or clothing - phrased as politely as possible.

Unlike many teenagers, Claudeson is very polite and self-assured when in conversation with those around him. He does not swear or use inappropriate language, and he always prefers to shake hands with people when meeting them. He has a very good and sometimes even jovial nature, and possesses a distinctive warm laugh. Adults are often impressed that he keeps eye contact when speaking with people, and most believe that he will undoubtedly follow within his mother's footsteps, and perhaps even surpass her.

For the last six months, starting the summer prior to senior year, Claudeson has been privately suffering from an undiagnosed case of depression. On occasion, he will have trouble sleeping, and thoughts of loneliness and uncertainty have started to more regularly permeate his thoughts as graduation approaches. As a good student who attains mostly A's and B's, Claude figures to have his choice of colleges to attend, but is starting to doubt the path that he's always believed that he was on. Instead of seeing a proverbial light at the end of the high school tunnel, Claude has been seeing the approaching change as something of a darkness. He has been hiding this darkness from his peers and from his parents, only confessing to God, partially ashamed at his uncertainty and partially angry at himself for feeling that way. In recent months prior to the trip, Claude has sometimes woken up in the night in tears with an overwhelming feeling of despair. He has taken to trying to go for a jog to combat these feelings, which is only serving as a short-term fix. As he is embarrassed of his emotionality, he hides it deep within himself, not allowing anyone a glimpse of how he is feeling at a given moment. He believes that everyone is used to seeing him as a strong, happy figure, and to betray that wouldn't be fair to everyone else.

A side effect of his depression is the fact that for the first time in his life, Claudeson has recently begun to question his faith. He has for months, prayed to God for salvation and for better feelings, but has continued to slowly slip down a dark path. As his moods continue to swing and his feelings become harder and harder to bottle up, he is beginning to wonder why his prayers are being unanswered, or if they are even going to anyone at all. This has caused him to feel uncertain and anxious about the approaching end of high school, as he is questioning the very foundations that he has based his life upon. Faced with the possibility that he could have been wrong about his religion and his devotion to God, Claude has started to question what other facets of his life could simply be a social construct and whether or not he is truly happy with the person that he has been groomed to be, by his church, his peers, and his family.

Since he has taken up jogging as a way to combat his depression, Claude's physical stamina has had a slight uptick and he does feel as though he's walking around with more energy at times. Since the Chattanooga area has a lot of nature trails and woodland areas within it, Claude enjoys taking in the scenery, as it calms him down and makes him feel a little bit more stable about the world around him. When he returns to daily life, however, he starts to feel a bit of a rut once more.

Aside from his volunteer work and his activities in the church, Claudeson plays in the school band, having selected the trombone as his instrument in elementary school and keeping with it throughout. He enjoys the camraderie that being in the band allows him, and he believes that music is one of the purest forms of expression, as it transcends religious and cultural bounds, and can be enjoyed by anyone in the world, regardless of language or understanding level. He finds music to be profoundly beautiful.

Advantages: Claudeson is well built and is stronger than he should be for his general lack of physical activity. As he is constantly on the go, he has good cardiovascular strength. He is very socially apt and has a reputation for kindness. He is a confident speaker and should have no issue navigating difficult social situations.
Disadvantages: Currently he is waging an incredibly difficult internal battle with mental illness that he has not disclosed to anyone. This causes him to try and suppress his negative feelings, which could lead to an implosion - or an explosion. He is currently struggling with his faith, which if challenged could lead to a mental breakdown of his principles.
Edited by I'm a Cactus, Apr 9 2018, 12:42 PM.
---
The Future

The Past

Meanwhile...
Offline Profile Goto Top
 
backslash
Member Avatar
Who is this sassy lost child
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
Hey Cactus! Before Claudeson can be given a critique, please make sure that his profile fully adheres to the template. Specifically, you're missing a line break between the Hobbies and Appearance sections. Thanks!
"Art enriches the community, Steve, no less than a pulsing fire hose, or a fireman beating down a blazing door. So what if we're drawing a nude man? So what if all we ever draw is a nude man, or the same nude man over and over in all sorts of provocative positions? Context, not content! Process, not subject! Don't be so gauche, Steve, it's beneath you."
Characters

Others
Offline Profile Goto Top
 
I'm a Cactus
Member Avatar
do you want to go to war, balakay?
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
Gonna castrate Google docs, i swear.

finito.
---
The Future

The Past

Meanwhile...
Offline Profile Goto Top
 
backslash
Member Avatar
Who is this sassy lost child
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
We meet again, Cactus Man. Claudeson's looking good, but is temporarily DENIED pending some edits.

