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TurtleTyrant's Death Critiques
I finally found the time in between faffing about in The Binding of Isaac Rebirth to do another one of these.

Michael Mitchellson

I think that I have established that I like Michael, he's funny and I enjoyed reading his story a lot. However, his death I was not quite as fond of compared to the rest of his story. The scene and how it was set up was great; Boogie, Snarft, and Medic did a good job setting a good pace and build up for the death, but the cause of death (Michael accidentally shooting himself) felt anti-climactic and didn't really make all that much sense from a reader's perspective/mesh with the scene all that well. As for the death post itself and Michael's internal reaction to it, I liked his reaction and the parallel structure that boogie used at the end with Michael's crawling. Michael's death really made me feel bad for him, despite my confusion to the cause of his death.

This is another one I wanted to elaborate more on, specifically about how the cause of death confused me and such since it's a big part of my lack of fondness, so... Dmboogie, I invite you to PM me for elaboration on what I found confusing about Michael's death.

No, that is not an invitation for ALL of you to PM me. :V

More to come later.

Spoiler: click to toggle

So that happened.

TurtleTyrant's Death Critiques
Woo more child murder! Reminds me of a couple months ago when a kid shot another kid near my school.

Adonis Alba

I'll admit I haven't read Adonis' (admittedly short) story, but I liked his death. In the scene leading up to the death I really liked the humor value of the minor confusion Adonis had over Joachim saying "mur-killers" and Adonis acting like he was tough shit when he began fighting/finished fighting Joachim. I liked how Aura wrote the sudden realization that Adonis was done for, and the jarring change from how he was acting just a post ago was handled well. I liked the thoughts of regret and that Aura didn't go for a "everything's okay" death (I hate "everything's okay" deaths). However, I really wish that Aura had done a bit more with the death; I can't name exactly how it was lacking, but after reading it I felt as if something more could have been done (perhaps elaborating on feelings regarding the things Adonis thought about besides his regrets).

Only one for now because of time constraints I am under. Also, if I can make a little note to everyone: I would super duper appreciate it if people put their thoughts on my two characters on the wiki. Nobody's obligated to but I really love getting people's thoughts so I can improve.

TurtleTyrant's Death Critiques
Had a two hour delay because of snow. Let's get two knocked out just to give you guys some examples.

Marcus Leung

Marcus's death was... interesting... when I first read it. I didn't really know what to think originally, but reading it over again now though I have a few thoughts on it. In hindsight the death scene itself was set up surprisingly well, especially given that it was a spur of the moment thing. While I personally would have liked /something/ coming from the actual death post, the death itself having no text makes sense given the short, detached posts that came before it from both Unpy and Snarft and ties the scene together well. Additionally, there's something elegant in just having Marcus die like that without so much as a whimper or a thought, and not making any spectacle whatsoever out of the death is something unique that I do appreciate.

Rosemary Michaels

Ahhh, MrMissMrs Random, you spoil me. I made it clear in V5's endgame plastic hammers that I adore Retrograde, and I mean it. Retrograde is paced extremely well, having good buildup to that critical moment where Katarina solidifies her resolve and strangles Rosemary, creating a great sense suspense even though the conclusion (at the time because of rolls) was forgone. As for Rosemary's death itself... Random really captures a kind of sad struggle as Rosemary tries to fight against Katarina and cling to life oh so desperately, focusing on that instinctual desire to live and the fight for it rather than any great philosophical ranting or sad reflection on life. All in all I found Retrograde and Rosemary's death to be a fitting end to the story of the poor girl and it's one of my favorite deaths in V5.

Man sometimes five sentences isn't enough (I really wanted to talk more about these two) but that's my rule and otherwise I would go on for days. Oh well. More later.

TurtleTyrant's Death Critiques
Hey all.

So with all the major work I've had to do for school (mostly) finished and the fact that I've been out of V5, I've had too much time on my hands and not enough stuff to do with that time.

I thought about making a critique thread ala NAFT's or MW's small critiques, but I didn't want to painstakingly read all of 50 characters (and you guys know I'd have to if I was serious about this, you're vultures, all of you). So, I'm doing something a bit... different.

I've read every death in V5. All of them. It's a habit I picked up about halfway through and I've since gone through and read every single death in V5 that I either missed originally or as they came. I am more than happy to read them again and regurgitate my opinions on the death to you guys if you ask (or if I remember them well enough, regurgitate my opinion on the spot).

Rules: Since I've only read V5 deaths and not mini deaths, I'm limiting this to V5 characters only. Additionally, all of these critiques come in five sentences or less, more in order to keep me from rambling on and on about every little detail and make sure that I actually do these things (*cough*) than to be lazy.

Otherwise, no other rules. Want to sign up all of your V5 characters at once? Go right ahead. Want to sign up even though it's forty characters in? Go right ahead. Want to berate my intelligence? Go right ahead. Want to confess your undying love to me? Go right ahead, but I think PMs would be a more appropriate place for that.

Queue For My Sanity

I pretty much agree with everyone here.

ANYWAY, I won't be participating in any blood drives because I have a very bad fear of blood and needles, even though I am O negative and therefore sorta kinda rare. :c

V5 Endgame Plastic Hammers
The Plastic Hammer Awards!

