"We tried to be better, but we aren't. I don't think anyone could last more than a week here if they weren't willing to do bad things." - Alba Reyes

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Zetsumodernista
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escaping the real world to face reality
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Candy bars, huh? You offering Alan a nice tasty candy bar for his beautiful-as-shit badass lightsaber and yeah how about a no thank you on that. He should-- he should hold them up now. With his fucking toy lightsaber. It was for the greater good, right? Because if you don't hold them up for all their food, you hurt your chances of stopping grey goo and grey goo trumps fucking everything, and shit Alan go fuck off with this shit. Go fuck off with this shit before you actually convince yourself because hey Alan was a pretty persuasive guy, right? He was like really smart at making stupid stuff sound smart and shit you gotta control yourself man. Or at least until he had an actual plan or idea or something about how to rebel, but Alan doesn't do plans, does he?

Alan Banks doesn't control himself. You do not tell him to control himself. He is a force of nature. An agent of chaos. He is a-- oh, fuck it with the superlatives. Alan was going to think whatever he damn well pleases.

Hey Alan that girl's offering you something for nothing. She's pretty cool. Pretty chaotic. Bringing down capitalism and all that, yeah? And that other girl, Kaitlyn something, she's pretty cool, right?

Turn to the Asian girl. Say something. Say something epic back.

"Really? Cool. Hey, as a thank-you gift or a token of good will or some shit, I'll give you a free candy bar. For free."

Because fuck waiting until he was finished taking down the terrorists, he was gonna stick it to the man right now. The man. The fucking system. Burn it all down now. Send it all tumbling and crashing down. Like, he might not have the chance later, right?

"And Kaitlyn, I don't know but this place has some pretty sick deals on candy bars right now. So I'll give it a, um, C+ for effort. And, like, it's all your fault for getting put here, anyways. It's the government's punishment for libertarians."

Yeah. She'd love that.

Okay, so she won't but at least it'll make her stop being a fucking libertarian. Or at least make her become a better libertarian.

Oh wait she was a different kind of libertarian wasn't she.

Aww, fuck.
dear god dear god tinkle tinkle hoy

G056: Asuka Takahara: The one who can out-pretentious them all.
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