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Cast in the Name of God; Was day 6, then day 7, holy hell it's morning of day 8
Topic Started: Mar 23 2017, 08:46 PM (1,606 Views)
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[[Fiyori Senay, continued from St. Elsewhere]]

Fiyori Senay was a murderer.

There was no way around that truth. It didn't matter whether she acted alone or not. Her actions have led directly to the death of Isabel Ramirez. Fiyori had expected to feel different about it. Not that she would have any regret, or feel some sort of sadness. Isabel Ramirez was a cunt, as simple as that, a cunt that killed Fiyori's friends - and for Danny's death in particular Fiyori swore revenge and succeeded in doing so. However, there was no triumphant swelling in Fiyori's breast either. Yet she also couldn't say that she felt empty or any of that.

No, Fiyori knew what empty felt like. And she didn't feel empty at all. A different sentiment had been born, a new kind of emotion, with which Fiyori could start very little. Her body at least had no idea how to express it, and frankly Fiyori had trouble pondering it's philosophical ramifications.

Her eyes rested on the door to the lounge. The smudge of blood was still present on the edge, but it was barely noticeable. In fact, she held her left eye closed most of the time, so she really didn't use that glass. Isabel's slash - thankfully - didn't hit the eyeball, but the eyelid was cut. She noticed when it began stinging that morning.

Then her hand rested on the handle, and she pulled it down. She waited for a moment. She wouldn't open the door just yet.

"Here's Fiyori Senay. I don't want trouble and I come in peace."
Fiyori Senay
 


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Coleen, alright. She managed to bring Fiyori to smirk. That was as good as a conversation starter as it could be, Fiyori guessed. At least with someone who, according to the aforementioned announcement, has killed 'their own ally'.

Fiyori knew not too put much stock into what the terrorists said. It was meant to rile them up, and what they said were generous interpretations of the truth at best.

"If you don't mind I'd like to enter."

She pushed the door open by a few inches.

"I was taught not to talk through doors, you know?"
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It was almost an 'I wish' Fiyori would've said to reply. She wished she had a gun. She didn't though. And she held up fairly well all things considered.

"I have lock picks and Isabel's sickle. The sickle's on my belt and I'd rather leave it there."

The reasoning was perhaps not too obvious, but Fiyori didn't feel it needed explanation. Isabel's sickle, the instrument of murder in so many cases. The blood of so many people stuck and dried. And yet the blade was still sharp enough. Not as good as it was once, Fiyori guessed, but still enough to - say - cut open a water bottle or contaminate her food.

If she put it in her bag, that is. Which she didn't.

Fiyori entered. At first, she didn't look at Coleen, but at the sorry damage in the wall caused by her and Alba's and Brendan's little marksman training a few days ago. Obviously, it still had to be there. Figured the terrorists wouldn't bother fixing the hole, but Fiyori still felt mild surprise upon seeing it.

"Thank you for not shooting me. I appreciate it. If it makes you feel better, you can keep the gun close." Her eyes drifted over to the AK-47, then fixated on the spear nearby for a moment.

She was a few yards away from Coleen. Fiyori halted, and then finally tried to make eye contact with Coleen.

"I'd like to rest a bit here. Just a few minutes then I'll bugger off. If that isn't a problem."
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"Oh yes! Was passing by Isabel yesterday. Saw her and kinda got a bit pissed. Oh well, oh well, now the bitch is dead."

Fiyori had to reign herself in by that point. Her tone was too cheerful. Killing Isabel was a good decision, but perhaps it wasn't due to sound so pleased about it. Wouldn't want Coleen to get the wrong impression. The wound on her cheek was itching. Fiyori barely managed to stop herself from scratching.

Then, she looked for a chair. She got the hint. Understandable, she guessed. As good-natured their conversation was, a healthy distance both physical and emotional was probably the best for the two. They were just acquaintances. As bad as Fiyori could be with boundaries, some things just had to be respected.

What with the spear resting in Coleen's lap and all.

The chair Fiyori chose dragged across the floor. She turned it, so that when she sat down she could face Coleen.

"The wall's my doing as well." Fiyori paused for a moment. Then she remembered this little sentence would raise some questions. "Before you ask, I didn't shoot anyone. Just got the chance to train with a gun. Wasn't mine though." She shrugged. Keeping up the good atmosphere.
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Fiyori regretted her words. The lack of tension in the room led her to say more than was perhaps necessary. Still, words said couldn't be taken back. She noticed the slight shift in Coleen's disposition. Well, with what was said it was probably in Coleen's right to be a bit jumpy. Coleen killed her 'ally'. Perhaps, and that was pure speculation, that 'ally' was actually someone who betrayed her trust in a critical moment.

