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Milk of Human Kindness; Open
Topic Started: Sep 21 2010, 03:49 PM (3,827 Views)
Stark
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Nuts.
[ *  *  * ]
((Albert Lions continued from Dude, how come I feel like I'm not in Kansas anymore?))

"DOOOOUUUUUGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAL!"

Albert scratched his head. Was he even going the right way? Had Dougal gone off in another direction entirely? Did they have cable out here? So many questions flooded Albert's mind all at once. "C'mon, dude, you around here? Say somethin', man!" Had he been looking at the ground, of course, he probably would have noticed the obstruction that lay in his path, and of course, not subsequently tripped over it and fallen on his face. "What th- whoaoaoa!"

FWUMP.

The boy pushed himself to his knees, spitting out sand as he brushed his clothes off. "Freakin' ow, man, what the heck was- Oh. Oh crap." A quick glance back revealed exactly what he had tripped over. Some fat kid, a bullethole between his eyes. He kind of recognized the guy, too. That couldn't be a good sign. "Dude, that can't be a good sign." His eyes darted around wildly for his friend. "Heeeey, Dougal? I got a bad feeling about this place, so if you're out there, say somethin'... Kinda don't wanna stick around too long. This is really kinda creepy, man." He looked out toward the water, briefly wondering if it was actually the ocean, or just a lake or something - maybe even a firth? - when he noticed that distinct blonde hair he'd recognize a mile away. "Dougal!" he shouted, running towards his friend, who for whatever reason was just lying there. He gave the other boy a nudge. "Dude, what're you doin' sleeping out here? Let's get going, someone got shot out here! Grab the shotgun and... wait where's the shotgun? No, wait, we'll worry about that later, c'mon, we gotta get moving, wake up!"

No response.

"Uh, Dougal? You're freakin' me out, man." Still quiet. Albert's mouth curled into a nervous, twitching smirk. Something wasn't right here. He nudged him again. "H-hey... say somethin'..." Still nothing. Al grabbed the boy's body by the shoulders and shook him as hard as he could. "Dude! Seriously, snap out of it! This isn't funny! And trust me, I know funny!" Dougal just limply went along with the shaking, head bouncing lifelessly about like a ragdoll. His skin was cold. It wasn't supposed to be cold. "DUDE! CUT IT OUT NOW! WAKE! THE HELL! UP!"

Albert dropped the corpse of Augustus MacDougal back to the ground. A single tear dripped onto the dead boy's shirt. Then another. This wasn't right. Al had never seen a dead body before. He knew nothing of death. Yet here he was, kneeling over the corpse of his best friend. His best friend, who'd been alive just hours ago.

It wasn't right.

He couldn't be dead.

"Sorry, Al. It's true."

...Wait a minute. Who else was here? Albert looked up, to see the source of the voice. His jaw dropped.

"...Dougal?"
<Mimi>: You are much nicer than I thought you'd be!
<Stark>: Shut up, fatty.
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Stark
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Nuts.
[ *  *  * ]
Al looked down to the body that lay at his knees, then back to Dougal.

Back to the body.

Now back to Dougal.

"He's gonna start thinking you're crazy if you keep doing that, Al," Dougal said, motioning to the skinny black kid to his left.

Albert simply stared back quizzically. Funny, he hadn't noticed the skinny black kid there a minute ago. Granted, he was more focused on his friend being in two places at once, but that was neither here nor th- wait, no, it totally was. "Why would he-"

"Because I'm a ghost, Al. He can't see me. Just you." Well, that resolved that particular issue. Although, why couldn't the other kid see him? He was right there, after all. "Why can't h-"

"Because that's how ghosts work, okay Al?" he interrupted, rubbing his forehead frustratedly. "Just roll with it." Right, okay, be subtle. Al could do subtle. He nodded his head in acknowledgement.

...Okay, so he could totally not do subtle. Still, he could try. So, he rose to his feet, turning to face Buddy Whassisname. "Ummmm... hi? Hi. So, uhhh, not everyday you find a dead guy on the beach, right?" "Oh, for fuck's sake." He wasn't sure what Dougal's problem was. Clearly, he was off to a fine start. "Anyway, uh, I was just thinking maybe it'd be a good idea to bury him, y'know? Respect for the dead and all. I mean, if that's cool with you." That last part he said with his head still pointed at Buddy, but his eyes aimed at Dougal. "...Wait, you're asking me? I mean, go ahead, if that's you're thing, it's not as if it really affects me at this point." Al paused a moment, wondering why Dougal contracted "you are" just then, but held back the question. After all, he didn't want to look crazy or anything.
<Mimi>: You are much nicer than I thought you'd be!
<Stark>: Shut up, fatty.
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Stark
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Nuts.
[ *  *  * ]
A very good idea. Huh. Not something Al got very often. He smiled back at the other guy, already busy at the hole. "Thanks, man. Hey, don't start without me, yeah?" With that, the little blond dove right in, vigorously tearing through the sand. This would be just like the time they buried Dougal up to his neck when he fell asleep at the beach when they were ki- wait, had that been Dougal? Al paused to think a moment.

...Nope, that was Megan, back before she moved to Michigan. Man, how could he get those two mixed up? She was, like, the anti-Dougal or something. He wondered briefly how she was doing these days, before his mind wandered to other things. Things like how hungry he was right now. Things like pizza. Big ol' pan pizza from Pizza Hut, with extra cheese, and ground beef, and bacon bits, and "Hey, ethereal plane to Al. You diggin' that hole or not?" Oh, right, duh. The grave. He'd kept at it unconsciously, but his digging had slowed to a crawl as his thoughts drifted and his mouth watered at the thought of delicious, savory pseudo-Italian pie. Mmmmm. Dougal snapped his fingers. Crap, now he'd done it again. Focus, Al! Obeying his own instructions, he got back to the task at hand, digging like a mole being chased. His digging was inefficient, but in much the way using TNT is an inefficient way of fishing: it's a gross abuse of resources for a task that can be accomplished with a string and a hook, but it works.

After another minute or so, maybe an hour, however long it took them to get a foot and a half, Al couldn't really tell, a new voice sounded out. Al knew that voice, at least. In his best Sly Stallone impersonation, he called out, "Yo, Adrian!" causing Dougal to facepalm yet again. Speaking normally again, he answered, "We're just diggin' Dougal here a grave. You wanna help?" His reply was oddly cheerful for the situation, but to be fair, it was the only way he knew how to cope.
<Mimi>: You are much nicer than I thought you'd be!
<Stark>: Shut up, fatty.
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Stark
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Nuts.
[ *  *  * ]
((Skipping for activity and death type purposes, sorry for the shortpost.))


Seemed they were drawing a crowd. "Yeah, no worries, they were dead when we got here. Right, Dougal?" The ghost's facepalming was beginning to become a pattern. "Al. They can't hear me." "...Oh, right." He looked back at the group, before relaying the message. "Yeah, Dougal says it's cool."

His stomach growling, Al decided he couldn't wait any longer. "I'm gonna go see if I can find us some food, alright? I'll be right back." He climbed out of the pit, then motioned for his friend to follow. "C'mon, Dougal, let's go!"

Exasperated, Dougal let out a loud sigh. "Why me?"


((Albert Lions continued in Where There Is Fire, We Will Carry Gasoline))
<Mimi>: You are much nicer than I thought you'd be!
<Stark>: Shut up, fatty.
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