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Internet de geso~
[ *  * ]
((Joe Rios continued from All That I've Ever Known))

Joe had been wandering around for quite a while. A little under a day, by his measure, since they had left the sawmill at night on the second day. He was already uncomfortable with this arrangement; he was wandering around, technically armed but unable to quickly access his weapon, with his only traveling companion being someone who was not the most mentally stable person on planet Earth, to say the least.

The announcement had clicked on shortly after they left. He had missed the first one due to an incident with a bit of dynamite that some idiot had thrown into the sawmill for no apparent reason, so he decided to pay some attention to this one and see if he recognized any names.

"Honestly kids I don't know how to make this any more simple for you. A certain Rose Codreanu, managed, somehow, to fail to realise that she too was in a dangerzone. We're doing future generations a favour with ones like that, we really are."

Rose. Unfortunately, he most certainly did. All the air left Joe Rios' lungs, and for the next few seconds any rational thought in his mind was replaced by rage and bloodlust towards Danya. He managed to cool himself down a bit to hear the next bit of bad news.

"Well, after that, everyone's favourite midget, Reiko Ishida managed to score with another double kill. That's right kids, that puts her on four. First up was Tobias Elwin, who took a knife to the throat and then right afterwards, Raina Morales discovered that Reiko's boot was a lot harder than her head. Must've been a real kicker for her..."

Wait, what the fuck. Joe did a double-take. Reiko!? What the fuck? The rage was overtaken by confusion as Joe wondered what in the hell kind of bizarro world he had entered into where Reiko Motherfucking Ishida, of all people, could be a psycho killer. Judging by Danya's praise of her, Joe briefly considered sending Cisco off to her instead; she was certainly a far better Grim Reaper than he was, he mused.

He didn't pay much attention to the rest, brooding over the loss of his best friend and the apparent total transformation of another old friend, until one of the last lines.

"Alright kiddies, all the current dangerzones are cleared. But, it wouldn't be any fun if we had none, so I'm going to go ahead and name The Infirmary, The Key and The Mansion as our latest dangerzones. Don't pull a Codreanu, folks - haul ass!"

Okay, seriously, fuck you, Danya. This hurts enough without you nicknaming a stupid mistake after her, you fucking asshole, Joe thought to himself, somewhere between defeated and annoyed.

They kept walking. Every now and then, Cisco would re-apply first aid materials and feed himself; he was surprisingly self-sufficient for someone with his head so far in the clouds. He eventually started mumbling something about reaping souls and proving himself; Joe hoped the Grim Reaper thing wasn't actually starting to get to Cisco's head, as the last thing he needed was for his buddy to turn into an absolute psychopath.

After a while, they arrived at some woods and Cisco asked him a really, really stupid question.

"Joe? Buddy?" Cisco whimpered to Joe. "Is everything all right?"

"Of course everything isn't fucking all right! My best friend died horribly and got ruthlessly mocked over the announcements, and another person I was reasonably close to has been going on a batshit insane killing spree, you fucking idiot!" Joe snapped back.

An awkward pause.

"Sorry... I didn't mean to get angry at you. It's not your fault, you couldn't possibly have known that I was close to Rose or Reiko," Joe apologized. "Still, saying this is an unwelcome development would be just a bit of an understatement," he added. "Seriously, what the fuck, it's like the universe is out to get me or something." Joe was speaking in an oddly down-to-earth manner for someone who was supposedly the Grim Reaper. He briefly considered totally dropping the lie and admitting to Cisco that it was just a convenient story to get an ally, but he figured Cisco didn't need the extra trauma right now.
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Quoth Super Llama:
One day, the fabled Ragnarok will come, and as the gods descend to earth and wage war while the world dies around them, WickedIcon will lead the charge, a 12-gauge shotgun in his right hand, and a bottle of Jack Daniels in his left as he rides a steed made of fire and pain.

And the masses will look upon him and weep at the beauty of it all.

[19:25] Hallucinogenic: it's not like i wanna put my anus on parade

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Too Late · The Woods: Inland