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Cicada Days
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i can feel something inside me say
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⠀⠀⠀Latanna Beckstead to Hannah Celeste Goodliffe⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀Sun, May 10, 2015, at 6:03 PM



Dearest Hannah,

It is indeed rather unfortunate, you were very much missed! Johannes, of course, takes precedence... I am very glad you took the responsibility onto yourself. In trying times like these we rise to the occasion, as is called of us by higher powers.

And... yes, I do see. Hannah, please do not feel the inclination to look down upon yourself for taking, what I strongly believe, is satisfaction in being a proper older sister. In doing your filial, your civic duties. Though I do not wish to for a moment imply my own arrogance on the matter, I firmly believe what you experienced is indeed the hallmark of adulthood. I have experienced similar myself, in taking on the crisis-es of the community during explosive drug busts, unfortunately timed pop quizzes, so on. Time seems to pass faster than it ought then. I see you've noticed that as well!

I was indeed going to ask that, you preempt me deftly, as always. And oh. Oh dear, poor Johannes. I too noticed when he'd speak over Skype, that his demeanor seems slightly changed. I pray for the both of you, of course. I pray that your lives remain stable, bountiful. I pray his strength stay and that he grow to love this world for it's beauty, rather than hate it for it's potential ugliness. Potential. Mind you. We must continue to stay the course, not jump to rash conclusions. As you said.

But of course I do not want to merely dismiss your concerns. Indeed school has been cancelled, perhaps necessarily, and counseling has been made available for my classmates, and I imagine it will stay in place until this is all resolved and we find our friends and their loved ones safe and sound. Mothers counselor for her anxiety, Dr. Woolsey, was walking around on campus. I noticed him as I passed by.

My opinion is that Kingman's School Board is doing what must be done, though I would strongly argue that completely ending school was thoroughly unnecessary. I strongly believe maintaining morale can go hand in hand with maintaining grades. I would not be one to pass judgement onto my peers, however. Whatever they must do to cope while they await the return of their friends, I wholeheartedly condone, and I am glad you too see the wisdom in the current state of affairs. I believe Father may indeed recommend I attend the counseling sessions. I will do my best to be a good patient, and help them help myself whatever my needs may be.

Please, Hannah. Do not be down on yourself, I beseech you. Your spirit and energy inspire me, as youths during summers in Provo and now, in such a world that we have all been forced to live in. I thank God everyday that you are my cousin, that we share such an immutable bond as blood itself. Surely my world would be a duller, more miserable place without you. Chin up, please! You are not pressuring me, and I hope your fears and insecurities do not blind you or mislead you. As you yourself said, we must all come together. As a family, and as ourselves. Do not turn on yourself in this critical moment, Hannah. You are God's creation and vessel for your own soul, and you must thusly love yourself as you love God.

We shall meet in the next call, tomorrow morning. If I may wax poetic? I believe one day soon we shall look back on these days with the grace of hindsight and wonder how we could ever have worried and threatened to tear ourselves apart.

Love and blessings. I love you,
Latanna
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