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The V1 Read-A-Thon
Topic Started: Sep 28 2017, 07:14 PM (7,252 Views)
Kermit
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eEeEEEeEEEeeEeeeee
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: ))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) give to kermit
"Kermit you are the guy in the horror movie that finds a book bound in human skin and decides to read out loud what is inside for fun" - some mean lady named Ruggahissy

i make art i think????


Sadly kermit looked at a mariavel. It was so sad... such a sad mariavel... like him... he only waned a normal life... was that too much to ask? was it?
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mason lucien

woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo let’s go!








Profile:

Hmm so Mason would be considered handsome, but he is an UNWASHED FILTHY MAN! So he’s not. Common nicknames used for him at school are “dirt” and “messy”. Christ just take a shower dude yeeeesh. also he has dice in his pockets. U N D E R A G E D G A M B L I N G! hey thats illegal mason : (

bio:

Apparently Mason’s home life is relatively uneventful, and “seems to be the usual for messed up kids like him”, so i guess it’s not relatively uneventful then. TLDR. Mason’s mum was like “bye family u guys suk!” and ran off and then his dad was like “:’-(“ and became a drunkman and spent all his money on booze except for some money to buy food, buts thats all the money ok. Mason’s mum sent them money but then she didn’t and Mason became a GAMBLINGMAN at age 10. Mason dressed up in his dad’s clothes and ran street-gambling operations as a “funny short man” named “Mace”. Mason made like 20 bucks a week, which his dad usually spent on B O O Z E.

Mason’s dad get sick and cant work anymore, so Mason starts doing everything and his G A M B L I N G is his household’s only source of income which is probably not very good. Mason starts doing some online gambling and STEALS DANYA’S MONEY WHAT THE FUCK.

Also he’s handled by Kaishi who is the creator of Vicky D., so thats a thing i guess.

Also, from the profile conclusion: “Conclusions: Wait, this kid's MACE21?! The cheating idiot...wonder if he remembers our round of "Craps" online. Whatever, I hope he dies a horrible death. Cheaters never win, especially those who never shower (ha, take that kid!).”

wow V1 danya was weeeeeeird







PREGAME: HAHAHAHHAHAHA V1 DOESNT HAVE PREGAME AAAAAAAAAHAHAHYUE&YU AYUAY





ISLAND:

Mason wakes up in Cillian Crowe’s starting thread. OOOOOOOOOOOOOH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Cillian’s like, singing happy birthday or whatever and Mason pops out of a bush or something and is like “yess, happy birthday to you, cillian. [insert evil laugh here].”

EXCERPT FROM MASON’S FIRST POST: “He knew Cillian's type. He already gave in...a weakling to the game. Either that, or the kid was from an insane asylum, or something. He laughed at the thought. As if.”

I’m really not a fan of this kind of “oohohohoho get it he IS from an asylum *winkwink* look how clever I am” type stuff, because well, frankly, it takes you right out of the story and just makes me roll my eyes, and this becomes a bit of a problem with Mason.

Mason’s like “yes i will shoot him when i open my bag and get a gun” (but he doesn’t have a gun but he doesn’t know it ohohohohohohoh *winkwink*). Cillian goes “Ahhh!” (actual quote) because Mason snuck up on him like a dooooofus and then the voice in Cillian’s head is like “YESSS BLOOOOOOOD GIVE ME MORE BLOOOOOD YES CILLIAN BLOOOOOOOOOOOD” and Cillian is like “do u wanna see my birthday present?”




[insert lenny face here]





Mason’s like “but wait I have a present too” and Cillian’s like “NO YOU HAVE TO SEE MINE”

“Yes...break down the madman by forcing him to beg for it.” (re: presents)

oh also I should probably mention that the presents are their weapons, not their PENISES (penisi?), but I digress.




"I want it."



lol





Mason unzips his bag and finds out his weapon was a GPS and is like “OOOOOOH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” and throws some bread at Cillian and then runs away.

NEXTTHREAD!





Mason fucks off to the school, where he discovers the corpses of Sydney Morvran and Tayli Vreeland.

