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Broken Like the Sun; this is private, scram
Topic Started: Feb 4 2011, 01:36 AM (2,942 Views)
Jonny
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You hate kings and you think kings are really stupid. They are petty, bossy tyrants and are really full of themselves and are basically awful in every way.
[ *  *  * ]
((Julian Avery continued from Not What I Was Expecting))

So what's the word on compromise?

Well oh man that's complicated isn't it I mean oh gee you can't exactly sum it up so easy like I am sure there are times when it is okay like times when you would need to do it so you can achieve some greater thing because let's face it not every

No.

But hey Julian you just compromised didn't you? You were gonna be the big scary bogeyman. It was your job to make sure that when the innocent people came up to you they got nice and scared away. Can't have them sticking around, right? No no no no.

That would be bad. That would be dangerous. You can't let them stick around Julian because of all the violence that happens around him, all the killers he'll be hunting, all the bodies piled up nice and neat, oh hey somebody could get hurt.

Hey Julian where are those bodies.

Where are all the killers you said you'd bring to justice.

What is it now, the sixth day? When did you kill Omar? Three days ago? Yes. Three days ago. And since then? Nothing. What? Nothing. So what, are you fucking up now? Whole lot of killers still on this island, whole lot of killing still being done. None by you. That's bad, right? Yours is the good kind. And it needs to happen. And if it doesn't, that means good people are dying. And so you need to get back to killing straight away.

And when you get back to killing, no more of this bullshit where you're nice to people and you let them talk to you and you let them leave without them being afraid for their fucking lives. No wait this is serious I am serious! This is probably sounding incredibly silly all of this but this is all what you need to do Julian. Pay attention now.

You need to find people. You need to kill people. You need to ignore what they tell you when they beg for their lives. You need to tell them their reasons were not good enough (your reason is good enough) and you need to shoot them. If they look particularly repentant you can kill them quickly, else you And then! And then, when you find people that you don't want to kill, you need to scare the shit out of them.

You need to do all of this or else you are failing your moral responsibilities.

Yeah so uh how's that for mental gymnastics.

Hmm. Interesting. Some folks on the horizon in this field of stacked logs (because that is where Julian was having this soliloquy, you see). So maybe Julian ought to stop being painfully self-aware for just a moment and look at who this is. He might need to kill them, after all. Or he might need to be scary and spooky and ooga booga booga.

Okay. One of them looks injured and the other is helping that one along, looks like. Let's take a look here, the uninjured one looks like

Looks like

Oh. Huh. How about that.
Jeremy Franco is alive. You can write a better ending, goddammit.

Charlie DuClare is dead. And nothing was easy anymore except to smile.
Julian Avery is dead. Courage was the man with a gun in his hand.
JJ Sturn is dead. Fuck it, all good things gotta come to an end.
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Jonny
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You hate kings and you think kings are really stupid. They are petty, bossy tyrants and are really full of themselves and are basically awful in every way.
[ *  *  * ]
So they can both walk away.

Oh thank you, that is a relief. Shoulders relax a bit, deep exhalation, bit of a grin forming on his face. Phew! Bit of a close call there, weren't it? This was exactly what Julian was hoping for because once the guns came out things got scary and things got dangerous and oh dear oh my oh goodness someone might get hurt if you're not careful with those things, please be careful with those things. Things got scary because nothing like this ever happened back at school, nothing like this ever happened before.

Because you pulled a fucking gun on Julian Avery and because nobody had ever thought of that before.

“Sorry man, not buyin' it. If you wanted someone to walk away, you wouldn't have pulled your piece on me.” Shook his head, but not enough to take his eyes off Raidon never enough to take his eyes off Raidon. “Nah, you wanna finish what you started.” And here he almost looked sympathetic. “It's okay, you can say it. I ain't gonna get mad.”

Which was the right thing to say, to a point. But probably a bad idea to rile the guy up too much, at least for now. Can't do that. If it was just the two of them, then fuck yeah, keep doing that. That was how it worked, right? You make him slip up. You get him angry, you get him shooting, and next thing you know he's sputtering up and you're victorious. That's how it worked, yes. You didn't get shot because you have a plan.

