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Alaina Laurens; Keep your eyes on the stars... You'll never be one.
Topic Started: Feb 4 2018, 06:24 PM (170 Views)
Mallow
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Cannon Fodder
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Name: Alaina Laurens
Gender: Female
Age: 18
Grade: 12th
School: George Hunter High School
Hobbies and Interests: Theater, choir, yoga, jogging, social media, environmental activism, animal rights, parties, drinking

Appearance: Alaina stands at 5'6" and weighs 120 pounds, putting her on the slim side. She has a thin, somewhat toned build from her jogging and yoga regimen and a flat chest. Her skin is fair due to her Irish heritage and general tendency to burn rather than tan. She has a somewhat round, delicate face with lips that are larger than average, but also a sharp jawline. Her eyes are grey-blue and her nose is thin and sloped.

Her hair falls down to her mid-back, with bangs that lie just above her eyebrows. While it is naturally a light-brown, she has currently dyed her hair a platinum blonde. She typically styles it up in a half-up, half-down bun that leaves her bangs intact. Her ears are on the larger side, but she typically makes efforts to hide them under her hair. She sports a piercing on the right side of her nose as well as one in each of her earlobes and a tattoo of a rose on her left shoulder.

Her dress style is sporty and simple. She typically wears a form-fitting t-shirt or sweater with leggings or skirts, adding cardigans in winter, but occasionally changing this style up if she can find something that appeals to her shifting fashion tastes. Generally, she will wear several bracelets, including charm bracelets and rubber bracelets with political messages on them. For footwear, she generally wears comfortable tennis shoes that will color-coordinate with whatever outfit she wears. She typically wears a full face of makeup but attempts a natural look outside of colorful shades of eyeshadow.

On the day of the abduction, Alaina was wearing a short-sleeved black blouse with a pink floral pattern on it, a knee-length black circle skirt, and black and white converse. She had a full face of makeup with a purple eyeshadow. She was also wearing several bracelets on her left wrist; a brown rubber bracelet with smokey the bear saying "PREVENT WILDFIRES" and a red rubber bracelet saying "END ANIMAL TESTING". On her right wrist she wore a classic Lokai bracelet.

Biography: Alaina Laurens' upbringing was an atypical one, born the second child to Kelli and Michael Laurens. Kelli Morrison and Michael had met while both were on their first year of deployment for the Navy Medical Corps in 1994. The two quickly hit it off and began a relationship that resulted in Kelli's pregnancy. Their first daughter, Kaley Laurens, was born January of 1995. While the two had agreed to stay together to raise their first child, there was a strain in the relationship due to both being heavy drinkers to cope with problems. As a result, many nights were spent fighting due to the strain of the Navy, their child, their drinking, and a general notion of unpreparedness for the relationship.

Despite the strain, the two ended their deployment and married in 1994 due to familial pressure, settling down in Charlotte, North Carolina where they had spent the final months of their deployment. The two quickly found jobs performing as surgical technicians in the Carolina Medical Center, earning a modest living and dividing up their schedules to allow for one of them to be available to watch Kaley at all times, with Kelli working mornings and Michael working nights. This lifestyle would continue for four years until the two found themselves expecting once again, despite contraceptives being used. The two, coming from religious backgrounds, opted out of terminating the pregnancy despite neither truly desiring a second child.

Alaina Laurens, born Bryan, was born October 29th, 1999 in the Carolinas Medical Center. Motivated by pressures from Michael's mother to meet her grandchildren and seeking to change their current lifestyle that they found monotonous, the Laurens moved to Chattanooga, Tennessee. Michael and Kelli moved into the same neighborhood in which Michael's mother lived, found jobs as surgical technicians once again, this time in Parkridge East Hospital, and this time both worked full schedules, leaving Bryan and Kaley in the care of Rita Laurens, Michael's mother, during the day, thus allowing money to come in to the family much easier.