“Or, maybe - Mason laughed at the thought - the girl was carrying in the laptop, thinking she had found a way out of there, tripped, and the laptop fell and broke, and her gun went off, hitting the boy in the lungs. Mason wiped his mouth with his sleeve, snickering all the while. "And then, the girl is crying over his death, instead of getting out of the danger zone. That has got to be one of the stupidest things I've heard.””

*WINKING INTENSIFIES*

I really dont like it when this happens.





Heather Pendergast stumbles out of the woods after being shot like 900 times by Dave Jackson and into the school. Mason and Heather sass each other for a bit and then Mason becomes a fucking weirdo rapist pervman.

"My name is Mason. Now, show me that arm of yours, and any other wounds you might have. It might help to take off your clothes so I can help you better." Mason commanded smugly. "Don't think nothing of it, Heather. I'm going to do my best to not hurt you in anyway, alright?"

4 goodness sake mason




._.




Heather’s like “okay but dont look at my nekkidness”

“Mason winked, letting his hands wander over her thighs to check if she had any leg wounds. "Sorry, but you're going to have to take off your pants, and tell me where all your wounds are."

Christ on a bike no




Heather punches Mason in the face (YES!)




Mason doesn’t get the hint.



“"Ow!!" Mason cried out, getting hit. "You're lucky I'm a nice guy, really you are." He glared. "I'm not going to force you to do anything, but really..." He rubbed the side of his face with a small sigh. "Don't you know that we might die as soon as we walk outside? Don't you just want to be touched, just once? Or, to touch a boy just once?" He smiled, his eyes slightly pleading now. "You know, I've never kissed a girl before...you'd be my first. My first, and probably my last." His smile turned a little grim as his last words dawned on him. Any breath could be the last. Any step, any sip of water. Anything.

"You must like someone at your school, right? If it'll make you want to, you can call me by his name. I'm sure that you liked someone." He moved a little closer to Heather, his smile softening a little.”





Y’know I’m starting to think the present was Mason’s dick after all.


Heather's like "no"



Mason’s like “NO PLEASE HAVE SEX WITH ME I BEG OF YOU” and Heather is like “no” and then she shoots Mason in the chest a whole bunch. Mason’s like “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH!” and Heather gets annoyed by this for some reason, points her gun at Mason’s dick, says literally the worst one-liner I’ve ever read ("Dont Fear the Reaper!") and then fires.





Well I guess Cillian’s never gonna get that present after all. Poor Cillian.





Mason’s like “BLEEEEEAUGH IM IN SO MUCH PAIN JUST KILL ME :(((((((((((((((“ and Heather says the same one-liner again and then shoots mason in hed.

Mason’s last thoughts are regretting being a shitty pervertman and trying to apologize to Heather before she shoots him, to no avail. So at least he felt bad about it, I guess.





Conclusion: Mason’s mediocre at his best. The constant *WINKWINK* stuff and the sudden turn from “gambleboy” to “pervertboy” is just way too sudden. Overall, probably don’t recommend.


gimmmmmmmme nother ples
"Kermit you are the guy in the horror movie that finds a book bound in human skin and decides to read out loud what is inside for fun" - some mean lady named Ruggahissy

i make art i think????


Sadly kermit looked at a mariavel. It was so sad... such a sad mariavel... like him... he only waned a normal life... was that too much to ask? was it?
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James Kelecks is like, a normal dude according to his profile. I’ve got nothing more to say. He’s a person who might exist in real life. No frog screaming required.

Now, on the other hand is his island thread….





ISLAND:

Why are all the horny kids at the school on this island? Jeeeeez louise



TLDR: InactiveJames is at the school and so is Naoji Hideyoshi and then Clemence is there too and she’s like “im not a murderer” even tho she’s a murderer and then she seduces James and then they do the sex. Clemence stabs him in the chest mid-fuck and he dies and then she decapitates Naoji with a door somehow. THE END.




More like James Killsecks.




an other ple a se
"Kermit you are the guy in the horror movie that finds a book bound in human skin and decides to read out loud what is inside for fun" - some mean lady named Ruggahissy

i make art i think????


Sadly kermit looked at a mariavel. It was so sad... such a sad mariavel... like him... he only waned a normal life... was that too much to ask? was it?
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Kermit
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ADIB YAY SOTFS FIRST ARABIC CHARACTER WAHOOOOOO!

