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Yossarian's Wacky RPG!; WARNING: Not for normal people!
Topic Started: Jan 11 2009, 05:22 AM (1,166 Views)
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[ *  *  * ]
Wild SCORPION appeared!

Commiechu had prepared his entire life for this moment. ...Not really. But still. Commiechu got excited pretty much any time he had the opportunity to kill something. Especially something American. Commiechu's loathing of America was matched only by his love of... not... America. In fact, he wasn't entirely sure how he had gotten to America in the first place. Time travel may or may not have been involved. Probably vodka, too. But anyway. Back to the scorpion.

As the insect reared back, preparing to strike, Commiechu ran up to it, kicked it in the face, used Thunderbolt, plucked off all of its legs, used Hyper Beam, took a turn to recover, used Hyper Beam again and defecated on it all in one swift motion.

Wild SCORPION fainted!

Suddenly, Commiechu realized that his victory theme wasn't playing. Goddammit. Was he going to have to murder every single member of his orchestra AGAIN? It was so difficult to find the replacements for them. But no. It appeared that someone had murdered his orchestra FOR HIM. A giant, tricked-out car (Man, what a bass! And are those spinning rims? Wow, those Americans had some good taste in vehicles.)was speeding away, a man leaning out the window carrying a gun and shouting obscenities.

COMMIECHU used GROWL!

The attack was ineffective...

Damn. That one usually works so well, too.

No matter. Clearly, the only solution would be to hunt down those responsible, whoever they may be. And anyone that gets in the way must be struck down as well.

COMMIECHU used HYPER BEAM!

That tourist would totally have tried to stop him if he hadn't killed her first.

With that, Commiechu ran off into the desert at 2:15 at a steady rate of 35 mph, taking regular breaks every 2 hours, while a train departed the same station at the same time in the opposite direction traveling at a constant rate of 20 mph. At what time are they exactly 293 miles apart from each other?

Commiechu didn't care. All that mattered was revenge.
"Standing there in the middle between life and death gave me a delirious, almost evil sense of joy." --Max Beckmann
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[ *  * ]
This was, by far, the worst day of Sakura's 2,481-year (so far, of course) life. She was so hungry for blood, and here was the sun, dimming her senses in a defiant attempt to make her completely miserable. She squinted and trudged on in search of the heavily advertised "rap battle." Sure, it wasn't quite a ball in a mansion filled with vampires and jrock artists, but she was sure to find some blood, or at least some asian people (so kawaii!) to look at there. It was rather hot outside, but she did not regret wearing her knee high black leather combat boots with red ribbon laces, lacy black miniskirt, and red corset. If she wore these things, maybe people would notice and shower her with blood and attention.

And notice her they did- somewhere behind her and to her right, someone called.
'YO Bitch! Wanna take a ride?'

She spun around, astonished that someone would try to talk to her when she was clearly busy feeling sorry for herself. Examining him carefully from afar, she became extremely disappointed. Not only was he not Asian, but he wasn't even good looking. And yet he dared ask something of her, the graceful Sakura Naruto Sasuke Bleach Yaoi Cullen Johnson of the Cullen Vampire Clan (which she inherited after she broke Edward Cullen's heart, causing both him and Bella to kill themselves). Without a second look in the man's direction, she continued on her way.
hi i am a little bee

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