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Sure.

Diaries
Penelope smiled at Adelaide's comment on her tea.

Now you're getting it! She said, if only mentally. After Adelaide asked about Alessio's groceries, Penelope decided to jump in, always eager to insert herself into things and answer for people, whether they liked it or not. Without giving Alessio the chance to talk, she responded to Adelaide. "Uh, yeah! Alessio here was out doing some shopping for like..."

Penelope reached into Alessio's grocery bags and pulled out them various objects that were in them, listing them off as she went. "Things like milk... cheese... mostly food in here... oh, and meat." She put the meat back before turning her head up towards Alessio.

"Alessio, didn't I tell you that it's healthier to be a vegetarian?" she asked, while having her normal mischievous grin plastered on her face. She poked him a few times in the cheek. "Just teasing, I understand vegetarianism isn't for everyone."

Most people wouldn't be able to get away with shenanigans like this, but when it came to Penelope and her friends, a certain understanding was usually met, especially regarding her lack of a sense for personal space.

Penelope craned up slightly and wrapped her arms around Alessio's neckline. "Sorry if I took the wind out of your sails there."

She leaned her head back and turned it towards Adelaide once more. "Did that answer your question?"

Blair Moore
APPROVED

Diaries
Penelope leaned back on the park bench as Adelaide mentioned her meditation.

"Oh yeah, that? She said, casually. "I like coming out to areas like this and relaxing with it sometimes." Penelope picked up her bottle of tea and sipped at it. "Thinking about things and life in general, trying to attain nirvana." She turned a bit to get a more direct look at Adelaide. "It's all good for the mind and soul."

Penelope had always based her meditation techniques off of Buddhist meditation. Buddhism had always been the most interesting religion to Penelope, she loved the tenets of it and the practices, such as meditation. Buddhist style meditation was enjoyable to partake in and she always felt better about herself and life after doing so.

Penelope sipped her tea again. "Is there anything interesting you find about it in particular?"

New V5 Reduced Activity Notices
I probably should have mentioned this earlier, but I ran into some real life circumstances that severely limited my time in the recent two weeks and I'm sorry for any inconveniences it caused (mainly to the people in Penelope's thread, I will reply tomorrow morning and be prompt afterwards, I promise ; ;).

Blair Moore
Blair's looking a lot better! Just a few more things to sort out before Blair is all set!

Quote:
 
Name: Blair Moore
Gender: Female
Age: 18
Grade: 12th
School: Cochise High School
Hobbies and Interests: Poetry, roller skating, internet debating, Tumblr, science, Doctor Who

...

When Blair was about 13, she started spending time online, as her parents had purchased her a new computer. She liked the widespread information, and the chance to meet and talk to new people excited her, as she was somewhat bored with her small town. She frequented many political forums and other places of discussion, especially poetry boards, and found herself enamored with the opportunity to discuss and argue with people. An abrasive attitude quickly became apparent, however, as she refused to back down in disagreements and never accepted her own mistakes. She received a few warnings and even bans from some sites, but rather than change her attitude simply moved on to different groups that agreed with her more. She generally dismissed abuse or insults, being thick skinned and not one to take criticism to heart anyway. (I think you might have missed/forgotten about this, but I asked what exactly Blair liked about debating with people online. You mention she was "enamored with the opportunity to discuss and argue with people..." What I want to know is why so.)

...

In high school, Blair remained mostly unchanged. Her contrary nature and often pompous attitude continued to alienate others, but Blair took little mind of this, seeing many of her classmates as simple-minded hicks. She looked down on others and wasnít above poking fun at people with those she considered friends, who tended to be intellectual or artistic. She didnít get along well with those she perceived to be geeks or jocks, thinking of them as weird and dull-witted, respectively. She got decent grades, averaging a B- in most classes, but excelled in sciences, getting an A on most grades. (I think you might have missed this too, but I asked what changed about her that caused the improvement between elementary and high school. It doesn't have to be much, a simple explanation of being sick less or focusing more on actually doing well is sufficient.)

After browsing the internet for a few years, Blair stumbled across Tumblr when an online friend recommended it. While at first she struggled with the layout, Blair quickly became enamored with the site and its culture. She loved the enthusiasm, discussion and subtopics of Tumblr, and quickly established her own blog, where she discussed her feelings and illness. She also began taking up various opinions on different subjects, adopting a feminist stance after reading a number of convincing articles and blogs on the subject. She became rather aggressive and quick to jump on people if they disagreed with her stances, especially in online discussions. (Doesn't the subject matter (a website) already imply that it was in online discussions? Fortunately the "with her stances" fixes the sentence fragment issues, so just remove the "especially in online discussions".)

