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The Youngest Was The Most Loved
Topic Started: Mar 21 2011, 07:04 PM (2,095 Views)
Chib
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Oh my god you guys The Riz killed Cara what do!?
[ *  *  * ]
(This is pretty much for the sake of having a new thread for the inevitable death herein. Feels wrong to have it follow right on from what happened in The Guilty Ones. And I'm pretty sure there's room for at least one more thread here anyway.)

[The Guilty Ones --> Ema Ryan]

Still in a light-headed fugue was Ema Ryan, as she trudged northwards along the beach. She didn't even know it was north, it didn't occur to her to check against the morning sun to see which way she was going. Just watch out for cliffs and listen for beeping, and everything'll be fine.

It hadn't even occurred to her to check if Hayley had gotten up to follow her or not. She was planning to go back after stretching her legs and getting some air in her lungs, after all, so it didn't really matter. What mattered was removing the hideous ache from her head, and walking it off was the only solution that Ema could think of. Have a walk around, breathe the sea air, maybe it'll improve. Have a drink of water afterwards. Something like that.

So Ema walked. Meandering about across the sand, with no real sense of purpose. Maybe she'd discuss the next destination with Hayley later. She didn't really want to discuss the prior night's events, but they'd probably come up too. That was part of the reason for the walk, putting off the inevitable morning-after conversation.

The awkwardness coming up soon slipped from Ema's addled mind, though, as she noticed the patterns left in her footprints, entirely meaningless lines that somehow brought a smile to her face. She couldn't begin to guess why. Leaving an impression, even a temporary one, on the island, maybe? That sounded poetic enough. But it was no time for waxing poetic, Ema just wanted to turn her brain off for a little while.

She wanted to walk.

So she did.
Every time you fall asleep you die. Someone else wakes up in your body, thinking they're you.
You are alone and trapped in your own mind, the world around you is your lie.
Soon you will be nothing, you will never again hear sounds, never again see colours, never again be anyone.


Riley Moon appreciates that Action Needs an Audience, but it's hard not to watch. Hair Status: Bubblegum Pink
Parallel with: The Heavy Weapons Guy

The Past
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Chib
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Oh my god you guys The Riz killed Cara what do!?
[ *  *  * ]
And, just like that, Ema wasn't alone.

She'd perceived... something, something on the horizon, a few minutes ago. She wasn't sure what it was, and dismissed it without thinking much past It's probably a bird, or a trick of the light, or something. But that was a few minutes ago. The something had slipped out of Ema's line of sight fairly quickly, and she'd been content to carry on disregarding it.

For a few minutes, she walked, she hummed a little, she failed to notice Hayley trying to catch up. She took her gun out of her inside pocket and studied it with minor interest, looking over the odd curves of the so-called raygun, staring for a second or two at the interestingly placed safety.

And then that something came back into view. A lot closer than the horizon, this time. It wasn't a bird either. Or a mirage. Or anything else small, inconsequential or imaginary.

It, or rather, she, was a person. A person running.

A person running in Ema's direction.

She panicked.

Later on, Ema would realise other little things about what had happened that morning. That she'd probably flipped out over seeing the red stains on the other girl's clothes was one of them, the only one that helped her justify her response. The other ones were less helpful. That the girl seemed to have been running in fear, or distress, nothing close to hostility at any rate. That she slowed down just after Ema started panicking. That she already seemed to be going down before Ema acted.

But that was later on. In that split second after perceiving a possible danger, all Ema could think about was how fortunate she was to already have her gun in her hand. How lucky that it seemed the "aggressor" didn't have a ranged weapon of her own. How easy it would be to pull the trigger and be safe for certain.

Yes, easy. It would be so easy to just point the death dispensing tool at the person she wanted to be dead, and make it so. That sense of importance, of power, was back. The godlike power to press down on a little sliver of metal, and end a life. And, according to her own fears, save her own.