No, she couldn't allow herself to get distracted by thoughts like these. Coleen was still friendly. All Fiyori had to do was be more careful.

"Oh, thank you but I think these bandages are still good." She smiled at Coleen. It was a bit of a forced smile, even though Fiyori did so involuntarily. "As for the gun I mentioned, that belonged to Alba Reyes. She, I and Brendan Harte had been together for a day until we lost each other."
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"...what he did to Bern?"

Fiyori echoed softly. She stared at Coleen. The thing with Brendan and Bernadette was a tragedy. Yet, ultimately an accident. She hadn't asked for details. It would've been unwise to bother Brendan, when Fiyori could think for herself how it went down.

He slipped. He fell unto her, and then her illness flared up. It was unfortunate. It was unbelievable. However, she read an article or something a while back. About something similar. About people who died just because they fell ever so slightly. Because that was how life was. Because sometimes accidents happen. Because Brendan would not simply 'shove' his friend. It was a tragic incident, but there was simply nothing Brendan could've done.

And yet, the words Coleen chose, the tone she picked...

"As far as I know... I mean, it was an accident. You can't fault someone for that."
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It hurt. Breathing hurt. Fiyori wanted to stop. Just stop breathing and drop dead on the spot. Coleen's words were incredible. Fiyori could just shake her head at them and yet she did not doubt them. She wished she could. She wished she could just call Coleen a liar. Be angry at her, tell her that she didn't know shit.

"I- I did not ask for details. He was sorry for it and I..." Fiyori hesitated. Keeping eye contact with Coleen was now impossible, her eyes darted across the dirt on the floor, as if the rest of her sentence was hidden somewhere.

"How do you know?"
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It still hurt so much. It still hurt... why did she have to ask? Why did Coleen have to answer? Why did Coleen have to talk, and talk, and talk, and drive the stake even deeper? Why couldn't she just stop? Why couldn't Fiyori just say 'it's all a lie'? Why couldn't she stop feeling so much hatred?

All just because she had to be nice. Because Fiyori wanted to be open. Transparent. She wanted to be clear, so Coleen knew that she would have nothing to fear about Fiyori. If only she had never dropped their names. If only she could've shut up about that detail. If only Fiyori could just ignore everything Coleen had said. Everything, ignore everything and pretend everything was alright. Even with Bernadette dead, Fiyori could have pretended everything was alright. But now she couldn't and it was all Coleen's fault.

That goddamn bitch should've just shut up and piss off.

"...no, I- I get it. I'm sorry, I get it."

Fiyori still wished she could just not breathe. She gazed at her hands. Gazed at them, hoping to stare long enough for her fingers to decay and fall off.

Isabel killed her friend. For that, Fiyori was able to hate her. Brendan, too, killed Fiyori's friend. But Brendan was a friend as well, not some stuck-up bitch she didn't like to begin with. She couldn't hate him. Or, she wouldn't hate him. Didn't want to, so her mind played a small little trick. It took the scraps of info it had, and it weaved them into a tale that would satisfy her conscientiousness. A tale where she knew how Bernadette died. A tale where she knew that Brendan wasn't involved at all.

But he was. And Coleen reminded her of it.

"I... ah, hahaha, of course. I get it. I get it. Get it. Gotten it. Yea, completely got it. Ahaha... man, this- this sucks so much. I... I... goddamnit... ah, hehehe."

Fiyori reached for the collar around her neck. She yanked at it, and yet still she breathed. Tears fell down her face, and yet still she breathed.

Bern was dead. And Brendan killed her.

For the first time, in a long time, did the violence of truth's nature itself throw all its might at Fiyori.
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Fiyori kept her hold on the collar. She tugged, and even with all the force she could muster, nothing happened. Nothing, except the collar pressing on her neck. Nothing, except her fingernails - now over-grown and dirty - digging into her throat.

"Da- damnit, hahaha... I can't. I just can't. I ca-ahahaha..."

Yet she breathed still. Yet she cried still. Yet she pulled still.

And then Fiyori could hear something fall on the floor. And she could see Coleen lunge forward. She didn't have time to react. Or formulate some kind of thought. Fiyori's wrists were already fixed by Coleen. Fiyori's hands, however, remained clinging to the collar.

She met Coleen's eyes. It was just at that moment that Fiyori realized that Coleen existed.

"It's a loa-ahaha- it's a load of bull, Coleen. Heh, hahaha... this is good! This is bad! This is evil and this is just! Ahahaha... I've been thinking so much. And it's all a load of bullshit! Bullshit... ahahaha..."

Fiyori closed her eyes. It hurt. Yet she breathed still. She let go of the collar.
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"Yea..."