TLDR: Adib was rich and lived in New Orleans but the he got REKT by a hurricane and then got rescued by the terrorists i guess.

aight. I’m surprisingly ok with this for some reason. It’s a fine profile for V1.

SIDENOTE: The mention of a New Orleans hurricane reminded me that Hurricane Katrina has like, a year ago when V1 was going on. Also, 9/11’d been 4 years ago and Kermit was but a wee five-year-old (four-year-old when V1 started). V1 is oooooooooold.





ISLAND: So Adib has one post and he’s killed by another one of his handler’s kids, but like, it’s not a bad post or anything.

Adib walks up behind Hannah Juett, trying to figure out if she’s playing or not. oh also he has a halberd. They talk for a bit and then Adib asks Hannah what her weapon was and SHE LIES NOOOO HANNAH! Hannah says she has a brick (SHE HAS A GUN), and decides not to tell him about the gun until Adib proves himself trustworthy. Hannah opens up her pack to get to her map AND THEN THE BAG FALLS OPEN AND ADIB SEES THE GUN OOOOOOOOOOH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Adib rightfully freaks the fuck out because he thinks Hannah was tricking him and was gonna shoot him and then he’s like “I AM ANGERY RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH” and charges at Hannah and they have a tiff and then Hannah shoots him and Adib is rip in peace.




Conclusion: Adib’s actually pretty alright for a V1 fodder character. His death was a misunderstanding, which was a rarity for V1, and it’s written decently well. Also I’m happy V1’s only Arabic character wasn’t a crazy terrorist man.

While I liked him, I can’t really recommend Adib. He only has one post, which is a oneshot shared with one of his handler’s other kids, and if you want to read him you may as well just read Hannah Juett.




Another! (blessed RNG please more short ones)
"Kermit you are the guy in the horror movie that finds a book bound in human skin and decides to read out loud what is inside for fun" - some mean lady named Ruggahissy

i make art i think????


Sadly kermit looked at a mariavel. It was so sad... such a sad mariavel... like him... he only waned a normal life... was that too much to ask? was it?
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NEVERA AEEEEEEEEEEEEERO is not a real name i dont think but thats ok!

P R O F I L E:

So the first sentence is “Nevera stands 5'7" and is very good at kicking.”

I am enthused by this.

She is apparently easy to get along with but also VEEEEEERY DEEEEEEVIOUS so I’m not really sure which of these is the truth because they kinda contradict each other. Basically, she dresses like a “cool” anime character from the early 2000s, but then again I guess she kinda is because V1 is super fucking wacky ok.

Also: “She has the tendancy to kick alot and also to stare into the distance. She may be lively, but her kicks have left many a scar, even on those that she loves!”

holy shit im in love already.

Kermit kicks the reader (because he loves them too!)

Her bio is a mess and from what I can decipher, she lives in the slums, he parents died, she got adopted by her aunt and uncle, her uncle got CANCER, and also she was born with CANCER and lost the use of her left eye due to radiation therapy. I think she might need to go to a better hospital, maybe one that doesn’t treat cancer by injecting radium into patient’s eyes.

also she has a weakness for hurt boys.


I S L A N D:


Nevera’s narrative describes her as waking up in the school even though SHE WAKES UP IN THE HOUSE-PLACE REEEEEEEEE! She has a dream that she’s being chased by murderers (suspiciously apropos), and then she punches the floor because she is ANGERY and hurts her hand. Realism WOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Kouji Ginsenshi, apparently coming from the thread “??????????????????”, walks in and stares at Nevera for a few minutes and then in a COLDEMOTIONLESSVOICE he says “helo there” like the villain in a bad slasher flick and then Nevera jumps up and “"What do you want, foul beast!?" She said quite unpleasently.”

tbh im fond of nevera already
“Kouji looked at her in shock, "Foul Beast!? ME!? But my mom always thought I was cute, never a beast." Kouji replied as he look at the girl.”

tbh im already not fond of kouji


oh I take it back I hate both of them

“"You really wanna fight, don't you." She closed her eyes and smirked. "Well, it won't be pretty, Mr. Beast!"”


Kouji stared at her and held his stance, "Grr.." Kouji growled”

*spiders crawl out of kermit’s mouth*

Oh jesus christ this is an anime fight scene. I LIKE MY SOTF NOT BEING A BAD ANIME WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME!?

fuck it im just gonna post excerpts from the fight scene

“Her darkened eyes glared at his stance and swug her staff at his head.