...


Post back here when you have the edits made. :)

The Mafia Waiting List
I think I should mention my bastard mafia is complete and can support 20-30 players (it's been complete since I first posted about it).

Hello! I can draw something for you if you'd like
Guys I died of laughter. Get the dragon balls.

Blair Moore
Hey there Espi! I'll be the staffer critiquing Blair today. Sorry for this critique taking so long. It's been fairly slow staff side as of late.

Unfortunately, Blair is DENIED pending revisions. My comments are in teal.

Quote:
 
Name: Blair Moore
Gender: Female
Age: 18
Grade: 12th
School: Cochise High School
Hobbies and Interests: Poetry, roller skating, internet debating, Tumblr, science, Doctor Who

Appearance: Blair is 5í4Ē tall and weighs about 105 pounds. She is very skinny, with bony limbs and no curves to speak of (Blair is just baaaaaarely underweight. While she would be skinny, her limbs wouldn't be bony and she wouldn't have no curves to speak of. Adjust this one way or another, please.). A natural brunette, Blairís hair is dyed black and worn in an unkempt shaggy bob, just above her shoulders in the back with long, parted bangs, which are dyed with red highlights. Her eyes are upturned, round and dark brown and she has dark shadows under them due to sleep deprivation, as she spends hours up late online. Blair is Caucasian; her skin is pale and she burns easily, leaving her with a streak of freckles across her nose. She often develops acne around her nose as well. Blairís round face is somewhat androgynous feature-wise, with a straight nose, a high brow, thin lips and arched eyebrows. She isnít especially pretty, and has a flat chest.

Blair dresses eclectically, sometimes wearing a simple t-shirt and jeans and other times dressing in more elaborate skirts and dresses. In general, she dresses for the weather and her mood, wearing nicer clothes when feeling more upbeat. When abducted, Blair was wearing a black t-shirt, jean shorts and dirty white sneakers with black socks. She occasionally dabbles in makeup, wearing red lip gloss and dark eyeliner, but usually forgoes it. She has no piercings.

Biography: The middle child of Damien and Theresa Moore, both natives to Kingman, Blair was two years younger than her sister Cynthia and a year older than her sister Miley. Damien worked as an electrician, while Theresa was a secretary. The family of five was of average middle class, and Theresa and Damien, an older couple who married late in life, invested much of their free time in their childrenís lives.

Shortly after Blairís birth, she developed meconium ileus, a condition where a newbornís bowels become obstructed. After receiving treatment, it became necessary to test Blair for cystic fibrosis, a genetic condition where mucus obstructs the lungs and causes problems with the digestive tract, among other serious medical issues. After a sweat test, it was determined that Blair did have cystic fibrosis. The family was subsequently devastated (fragment, add "at the news"). Cystic fibrosis was a life-threatening condition, and sufferers rarely lived past their forties. While they wanted her to live as normal a life as possible, Theresa and Damien feared for Blair for most of her life.

From an early age, Blair needed to be coddled somewhat, as she frequently experience lung infections and coughs, plus was quickly issued medication to thin the mucus buildup in her lungs and help her breathing. While as a toddler she was rambunctious and energetic, she missed school frequently due to sickness and had trouble with extended playing due to her cough and poor lung function. This frustrated her as a child, feeling that she was underprivileged and unable to keep up with other children. Blairís attitude was not helped when she began struggling with school, even as early as elementary school. Repeatedly missing school, combined with an innate difficulty with most subjects, led her to struggle with most of her courses. Blairís best subject was science, which she enjoyed and performed very well in. (This last part could flow a lot better. Perhaps revise it to say that "...her courses, except science, which she enjoyed and performed very well in despite her circumstances.")

Blair began seeing a child psychologist at age 8, in order to help her cope with her situation and help her deal with her mortality. Blair appreciated the outlet, and the social worker, a woman named Ms. Cole, proved to initially help with regards to Blairís concerns. Ms. Cole encouraged Blair to find hobbies to focus on and dreams to fulfill to avoid falling into a depression, which directly led to Blairís interest in poetry at age 10. Writing poetry had been something sheíd done in grade school, but after trying it out independently Blair found it a very rewarding means of expressing herself, occupying time and dealing with stress. Her style tended towards ("being") non-linear and chaotic, ("and") more stream-of-thought than planned. She also favored dark and sad subjects such as death, as the morbid topics made her feel better about herself by getting out unhealthy emotions on paper.