And the bullets fly straight from his gun all fast and cold as pissed off at the world, and you say wait. And they say yeah, what, and you say, I got a plan. And they put on their sad faces. Turn around, go live out their lives somewhere else. They can't do shit to you. Because you thought this out.

That wasn't how it was right now. None of Julian's plans had this girl in them. None of Julian's plans had measures to ensure she didn't get killed by a stray bullet or used as a human shield. None of Julian's plans ended with her, standing there, scared shell-shocked shivering but alive, still alive, still alive.

Which meant all of Julian's plans were shit.

“You wanna try and kill me again, that's fine by me. But we settle this just between the two of us. Aight?” Asian girl. About as big as he was. Looked like her leg got fucked up. Wonder who did that. “Nobody else needs to get shot. You think you can make that happen?”

Who was she?

She was, she was, Mizore Soryu. Sorta a hippie? No. Hippie was the wrong word. There were some very good words for what she was and what she liked to do, but they weren't coming right now. Maybe later. Maybe when nobody had a gun out. Maybe he'd even ask her- maybe she'd even tell him? Probably not. Hippies weren't the biggest fans of gunfire, even if it was for a very very good reason against a very very bad man.

That was okay, though, that was fine. Someone had to find out what a bogeyman Julian actually was. Someone had to spread the word. Someone had to shout it from the rooftops from the lighthouse from the mountain.

Someone had to make it so they'd just run away, they'd just turn and run, they'd just turn and turn away and he wouldn't have to see their faces.
Jeremy Franco is alive. You can write a better ending, goddammit.

Charlie DuClare is dead. And nothing was easy anymore except to smile.
Julian Avery is dead. Courage was the man with a gun in his hand.
JJ Sturn is dead. Fuck it, all good things gotta come to an end.
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Jonny
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You hate kings and you think kings are really stupid. They are petty, bossy tyrants and are really full of themselves and are basically awful in every way.
[ *  *  * ]
You can keep talking as long as you like, Raidon. Julian's not going to stop you. You can taunt and you can talk shit and you can try to rile Julian up and none of it will matter. None of it will matter because you have nothing to say and he has no reason to listen and you are a child you are a fucking child. And a child with a gun in his hand, so you'll have to forgive Julian if he focuses his attention on that over anything you have to say.

What, you're going to call him a coward? What, you're going to call him weak? You are out of luck, Raidon, because he's been doing that himself for a couple of days now and God knows he's more eloquent than you. Here is a suggestion: maybe you could, like, imply that your dad could beat up his dad? Or something. Maybe it would give you a tactical edge.

"I don't care what danger you think you're in. Or how right you think you are."

Okay on second thought you might want to actually shut up, Raidon. An adult is talking.

She wants you to put the guns away. She doesn't want anyone to get killed here. Cause for relief, cause for alarm. Yes, alarm. Julian let his guard down and not a second later he's bleeding out choking wondering where he went so wrong. Where? It was the moment he decided to trust her, of course. Because you can't trust her. Because look at who she's with. Because look at who she's not begging you to save her from. Can't be trusted.

So you know what to do. One two and they're both down and they're both dead and the good guys win again. Ride off into the sunset and know you made the right choice. Hear it on the announcements the next day, hear that Mizore and Raidon had gone and killed an orphanage right before you met. Her bum leg was from when one particularly scared-looking kid managed to fight back a bit. Go on. You know what to do.

No. You don't play that game. As long as you live and as long as you have choice, you never play that fucking game.

And so Julian Avery took his hands away from the gun and he put them up in the air. Because he was not the bogeyman he claimed to be and he never ever was.

And with a sad smile at the only adult in sight, “Okay, you win. Hey, uh. The gun's not coming back out, no matter what,” and here he probably looked at her hurt leg for a little too long, “so you don't have to worry about 'wrong answers' or any of that shit. But you mind explaining why? My man Raidon here ain't gonna quit till everyone's dead.”

“You... you are hunting down killers, yes?”

