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The Virgin Sea; -private for now-
Topic Started: Feb 20 2017, 01:52 PM (668 Views)
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Oh no. No, no, no, not this. Anything but this.

((Lily Caldwell continued from End of the Line.))

One moment, Lily had been following Isabel. Looking around and wondering if her remaining supplies were still buried around here. Not calm. Not relaxed. But as close to it as she’d been since the start of this game And the next moment everything had done a complete 180.

Lily had been expecting, perhaps, to hear Lizzie or Emma on the announcements. She hadn’t been looking forward to it, but if that had happened… well, it had to happen, didn’t it? But not this. Not Lizzie turning up in front of her, in front of Isabel, making a beeline right for them.

Lily said nothing. Although her eyes were so wide in fear that the whites could be seen all around. She gripped the strap of her bag like it was the only rope keeping her from plummeting off a cliff.

How could you. Lily didn’t know if it was directed at Isabel or at Lily herself. Maybe both. And what could she say? ‘I’m biding my time?’ She couldn’t say that in front of Isabel, it’d get her killed.

Lily took a step back, stepping just barely out of Isabel’s sight, before mouthing at Lizzie to go. Run. Or be peaceful, as much as it pained to do so.

Anything that wouldn’t make this Tina all over again.
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It was out there now. Not only had Lizzie not run, but she’d exploded on Isabel. Saying so many insults that Lily had wanted to say. But things that Isabel would never accept and walk away from. And in the midst of that rant, she’d turned her anger on Lily.

Now Isabel had to know. Lizzie had said ‘our family.’

This burning ball of shame had buried itself in Lily’s stomach since Tina’s death, sending out little molten waves whenever it got too quiet. It receded a little once she had made the decision to kill Isabel, then gotten worse once she’d allied with her. And now Lizzie’s words had just detonated it.

Lily only had the justification of ‘I was biding my time’ and ‘I wanted to live’ and it just seemed so flimsy while staring right at her cousin screaming at her. She looked down. Might have stared down, not meeting Lizzie’s eyes, for a long time if Isabel hadn’t started up.

No. Nonono. Isabel was moving forward, and she was laughing, and talking in words that made no sense. Lily looked up to see Lizzie backing away, and Isabel keeping the space between them. Talking calmly, too calmly.

It was going to happen again.

Lily was just going to let it happen, like she had with Tina.

“No.”

Not defiant. Too shaky, too soft, to be anything but begging. Might not have even been noticed if Lily hadn’t taken a couple of rushed steps forward and grabbed Isabel’s arm, circling her tiny, stick arms around as tightly as she could and anchoring her useless, tired feet as well as she could in the sand.

“Don’t. Just… please.”
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“I know! I know, I…”

There was too much Lily couldn’t say. She wanted Lizzie to know why she was with Isabel, she didn’t want Lizzie to look at her like that, like she was some kind of confusing, mutated monster. Of course she knew what Isabel had done. She’d seen it. How could she not know?

She tried to stop Isabel, but there was nothing she could do. Isabel just didn’t want to stop, and Lily was nothing but twigs and leaves to be brushed aside. The first push was nothing, but the last one sent Lily tumbling proper.

Her hands scrabbled over the ground, hoping for something. A rock like the one Lizzie had tripped on. Something. Anything. So she could do something!

But she couldn’t. There was nothing.

There was a squelching noise. Lily could only cover her face and try to block it out, but she couldn’t block out the… the noises. Couldn’t block out that it was Lizzie. The others… Steve, Asha, Astrid, she could block out the details, but not Lizzie.

And it wasn’t over. Why wasn’t it over? Why would she wish for it to be over?

Lily peeked through her fingers, and a strained sob escaped her throat, though the sound was lost under the sound of Lizzie crying out. Isabel was stomping on the wound, she was also talking, again she was talking, why was she always talking, but for once she was saying something important, if not in the way that Lily had ever wanted.

Easy? It’d be easy to kill Lizzie? What kind of… what kind of person was Isabel? To think that murdering her own cousin could be easy? She knew Isabel was evil, was stupid, and didn’t seem to understand why anyone would want to kill her but… but this...

She couldn’t kill Lizzie. Her names would be all over the announcement. Emma would know. Her family would hear. And she just couldn’t do that… leaving Tina to die, that was bad, but taking the weapon to Lizzie herself? Lizzie, who grew up with?

The sickle was lying next to her. Lily reached out with a badly-shaking hand and touched the handle.

Isabel might kill her if Lily didn’t do as she said. And even if she didn’t, Isabel had the supplies. Isabel was her only protection. And… and wasn’t Lizzie already bleeding? Wasn’t Isabel making Lizzie hurt? Didn’t that mean Lizzie would never survive long enough, anyway?

Was it murder, really? Would it really be her fault? She couldn't save Lizzie properly, so... so she'd just be sparing Lizzie some pain and saving herself in the process, wouldn't she? It wouldn't be her fault.

Lily got to her feet. She took two steps forward. Holding the sickle close. It was sticky and red and she wanted to vomit. Tears were trickling down her face, snot dribbling from her nose, and Lily didn’t know how long she’d been crying for.

Lizzie was staring at her. Still staring at her with that… that look.

Lily didn’t want to be stared at like that. Lily didn’t want to see what she was going to do. It wasn’t her fault. It wasn’t her fault! She closed her eyes so she wouldn’t have to see it any more.

She swung the sickle wildly, aiming to slash the throat and put Lizzie out of her misery. She might have hit target, except that she’d closed her eyes. She missed the throat. But she didn’t miss Lizzie entirely.
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She hadn’t even gotten it right. She didn’t have to open her eyes to know that. All she’d done was make the pain worse. And Isabel was telling her to try again, and there was another squelching noise.

“Stop it!” Lily’s whimpered demand for Isabel to stop stomping on Lizzie like that was drowned out by a new voice. Lily cracked one of her eyes open to see who it was, immediately regretting it when she saw the bloody mess that Lizzie was.

It was Coleen. Lily had completely forgotten she was still alive. Lily’s brain, stunned by everything that was happening, couldn’t really focus on why Coleen running at them was important. Didn’t notice the gun, didn’t really think.

Even when Isabel grabbed her hand, Lily only really left because Isabel yanked her away. Feet only moving enough to stop her from falling over from the force.

The last thing she saw on the shoreline was Lizzie, burned into her brain like a brand.

It wasn’t her fault. She hadn’t… she hadn’t wanted… hadn’t meant…

((Lily Caldwell continued in The World's an Ugly Place, but I'm Still Afraid to Die.))
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