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Sometimes when we reach for the stars...; Spring of 2014
Topic Started: Sep 20 2016, 06:13 AM (725 Views)
Maraoone
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COMIN OUT OF MY CAGE AND I'VE BEEN DOIN JUST FINE
[ *  *  * ]
As the second hand drifted past 2 on her watch, Olivia began to regret everything.

First off, she should've prioritized fixing her watch back home because she knew that it was behind by, what, thirty seconds, one minute, two minutes? God forbid five minutes. Or no, maybe she was misremembering, maybe it wasn't the khaki fabric watch she was wearing that was delayed, but the leather one. Or perhaps the blue one? No, she was sure that that one was on time, she'd just aligned it with the school clock two days ago. You know, for a watchmaker, she sure was bad at keeping time. Like, how could she expect to run a watchmaking shop when she couldn't even tell her watches and minutes and seconds apart and, no, she was walking too slow, she shouldn't even be thinking about this.

She picked up her pace and half-walked, half-jogged, weaving in and out the crowd of students going to their own classes.

Another thing she regretted was choosing a math class on the second floor that ended right before lunch. Like, sure, she and Latanna hadn't even planned the whole study group thing with Rod back then, but maybe she should've thought about how the library and west wing were on opposite sides of the building, or at least it seemed like it, and now the second hand was drifting past six, and she still wasn't sure if it was on time or if they were all there already, just waiting for her, tapping their fingers while waiting for her, and the library was in sight, she could see it, and yes, she was in now.

Olivia strode towards their table, sat next to Latanna, and dropped her bag next to her seat. It was a minor relief to her that Rod wasn't there yet, meant she wasn't the last one to come. She hoped that Latanna didn't notice her sweat, or how flushed her face was. She looked at her, tried to read her face. Was she late? Had Latanna been waiting here by herself for a long time? She looked down at her watch. Ten seconds till 11:45. Too close.

So, she looked at Latanna. Still couldn't read her expression. And she asked, "Am I late?"
V6 Characters:
G062 - Olivia Fischer prayed a thousand prayers in Ye Not [37/107]
Previous Threads: Sæglópur - Until all our yesterdays are lighted fools... - the way to dusty death - a concrete cave - I'd Say That I've Had Worse Days, but Then I'd Be Lying - Get Me Away From Here, I'm Dying - Until Then, You Are Free - Cast in the Name of God
Memories: Sometimes when we reach for the stars...
Weapon: Lobotomy pick.

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"Mara was a mistake." - Cicada, 2017
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Maraoone
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COMIN OUT OF MY CAGE AND I'VE BEEN DOIN JUST FINE
[ *  *  * ]
((May edit content, but dialogue/actions will remain the same.))

If it weren't for the fact that this was Latanna she was talking about, Olivia would have thought that Rod and Latanna had somehow become a thing. After all, both she and Olivia had nothing in common with Rod aside from the fact that they happened to have the same history class. Different interests, different friends, different languages, different worlds.

Olivia still leaned back slightly whenever Rod came close, a part of her keeping in mind his rather fiery temper. Of course, she knew him better than that now after a few months of this studying arrangement. He was no longer just some variable defined by his wrestling career and his temper and his face and all, Olivia knew that there were some brains and soul behind all that muscle. It was just mere instinct, that's what it was. And Olivia was better than this. So, she righted herself into a normal sitting position, pretended that she hadn't moved back.

And then her shoulders relaxed as Latanna started zipping from one topic to another, her voice somewhat perky. They weren't late. Nothing had gone wrong so far. Great. Olivia tried to keep up with all the questions Latanna was asking, but she'd barely open her mouth before Latanna moved on to the next one, leaving Olivia with unsaid words tumbling, piling up in her throat. She'd started wondering if she should answer them all sequentially or just answer the most recent one when Latanna mentioned something about Sadies.

Her eyebrows scrunched together. She leaned closer.

Asked if she'd given one yet.

Olivia laughed, and then stopped herself as soon as she started. She frowned a bit, looked at Latanna. Was she insulted? That wasn't what she meant, it was just. Like, even if Olivia somehow summoned up the confidence required for that, even if she were to give a card to, say, Rod- no, not him, he's right there and your face is blushing, stop- or some other guy, that implied something odd. To give that card would mean that she'd think she'd have a chance. That she'd think herself to be ready for relationships, boys, etc. That she'd be worthy.

That simply wasn't true.

She looked at Latanna with a tight smile, and said, "Sorry, I'm not laughing at you or your question, it's just... no, I don't plan on giving anything."

She looked down.

"It's too weird."

She looked at Rod, tried to smile bright again. "How about you? Have you gotten anything?"
V6 Characters:
G062 - Olivia Fischer prayed a thousand prayers in Ye Not [37/107]
Previous Threads: Sæglópur - Until all our yesterdays are lighted fools... - the way to dusty death - a concrete cave - I'd Say That I've Had Worse Days, but Then I'd Be Lying - Get Me Away From Here, I'm Dying - Until Then, You Are Free - Cast in the Name of God
Memories: Sometimes when we reach for the stars...
Weapon: Lobotomy pick.

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"Mara was a mistake." - Cicada, 2017
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Maraoone
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COMIN OUT OF MY CAGE AND I'VE BEEN DOIN JUST FINE
[ *  *  * ]
Truth be told, Olivia had stopped paying much attention to their discussion after Rod shot her that look, that raised eyebrow that told her that he'd noticed, that she was an open book. She just looked at her book, continued reading and re-reading through the pages, somewhat hoping that she'd sink into them. Besides, they were talking about Sadie's, and there was no chance that anyone would ever want to be with her, or that she'd even be allowed to go there. It was the type of thing her mother would describe as lewd, improper like Latanna said. So why bother talking about it?