Kouji was ready for such attacks and dodge the attack quickly.
"I like your style, so have a fighting partner?" KOuji asked mid-air and then landed on the ground behind her.

"No....I work alone." She said with a scowl.

She ran out the door of the bedroom and into the kitchen. Her braided hair flowing slightly as she ran. She really didn't want anyone to help her, or anything. She just wanted to go home. She climbed on top of the counter and hid behind one of the open cabinet doors. She steadied her breathing and held her staff close. She thought to herself, damn, I forgot my bag!

Kouji looked down and saw the girl had leave her bag, "Hmm she left her bag, mm where she go?" KLouji asked aloud, and went towards the kitchen, thinking it was the way she had gone.”

AND END FIGHT SCENE!

Nevera hears Klouji (thats his name now) walking and gets VERY ANGERY and-

oh god what is going on in this thread?

“"Why did you follow me here?" She asked throwing her voice to the halls trying not to give away her location. “
*spiders crawl out of Kermit’s eyes*

Slayer pops in and is like “Why is Klouji in two places at once and J E R E M Y T O R R E S is here yay! Klouji’s just like “calm down u forgot your bag over here” and Nevera’s like *mine* and Klouji doesn’t notice her and-

*blink, blink* "Uhh where... it go?" Kouji answered aloud after a second. Kouji thought to himself, "Women I'll never understand them."

I’ll never understand you, Klouji.

Nevera calls Klouji an idiot and is like “well we got off to a bad start” and also Jeremy isn’t wearing a shirt. Klouji stares at Nevera’s ass for a bit and then Nevera SMACK HIM IN FACE and Klouji starts talking in Japanese and aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaugh kill me

Jeremy’s like “calm the fuck down” and then he and Nevera talk for a bit.

Nevera absorbs Jeremy’s quality through osmosis and is suddenly actually kinda okay!

Honestly I like this quite a bit. It’s just Nevera and Jeremy doing stuff (Klouji’s staring at a wall or something idk) and aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh he’s here again.

“Kouji stared, "Hmmm food..." Kouji follows the smell, "FOOD!" Kouji jumps at the food.”

*Kermits crawl out of spider’s eyes*

Some guy named Scott pops in and is like “NO U RNT GONA KIL ME AAAAAAAAAAA” and then tries to kill everyone and gets fucking rekt.

Kouji: “"Grr women, so weird and I want that food."”

Nevera and Kouji have a conversation with food while Scott is beating Jeremy to almost-death with a brick and then Slayer pops in and is like “HOW DID THIS CORPSE DISAPPEAR?” and then Theseus is like “why is kouji so calm jeesus christ?” and then guitarjack pops in and is like “yo u should make a posting order.” and then Bloody_fists (scott’s handler) is like “I AM ANNOYED THAT KOUJI IS TALKING ABOUT FOOD” and then Jeremy knocks Scott the fuck out.and then Nevera falls over and is also unconscious but wakes up after a second and she and Jeremy have a moment.

Kouji is here again!

“"Nice he's getting beat up." Kouji smiled big not really knowing how to react to this, what scream and run or something?”

Koooooooooooooujiiiiiiiiiiiiii

Nevera’s handler: “((OOC: Gin.... You aren't really RPing very well...... I don't think that this site is for you anymore....... maybe Nev should just kill you off now that Kousaka is dead....))”

christ on a bike

R U D E

Ginsenshi’s like “lol k” and Klouji suddenly becomes a SCARY BOY

Kermit passes out and finds himself in the next thread.




blahblahblahblah Kermit skips to the last thread because he’s already read Nevera and this review is really long already.





Sidney Crosby the hockeyboi shoots Nevera in the back.




THE END!

Conclusion: I guess I’d actually kinda recommend Nevera. Like, she starts off shaky (boy does she ever), but once she meets up with some of the more grounded characters, her quality goes up. Read her if you wanna, I guess.
"Kermit you are the guy in the horror movie that finds a book bound in human skin and decides to read out loud what is inside for fun" - some mean lady named Ruggahissy

i make art i think????


