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The V2 Read-o-thon
I heard Mai committed a pregame murder and was instantly sold on this.

Running commentary


Ok so, to give a serious critique of Mai.

In short, she's not great.

In a slightly longer form:

Besides the entire pregame murder deal, her voice and character just aren't that interesting and we never get to see another side of her other than the ugly person who killed her best friend over a role in a play. Like a lot of V2 and some of V3 there's the basis for some interesting character work there. The jealous friend who sabotages her bestie to get what she wants and there could be some interesting explorations of jealously and self-worth as well as self-esteem issues given her dance instructor and best friends fixation of physical appearance.

Instead what we get is a shallow evil character who just isn't very interesting and going onto the island doesn't help this out much.

Part of this may be that Jack's original handler went AWOL so Mai's handler took over. Now obviously it's not ideal but if you were going to stick with it you'd imagine the greater degree of control over both characters would mean you're able to produce something with a lot of detail and interesting bit. Unfortunately this doesn't happen either. The rest of Mai's threads end up being her having conversations with Jack which means that they all end up being lines of dialogue with no description or thoughts behind them. This ends up really hurting everything because the dialogue we're given doesn't have much depth to it, it's just the kind of the regular conversations you'd expect from characters stuck in SOTF but without knowing what's going on in the characters heads it comes off as fairly bland. That and due to the weird red text stuff we're left waiting for the moment Mai turns on him.

This moment never comes though. Ok that's not entirely true, we do get this moment but it doesn't come in the way that is being built up. Which doesn't mean its a good surprise, it's almost the opposite since the foreshadowing we were being given has us expecting Mai to just kill Jack because she wants to move on and she killed her best friend in pregame. Because of a play.

The other issue is the whole death sequence starting from Mai chugging her poison capsules in an attempt to commit suicide. As soon as this happens Jack instantly realizes she killed Kim. It seems to come too fast as a realization and while I'm aware it's probably for the purpose of getting deaths done it still doesn't quite hit the mark. It's just too soon to reach this point in their stories. This then also causes a continuity snafu as Mai fights off the effects of the poison for a massive amount of time, catching up to Jack and killing him. The death itself, is a bit of a mess as well due to the formatting choices that were made. Also she tears his face off.

Overall I can't say I'd recommend Mai. Not even for the curiosity factor of the pregame murder. She has the potential to be interesting and hit some intriguing themes but she's a victim of most of the early being very similar to Battle Royale in that most characters are exaggerated archetypes. It makes her come off as very flat, and worse boring. It's disappointing because there could be so much more here, but the choices of how her on island story plays out and how it's presented to us undercut all of it.

But hey, she'll always have the pregame murder.

Posted Image

V6 Twentieth Rolls
The RNG Gods finally got Kimiko

Thank you to RC, Bikriki, MK Kilmarnock and Ruggahissy for heroing Kimiko and allowing me to continue writing her

Zee, Laurels and Riki for putting together an awesome final thread for Kimiko and Lore for giving me running critique on how Kimiko was doing.

Hope everyone enjoyed her, good luck to the endgamers I'm sure you'll produce something special and I'll see you guys in V7.

Worm Mafia
Primrosette
Aug 21 2017, 04:51 AM
Yeah, you can lynch me. I have not been keeping up in this game.
Yeah kinda don't want to since we may lose if we just lynch you for no reason

Worm Mafia
Point out where I have even so much as done what you've just said

Worm Mafia
Doubly important info.

I mean lurking mafia seems most likely at this point

Worm Mafia
Hmm.

So realistically we're at an impasse because any lynch we try to make is practically a shot in the dark due to the way the game has gone.

Worm Mafia
Hard to tell if the bus driver claim is legit without verifying some other way.

We need to be careful with the lynch though because I think we're fairly close to the game being over?

Battle Royale
Upon entering the kitchen there was nothing. No gunshots, no yells, no crying. It was almost completely silent.

Almost.

