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Bernadette Thomas; The character I've actually written, whoo!
Topic Started: Feb 15 2016, 08:21 PM (163 Views)
Deamon
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Hey Ime! I'll be critiquing Bernadette for you! She's looking pretty good right now but is Denied as there are a couple of details that require expansion.


What drove Bernadette to step in to help people being bullied? I ask because it appears to be a major part of her character and personality but there doesn't seem to be any reason given as to why.


When Bernadette became more active in the bullying incidents she got involved with did this lead to any response from the school? As in my experience normally if there's a shouting match both people can be punished for it.


That's literally it though, so post back here when you have those done and I'll take another look at Bernadette for you!
Kimiko Kao - - - - - - - The Lagniappe
Travis "Trav" Lynch - - They Stumbled Into Faith and Thought
Cameron Herrig - Ω - Ω - Shock Me

V5
Unknowns
"They'll tell you failure is not an option. That is ridiculous. Failure is always an option. Failure is the most readily available option at all times. But it's a choice. You can choose to fail. You can choose to succeed."
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Deamon
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This character biography has had no alterations for more than two weeks and has been put in the abandoned characters forum. This profile is eligible for resubmission by the handler upon alterations requested by the staff.
Kimiko Kao - - - - - - - The Lagniappe
Travis "Trav" Lynch - - They Stumbled Into Faith and Thought
Cameron Herrig - Ω - Ω - Shock Me

V5
Unknowns
"They'll tell you failure is not an option. That is ridiculous. Failure is always an option. Failure is the most readily available option at all times. But it's a choice. You can choose to fail. You can choose to succeed."
Offline Profile Goto Top
 
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