So as Sapphire McLeod was coming to a stop, Ema Ryan's arms were coming up.

As she began to fall of her own accord, a hand raised to steady the weapon.

Sapphire dropped to her knees.

Ema interpreted it as trying to dodge.
She never considered that she hadn't even been noticed yet.
She adjusted her aim downwards, focusing on the chest.
Easiest target to hit.
Right hand gripping the handle.
Left hand on the trigger guard.
Safety off.
Steady.

A minuscule pause. A half-second of doubt.

She pulled the trigger.
Every time you fall asleep you die. Someone else wakes up in your body, thinking they're you.
You are alone and trapped in your own mind, the world around you is your lie.
Soon you will be nothing, you will never again hear sounds, never again see colours, never again be anyone.


Riley Moon appreciates that Action Needs an Audience, but it's hard not to watch. Hair Status: Bubblegum Pink
Parallel with: The Heavy Weapons Guy

The Past
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Chib
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Oh my god you guys The Riz killed Cara what do!?
[ *  *  * ]
A direct hit. Ema wasn't sure how to feel about that. Her mind gave her plenty of opportunity to form an opinion, seeing fit to show her the moment of impact in excruciating detail - her own fault for staring, she could easily have looked away - so she could make a well informed decision. She didn't know what she was supposed to be thinking, she'd just shot someone, and only just realised what that meant. How was she supposed to feel?

Sapphire dropped forwards onto her face, flat onto the sand, waves lapping at one arm stuck oddly outwards towards the sea. Such a strange sight. Ema had already seen plenty of people die, but never had a chance to truly take it in. The first time, she'd thrown up. After that, there had been running. Even with the boy they'd taken the gun from, she'd focused on anything but his body. But some morbid fascination had Ema's gaze fixed on Sapphire. On the slowly expanding red circle on her back, the way her body was so still, and yet not quite motionless.

She was still alive.

There was still a sliver of optimistic altruism left in Ema that hadn't yet been destroyed by cowardice and fear. Her first instinct was to run to the girl's side, see if she could be saved. It had been a blind panic, after all, she hadn't meant to kill her. Had she?

Ema was halfway through following that first instinct when common sense kicked in. Coming up to Sapphire's side, a sensible voice reminded her She's alive and I just shot her. She's going to be pissed. She backed up, out of grabbing range, hoping the wounded girl wasn't as well armed as she herself was. Fuck. What if she has a gun too? Ema didn't plan on finding out the answer to that. She took aim again, now for the head. Quick, efficient and certain. And if she's going to die because I freaked out, it might as well be as painless as possible.

The mercy kill side helped Ema get over what she was about to do. Thinking about it all later, she'd repeatedly cite that part as the reason it was okay. The reason she wasn't a psycho killer. It was a mistake that she did her level best to clean up. She didn't want to kill the girl. That's what she told herself.

Something hit the ground with a soft sound. Sapphire seemed to be saying something. She was moving. Ema panicked again, not quite so violently, but decisively. She stopped her wayward train of thought and focused. If that had been a pistol, I'd be dead.

She shook the doubts from her head.

Doubt could wait until later, when she was alive to consider them.

Ema took aim briefly, and fired.

The gun sounded, and she didn't look away. She couldn't tear her eyes off of the gruesome sight. Something in her mind told her she needed to see it, to be stronger. At that moment, it didn't help much at all. Ema dropped to her knees, knuckles white from gripping the handle of her gun. Perhaps to herself, all she could say was;

"I killed her?"
Every time you fall asleep you die. Someone else wakes up in your body, thinking they're you.
You are alone and trapped in your own mind, the world around you is your lie.
Soon you will be nothing, you will never again hear sounds, never again see colours, never again be anyone.