“Well.” He held up a finger. “Just the one so far. I was gonna try for a second, but then this girl with a gimp leg jumped out and... well, I won't bore you with the details.”

And a smile on her face too. See, things were getting friendly already. “So I assume you think killing is bad. Why do you think more killing will solve anything?”

Oh. You want Julian to explain. See, he didn't really think any of this through that far. He sort of figured that anyone he met would either be a big scary monster, or else he could make them run away real fast by making a spooky sound or two. But don't worry, Julian can improvise.

“There's what, maybe a hundred people left on this island who've all chosen not to kill. They just wanna live out the rest of their lives, say they goodbyes. But they havin' a hard time doin' that right now, cause they gotta look over their shoulder every five minutes for all the killers running around. Somebody puts the killers down, they can say their goodbyes a whole lot easier.” He shrugs. “Dunno about you, but I call that a solution.”

She looked down at herself, at her walking stick. “May I sit down? I'll only do so if you promise the guns won't come out again.” A pair of nods from a pair of gentlemen. And so she sat down. Shaking. “So you think you can, what--kill a few bad apples, that's the killers gone, and the rest of us will be a-okay, at least for a little while longer?”

"Naw. Not on my own. I mean, I thought I could make take all of them out single-handedly, but then Raidon said some pretty mean things and I just don't know anymore.” This was true, Julian had been devastated. “But... to a point, yeah. We been here almost a week now. I'd say most everyone's made the choice by now, how willing they are to kill. I mean, it's not gonna be a utopia. We all gonna die, pretty damn soon, but.... it don't have to be so quick. And it don't have to be so scary."

She looked down at her hands for a moment. "Noble." No, stop that. You are getting the wrong idea here. "But I think you're wrong." Okay, that was a little better, maybe. "What is the name of Omar's girlfriend?"

"Sierra."

“Sierra. I'm going to make some guesses about her state of mind now."

Okay. Go ahead.
Jeremy Franco is alive. You can write a better ending, goddammit.

Charlie DuClare is dead. And nothing was easy anymore except to smile.
Julian Avery is dead. Courage was the man with a gun in his hand.
JJ Sturn is dead. Fuck it, all good things gotta come to an end.
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Jonny
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You hate kings and you think kings are really stupid. They are petty, bossy tyrants and are really full of themselves and are basically awful in every way.
[ *  *  * ]
Seems like the question here is whether Julian's ideology, his mission, his twisted disturbing monster-in-shining-armor complex, can survive contact with someone who knows what they're talking about.

Let's not answer that yet, yeah?

Let's look at Julian right now, the boy with the entirely appropriately overwhelmed expression. Let's ask him what he's thinking. What are you thinking?

Thinking about t-shirts.

Thinking about the line that was supposed to be on his. Y'know Omar, in theory I give a shit. But in practice, you killed a man who hadn't done shit to you. And there's no way I'm lettin' you off this island. Yes this is a good slogan and you should wear this shirt if you want your friends to know that you're dangerous and badass but also sensitive and you got a good moral compass and shit.

This shirt, yeah? It really summed up Julian and it really gave you a glimpse into his psyche and really told you where he stood on all matters moral and martial except that it didn't, it didn't, it really didn't. It- it wasn't- that hadn't been why he'd killed Omar at all! Right? It wasn't about punishment, it was about protection, it was about making sure these guys who'd killed before and had no qualms about doing it again didn't have the chance to.

So why the fuck had he said that?

Let's not answer that yet, yeah?

Let's instead think about the other part there. It was about protection. Which meant killing all the people who were gonna kill in the future unless stopped. Okay, so who was that? Well, uh, uh, it was Omar for one, because, well, he'd told Julian that, uh, he'd keep killing till Sierra made it off the island.

And you believed him?

Well uh yeah of course you believe someone like that and also, uh, the other people who need to be killed are everyone who'd been on the announcements, because that's a pattern of behavior, that's indicative of what they'd do in the future, yes. And everyone who wasn't on, they were squeaky clean for now, so don't kill them until you hear their name, then it's okay to kill them, because you know they're bad. And you know they're bad because you were told they're bad, Danya told you they were bad.

