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Kermit
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i'm the worst
[ *  *  *  * ]
PROFILE: So, the first bit of information we get about Chiaki is that she dropped out of school but went back for some reason. I’m not sure if that’s a thing that actually happens, but it’s ok because V2. She likes playing guitar, war history, shooting stuff, and martial arts. I’m sure the latter two definitely weren’t an attempt to give her more skillz. There’s nothing really to say about her physical description. There’s nothing outlandish, and it’s pretty decent by V2 standards. Chiaki has a Japanese mom, and an American father, who “who used to serve as a major figure in the US Army”. What exactly he was isn’t elaborated upon, so I’ll be forced to assume he was George Washington, who was an influential figure in the American military.. Because her dad was George Washington, he told her war stories from a young age, (which I do not recommend irl, traumatizing children is bad), and also taught her how to play the guitar for some reason. Chiaki decided she wanted to join the military when she grew up, obviously having been indoctrinated by George Washington (also now she likes guns PEW PEW BANG BANG POW!). When she was 13, she started skipping class (bad sign), and for some reason, George Washington didn’t care, as he was happy that Chiaki knew how to play guitar and wanted to join the military. I’m beginning to doubt George Washington’s parental skills. Chiaki dropped out of school at 15; again, not a thing that actually happens. George Washington was like “go back 2 skool (even though I’m contradicting my earlier statements)” and Chiaki’s like “ugh fine”, and now she’s back at school. This whole dropping-out thing seems unnecessary. Oh well. Now Chiaki’s real good at learning, but is bad at group work because “as her pride over her own abilities led her to the conclusion that she doesn't need groupwork or teamwork.”. Her narcissism was literally not mentioned until now, and this is the second-last paragraph of her profile. Huh.Chiaki’s recently been approached with a record deal for her...guitar playing, I guess? And then that’s the end of her profile. I’m pretty sure my analysis of her profile is longer than the profile itself. Well, what can you do?




Island time!
Chiaki doesn’t know what to do, because George Washington was always there to guide her (??????????) and she has no ability to think for herself. Oh, apparently the gun she got was one of the guns she’d been trained to use. Oh dear. Also, she knows the exact weight of the gun BY FUCKING MEMORY! I am now forced to assume that Chiaki is a robot with internet access. So, she got woken up by an announcement (the 1st, I think. It’s not stated.), and she “seemed” to laugh. I dunno if she actually laughed, maybe she was crying, there’s a lot of things that “seem” like laughing.

So, apparently she was actually laughing. Her reasoning behind this is, and I quote: “She had a chance to put all of her dad's war stories into her own reality, and fell such a huge of adrenaline at the thought of pointing that gun of hers at someone, pulling the trigger, and ending their pathetic existance. Anyone who dies here was obviously too weak to continue on. “So, she’s a bog-standard v1/2 style villain who’s entire thought process is just “wow murder is fun!”.

I died a bit inside when I read this next part. Ahem, also a direct quote: “She thought it would be an added bonus if she could get some begging and pleading from her victims. It would sound like a wonderful chorus to a song... but she ditched that anology when she realized how emo fagtastic it sounded.”

Swiftly moving on, Derrin Istoli (have been previously tortured by Adam Dodd’s cousin) stumbles across the road, and is all like “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUHHHHHGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH PAIN IT HURTS YOWCH HLEP PLS!”. Chiaki responds by being all like “Oh jee whiz, are you okay?”, continuing in the V2 tradition of female players who pretend to be nice, but are actually EVIIIIIILLLLLL (seriously there are a lot of them in V2). Chiaki shoots at Derrin, and Chiaki’s writer proceeds to GM Derrin into getting shot in the gut. Also Chiaki calls her gun “her lover”. Oh V2, I love you so very much (not sarcasm).

Derrin proceeds to die. Now, there’s some stuff about Derrin that I won’t touch upon right now, but his schizophrenia (the voice in his head’s name is JEFF!) is cured by getting shot in the stomach. Chiaki is like “wow that was fun” and then leaves. One thread down, three to go.