And like that, she continued, just staring at the pages. But the words Rod and Latanna traded didn't completely escape her, and indeed, her ears perked up when she heard mention of tribes and the government. Her fingers stopped flipping pages completely as Latanna continued. It wasn't so much disagreement, offense taken that made her stop. In fact, she and Latanna were rather in step when it came to worldviews. It was who she was directing those words that made her tense, tense in the way she would be while re-watching some film, at the minutes before the break-up, the car crash, the downfall. And while a wiser, more prudent part of Olivia stopped herself from speaking, another part wanted to stop this car crash, to keep things civil, alright, fine.

And then Rod's phone buzzed, and he left. And Olivia was left wondering whether he really needed to take that, or if he had just found a nice excuse to leave them behind. It was probably the former, but her mind was still buzzing with what-ifs, with things she should have done to keep him from leaving. Her mind was still filled with guilt.

It took her a few seconds before Latanna's remark registered, before she realized there was supposed to be an answer. A few seconds for the question to hang there, waiting. And it left her a bit confused.

"I-I thought we-" and then she remembered that Latanna had been part of the planning for this, that at the very least, she'd want to see the results of her hard work. "I mean, like." And then she found what Latanna really meant, the statement behind the statement, and she realized what she had said, and she didn't mean it, and, "Sorry, no, I just know I had no plans on it." And she looked back at Latanna, hoping she hadn't said anything wrong, but knowing she probably had.
V6 Characters:
G062 - Olivia Fischer prayed a thousand prayers in Ye Not [37/107]
Previous Threads: Sæglópur - Until all our yesterdays are lighted fools... - the way to dusty death - a concrete cave - I'd Say That I've Had Worse Days, but Then I'd Be Lying - Get Me Away From Here, I'm Dying - Until Then, You Are Free - Cast in the Name of God
Memories: Sometimes when we reach for the stars...
Weapon: Lobotomy pick.

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"Mara was a mistake." - Cicada, 2017
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Maraoone
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COMIN OUT OF MY CAGE AND I'VE BEEN DOIN JUST FINE
[ *  *  * ]
"Nothing."

Olivia's hands gripped the book, her fingertips white. What exactly did Latanna see? What was she looking at? Well, obviously, she was half-looking at the book, half-looking at Olivia, examining her, seeing. But what did she really see? Did she see that remark hidden within 'we' as some attack on her, as a betrayal, as her siding with Rod? Olivia could see how it could come across as that, but she didn't mean it, she didn't mean a word of that, she would never do that to her friend, and she was sorry, and she meant

"Nothing at all."

And the only thing Olivia wanted to see that moment was the paragraph she had been reading before then. The whites between the lines, surrounding the serifs.
V6 Characters:
G062 - Olivia Fischer prayed a thousand prayers in Ye Not [37/107]
Previous Threads: Sæglópur - Until all our yesterdays are lighted fools... - the way to dusty death - a concrete cave - I'd Say That I've Had Worse Days, but Then I'd Be Lying - Get Me Away From Here, I'm Dying - Until Then, You Are Free - Cast in the Name of God
Memories: Sometimes when we reach for the stars...
Weapon: Lobotomy pick.

V5 Characters

Chat

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"Mara was a mistake." - Cicada, 2017
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Maraoone
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COMIN OUT OF MY CAGE AND I'VE BEEN DOIN JUST FINE
[ *  *  * ]
Back in elementary, when Olivia had started to open herself up more to people, when she had started reforming herself, one of the people who had spurred on that reform, who had helped shape her into what she was as of now was Latanna. Latanna was one of those people Olivia was drawn to, and back then, back in fourth grade, it was because she thought she was smart.

They both had nothing to hide when the report cards came home. They both competed for attention in the classroom when the teacher waited for an answer. They were both smart, right? But as Olivia found company with her in the cafeterias, as they studied together and ranted about group projects, as she drifted into engineering and Latanna, into politics, Olivia discovered that 'smart' wasn't quite the right word to describe her. It was like calling the sky 'blue' rather than 'cerulean' or something like that. Accurate, yes, but one word was a better fit than another. And in this case, that word was 'sharp'. 'Sharp' as in 'mentally acute', as in 'very observant'.

'Sharp' as in sharp hearing, a sharp vision cutting into Olivia, autopsying her.

Latanna sounded perfectly normal right now, but she was still digging into her. She knew. And Olivia knew there was no point in hiding it. Rod had just showed her she was an open book. Exposed.

"I just thought you really weren't going."

She blurted it, said it like a tongue twister. Then, she looked at Latanna again. An alibi, that was what she needed.

"You did just call it improper."

Olivia continued to look at her. And she braced herself.
V6 Characters:
G062 - Olivia Fischer prayed a thousand prayers in Ye Not [37/107]
Previous Threads: Sæglópur - Until all our yesterdays are lighted fools... - the way to dusty death - a concrete cave - I'd Say That I've Had Worse Days, but Then I'd Be Lying - Get Me Away From Here, I'm Dying - Until Then, You Are Free - Cast in the Name of God
Memories: Sometimes when we reach for the stars...
Weapon: Lobotomy pick.

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Chat

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"Mara was a mistake." - Cicada, 2017
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
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