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Every day is great at your Junes; NANAKO F-FETCH ME SOME S-SAUSAGES (Open!)
Topic Started: May 9 2015, 04:08 AM (3,528 Views)
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[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
((CAEDYN MILLER: DYNAMIC ENTRY))

"~Alvaro honey, I'm home~"

The sharp voice drifted into the room on an off-key lilt as the door swung open into the coffee shop. The customers didn't know it yet, but business just picked right the heck up, baby. Caedyn sashayed her way in, glancing out over the tables to see who was in for service.

Oh helloooooooo.

Wasn't this just a perfect scene. Alvaro, her beloved compatriot in caffeine, Jasper, her very bestest furriend, Lily, ~the one that got away~, and...some other chick whose name escaped her? Forget her, she wasn't important. Maybe. It'd get sorted out eventually. Right now, this was the perfect time to stir up a scene.

Alvaro's mad crushing on Lily, which is just...eeeeewwww, right? He and Jaspie would be so much cuter. Like, god, so adorable. Their babies would be so shareable, I can't even right now. Gotta make this happen!

The biggest grin she could manage pasted onto her face as she squealed out with excitement. "Lily! Jah, it's been foreves, girl! How have you beeeen?"

As she wandered over to the table, she shot Jasper an on-the-sly, totally subtle wink. Don't worry bruh-man. I got this.
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Oh Lily. So cool. So aloof. So mysterious. She always liked that about her, sort of, except when it pissed her off. It pissed her off a lot, come to think of it, but that didn't matter. Right now, it was cute again, and that was all that was important. Alvaro had bailed once she showed up, so he was out of Lily's clutches and she was into Caedyn's. It was show time.

Or so she thought, until Little Miss What's Her Problem got all uppity and tense about...plates, or whatever. Like it was her problem that they were done? This fab uniform doesn't come with a ball and chain, girl.

She was about to lay into whoever this chick was when she had a rare, beautiful, stupendous moment of clarity. Rudegirl was eating with Lily, and watching Lily, and all uppity because she talked to Lily. Did she know about...them? And if she did, did that mean they were...?

Oh. My. God. So edible. This is the best day.

That had to be it. They were...y'know, like that. Totally like that. It was so obvious now that she stopped and thought about it. It explained why Lily was so uncomfortable, and Bitchyface was so bitchyface. She'd caught her exie with her new main squeeze! God, she could just scream with how perfect this was working out for her. Sometimes, it was amazing how brilliant she was.

It hadn't occurred to her that she had been standing there with a giant smile on her face, glancing back and forth between Lily and Lily's Cutesy CuddleMuffin for more than a few seconds while she thought things through, and it still hadn't occurred to her to unfreeze yet. She was too lost in the serendipity of the moment.
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Twitch.

Twitch.

Twitch.

Caedyn's happiness for Lily was quickly shattered as her new beau decided to crank the bitch factor up to 11. Who the fuck talks like that to another human being, anyway? So rude. Clearly she didn't have any idea who she was dealing with, or she'd back up and take some thought before she opened her stupid mouth. She better not had been talking to Alvaro that way, that was for sure. Maybe it was time somebody put her in her place.

Caedyn shot a look at Jasper before bending down over the table and placing her hands behind the dishes, staring into the other girls eyes with a big, sickly sweet smile. "Listen, bomboclat," she began in a mocking, sing-song voice. "Maybe you're new here, but I'm not your slave girl, 'kay? So if I wanna stop in and say hello to my best friend and my ex, you don't get to say word one unless it's real pretty and polite. You got a problem with that, find someone who cares, jah?" Long fingertips slipped against the stack of plates and slid them across the table in front of the girl. "You need these gone right this second, take them yourself. I'm busy."
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The Wild Bitchface shows signs of hesitance as the mighty Cassowary towers over it. This is not its natural environment, and it knows it has overstepped its bounds. This hesitance shall prove to be its fatal act, as it should either show decisive aggression or submission, attack or retreat. There is no room within the Cassowary's territory for weakness.