Mariavel’s in the next thread, but so is Tori, who is generally a pretty good character. Here’s hoping they balance each other out. Chiaki’s happy that God gave people the ability to kill each other. Okay then. I think she’s got a sexual thing about killing, because that’s honestly the only explanation I’ve got. If she hadn’t been kidnapped for SOTF, she’d grow up to be a serial killer. Thanks for killing all the future serial killers, terrorists.

Chiaki wants to have sex with her weapons. I’m beginning to think she might have a few underlying mental issues that have gone untreated. If you are having thoughts similar to Chiaki’s, you should immediately go to the doctor. Take your meds, kids.

Chiaki notices Mariavel and Tori doing stuff (Tori’s reading stuff, and Mariavel’s having another flashback). Chiaki’s like “YES I WILL KILL THEM, MURDER IS VERY FUN! I AM EVIL!”, but then…

A voice…

“It’s very rude to eavesdrop.”

AND THEN ANOTHER ONE OF CHIAKI’S HANDLER’S CHARACTERS PUNCHES HER IN THE FACE AND THEN LEAVES!

whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Oh well.

Tori notices Chiaki out in the hallway and then some Chiaki says some weird stuff and then there’s a whole bunch of OOC posts about GMing. Everything that Chiaki’s saying right now is some kind of innuendo or talking about murder/pain in a sexual way. I’m uncomfortable. Hilarity involving Mariavel being EEEEEEVILLLL and also Chiaki being EEEEEEEEEEEVILLLLL and Tori being a normal fucking person and also some GMing ensues. BUT SUDDENLY, ONE OF MARIAVEL’S FRIENDS POPS OUT AND DIES! And then Mariavel’s like “:(“ AND THEN SHE’S LIKE “GET AWAY FROM ME MY FRIEND DIED!”, even though nobody’s had a chance to fucking react yet jesus christ aaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh. And then Mariavel leaves.Only Tori has had a chance to post, but whatever. Chiaki also leaves. Well, that was a thread. (aw fuck she left just before Bryan Calvert arrives in the thread)

Chiaki stumbles upon the OG Kenurton Larris (who is inactive-dying this thread), and Chiaki’s all like “murder is my fetish” and Kenurton’s like “DUDE WHERE’S MY WEED BRO?” and then Chiaki shoots Kenurton in his his wiggly-woogly boy parts. Chiaki runs away and Kenurton get DZed. NEXT THREAD!

Well, looks like Chiaki’s gone inactive now. Heck. Anyways, she gets in a tizzy with Franco Sebberts, there's some taser-inside-mouth action, and then Franco shoots her in the gut. Too bad getting shot in the stomach didn’t cure her crazy like it did for Derrin. Oh well.

Conclusion: I feel like Chiaki embodies many of V2’s pitfalls; she’s a premade player, turned on by violence, pretended to be a nice person when she was a meanie, killed an inactive, and then got inactive killed. Her first thread was fun to read, but I just kinda felt uncomfortable with the rest. She’s definitely not the best V2’s got to offer, but she’s not the worst.


Gimme another pls
Ravioli Marill - Today at 9:49 AM
(Mariavel is Kermit)


Some people that might be in V7 (or not):

Michael Froese: "Is it bad that I hope today's the day Richard finally fucking snaps, brings a gun to school, and shoots me in the head? Because I really can't deal with this shit anymore."

Valerija Bogdanovic: "If we as a society continue using words like "cuck" or "Reagan fetishist" to describe those who's political views differ from our own, we will accomplish nothing. Alienating each other will just lead to further division. If I were to insult you straight to your face, it's not like you'd hold my opinion with any merit."

Maxwell Fenster: "Okay then."


V1 sprites!

mini stuff!?!??!?!?!?!?!?


Wow look here's a big ol' spotify playlist, listen to it (only if u want im not ur boss)!
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The V2 Read-o-thon · Roleplaying Discussion