And you believed him?

Well yes he believed Danya but no he definitely didn't did he? He'd already had that evidence plain as day about the kind of lies Danya told, lies like Julian Avery is: Out for Justice (in theaters this summer). So he didn't believe Danya, nope, he knew full well that you couldn't trust what the guy had to say, of course he knew that, everyone knew that, and yet he believed him.

Why?

Because-

Why?

So here was Julian with his entirely appropriately overwhelmed expression and not a fucking clue about what he was doing and single answer in sight. So, so, so do what everyone does when they don't have answers. Ask a question.

"What made you decide to save her, Raidon?"

And get an answer.

Well. Lot of things to think about there. Which was good, since Julian had a whole huge list of things he didn't want to think about right now. So instead of those he could listen to Raidon talking about how Scott didn't need to die- was that supposed to be an apology, or... ? Nah, unlikely- and about how he had a new project on his mind.

Killing Max Lombardi, huh. What do you think of that, Julian?

... Yeah, now's as good a time as any to answer.

“So. You wanna go hunting Max down, that's fine by me. You got my blessing.” And now the hard part! “But you think you're gonna do it alone, that's tough shit.” Much as I'd be alright with one of you killing the other, “I think I'mma come with you. Hold you to your word, and back you up too. Much as I trust you got skills with that gun,” he specializes in shooting fleeing unarmed kids in the back, you see, “having two of us on it's gonna make the whole thing a lot easier.”

“If we take him down, what happens next is up to you. You wanna take a shot at me, that's fine. You wanna part ways, I won't put one in your back. Shit, maybe we even get to be friends by then.” The best friends. Swapping stories around a campfire of all the murders they'd done.

“Which leaves...” you, Mizore. Julian's looking at you now. “Yeah. You ain't exactly in the best shape right now, so... first order of business for Team Murderers has to be getting you somewhere safe. Sawmill's pretty close, we could give it a shot first. You, ah, you okay with that?”

Yes her answer will be a positive one with no reservations about the faultless plan you have just devised.
Jeremy Franco is alive. You can write a better ending, goddammit.

Charlie DuClare is dead. And nothing was easy anymore except to smile.
Julian Avery is dead. Courage was the man with a gun in his hand.
JJ Sturn is dead. Fuck it, all good things gotta come to an end.
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Jonny
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You hate kings and you think kings are really stupid. They are petty, bossy tyrants and are really full of themselves and are basically awful in every way.
[ *  *  * ]
So you see the girl with the ribbons in her hair and the tears in her eyes and she's snarling, raging, breaking down, falling, scrambling away, and she's not well, not well at all, so you ask yourself, if you've even got a shred of human decency, you ask yourself who did that to her?

Because lord knows she wasn't always like this. Lord knows she was doing a whole lot better before- before what? Before the island before something before someone? And you look at yourself and you look at Raidon and you maybe shuffle around a little and point a finger this way, that way, cause nobody really likes taking the blame, but no bones about it you did that to her.

You did that to her.

And you want to make her better. You want to renounce everything about your killing and your mission and yourself and you want to look her in the eye and say I am new, I am new, I am someone else now and I am someone better. You want to throw down your sword and disassemble your gun and you want to fall to your knees and say you're sorry till you're someone else you're someone better.

And you want to look up, look over, maybe wipe your eyes off because something or other was in them, and you want to see Raidon doing the same as you. And you want for her to smile, you want for her to feel happy- or at least you want her to feel something else. Anything else. There's a whole goddamn range of emotions in this big beautiful world of ours, pick one, pick one, any one at all, and put it on so Julian can be glad.

It won't happen, no no, of course it won't happen because it'd take some sort of miracle- but just in case, please, in case anyone with a miracle up their sleeve is listening, if you could use it right here and make this fine, make everyone well, Julian would appreciate it. Anybody out there with a... with a miracle waiting to... waiting... no, not really, huh. Okay. Okay. That's fine, Julian can deal. That's okay.

What's the next best thing?

“Mizore, I...” The words fail, the man with all the words and all the charm and all the wit is standing here and choking on his thoughts and all that comes out is, “shit.”

