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David Schwartz
Topic Started: Aug 12 2016, 07:55 PM (304 Views)
MK Kilmarnock
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Hate, hate, HATE!!!
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Hey there, Poly. Now that your formatting is all squared away we'll deal with what's left and you'll be good to go.

Add what David was wearing on the day of abduction so people have a clearer picture of what he looks like.

About at what time did he start reading his grandparent's history books? For a really young kid, that sort of thing might be too complicated. Also what drew him specifically to the Founding Fathers and WWII as time periods of interest since they're pretty far apart in time?

When you say his grandparents had "movie tapes" do you mean VHS tapes? What kind of modern comedies does he like since we've got some great examples of his taste in old cinema?

I'd like some more detail on the camping David and his dad do, since it's a pretty big advantage. How long has his dad been doing it? How long have they been camping together? How long to they stay out? To what degree are they roughing it on these trips? How often do they go on trips? If he's only learned about trapping small animals, but never done it, he's not going to be successful.

When I saw "learning" up top in the interests and hobbies I thought it was sort of vague and made a mental note to see how it was expanded on in the profile. The "learning" he likes, which seems to be making friends and learning about people and their interests, fits pretty neatly into "socializing" which is already up there. Go ahead and remove that from the interests and hobbies list.

Does rejection hurt him or does he feel hurt if people think he's annoying?

Since he's past reading his grandparent's history books, where does he go for history now?

Fiction writing isn't a class on its own, so is it English he struggles with sometimes?

Why doesn't he run for elected office? He seems really into civic participation and he loves to socialize, so what's holding him back?

What are David's plans after high school? Also his mom kind of drops off the face of the earth after the first part of the profile, so more info on their relationship would be good. Does she get after him since he's got stringy long hair and she's a hairdresser?

What's his friend situation? Does he have any close friends or does he just have a ton of people he talks to and is friendly with, or some combination of the two?

It says in the advantages that when he sets himself on a goal he's persistent, but there isn't much of that in the profile. Is there an example of that?

Also, there's not a ton about is formative years. What was he like in school and with peers growing up?

That's it. Mostly just asking for elaboration on different points. Post when you're done and I'll take another look.
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