Raised as a male from birth, Alaina's childhood was somewhat privileged due to the effort that her parents had put into earning funds for the family, all of her needs and wants were provided for. While showing no abnormal traits up through her childhood, Alaina played well with whatever toys she would be given and regarded herself however she was regarded by others. While she got along well with her grandmother and sister, she only saw her mother and father for roughly two hours a day before falling asleep, and unbeknownst to her at the time, both were frequently inebriated when she was around them for the first several months of her life as the stress of their constant work would bring up their habits once again. Alaina’s grandmother was able to catch on to it becoming an issue once again, and as such confronted them on the issue. Realizing the issue after a heated debate, the two dialed back on their habit. While they would still drink, they kept it mostly in moderation and well out of view of Alaina and Kaley for the next several years. Once she began elementary school, she would stop being raised by her grandmother and her parents would again take time off to allow them to work the same schedule as her schedule for school, allowing them to be around for her after school to spend more time with Alaina and Kaley.

Her elementary years passed by normally, with Alaina doing well in all of her subjects and getting on well with her peers. However, she was notably discomforted with the beginnings of her gendered socialization and despite keeping these thoughts to herself, she found herself wishing to be a girl and being friends with girls more than boys. Despite this, she still identified as male due to being gendered as male and not understanding the concept of gender dysphoria.

In middle school, Alaina found herself increasingly depressed with her gender presentation, but not yet understanding what the cause was, she found herself increasingly playing RPGs and video games as a form of escapism. She found herself becoming friends with people who shared these interests and that would become her primary social group throughout middle school.

In eighth grade, she found her grades falling and found herself losing interest in the RPGs that she had played to escape the depression before. While her older sister was typically one who she was able to confide in when she felt depressed and who she went to for support, as she had recently graduated and moved into college dorms, she found herself with no one she was able to confide in about her issues. Noticing her parents' stocked alcohol cellar, Alaina stole a bottle of wine and began drinking it as an experiment. She found herself enjoying the feeling and would periodically begin stealing from her parents' wine cellar and drinking as coping mechanism for her depression, attempting to drink to a small enough extent that they wouldn't notice. While she was successful over the course of several months, her parents finally noticed the disappearance and had discovered several bottles of wine in Alaina's room while she was at school.

Rather than anger, they instead felt guilt as they had assumed that Alaina had inherited their alcoholism and picked up her habits from them. After a long discussion, she had admitted her intense depression and feelings of wrongness with her gender. They immediately took her to a therapist who correctly diagnosed Alaina with gender dysphoria and informed her parents. While her parents were dissatisfied with the idea due to their own religious backgrounds, as the social climate was becoming more accepting and awareness of transgender issues was being raised, the two consented to beginning Hormone Replacement Therapy for Alaina.

Alaina became much happier and found her depression all but alleviated once starting HRT. However, as she had just begun high school, she was unwilling to come out publicly to her peers, nervous that they wouldn't accept her. As a result, she only confided in her closest friends at the time her true gender identity, and only went by 'Alaina' to them and her family. With the revelation of her gender, her grades improved and she became much happier. Despite this, she still maintained the coping mechanism of alcohol that she had for stressful circumstances but was drinking much less often than before. She wanted to become involved in an activity as she had started to find the video games that she had played for escapism unnecessary. As a result, she joined the drama club, finding herself enjoying acting as she found joy in experiencing the worlds and lives of other people and characters, appreciating the diversity and differences she found from her own life and experiences. After finding herself talented at singing through musical theater, she also joined her school's choir as she found an enjoyment for that venue of performance as well.

In her sophomore year, the physical changes had become clear, and having decided against confiding her truth for the rest of high school, she opted to publicly come out as transgender via social media and officially changed her name and gender. While she was initially nervous, she was delighted to find that she was accepted by many people and that the change was relatively simple for many of her peers.

Following her coming out, Alaina desired an image change from the somewhat nerdy view that people had of her from middle school. Alaina became much more socially involved and active on social media, and she also made an effort to make friends with those in the popular crowd and party scene. She also began a jogging and yoga regimen to keep herself in shape and to further distance herself from the nerdy image that she saw herself as having.

In the latter half of her sophomore year as well as the following summer, she had began distancing herself from her friend group that she had maintained from middle school, as she did not like associating with people that reminded her of her days as a male, opting instead to move forward with her friends in choir, theater, and her newfound friends following her coming out. Having maintained her drinking habits throughout high school, she had become much more social with them at this point and began going to parties frequently and also experimenting with other drugs such as marijuana and Xanax. This caused her to gain a reputation throughout her school as somewhat trashy. While she was distressed by a portion of her class viewing her negatively, she found that she enjoyed the attention people gave her and the feelings of popularity that she gained from it, finding these feelings to be very validating to her as she was able to shed the wallflower tendencies that she had developed to cope with her depression. As such, she found herself constantly socializing and going out, enjoying having people pay attention to her in such a way, finding that being around people and having people like her further resolved and dismissed her previous feelings of being an outsider. This has caused her to become emotionally dependant on other people for validation.