Riley Moon appreciates that Action Needs an Audience, but it's hard not to watch. Hair Status: Bubblegum Pink
Parallel with: The Heavy Weapons Guy

The Past
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Chib
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Oh my god you guys The Riz killed Cara what do!?
[ *  *  * ]
For the next however long it was, Ema remained motionless. Her body still moved, of course, breath continued to enter her lungs, her hands continued to tremble, her right in particular continued to grip onto her gun for dear life. But by and large, she didn't move. She knelt there, not sure how much time was passing, not much caring, just staring at the hole in Sapphire's head. I did that. She just couldn't quite process the reality, the gravity, of what had happened. She'd killed a person, that much was obvious, but what defied understanding was the finer details. She'd killed an innocent person, it seemed. In cold blood, as well. Granted, the second shot could be called mercy, but there was still no excuse for shooting the first time. What does this mean?

Ema couldn't comprehend the consequences of what she'd done that morning just yet, and so eventually, she stopped trying to. The most obvious answers were probably the most important either way; she was a murderer now, and she still had no intention of dying on the island. Ema assured herself she'd get over the shock of it all in due time, and she'd be better off for it. No faltering. I can feel remorse for all this when I'm in therapy back home. Getting back comes first. She told herself that, and tried her hardest to believe it, but it still didn't quite stick. Killing innocent, fleeing people had never been part of the plan. She was supposed to just survive until there were a few monsters left, and not have to feel bad at all about killing them. Becoming one of them had never been on her agenda.

"Er...Ema..."

Shit. Hayley's awake. Obviously.

The idea that Hayley was following her hadn't really occurred to Ema yet, she'd assumed the other girl would just be doing... something, back at the makeshift camp. She didn't have the faintest idea what, just something nondescript and unrelated to how I just bloody shot someone.

Right, put on a brave face, can't look like, well, like this, in front of your partner in crime. Heh, crime. Nice phrasing.

She climbed to her feet, slowly, but without incident. That was a relief, Ema had been worried she'd stumble, or worse, fall over, or worse still, fall over and land on the body. She turned around, the most blatantly forced smile in the world on her face. God, what do you say to someone after this? "Oh man I shot Marvin in the face"? No. Fuck.

"Uh... yeah. I think she's dead."

No shit, Sherlock. This. Is. Stupid.
Every time you fall asleep you die. Someone else wakes up in your body, thinking they're you.
You are alone and trapped in your own mind, the world around you is your lie.
Soon you will be nothing, you will never again hear sounds, never again see colours, never again be anyone.


Riley Moon appreciates that Action Needs an Audience, but it's hard not to watch. Hair Status: Bubblegum Pink
Parallel with: The Heavy Weapons Guy

The Past
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Chib
Member Avatar
Oh my god you guys The Riz killed Cara what do!?
[ *  *  * ]
"Come on, yeah? We shouldn't be here."

Hayley offered a hand. Ema stared at it for a few seconds, the cogs turning in her brain so very slowly. She was standing up, so it wasn't a helping to her feet thing, what else was it meant to mean? Oh right. A holding hands kind of thing.

"I...fuck, Ema, I'm sorry, but...I know it feels like shit. It gets...better."

It was all too much to come to terms with in one morning, she'd just killed someone, pretty much in cold blood, and now she was remembering that Ema and Hayley was maybe a thing again. Scratch off the murder part and change the setting to Minnesota, it would still be a huge thing to Ema. On an island full of killers and having just become one? It was a wonder Ema could think straight at all, never mind taking a while over it. But apparently it gets better. Really?

Well, that was coming from Hayley, the one that already had five times as much to feel guilty about. If either of them knew anything about what Ema was going through, it was her. So she decided to trust in that, and just keep that brave façade on for the time being, pretend everything's fine until it actually becomes that way.

"I guess so."

For the first few seconds, Ema was pleased that didn't come out in her now rather common dry croaky noise. Then she realised it had instead been in a slightly creepy monotone. Bugger. Well, it could be worse.

"So what do we do now? I... I don't really want to be here."