The Bitchface believes itself safe due to the presence of its packmate, the Bookworm. The Bookworm is a frequent denizen of the Cassowary's habitat, and the Bitchface hopes to buy safe passage through its presence. Our studies show this may be a miscalculation, however, as the symbiotic relationship between the Bookworm and the Cassowary turned parasitic many years ago, and now there is little but enmity between the pair. This may be the end for both creatures now, unless an alternative appears. Let's watch.

----

Lily was being a real buzzkill today. First she salted Jasper's game with Alvaro, probably, and now she was trying to defend her new whatever and get Caedyn to back out of her own cafe? Fine. Alvaro was out of her tiny little clutches anyway. Mission successful, in her book.

"Lily," Caedyn began in a chipper voice, "sweetie, whatever made you think I was here to distract you? I was just being polite...something your new girlfriend could use a few lessons in, if you're not too busy." She let out a small giggle and shook her dreads as she sat up and turned towards Jasper. "Jaspie! Don't hide from me, you! Why didn't you tell me you were coming today?"

----

Dominance asserted, the Cassowary continues to patrol her domain. The Bookworm and the Bitchface will be spared...today. As long as they proceed with caution and do not startle the Cassowary, no harm should come to them. Truly, this tense pact between her children is one of nature's many surprises.
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[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
A wagging finger came up as she eyed Jasper teasingly. "How could you forget about me? I'm hurt, I really am." She clutched at her chest and let out a sigh. "My poor broken heart will just have to go on." The floor shifted under her feet as she sat back up and looked around the mostly empty cafe. "Not to me, though I guess we got graced with the lovebirds here, huh?"

Caedyn wandered over to the counter for a rag and started cleaning up the tables around Jasper. Maybe it was time for a little information gathering. Adelaide and Lily had both beat right out after her little comment, which was...intriguing, to say the least. If she had to guess, somebody had a secret. Of course, it was her duty to respect that and only share it with a few dozen of her closest friends and followers. Jasper might be able to tell her a little more before she started, though.

"Say, Jasper..." she began, leaning on the table behind him and smiling innocently. "Who was that, anyway? The snippy brunette that Lily was with?"
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Adelaide, Adelaide, Adelaide. She'd remember that one. Maybe write it down a few hundred times to make sure of that. If only she'd gotten a picture of them together...still, she could draw one, right? This rumor was way, way too juicy to let die that easily. There'd be this whole mock-up, like...

Yes. Yes, this would do perfectly. Caedyn couldn't help but grin at the thought of what she'd get up to once she went back home. She was drawn from her plotting by Jasper's questioning, though. Had she never told him about her and Lily? It must have just slipped her mind. No reason to keep it a big secret though. "Oh Jaspie," she remarked with a wink, "I definitely knew Lily, if you get what I mean." Caedyn turned back to the table and kept cleaning it as she talked. "We dated for a little while, like a few months. Lily doesn't really, like, people, though? So eventually I wore her right out."
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Caedyn gave Jasper a nod as he tried to plot out the timeline between her and Lily. It really was odd that it'd slipped past her for so long without telling him, but it wasn't a big deal. Lily probably wouldn't mind. "Mmmhmm, like, around then? I think I was doing the whole goth thing then. Ugh, what a drag."

The unfashionable memories were pushed back out of her mind by her renewed purpose. She'd need to put some things together when she got home, and maybe call a few people...especially him. God, there was no way she was going to do this without involving Olly. "Excuse moi, Jaspie, I've gotta check something," she said with a smile, clutching her phone in her palm as it slid from her pocket. She scrolled through her long contacts list and plucked out "Husbando~" with a tap of her finger.

Ollyollyolly Lils has a new gf, super bitchy, Adelaide? #plotslotsk

((Caedyn Miller Continued In The Tyranny of Grocery Bags))
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