No, don't give up that easy.

“Mizore. Can I get a word in private, real quick? Please?”

She nodded. No words for him, which was right and proper. And Raidon didn't seem to object to the idea, so... good.

“Hey, look, you're... you're right. You're completely right about everything. About everything.” Aww. You say that like you actually believe it. “I don't want to do this anymore, and I'd just walk away here, but...”

“Look, odds that we actually find Max are really, really low. Most likely, we just gonna be keeping Raidon outta trouble, which... it's good. I can get behind that.” Oh, you sly dog.

“And hey, maybe it'll end up that... he ain't done any more killing for a few days, and all of a sudden he realizes he ain't any more dead than when he was on his spree.”

“I... I know this is bullshit, this whole pretense, but it's the best I can do. And I wanna make it right. I wanna... make it right.”

And you look sad now, you look frightened, you look like someone else entirely, maybe. Like you actually believe any of it, maybe.

Wait, wait, wait. You do believe it.

Oh, then that's different.
Jeremy Franco is alive. You can write a better ending, goddammit.

Charlie DuClare is dead. And nothing was easy anymore except to smile.
Julian Avery is dead. Courage was the man with a gun in his hand.
JJ Sturn is dead. Fuck it, all good things gotta come to an end.
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Jonny
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You hate kings and you think kings are really stupid. They are petty, bossy tyrants and are really full of themselves and are basically awful in every way.
[ *  *  * ]
You are a killer. You walk into a clearing. There is a girl there. She says some things. A few minutes pass. You walk out of the clearing. You are no longer a killer.

How does something like that happen?

Probably best to just roll with it, right? This is good. This is a good thing you've got going here. This is walking around with your head held- well not high, but in a sorta middling position- because you're doing something to make the island safer and you didn't have to pull a single trigger. So don't doubt this, don't second-guess this. Don't pick at this scab because guess what, guess what, it's healing, it's getting better, and no reason in the world to see some ugly things right now. Don't second-guess this, don't

Oh god fucking dammit, Julian Avery. You're already second-guessing this, aren't you?

Back at the house where he'd first thought about t-shirts. There was a phrase that kicked around in his head. He'd treated it like an epiphany, because he was Julian Avery and he treated everything like an epiphany. Do you remember the phrase? Maybe it was I don't mind- no, no, not that one. That was a nice touch, a nice moment. Nice little way to give yourself a license to ignore any moral arguments leveled against you.

No, no, no, we're talking about I failed.

Yeeeeaaaah, that's the one. That's what all this is about. It's all about failing and failing and wanting to succeed, wanting to do something that leaves a positive mark on the island and so of course killing is what he ended up with, that must have been a great thought process. That's the root cause of all this bullshit, that's-

Oh snap! Looks like all of a sudden it's amateur self-psychoanalysis hour! Gather round, boys and girls, this is some Sigmund Freud level shit! This is a teenage murder getting all self-deprecating and self-referential, which is what you've all been waiting for!

It was just gonna go on like this. Thinking about it was gonna lead to hating himself for it was gonna lead to thinking about why he was hating himself was gonna lead to hating himself for thinking about it was gonna lead nowhere soon. Snake eats its tail and we call it meaningful introspection.

Well, fuck that. When the little part of his head, the shitty little self-deprecating part, came knocking, Julian knew what to do. When it taunted him, told him the new leaf he'd turned over stemmed from the very same fucked-up instinct that'd driven him to kill, he knew what to say.

I don't mind.

And here was Raidon asking him to, if it came down to it, keep Mizore safe from whoever they got into a fight with. Yeah, Julian could do that. He could live with that. He could keep someone out of harm's way just fine. And he could maybe even have a smile on his face when he did it.

Still no word on compromise. But I hear change is pretty good.

(Julian Avery continued elsewhere)
Jeremy Franco is alive. You can write a better ending, goddammit.

Charlie DuClare is dead. And nothing was easy anymore except to smile.
Julian Avery is dead. Courage was the man with a gun in his hand.
JJ Sturn is dead. Fuck it, all good things gotta come to an end.
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