Sadly kermit looked at a mariavel. It was so sad... such a sad mariavel... like him... he only waned a normal life... was that too much to ask? was it?
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Kermit
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henlo may i have a hmun?
"Kermit you are the guy in the horror movie that finds a book bound in human skin and decides to read out loud what is inside for fun" - some mean lady named Ruggahissy

i make art i think????


Sadly kermit looked at a mariavel. It was so sad... such a sad mariavel... like him... he only waned a normal life... was that too much to ask? was it?
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Kermit
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As I begin reading Gilbert's profile, I immediately come upon the realization that this is a Dodd character. How, you may ask? Well, there's a South Park!Gilbert right on the wiki page, and the appearance section is like basically pure distilled Dodd-writing. Not that this is a bad thing or anything, though.

Dodd's characters are a bastion of semi-normalcy in the sea of Devi Satomes and KLOUJIS that is V1. Gilbert just looks like a normal dude. Tonal stuff is a bit of a problem, yeah, but that's about it.

God this feels like a V2 RAT writeup.

BIO: TLDR Gil is a stinky NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERD who gets bullied a lot. Also he's from Quebec. Hmm, I wonder if there are any other Canadians who might help him out with his bullying problems? Say, maybe a feisty red-headed Adam Canadian?

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

also he's in 9th grade for some reason ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

oh wait, what's that in the trivia section I see?

Wiki
 
During Gilbert's first day of school, it was Adam Dodd who came to his aide in the hallway and helped him out.


DOOOODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD! *shakes fist at sky*

hm now im having v3 RAT flashbacks too.




ISLAND!:

So Gil wakes up and sits on a rock and mopes. Shoar (what that's not even close to a real name) Wilson pops outta fucking nowhere and I guess flying-kicks Gil in the head or something. Shoar gets like, really close to killing Gil, but then...

A red goatee...

A hockeyman...

A Canadian....

An ADAMDODD!

Adam kills Shoar to death and then Gil has a flashback to show how awesome Dodd is.

Gil's narrative
 
Adam Dodd had never really been one to have an extravagent wardrobe, but as he lowered his pistol, sliding the weapon back into his jeans, Gilbert knew that the same happy-go-lucky, kind student from back in New York might not be the same now. As he'd thought before, the game changed people, and if Adam Dodd were now a changed man, he didn't know.


DODD PIMPING INTENSIFIES

Dodd fucks off and then Gil fucks off. END THREAD!

Gil happens upon Luca Donovan and shoots at her because she's a meaniepants. The Warehouse crew wander up and find Gil and he's all like "pls dont kil me :'-(" and Luca fires back at Gil, hitting Jill (a member of the warehouse crew) in the shoulder. Luca then gets Jilled to death.

Gil accidentally fires his gun again because he is SC2 Everett (Kermit character pimping intensifies) and almost hit's Brackie's SC2 character who is in a bush. Brackie's SC2 character gets REAL MAD and shoots Gil. The endddddddd! Also Dodd shows up in Gil's deathpost.


CONCLUSION: Gil just pretty much existed as an accessory to Dodd's storyline. He shows up, says how cool Dodd is, dies, and then makes Dodd sad. Like, he does a decent job of not being terrible, but you should just read Dodd/Jill & Martyn/Jack instead.

Gonna do a few more sprites before asking for another.
"Kermit you are the guy in the horror movie that finds a book bound in human skin and decides to read out loud what is inside for fun" - some mean lady named Ruggahissy

i make art i think????


Sadly kermit looked at a mariavel. It was so sad... such a sad mariavel... like him... he only waned a normal life... was that too much to ask? was it?
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Kermit
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henlo i wod like a nother
"Kermit you are the guy in the horror movie that finds a book bound in human skin and decides to read out loud what is inside for fun" - some mean lady named Ruggahissy

i make art i think????


Sadly kermit looked at a mariavel. It was so sad... such a sad mariavel... like him... he only waned a normal life... was that too much to ask? was it?
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Kermit
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Quote:
 
Extra Curricular Activity: Comic Book Club, Video Game Club, Anime Club, Track Team.



look at this fukin nerd lol Kermit throws things at jake


Well, on the bright side, his hobbies are like, normal.

Bio:

Jake is a stinky neeeeeeeeeerd! also “>>;“. I’m unsure what it means, but it’s it’s in his profile.