Blairís medical doctor also made recommendations for her in her youth, and he encouraged her to exercise to help clear her lungs and assist in breathing. Blair didnít really find sports appealing, considering them a waste of time, but after receiving a set of roller skates for a present when she was 12, Blair became interested in skating. Though she struggled with it at first, she eventually picked up skill and agility as a roller skater, becoming fairly proficient. (What does she enjoy about roller skating? Does she participate in competitions at any point? Does she do it a lot in her spare time?)

Because of her condition, Blair was somewhat spoiled by her parents. Her older sister Cynthia took well to this, being even-tempered and similarly concerned with Blairís well-being. Miley, though, often felt neglected by her parents, who generally sided with Blair in arguments and focused on her needs over her sisterís. This led to frequent arguments over the fairness of Blairís treatment, which Blair usually won. (I find it odd that a child would just give up on these arguments (thereby losing) with a sibling and then go at it again anyway repeatedly. I think it would be more likely that the child would argue and lose with Blair's parents rather than Blair herself or would just constantly argue with Blair without the arguments really getting anywhere in the end (and therefore not having a winner). If you want to keep Blair's proudness elements, perhaps have that extend from her being spoiled by her parents rather than just winning arguments with her sister that would likely just come down to stubbornness. This might seem to be an odd thing to pick at, but this becomes an important character trait for Blair, which means I need to look at more closely.) As a result, Blair slowly began to develop a proud streak, which continued as she got older. She had trouble admitting her own follies and rarely took blame, preferring to shift it onto others instead.

When Blair was about 13, she started spending time online, as her parents had purchased her a new computer. She liked the widespread information, and the chance to meet and talk to new people excited her, as she was somewhat bored with her small town. She frequented many political forums and other places of discussion, especially poetry boards, and found herself enamored with the opportunity to discuss and argue with people. An abrasive attitude quickly became apparent, however, as she refused to back down in disagreements and never accepted her own mistakes. She received a few warnings and even bans from some sites, but rather than change her attitude simply moved on to different groups that agreed with her more. (What did she like about debating with people online? Did that create any actual problems for her (like people being rude maybe ruining her mood)?)

Going into middle school, Blairís attitude problem gave her a reputation for being a problem student, as she was audacious enough to challenge teachers when she didnít agree, leading to punishment. Still, she started improving her grades as she became more determined to be successful despite her poor health. Blair had some friends, but also a penchant for making enemies, as she quickly caused conflict with her cocky attitude and refusal to back down or admit that she was wrong. She consequently became somewhat binary, with most classmates receiving either positive or negative treatment with little room in between. She tended to start arguments, though was never involved in physical confrontations. (Did Blair's parents try to stop this behavior at all due to teacher complaints? Certainly this kind of behavior would've been brought to their attention.)

Blair also became interested in roller derby in 8th grade. While she was never one for sports, she found interest when her older sister introduced a roller derby competition on television to Blair, who was fascinated by the toughness of the people involved as well as the skill and projected attitudes. While Kingman did not have a large roller derby community, Blair became interested in the sport, following it obsessively and practicing at the local skate rink. She appreciates the speed of the game as well as the aforementioned attitudes, and envisions herself with the moniker ďBlairís Witch ProjectĒ. (I'm confused at the wording here. Does she envision herself with that nickname or on a team with that name?)

Encouraged by her science teacher who took note of her enjoyment of the subject, Blair also began looking into the sciences outside of class. She found the functions of the natural world fascinating, especially biology and astronomy as the most coherent fields to a novice, though most fields interested her on some level. She primarily read articles and nonfiction books, as well as using the internet to research facts and information.

In high school, Blair remained mostly unchanged. Her contrary nature and often pompous attitude continued to alienate others, but Blair took little mind of this, seeing many of her classmates as simple-minded hicks. She looked down on others and wasnít above picking (poking) fun at people with those she considered friends, who tended to be intellectual or artistic. She didnít get along well with those she perceived to be geeks or jocks, thinking of them as weird and dull-witted, respectively. She got decent grades, averaging a B- in most classes, but excelled in sciences, getting an A on most grades. (What changed about Blair that improved her school performance between elementary and high school?)