That was true enough, even not looking at it, being near the late Sapphire made Ema uncomfortable, worse so than proximity to Hayley's victims had been. She'd been getting used to it by the boy she'd taken the gun off of and I don't even remember his name... James? No, that was the first one. Fuck., but this, it was almost as bad as watching James die the morning after linking up with Hayley and Kyle. Though, thinking about it that way, maybe it would get better in time, she hadn't had much trouble robbing the figurative grave of Andrew Mitchell, after all. Ema didn't relish the thought of killing anyone else, and certainly hoped never to see a bullet to the head up close ever again, but... if it means surviving, what choice is there?

No choice at all, really. Ema kept her mind on that, tried not to dwell on whether or not she deserved to survive, focused on just doing it. It was the only real choice she could see being left to her.
Every time you fall asleep you die. Someone else wakes up in your body, thinking they're you.
You are alone and trapped in your own mind, the world around you is your lie.
Soon you will be nothing, you will never again hear sounds, never again see colours, never again be anyone.


Riley Moon appreciates that Action Needs an Audience, but it's hard not to watch. Hair Status: Bubblegum Pink
Parallel with: The Heavy Weapons Guy

The Past
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Chib
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Oh my god you guys The Riz killed Cara what do!?
[ *  *  * ]
"We should go get our stuff. I...should probably get some clothes on."

Yeah, being dressed and fully equipped, the first two steps towards a good day on Murder Island. After that came...

"And then we'll go...somewhere. Anywhere. Find Maddy and Alex and whoever else, yeah? Just..."

Staying on the move and finding your friends, steps three and four on the path to a lovely day out. Ema wasn't quite sure what was wrong with her just then, the supposed five stages of grief certainly didn't seem to be running their course. Of course, she hadn't suffered a personal loss, except that of her 7 day streak of not killing anyone. She'd started with confusion instead of denial, then moved into depression for a few seconds, then anger for a few fleeting milliseconds, only to be replaced by the perhaps more rational acceptance. For a few more seconds, she'd come to accept that she was now a killer. But after that came yet another stage, hard to label, too. She'd already started trivialising it, inwardly at least. Trying to make it out to be no big deal, as though it should be perfectly normal to shoot someone in the head on a Sunday morning.

Is it even Sunday? I've lost track of what day it was when we started already...

Regardless, they needed to keep moving. Ema tried to force the steady realisation that there was something deeply wrong with how she was responding to Sapphire's death from her mind, and followed Hayley's lead when taken by the hand, back to their impromptu not-really-a-camp, away from the source of her troubling new mindset. She gathered up the other two magazines that had come with her gun, put them in her pockets, figuring she might now need them sooner rather than later. Finally making the conscious decision to leave it be, she left her sword where it was in the duffle bag. She had a quick bite to eat, a mouthful of water to wash it down, whilst Hayley finished getting dressed.

And then they left. Ema wasn't sure how to feel about leaving the place behind. It had, after all, been the setting for just about everything truly important that had happened to her in the last week. She'd met up with the people that ensured she was still alive, she'd seen a dead body for the first time, she'd slept with Hayley, and finally, she'd made her first kill, all in the one small area. For all of this, she wasn't sure how to feel about it. The events that had transpired there essentially built up to the reasons she was still alive and physically well, as well as, well, sleeping with Hayley.

So, thinking about it as she headed back inland, Ema was slightly sad to leave the unassuming stretch of sand behind. But she needed to move on, in more ways than one.

[Ema Ryan --> Everyday Is Like Sunday]
Every time you fall asleep you die. Someone else wakes up in your body, thinking they're you.
You are alone and trapped in your own mind, the world around you is your lie.
Soon you will be nothing, you will never again hear sounds, never again see colours, never again be anyone.


Riley Moon appreciates that Action Needs an Audience, but it's hard not to watch. Hair Status: Bubblegum Pink
Parallel with: The Heavy Weapons Guy

The Past
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