Her junior and senior years of high school continued the trends started the previous year. As such, she found her grades starting to fall once again due to the frequent partying and lack of time spent studying, causing her grades to mostly fall to C's or D's with A's in her elective classes such as theater and choir. While she was somewhat stressed about this, she found herself much preferring to think about the upcoming party or hanging out with her friends rather than worrying about the far future when her grades would catch up to her. Alaina’s teachers, worried about the drop in her grades when compared to her strong academic prowess, contacted her parents to inform them of the recent decline of her grades. Her parents were worried about her grades and her frequent going-out, but whenever questioned she was always able to assure them that she would do better in the future at which point she would briefly manage to raise her grades before they again dropped.

With her increasing attention to her social position and social media, Alaina decided to become more involved with her image and more socially aware. As such she became involved with activism for animals and the environment, frequently posting about it on social media and wearing accessories to show her devotion to these topics, even going vegan to promote animal rights and environmentalism. As well as this, she had attempted to maintain a friendly and energetic disposition with most people to stay in their good graces and promote a likeable image for herself. Despite this, she frequently engages in gossip with her more popular friends to maintain her status with them, causing her to develop a reputation as fake with many people which has caused many people to distrust her. However, due to her wide social circle, popular friends, and outgoing personality, her overall social position is very comfortable despite many people’s wariness of her.

While Alaina is outwardly very confident and comfortable in her gender expression, she is shaken somewhat easily by criticism and harassment, though she generally internalizes it rather than expressing it outwardly.

Her frequent partying and going out has caused a distant relationship and many fights with her family, though she still manages to generally stay in their good graces by telling them what she thinks they want to hear. They still financially support her and her transition but they do so reluctantly, having to be greatly persuaded by her every time she asks for money. While she's somewhat sad about her relationship with her family, she does nothing to alleviate it and places the blame for the tension more on them then herself. Her relationship with her sister, while still firmly supportive and positive, has become much less close since Kaley is rarely around due to currently being busy with working causing the two to rarely interact.

Following high school, Alaina has ambitions to continue her passion for theater in college. Due to her slacking off academically in her junior and senior year, she finds herself having to apply for schools with higher acceptance rates than she would like due to, hoping that her extracurriculars will give her the boost she needs for acceptance.

Advantages: Alaina is a skilled actress, and may be able to use these skills to her advantage in securing allies and lying in situations where that is a necessity. She has a decent amount of stamina from her jogging and yoga regimen that could allow her to outrun a threat. Alaina is well-known around the school, allowing her to have an easier time meeting people to ally with.
Disadvantages: She has very poor long-term planning abilities which may lead to her making decisions that are detrimental to her in the long run. She also has poor stress-control and tends to bottle up emotions which may lead to acting impulsively. She is very needy for attention and companionship which could allow her to be manipulated easily. Her negative reputation with certain people may cause others to distrust her.
Edited by Mallow, Feb 13 2018, 03:33 PM.
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Mr. Danya
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Hi Mallow! Alaina's a great start, but DENIED for the moment pending some minor edits and a few points of elaboration.


Name: Alaina Laurens
Gender: Female
Age: 18
Grade: 12th
School: George Hunter High School
Hobbies and Interests: Theater, choir, yoga, jogging, social media, environmental activism, animal rights, parties, drinking

Appearance: Alaina stands at 5'6" and weighs 120 pounds, putting her on the slim side. She has a thin, somewhat toned build from her jogging and yoga regimen and a flat chest. Her skin is fair due to her Irish heritage and rather infrequent exposure to the sun. Wouldn't she go outdoors for jogging, at the very least? She has a somewhat round, delicate face with a voluptuous This is a bit poetic for a profile, I’d prefer a different adjective. mouth, but also a sharp jawline. Her eyes are grey-blue and her nose is thin and sloped.