After browsing the internet for a few years, Blair stumbled across Tumblr when an online friend recommended it. While at first she struggled with the layout, Blair quickly became enamored with the site and its culture. She loved the enthusiasm, discussion and subtopics of Tumblr, and quickly established her own blog, where she discussed her feelings and illness. She also began taking up various opinions on different subjects, adopting a feminist stance after reading a number of convincing articles and blogs on the subject. She became rather aggressive and quick to jump on people if they disagreed. (This sentence needs more elaboration to flow better and not be a sentence fragment. Expand it perhaps to: "She was rather aggressive and quick to jump on people if they disagreed with her opinions, like she did elsewhere on the internet.")

While on Tumblr, Blair became interested in discussion on certain TV shows, especially Doctor Who. The long history and deep culture made it somewhat intimidating, but Blair resolved to watch the show to figure out what people were talking about. She quickly fell in love, spending hours a day watching it until she was caught up in her junior year. She loved the characters, the uniqueness, and the different emotions it could inspire, plus the deep and extensive fandom it had developed. She continued to watch new episodes throughout senior year.

Blairís home life has remained in a stable equilibrium for most of her life. Her parents are loving but very protective, siding with Blair in conflicts and giving her anything she wanted. Blair appreciates this, but often pushes them away out of feelings of rebelliousness, which only adds to their concern. Cynthia and Blair had never interacted much, as Cynthia spent most of her time studying or hanging out with friends, and is currently attending college in Colorado. Miley and Blair donít get along, as Miley feels Blair is unpleasant and spoiled, and Blair thinks of Miley as a brat and immature. Blair still visits Ms. Cole on a bi-weekly basis, chatting about her feelings and concerns. The two get along well, though Blair tends to do most of the talking in their discussions.

Blair hopes to leave Arizona as soon as she can graduate, feeling tied down by Kingman. She plans to move to New York City, Seattle or another large city, and attend college, ideally studying biology or a similar science. Before that though, she wants to travel the world and enjoy herself, feeling that doing too much in the way of responsibility is a waste when she only has a few yearsí time left because of her condition. (Her prospect of living to 40 is a pretty decent amount of time, considering her condition. Perhaps change this to be "when she has less time left than most other people do" just for consistency's sake.) She hopes to live in the UK at some point as well, owing to her numerous online friends in the country and her perceived experience with the culture. She hopes to be either a biologist or a poet, or possibly both if she can manage to write in her spare time. She still has interest in roller derby, but mostly skates casually or as a means of transport and exercise as of late.

While she is often in poor health resulting from her condition, Blair is fairly well-adjusted, though she occasionally suffers bouts of depression or anxiety. She can be arrogant, and is quick to dismiss others if she doesnít value their opinion. She is nicer to her friends, but even then will occasionally give a backhanded compliment or treat them in a condescending manner. Her closest friends thus tend to be people who she can gossip with and are thick-skinned, and especially people who are members of her online communities. She is somewhat self-centered, placing high value on herself, and is often outright rude. However, she is also surprisingly funny and aware, and capable of making jokes at her own expense, though she doesnít take well to others attempting to do the same. In general, she doesnít own up to her mistakes, and assumes she is never in the wrong.

Advantages: Blair is independent and surprisingly tough mentally, able to deal with thoughts of mortality due to her condition. Blair is surprisingly intelligent and may catch people by surprise. (Blair's got a lot of disadvantages! Try to come up with another advantage just to even things out a bit.)
Disadvantages: Blairís biggest weakness is her cystic fibrosis, which leaves her with poor stamina and high risk for lung infections among other potentially crippling health issues. She is cocky and may think sheís better-suited than she is, potentially making errors in judgment. Blair is also somewhat standoffish and prone to causing conflict with her arrogance, which pushes people away.


Post back here when you have the edits made and I will help you in round two. :)


LoL Thread, PRESEASON edition: MORE DOTS MORE DOTS
MK Kilmarnock
Jul 6 2015, 09:51 AM
This is exactly what happened to CLG last year, too.

Between C9 and CLG I'm fucking sunk. -_-
TSM TSM TSM?

LoL Thread, PRESEASON edition: MORE DOTS MORE DOTS
Rattlesnake
Jul 5 2015, 07:47 PM
I believe we have a new record for competitive play.

In a game lasting 39 minutes and 31 seconds, C9 "Incanati0n" Incarnati0n did not use his ultimate a single time.
...Who was he playing?

LoL Thread, PRESEASON edition: MORE DOTS MORE DOTS
Very spoopy Rek'Sai.

V5 Epilogue Discussion Thread
Really cool so far, Rugga! I wait patiently for more. :3

Samantha "Sam" West
This character biography has had no alterations for more than two weeks and has been put in the abandoned characters forum. This profile is eligible for resubmission by the handler upon alterations requested by the staff.