Coleen let go of Fiyori's hands. Fiyori held them close to her throat for a moment. Not at her collar, but still touching the vulnerable flesh of the neck. She waited a second - or maybe it was a bit more or a bit less than that. Then she placed on hand on her lap, and used the other to wipe away her tears.

At first, she wasn't sure if she should, or could keep the eye contact with Coleen. Her eyes were starting to dart aimlessly around the room, until Fiyori scolded herself and forced her eyes to remain on Coleen.

It helped.

There were still too many problems to solve, too many riddles to be played and too many questions to be answered. But listening to Coleen helped. Helped soothe Fiyori when she had this emotional outburst. That was a good thing. And yet again, there was this urge. She wanted to talk, and tell Coleen all about it. About how much she hated life back in Kingman. How most of it was just a blur of constant misery. How these spontaneous suicidal motions weren't so unusual. Or that she had been planning to kill herself anyway come graduation day. How hilarious the fact was that Fiyori was still alive on day seven of Survival of the Fittest when she didn't want to live at all.

Fiyori gulped. She rejected that urge. It would do no good. It would've never done any good.

"...thanks. Sorry for this. It's- I am sorry you had to see this. Pretty pathetic, huh?"

She halted for a moment, wiping away another tear.

"Ty... you mentioned him. How's he doing..?"
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"I see. That's good to hear."

Simple, brief, and finally an answer to summarize her feelings in a succinct manner. Ty seemed to do well, even with all the hurt he must have been suffering. And furthermore, he had been unmentioned on the announcements thus far. It was something that made Fiyori happy, even if she knew that might change soon.

She wasn't sure how to feel about that.

Coleen continued, Fiyori replied. They both giggled. "Ah, you shouldn't say that. You're still pretty... pretty!" There w a joke about how half of their classmates would be looking worse anyway. Fiyori wasn't sure how that kind of humor would've landed with Coleen, though.

The truth was that Fiyori actually noticed little of her scars. There were enough noises for her senses to suffer from. The sight of her classmates' bodies, the stench of their corpses. The sound of people dying, and the distant but ever-present wail of sorrow. The cold chill of the island, and the permanent grey light.

Coleen's scars were nothing in comparison.
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Fiyori gave Coleen a smile - a forced one, maybe; she wasn't much sure about that one herself - and trailed the girl's movement with her eyes. Fiyori would've said that she really meant it, and even though she did not, it felt like it was the truth. Funny enough, had she actually said it, she'd have considered it a lie.

For the moment, a nod had to do it. A nod, and the smile.

When Coleen mentioned the issue of body odor, Fiyori couldn't help but instinctively reach for her armpits and take a deep breath. She regretted doing so very much immediately. Tears swelled up again as she took in the stench of her own old sweat. It was utterly revolting. Fiyori bolted back, and with such a force that she nearly tripped backwards over the chair. Fortunately, her backpack served as an anchor, somehow.

She cracked up, knowing the absurd scene she just delivered.

"Well, guess they figured we'd just take a bath. Would almost do it myself if it wasn't so cold."
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"No, afraid I haven't."

The conversation returned to a more somber and serious tone. Fiyori bit her lip. She knew that Alessio had killed. She had no idea about his current mental state, however, and Coleen's tone made it difficult to read into her relationship with him.

Though Fiyori allowed herself to hazard a guess. Whatever Coleen felt, whatever she wanted from Alessio, it wasn't positive.

"If I find him, should I tell him something?"
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Fiyori understood.

Coleen hadn't said nothing of the sort, but Fiyori understood what she truly wanted. It had been a similar place Fiyori had been in, and still was. Well, either way Coleen played it off, and Fiyori chose not to pursue her on it. There was no further need to say anything on the matter.

A silence filled the room again. Fiyori jumped back and forth between trying to look into Coleen's eyes, and studying the markings on her face. She wondered if she could ask Coleen about them. Or if she should. Probably not, given all the rules of polite society but still...

She noticed someone coming. Fiyori had hoped that this little sanctuary would last a while longer, but unfortunately it could not. Ah, perhaps it was better that way. She still had things to do, people to find. But not yet to her. Granted, her appearance surprised Fiyori. The implications of them were huge, but for the meanwhile Fiyori enjoyed the dumb expression on the arrival's face. Probably didn't like what she saw.

Well, guess what? Fiyori wasn't liking it either.

"Well Coleen, looks like you got someone here."

Fiyori lifted herself from the chair, stretching her limbs and yawning intensively. She lurched over to the door, passing the guest. She would have said something to her. Fiyori even knew a few things that could be said. But unfortunately, Fiyori had quite terrible images in her head. Vicious, brutal images. In the end, Fiyori would rather not have them.

And for that she had to leave.

[[Fiyori Senay, continued in Love Runs Out]]
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