Her hair falls down to her mid-back, with bangs that lie just above her eyebrows. While it is naturally a light-brown, she has currently dyed her hair a platinum blonde. She typically styles it up in a half-up, half-down bun that leaves her bangs intact. Her ears are on the larger side, but she typically makes efforts to hide them under her hair. She sports a piercing on the right side of her nose as well as one in each of her earlobes and a tattoo of a rose on her left shoulder.

Her dress style is sporty and simple. She typically wears a form-fitting t-shirt or sweater with leggings or skirts, adding cardigans in winter, but occasionally changing this style up if she can find something that appeals to her shifting fashion tastes. Generally, she will wear several bracelets, including charm bracelets and rubber bracelets with political messages on them. She typically wears a full face of makeup but attempts a natural look outside of colorful shades of eyeshadow. Just for completeness, can we get a mention of her usual choice of footwear?

On the day of the abduction, Alaina was wearing a short-sleeved black blouse with a pink floral pattern on it, a knee-length black circle skirt, and black and white converse. She had a full face of makeup with a purple eyeshadow. She was also wearing several bracelets on her left wrist; a brown rubber bracelet with smokey the bear saying "PREVENT WILDFIRES" and a red rubber bracelet saying "END ANIMAL TESTING". On her right wrist she wore a classic Lokai bracelet.

Biography: Alaina Laurens' upbringing was an atypical one, born the second child to Kelli and Michael Laurens. Kelli Morrison and Michael had met while both were on their first year of deployment for the Navy Medical Corps in 1994. The two quickly hit it off and began a relationship that resulted in Kelli's pregnancy. Their first daughter, Kaley Laurens, was born January of 1995. While the two had agreed to stay together to raise their first child, there was a strain in the relationship due to both being heavy drinkers to cope with problems. As a result, many nights were spent fighting due to the strain of the Navy, their child, their drinking, and a general notion of unpreparedness for the relationship.

Despite the strain, the two ended their deployment and married in 1994 due to familial pressure, settling down in Charlotte, North Carolina where they had spent the final months of their deployment. The two quickly found jobs performing as surgical technicians in the Carolina Medical Center, earning a modest living and dividing up their schedules to allow for one of them to be available to watch Kaley at all times, with Kelli working mornings and Michael working nights. This lifestyle would continue for four years until the two found themselves expecting once again, despite contraceptives being used. The two, coming from religious backgrounds opted, out of terminating the pregnancy despite neither truly desiring a second child.

Alaina Laurens, born Bryan, was born October 29th, 1999 in the Carolinas Medical Center. Motivated by pressures from Michael's mother to meet her grandchildren and seeking to change their current lifestyle that they found monotonous, the Laurens moved to Chattanooga, Tennessee. Michael and Kelli moved into the same neighborhood in which Michael's mother lived, found jobs as surgical technicians once again, this time in Parkridge East Hospital, and this time both worked full schedules, leaving Bryan and Kaley in the care of Rita Laurens, Michael's mother, during the day, thus allowing money to come in to the family much easier.

Raised as a male from birth, Alaina's childhood was somewhat privileged due to the effort that her parents had put into earning funds for the family: all of her needs and wants were provided for. While showing no abnormal traits up through her childhood, Alaina played well with whatever toys she would be given and regarded herself however she was regarded by others. While she got along well with her grandmother and sister, she only saw her mother and father for roughly two hours a day before falling asleep, and unbeknownst to her at the time, both were frequently inebriated when she was around them as the stress of their constant work would bring up their habits once again. Did Grandma not notice this? Were there not any repercussions to this neglectful lifestyle beyond Alaina feeling distant? Even if Alaina's too young to recognise their alcoholism, there's every chance Kaley's talking to her school about Mom and Dad's happy juice problem. This left Alaina feeling somewhat distant from her parents as she grew up. Once she began elementary school, she would stop being raised by her grandmother and her parents would again take time off to allow them to work the same schedule as her schedule for school, allowing them to be around for her after school to spend more time with Alaina and Kaley.

I'd like to point out that after this point Kaley completely disappears from the profile. We could do with some mention of how Alaina gets on along with her sister, and what her opinion is of events in Alaina's life like her transitioning and her deteriorating academic career.

Her elementary years passed by normally, with Alaina doing well in all of her subjects and getting on well with her peers. However, she was notably discomforted with the beginnings of her gendered socialization and despite keeping these thoughts to herself, she found herself wishing to be a girl and being friends with girls more than boys. Despite this, she still identified as male due to being gendered as male and not understanding the concept of gender dysphoria.