The Basics

Handler Name: TurtleTyrant

Your Trademark Character: Madeline since she made it to the final ten.

Current Status of Trademark Character: Dead after realizing her life is meaningless.

Favorite Character: Tough question. Amaranta Montalvo is the only character I have no real gripes with besides community reactions to her.

Favorite Weapon: Sorta self pimping but the gun-knife is badass in concept. Weaker in execution.

Favorite Scene: Retrograde hands down. It's really well set up and I can't get over how awesome it was to me.

Favorite Death: Sean Mulcahy's death and death thread.

Favorite Quote: Anything said by Michael Mitchellson. Anything.

Favorite Post: Probably something in Retrograde or one of Naft's longer posts. I dunno.

Favorite Location: The Lighthouse.


Best Character Development: The character development of Mara, Hansel, Joe, and KK. Sansa's Bella had a really good slow sanity slippage.

Best Game Impact: Positive development? I can't say it's really positive but Hansel and KK have had huge impact in a lot of stories because of their murder sprees.

Best Innovation: I... don't know? I was only around for V5 so I can't say anyone really innovated from my perspective. Besides, well, everyone.

Best Realism: Tough question. I'd say random's Rosemary was fairly realistic.

Best Heroic Character: Michelle Wexler (more) and Rosemary Michaels (less).

Best Villainous Character: She has her issues but Katarina Konipaski.

Best Tragic Character: I don't really have a most tragic character. Everyone, honestly.

Best Humorous Character: Michael Mitchellson.

Best Tactics: *shrug*

The Sympathy Award: Again, sorta everyone. As long as they weren't mass murderers.

The Empathy Award: Well. If I'm being honest, Madeline... since she's got a good chunk of my own personality traits and a lot of my own thoughts on matters went into her writing.

The Gone-Too-Soon Award: I think most people died at appropriate points.

The He-Had-It-Coming Award: Hansel Williams as long as he dies. If he lives (screams internally) then probably Katarina.

Scenes and Deaths

Best Tragedy: Michelle Wexler's death had me all sad faced for a decent chunk of time.

The Stomach-Churner: Jesus do you even need to ask? Big Stick Ideology by far. Actually anything Summer was involved in, honestly.

Best Impact: The escape, if I'm being serious. Its failure had a big impact on a lot of characters and cemented the dreary and depressing tone of V5.

Best Comedy: Just go read Michael Mitchellson.

The Sunglasses-and-Explosions Award: Any time that Hansel got into a fight.

Best Feeling-Inducer: Retrograde. Seriously go read it now.

Best Drama: Well I would say the final ten but I knew what was up. ;) In all seriousness, probably KK vs Hansel and the end of their rivalry because the scene was tense.

Best Surprise: A lot of the deaths were really out of nowhere and really well handled, I can't pick one.

Predictions, Preferences, and Positions

If you could change ANYTHING that has happened thus far, what would you change? (Bonus points: Not the crash) I would want to change the endgame roster a bit as it stands but otherwise probably I would go back and fix some of Sara's scenes.

There are four remaining characters. Who are you counting on to be the overall winner of V5? Amaranta Montalvo.

How do you predict the ending of V5 is going to turn out? With explosions. If something DOESN'T explode I'll be disappointed.

How much did you enjoy/not enjoy V5? I enjoyed V5 quite a lot, I can't really say there was anything really bad about it, with the exception of the crash killing a lot of people's motivation, myself included.

What do you like the most about V5? The sheer quality of writing across the board. V5 cannot be compared to the previous versions in sheer quality and community involvement.

What do you think could have been better about the version? V5 could stand to be a little less grimdark. It's pretty depressing as it stands and that makes me all sad, even if I do appreciate it from a story standpoint. I'm hoping V6 has a little more hope to it.

What do you think of the overall SOTF story? SOTF needs to be moving somewhere, in my opinion. Metaplot shouldn't get in the way of the roleplay but there should be something mixing it up every version, at least a little bit.

How do you feel about V5 compared to prior versions? "V5 cannot be compared to the previous versions in sheer quality and community involvement."

How do you think V6 will differ from/compare to V5 and prior versions? No idea. Hopefully it will be even better.

Talk About Yourself

What has been your favorite thing to write in V5? Anything with Maddie and RJ and Maddie in general. I really enjoyed writing pirate Sara while it lasted.

Which of your V5 characters was your favorite to write? Sara was actually more fun to write while she lasted, Maddie later surpassed how much fun I had with Sara once RJ and Maddie became a duo.

What are you proudest of in V5? Maddie's death. I poured a lot of my feelings from my darkest moments into it, and I hope it turned out well.

What do you wish you could improve? Sara's stuff, mostly. Some of the early Maddie stuff too, albeit less so.

What is your favorite V5 memory? Writing with Un-Persona. Go give him a virtual hug or something.

What else would you like to share? Anything goes!

Thanks to everyone who participated in V5 for making my time participating truly an amazing experience.

I've grown significantly as a writer and as a person since I joined SOTF, and for that, I thank all of you. :)