We've got a skin tone, which is good, but what's Claudeson's actual race/ethnicity?

With his current birthdate, Claudeson would be 17 at the time of the game, not 18.

The first couple paragraphs of the biography are kind of purple. I'd recommend combing through that and adjusting to a more neutral tone.

Did anything notable happen in Claude's life between early school and high school? Right now it seems like there's kind of a jump.

Volunteer service isn't actually required to graduate from George Hunter; however, elective credits are, and some extracurriculars like a service club do require volunteer hours. Just adjust that slightly.

When did Claude first start experiencing depressive episodes? Is there any particular reason why he so dreads the end of high school? Since he has started to doubt whether he wants to pursue a future in religion, is there something else that interests him, or does he just feel lost?

Does he jog often? This could be another hobby if expanded upon.

There's a contradiction in Claudeson's Advantages and Disadvantages:
Quote:
 
Claudeson is well built and is stronger than he should be for his lack of physical activity.

Quote:
 
Does not actively participate in athletics and so does not have any kind of functional strength.

Either he's strong or he isn't. Also, make sure to use full sentences.

The only other grammar issue jumping out at me is that "Bible" should start with a capital letter.

Make those edits and post back here once you're done, and I'll give Claude another look!
"Art enriches the community, Steve, no less than a pulsing fire hose, or a fireman beating down a blazing door. So what if we're drawing a nude man? So what if all we ever draw is a nude man, or the same nude man over and over in all sorts of provocative positions? Context, not content! Process, not subject! Don't be so gauche, Steve, it's beneath you."
Characters

Others
Offline Profile Goto Top
 
I'm a Cactus
Member Avatar
do you want to go to war, balakay?
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
From Z to A, the profile was critiqued, and the corrections were made, this time from A to Z.
---
The Future

The Past

Meanwhile...
Offline Profile Goto Top
 
backslash
Member Avatar
Who is this sassy lost child
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
I think something goofed with your Google Docs again, as you're now missing line breaks between the Hobbies and Appearance sections, and the Appearance and Biography.

Claudeson still needs an ethnicity specified in his appearance section, and as far as I can tell the first two paragraphs of his biography still need to be edited down for tone a bit.

Quote:
 
He is currently struggling with his faith, which if challenged could lead to a mental breakdown of his principles.

I'd like to see this elaborated on in the bio, as right now I don't see an indication that Claudeson is struggling with his morals in addition to his belief.

Post in here again when that's been taken care of, and I'll give him another look!
"Art enriches the community, Steve, no less than a pulsing fire hose, or a fireman beating down a blazing door. So what if we're drawing a nude man? So what if all we ever draw is a nude man, or the same nude man over and over in all sorts of provocative positions? Context, not content! Process, not subject! Don't be so gauche, Steve, it's beneath you."
Characters

Others
Offline Profile Goto Top
 
I'm a Cactus
Member Avatar
do you want to go to war, balakay?
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
The line breaks should be fixed this time as I have repeatedly slammed the keys.

Second appearance paragraph, first sentence I make reference to him being of Nigerian background.

Everything else is touched up!
---
The Future

The Past

Meanwhile...
Offline Profile Goto Top
 
backslash
Member Avatar
Who is this sassy lost child
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
You wend this time.

APPROVED
"Art enriches the community, Steve, no less than a pulsing fire hose, or a fireman beating down a blazing door. So what if we're drawing a nude man? So what if all we ever draw is a nude man, or the same nude man over and over in all sorts of provocative positions? Context, not content! Process, not subject! Don't be so gauche, Steve, it's beneath you."
Characters

Others
Offline Profile Goto Top
 
1 user reading this topic (1 Guest and 0 Anonymous)
« Previous Topic · Approved Characters · Next Topic »
Locked Topic