In middle school, Alaina found herself increasingly depressed with her gender presentation, but not yet understanding what the cause was, she found herself increasingly playing RPGs and video games as a form of escapism. She found herself becoming friends with people who shared these interests and that would become her primary social group throughout middle school.

In eighth grade, she found her grades falling and found herself losing interest in the RPGs that she had played to escape the depression before. Noticing her parents' stocked alcohol cellar, Alaina stole a bottle of wine and began drinking it as an experiment. She found herself enjoying the feeling and would periodically begin stealing from her parents' wine cellar and drinking as coping mechanism for her depression, attempting to drink to a small enough extent that they wouldn't notice. While she was successful over the course of several months, her parents had finally noticed the disappearance and had discovered several bottles of wine in Alaina's room while she was at school.

Rather than anger, they instead felt guilt as they had assumed that Alaina had inherited their alcoholism and picked up her habits from them. After a long discussion, she had admitted her intense depression and feelings of wrongness with her gender. They immediately took her to a therapist who correctly diagnosed Alaina with gender dysphoria and informed her parents. While her parents were dissatisfied with the idea due to their own religious backgrounds, as the social climate was becoming more accepting and awareness of transgender issues was being raised, the two consented to beginning Hormone Replacement Therapy for Alaina.

Alaina became much happier and found her depression all but alleviated once starting HRT. However, as she had just begun high school, she was unwilling to come out publicly to her peers, nervous that they wouldn't accept her. As a result, she only confided in her closest friends at the time her true gender identity, and only went by 'Alaina' to them and her family. With the revelation of her gender, her grades improved and she became much more happier. Despite this, she still maintained the coping mechanism of alcohol that she had for stressful circumstances but was drinking much less often than before. She wanted to become involved in an activity as she had started to find the video games that she had played for escapism unnecessary, so as a result, she joined the drama club, finding herself enjoying acting Why? and finding a true passion for the art despite having to play male roles. After finding herself talented at singing through musical theater, she also joined her school's choir as she found a passion for that venue of performance as well.

In her sophomore year, the physical changes had become clear, and having decided against confiding her truth for the rest of high school, she opted to publicly come out as transgender via social media and officially changed her name and gender. This is written a bit confusingly. She’s opted to hide her truth for high school, but then decides to reveal her truth? I can see what you’re going for, but I think the wording needs a rewrite. Have a rethink on that that ‘and’ connective. While she was nervous at first, she was delighted to find that most people accepted the change easily and she found herself accepted by most people. In the interest of perfect neutrality and not dictating reactions, could you replace most with many? Also this sentence repeats the same point twice.

Following her coming out, Alaina desired an image change from the somewhat nerdy view that people had of her from middle school. Alaina became much more socially involved and active on social media, and she also made an effort to make friends with those in the popular crowd and party scene. As well, She had also begun a jogging and yoga regimen to keep herself in shape and to further distance herself from the nerdy image that she saw herself as having.

In her Sophomore year, she had began distancing herself from her friend group that she had maintained from middle school, as she did not like associating with people that reminded her of her days as a male, opting instead to move forward with her friends in choir, theater, and her newfound friends following her coming out. Having maintained her drinking habits throughout high school, she had become much more social with them at this point and began going to parties frequently and also experimenting with other drugs such as marijuana and Xanax. This caused her to gain a reputation throughout her school as somewhat trashy. She found that she enjoyed the attention people gave her and the feelings of popularity that she gained from it, finding these feelings to be very validating to her. Why is she validated by a negative reputation, rather than being bothered by it? As such, she found herself constantly socializing and going out, enjoying having people pay attention to her in such a way, finding that being around people and having people like her further resolved her feelings of being an outsider. This has caused her to become emotionally dependant on other people for validation.

Her Junior and Senior years of high school much continued the trends started the previous summer. The previous paragraph implies this is happening across the Sophmore year, rather than just in the summer. As such, she found her grades starting to fall once again due to the frequent partying and lack of time spent studying, causing her grades to mostly fall to C's or D's with A's in her elective classes such as theater and choir. While she was somewhat stressed about this, she found herself much preferring to think about the upcoming party or hanging out with her friends rather than worrying about the far future when her grades would catch up to her. While her parents were worried about her grades and her frequent going-out, she was always able to assure them that she would 'do better next time' No need for quotes here. at which point she would briefly manage to raise her grades before they again dropped. Any concerns from the school? She’s a seemingly bright student who’s falling into a bad lifestyle, after all.

