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Viewing Single Post From: Roots of Jade
General Goose
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Don't cast aspersions on my asparagus.
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Clarice was wrong about her perception of Bradley's sense of humour, and if she would have voiced her opinion out loud or Bradley otherwise would have gotten wind of it, he'd have been more than happy to put her straight. The height of humour for Bradley was not a dead baby with a Nazi uniform.

The height of humour was a baby in a Nazi uniform standing over a pile of other dead babies.

Or maybe the dead babies would be the Nazis and their vanquisher would have no such affiliations.

Bradley liked tales to have happy endings, even the darkly comedic ones!

Sadly Clarice did not voice this opinion, so such clarification would be lost on the world at large. The opportunity to articulate, or even construct, such a witty response would forever be squandered, an unknown waste of potential. It was almost tragic, Bradley occasionally pondered, how many of the world's finest jokes would be lost to history or rendered irrelevant by changing circumstances, and he would never realise that that very moment was one of those even more tragic moments, of a comedic opportunity slipping by unnoticed and unmourned.

However, Clarice would soon more than make up for such lost opportunities by providing near infinite ammunition. That was what Bradley liked - no, loved - about Clarice. A very good sparring partner. A great muse for the finest in risque and edgy humour. And such a wonderfully unappreciative audience.

"You got it!" he cheerily replied to her demand to fuck off, deciding not to mine this particular resource too quickly. If he aggravated her too quickly, after all, it might provoke a negative reaction from the management. He didn't want that. The lens of punitive alley management scrutiny, the guilt of getting an innocent person ejected from their bowling alley venture, and the loss of such a humorous target for trolling was an unattractive combination.

He just replied to that 'fuck off' demand with a cheery "not like I was here first or something!"

He held his tongue.

The 'you of all people should be able to sympathise with the position of someone who's been here for ages dealing with unwelcome invaders demanding changes in behaviour' line was too great a weapon to drop this early.

Now that he thought about it, it might anger Kimiko as well!

Maybe.

He didn't really understand Taiwan.

So he returned to his game.

He enjoyed bowling, after all.

But he kept one eye on the more interesting game.

And then Clarice got a split. He couldn't resist providing commentary. "Oh, a split!" he said with a chippy and upbeat cheesiness to his tone. "You know, they call that particular split arrangement of pins bed posts! Or goal posts, but that name strikes me as rather misleading as it applies you want to aim in the middle of them," he mused, deciding to throw in some random trivia.

"So I prefer calling them bedposts. You wanna be a notch on my bedpost, Clarice?”

If either of the girls turned around to face Bradley, they would have been greeted with a wink.
V6 peeps:
Kiziah Saraki
Bradley Floyd
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Roots of Jade · Strikeout Bowling Alley