"We tried to be better, but we aren't. I don't think anyone could last more than a week here if they weren't willing to do bad things." - Alba Reyes

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Namira
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Null sheen.
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Yes she was speaking for the both of them. Shut up, Jerry.

She didn't bother saying that aloud, specifically because it was Jerry. It would be like trying to tell a brick wall to stop being a brick wall. Maybe momentarily satisfying, but then it would go right back to being a brick wall again. Jerry had the added disadvantage that he could be a wall whilst being smug. And talking.

...

Toby was starting to go crazy with these analogies.

She didn't make an effort to conceal her impatience at the conversation. Toby's efforts on suppression were focused on one area only; the fact that she didn't have a plan. She'd been trying to keep that stuffed underneath the surface for the past couple of days now, and whilst she'd managed to keep from saying it, she hadn't stopped thinking it. Finding Trav didn't count as a plan. That was step one of a plan. Plans, even the most basic, had more than one step.

And that was what terrified her. That was what made her want to double over and puke her guts up all over again. What came next? Find Trav, and then what? She needed him to be there because he was her friend. She'd needed Abby. She'd needed Jennifer. The list could go on. She wanted to be there to stop the same thing happening as had happened to the others, but what else was there? She'd get unlucky or her guard would drop or-

Anything. Anything would happen, and then someone else would be dead, because it wasn't a plan.

She forced the panic down.

"It wasn't Trav because you only make a shitload of noise if you don't care about people knowing where you are, or are too stupid to work out that everyone will know where you are. And you only don't care because you want to bait people in to jump them, or want attention. So again, are either stupid or a psycho. Trav isn't. It's not Trav."

She glanced at the tower again and then set off for it, forcing her weary feet into the slowest jog in the world.

"Come with, if you want," she told Matt. "But don't fall behind."
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Ain't nobody got time for this · The Bell Tower