With her increasing attention to her social position and social media, Alaina decided to become more involved with her image and more socially aware. As such she became involved with activism for animals and the environment, frequently posting about it on social media and wearing accessories to show her devotion to these topics, even going vegan to promote animal rights and environmentalism. As well as this, she had attempted to maintain a friendly and energetic disposition with most people to stay in their good graces and promote a likeable image for herself. Despite this, she frequently engages in gossip with her more popular friends to maintain her status with them, causing her to develop a reputation as fake with many people but her overall social position is very comfortable. Doesn’t she have a trashy reputation around school? Wouldn’t that mixed with being considered fake colour her social position some?

While Alaina is outwardly very confident and comfortable in her gender expression, she is shaken somewhat easily by criticism and harassment, though she generally internalizes it rather than expressing it outwardly.

Her frequent partying and going out has caused a distant relationship and many fights with her family, though she still manages to generally stay in their good graces by telling them what she thinks they want to hear. They still financially support her and her transition but they do so reluctantly, having to be greatly persuaded by her every time she asks for money. While she's somewhat sad about her relationship with her family, she does nothing to alleviate it and places the blame for the tension more on them then herself.

Following high school, Alaina has ambitions to continue her passions for theater in college, however she finds herself having to apply for schools with higher acceptance rates than she would like due to her slacking off academically in her junior and senior year, hoping that her extracurriculars will give her the boost she needs for acceptance. You might want to split this paragraph into two sentences for readability.

Advantages: Alaina is a skilled actress, and may be able to use these skills to her advantage in securing allies and lying in situations where that is a necessity. She has a decent amount of stamina from her jogging and yoga regimen that could allow her to outrun a threat. Alaina is well-known around the school, allowing her to have an easier time meeting people to ally with.
Disadvantages: She has very poor long-term planning abilities which may lead to her making decisions that are detrimental to her in the long run. She also has poor stress-control and tends to bottle up emotions which may lead to acting impulsively. Her upper-body strength is low and thus will have little self-defense ability. This reads a bit weak as a disadvantage, since many students will have worse physical status than her and no self-defence experience isn’t uncommon. You might want to just snip this one out, since the rest are plenty. She is very needy for attention and companionship which could allow her to be manipulated easily. Her negative reputation with certain people may cause others to distrust her.


That's it for now, so post here when you've made the edits and I'll give her another look. Thanks!
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~Edited~! I think that should be everything
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Better, but we still have a few more edits to do.

Quote:
 
both were frequently inebriated when she was around them for the first several years of her life as the stress of their constant work would bring up their habits once again. Alaina’s grandmother was able to catch on to it becoming an issue once again, and as such confronted them on the issue.

A few years is quite a long time before Grandma’s catching on. Did their drinking get worse during that time, or was there another reason she didn’t pick up on it sooner? You might be better off thinking in a timeframe of months instead.

Quote:
 
With the revelation of her gender, her grades improved and she became much more happier.

This still needs to be fixed. The 'more' is redundant when it has got 'happier' right after it.

Quote:
 
She wanted to become involved in an activity as she had started to find the video games that she had played for escapism unnecessary, so as a result, she joined the drama club, finding herself enjoying acting as she found joy in experiencing the worlds and lives of other people and characters, enjoying the diversity and differences she found from her own life and experiences.

This sentence runs on and could do with being split in two.

Quote:
 
confiding her truth for the rest of high school,

Also still needs to be changed: high school is two words.

Quote:
 
She also began a jogging and yoga regimen

I misled you on this one: the tense I suggested was awkward in the context of the rest of the paragraph, so I’d recommend going with this one instead.

Quote:
 
Her junior and senior years of high school

These still aren’t capitalised.
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Thanks for putting up with me! Hopefully that should be it~
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You were so close, but you missed this one again:

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Her junior and senior years of high school

Junior and senior still aren't capitalised in this context, as you have in the profile.
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Curse my illiteracy >:/ Edited
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