Quote:
 
“Particularly his sister, Anna, who would often get in his way while playing video games. He realized, of course, that she was just an infant but that didn't mean she couldn't show his games the respect they deserved!”


Kermit beats jake up


Quote:
 
“His brother, who was only older than him by a year, was much the same but instead of being responsible, he often found himself in trouble. Once, he had even nearly killed another boy. Boy, had that gotten his parents angry.”


??????????????????what?????????????????????

Quote:
 
“His parents had decided that it was probably wise if Jake and his older brother didn't go to the same school because they had never gotten along overly well. Had he the chance, John would beat Jake up every chance he got.”


I’m John.

TLDR;

Posted Image





ISLAND:

Jake’s only thread is “?????????????????” which does not bode well.

Quote:
 
“(Shinya continued from: Truth be Told, the Child was Borne))
((Eh-Sun continued from ?? ?? ??? ??))
(and Jake is just starting because Skythe gave me premission to kill him XD)”


well rip jake

The post starts off with Shinya killing himself in a confusing and overly-elaborate way. Not sure why it wasn’t just a oneshot, but ok.

Jake crawls over to Shinya’s corpse, steals all of his shit, and says “Hell yes now the jocks cant kill me” and then a gunshot goes boom and Jake dies. THE END!

EDIT: OH MAN HOW COULD I FORGET KOUJI!

he's there for a single post after everyone dies.

Quote:
 
Kouji wonder towards the Bamboo Coppice and found Eh-Sun, "YOU!" Kouji shouted aloud. "Hey you I want my blade back!"


oh klouji i love you so



Conclusion: the most I can say about Jake is that he existed.

Fuck it, another one, please.
Edited by Kermit, Oct 8 2017, 02:25 PM.
"Kermit you are the guy in the horror movie that finds a book bound in human skin and decides to read out loud what is inside for fun" - some mean lady named Ruggahissy

i make art i think????


Sadly kermit looked at a mariavel. It was so sad... such a sad mariavel... like him... he only waned a normal life... was that too much to ask? was it?
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Hmmm ok this'll be entirely out of memory 'cus I read Art like last week for my spriteathon.

In his profile, Art's kinda set up as this master-manipulator type dude, but Dodd was like "well I don't know what to do with him" on-island, so he gets foddered to Cillian.

His profile isn't the worst, he seems relatively normal (sans mental-disorder), and yeah.


ISLAND:

Hi Cillian.

So Art finds Cillian crying or whatever and is like "strangle" and Cillian is like "NO BAD DOCTOR MEN AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH" and Art is like "shh no no its ok dont struggle" and Cillian somehow slides his hand into Art's gut (WWWWHAAAAAAAAT!?) and Devi's here and she's like "hmhmhmhmhm i hope theres blood" and then Cillian jumps on art so many times that he has a hole straight through him. rip art.

Conclusion: Just read Cillian, I guess.

not asking for another right now, you know the drill.
Edited by Kermit, Oct 8 2017, 03:11 PM.
"Kermit you are the guy in the horror movie that finds a book bound in human skin and decides to read out loud what is inside for fun" - some mean lady named Ruggahissy

i make art i think????


Sadly kermit looked at a mariavel. It was so sad... such a sad mariavel... like him... he only waned a normal life... was that too much to ask? was it?
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I'll take another one, i guess. I'll read 'em when I'm finally fucking done with Garrett.
"Kermit you are the guy in the horror movie that finds a book bound in human skin and decides to read out loud what is inside for fun" - some mean lady named Ruggahissy

i make art i think????


Sadly kermit looked at a mariavel. It was so sad... such a sad mariavel... like him... he only waned a normal life... was that too much to ask? was it?
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[ *  *  *  *  * ]
Rip naoji gets doorcapitated

He's pretty okay I guess. His only surviving post is his inactivedeath, and it's decent if not over the top.

Another!
"Kermit you are the guy in the horror movie that finds a book bound in human skin and decides to read out loud what is inside for fun" - some mean lady named Ruggahissy

i make art i think????


Sadly kermit looked at a mariavel. It was so sad... such a sad mariavel... like him... he only waned a normal life... was that too much to ask? was it?
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Kermit
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eEeEEEeEEEeeEeeeee
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oh boy i'm just getting all the inactive kills, aren't I. This is grand!

