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Blastinus
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That's Just Crazy Talk
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Glenn Hughes is a pleasant surprise when it comes to V1 characters. Just based on his introductory thread, you could make the case that this was a character waking up in V3 or V4. He's scared, but compassionate, helping out Chi Masumi and sharing some conversation about the island and what's been going on. Glenn and his older brother are from Southampton in the UK, which riserugu demonstrates primarily through throwing in "bloody" every now and then. Naturally, what with him and his older brother Fred being stuck on the same island, priority one is for the two bros to unite, and that's when something odd happens: he whips out his phone and calls him. At first, I wasn't sure what was happening. I've been so used to characters either having their phones confiscated or getting no signal, it seemed weird that they would actually work.

But anyway, we get our swift reminder that we are in V1 when a couple of peculiar characters show up: one holding a teddy bear and drawing people out using crocodile tears, the other commenting to herself about "vile fools". Naturally, Glenn and Chi aren't having any of that nonsense, so they vamoose while their sanity's intact and wait on a hillside for Fred, running into Marie Zaid in the process. Marie's gimmick is that she's got headphones on, so her posts are full of random song lyrics interspersed with the occasional dialogue. The group interacts a bit, and we get this interesting bit of philosophy from Glenn:
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"The one permanent emotion of people is fear - fear of the unknown, the complex, the inexplicable. What everyone wants above everything else is safety. So yes, I feel fear for myself -- What's going to happen, when is my time going to be up. I also fear for my brother..."

Which, you know, is kinda flat, but by V1 standards, he might as well be scrawling these thoughts on gold-leaf papyrus.

Of course, if Glenn seems normal in comparison to Marie, that's nothing compared to the strange caricature booming his direction next. Eddie Serjeanston, Sarge for short, talks and acts like he's a grizzled 40-year old. New ally in tow, Glenn continues his Bro Quest at the Gazebo, where he meets a guy by the name of Jacob Starr, who flips a handgun into a holster and doesn't kill anyone doing it, thereby proving that V5 kids are just dumb. Then he meets Sven Kekule, who's escaped from Alcatraz, or so he says. All this weirdness proves too much for Glenn, and he exits stage left.

Hope's on the horizon though, as Glenn discovers a brief Adam Dodd cameo who tells him that his brother's looking for him. And wouldn't you know it, but there he is! Having accomplished his Bro Quest and attracted a sizable entourage, the obvious question now becomes what Glenn will do with his remaining game. Why, interact with more weird people. That's what! Our next nut of note is Daphne, who delivers a completely appropriate story about killing a girl with a rock.
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"Playing this game?" she asked casually, looking back towards her stick-like legs, decorated with scars, poking out of her shorts. "Haven't decided yet...But I don't mind killing. It's kind of...normal to me, after all."

And just to prove her point, she randomly kills Marie right in front of everyone else, and they react by...giving her a warning and then walking away. Alright. Sure. Although Glenn is so shaken by Marie's death that he basically becomes a paperweight stuck in the corner of a massive 17-page thread while everyone else tries to sort things out. Under the circumstances, it's easy to see why he preferred to stay out of that tangled mess. The other problem though is that his brother Fred is being controlled by the same handler, so Fred's taking the lead for now while Glenn just trails behind. It's to the point where in the next thread, everyone acknowledges Fred's existence but they have to be constantly reminded that Glenn is there too.

The disadvantages of these large threads are no more evident than when Daphne becomes the murderbush, just standing off to the side and stabbing whoever comes within her general vicinity. Everyone's so preoccupied with the other goings-on that it almost seems like they're bored with the spectacle. "Oh look, Daphne's gone on a stabbing spree again. What a bother." Everyone except Glenn that is. After a long period of not doing much of anything, suddenly he and Daphne have a big fight, and it's actually kind of fun. They bounce philosophy off one another and engage in a duel with a 2x4 versus a knife. Of everything that I've read about Glenn, this is easiest his best moment by far...

Which is only diminished a little by the fact that a totally unrelated guy decides to spray the group with an uzi. Lame, dude. The uzi man, who I'm not even going to dignify with a name, just fires bullets and bullets, and the scene goes on for far too long. Long enough for the place to suddenly become a danger zone mid-fight. I will say that V1 handlers seemed a lot less concerned about avoiding injuries at all times, since this firefight has a lot of people get clipped and nicked. Not the sort of injuries that would be debilitating, but still more realistic than everything missing. I appreciate that, and wish that handlers in the more modern versions would allow injuries like these.

Next thread, uzi man is gone, so they have time to regroup. There's this one girl called Mallory whose handler seems to be trying way too hard to pair her up with Glenn, and the handler says as much in OOC chat, but it seems like Glenn is just being friendly like usual, so it's really one-sided and a bit obnoxious. Then another big fight breaks out and there's confusion and people not posting in a while so the whole thing is muddled and really not a fantastic read. Long story short, the group flees yet again to Glenn's final thread, where he and Mallory get ambushed by a Bond villain named Peri Barclay who's like: "Choose who will die, hiss hiss!" I'm only partially paraphrasing there. The handler keeps mentioning how he snarls and hisses when he talks. It's a weird mental picture.

And boy, wouldn't you know it, but the oh so unique twist is that he's going to shoot the opposite one instead of the one who's chosen, so Glenn ends up taking the bullet. This death makes me legit mad, because of all the crazies and weirdos and lame gimmicks, Glenn struck me as a character written in earnest to be as realistic as possible. Having him be another victim of this clownshow that's V1 just really burns me. He deserved better.

Could I do another one?
Edited by Blastinus, Oct 4 2017, 03:17 AM.
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