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Corey Esposito
Topic Started: Jan 11 2013, 12:46 AM (245 Views)
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i'm not upset
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Hey Condor! You've got a temporarily denied, but for really small stuff. Corey's already pretty cool.

-Corey has no skin tone!
- We're trying to get rid of parenthetical phrasing in profiles. So take out the stuff in the parenthesis in the interests and hobbies and just list "video game club" as on of them. Also "The internet" is a little vague. Add something more specific?

-I'd like a little elaboration on his relationship to his family. I also think the fact that they own an Italian restaurant is really cute. Did Corey ever work there? Is that why he's so friendly?

- What kind of video games does he like? Can you throw in a few music game titles. Does he like Guitar Hero or Rhythm Heaven or DDR?

- His advantages are a little skimpy. His video game playing, especially since he plays games that require him to respond quickly might mean he has good relaxes or hand eye coordination. It also seems like he's kind of lackadaisical but smart. Intelligence would be an advantage. Also the thing listed in disadvantages seems like naiveté. Could I get a little bit about that trait in the bio?

- One last thing, and this ties into how he is with his parents: how do his parents feel about his kind of "meh" grades?

Not a ton to fix. Post when you're ready!
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