Ai Kurosawa is a premade player. Everyone bullies her and she almost killed a kid and she's Japanese.

TLDR; Ai doesn't get anything from her own perspective and gets murderkilled by a terrorist in an inactive fodder kill.

also

Quote:
 
This is why the audience is given vomit bags, my dears. SOTF brand plastic and paper bags for all occasions.


what
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"Kermit you are the guy in the horror movie that finds a book bound in human skin and decides to read out loud what is inside for fun" - some mean lady named Ruggahissy

i make art i think????


Sadly kermit looked at a mariavel. It was so sad... such a sad mariavel... like him... he only waned a normal life... was that too much to ask? was it?
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Kermit
Member Avatar
eEeEEEeEEEeeEeeeee
[ *  *  *  *  * ]
: o

HI THESEUS I LOVE YOU.
"Kermit you are the guy in the horror movie that finds a book bound in human skin and decides to read out loud what is inside for fun" - some mean lady named Ruggahissy

i make art i think????


Sadly kermit looked at a mariavel. It was so sad... such a sad mariavel... like him... he only waned a normal life... was that too much to ask? was it?
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Kermit
Member Avatar
eEeEEEeEEEeeEeeeee
[ *  *  *  *  * ]
Ian Hargrave is fat!

'The first things someone loooking at Ian would notice are him being massively overweight"

Ian Hargrave is fat!

Ian Hargrave was sad because he's fat and then Slayer Baseball boy #5 is like "join baseball" and ian is hapi! : )

"His weight has earned him the somewhat joking nickname of "Meat" among his teammates (though they're the only people he'll allow to call him that)."

Ian Hargrave is fat! Ian Hargrave is fat! Ian Hargrave is adopted by Kaishi!

"Ian Hargrave, baseball player and fat kid(...)"

Like ok, I get it. He's fat. At least he had other character traits in his profile like his self-doubt and sadness. I feel like if Slayer'd held onto him maybe Ian wouldn'tve ended up being FAT!fodder, but alas it wasn't to be. Characters that are fat and sad and riddled with self-doubt are the best characters [WINKING INTENSIFIES], but hey, sometimes you just need a fodder kid.

Ian is walking along a path and then he thinks about how he'll never be able to do anything ever again and he gets sad and cries. (wow just like someone else WINKINGWINKINGWINKING)

Peri comes along so rip Ian, and the Peri just shoots Ian i guess. Italian!SlayerMurderbot is here too even though he doesn't have much relevance upon the scene. Ian gets hit in the shoulder by the boolet, so he falls over and pretends to be dead. also he thinks about killing peri while his back is turned which is kinda jarring and like "ian no not u too".

Peri's like "no ur not dead" and shoots Ian in the spine this time, while saying "Wakey Wakey Eggs and Bacey" which is like heck peri calm down jeez louise guy. Peri's a dick and Ian's like "INTERNAL SCREAMING" and then Peri cuts Ian's head off while saying "You are lucky.God loves fat kids".

peri y u gotta be so rUuuUude? dont u know hes human toOooOo?

Ian dies because he got decapitated but not before Kaishi throws a flashback about how he was doomed from the start because IanIsFat and like

y'know as a reader I do have a memory of longer than 30 seconds. You don't need to state that IAN IS FAT and IAN IS DOOMED over and over again, because we the reader already know that from the first time you said it.

"Ian "Meat" Hargrave was exactly like his shell on the outside. A big, fat cowardly loser doomed from the start."

sighs

CONCLUSION: Ian had potential to be like, not fodder. If this writeup were just based off of his profile, I'd say he could've actually been a fairly complex character, y'know being all sad and stuff but then trying to prove himself and maybe also meeting up with his baseball buddies. Instead he was SAD and FAT and DOOMED and randomly thinking about murdering people and getting fed to Peri, so it's like "well ok then", leaving like no impact upon the reader. Oh well.
"Kermit you are the guy in the horror movie that finds a book bound in human skin and decides to read out loud what is inside for fun" - some mean lady named Ruggahissy

i make art i think????


Sadly kermit looked at a mariavel. It was so sad... such a sad mariavel... like him... he only waned a normal life... was that too much to ask? was it?
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