Kimiko had been able to hear someone breathing. She had crept forward and rounded a block of counters.

That was when she saw Alba.

In that moment she realised what had happened.

She started to spin on her heel, eyes still focused on Alba.

Then she was engulfed.

The force of the explosion in the confined space flung her around, the assault rifle flew from her grip and then she slammed back first against a wall.

Something was lodged in her throat. She could feel it sitting just above her collar but she couldn't see it. She couldn't see anything.

Her left hand tried to reach up but she lacked the strength.

It was over.

She knew that much.

She'd failed.

She'd failed Caleb.

After everything she had been through, all of it was for nothing.

Her head was starting to feel lighter, the blood loss beginning to take effect.

She didn't know what would happen next. What was going to happen to her? Would she get to see Caleb? Her soul would move on but she didn't know what afterlife she'd be granted. After everything she had done she didn't think she'd be judged well and that truth scared her.

She mouthed an apology to her parents for them having to witness everything she had done.

To Caleb for failing to make his sacrifice worthwhile and meaningful.

And to everyone else who she had hurt, although she knew they were empty words.

Finally she bowed her head as she mouthed a prayer for herself but she knew that it was too late and she didn't deserve one.

Her thoughts started to become hazy and muddled as the pain began to subside.

She hoped she'd see Caleb.

She wanted to see him again, more than anything, so she could say she was sorry.

She blinked and closed her eyes.

When she opened them she saw nothing.

G015: Kao, Kimiko
Guò shì
Hái shèng 7 míng xuéshēng

Battle Royale
What felt like an eternity passed as Kimiko waited for any sign that Fiyori or Alba were going to try and return fire. It soon became clear that it wasn't going to happen. They were in the kitchen or they had escaped.

She shrugged in response to Min-Jae's question. She had no idea if there was a way out of the kitchen. Her first experience in the cafeteria had been the gunfight.

She turned her head to him and mouthed two words.

"No idea."

It left them in an awkward situation as they could hardly sit behind the table waiting for the announcement to tell them the status of the two girls.

They had one option that wasn't leaving the cafeteria there and then. Leaving presented its own problems as they'd potentially be leaving alive two people who wanted them dead. There was no room for uncertainty like that. Not if she intended to survive.

She took her hands off the assault rifle to quickly sign to Min-Jae.

"We need to go check, to make sure."

Worm Mafia
Damn right.

Umm but on a more serious note, I have next to nothing and with how silent everything is I'm short on any real ideas that don't just involve us going over the same ground we've already traveled twice now.

Battle Royale
The hail of bullets from Alba stopped as Kimiko's own shots hit her legs. Then she saw Alba get hit by Min-Jae's shots and fall back into the kitchen.

As soon as it happened Kimiko pushed herself up into a crouch to move away from where she had been. It turned out to be a smart decision as one of the two girls returned fire. She felt a bullet graze her leg, slicing through the top layers of skin. It burned almost as badly as her ear did but she ignored it and kept moving.

Until mercifully, the cafeteria fell silent for the first time since she had entered it. The brief moment of respite allowed her to check her ear with her hand. She assumed it was bad since she could feel the blood from it running down the side of her face and her neck, it was starting to soak her shoulder as well.

She was met with a sharp and intense stabbing pain as soon as her hand touched and when she brought it back it was saturated in the crimson red of her blood. The closest approximation she could think of was if she had dipped her hand in a bowl of the fake blood people used at Halloween.

Her eyes scanned the doors that Alba had fallen through and Fiyori had shot from, she presumed it led to the kitchen.

They had retreated deeper inside.

Kimiko popped the assault rifles magazine out and tried to count how many bullets she had before deciding to just reload the whole thing, stashing the other magazine in her bag

She rested the assault rifle on the table, keeping it trained on the doors as she waited for Min-Jae to catch up with her.

Worm Mafia

Worm Mafia
Yeah the lovers thing is really going to be an issue because we're going to lose someone tonight regardless most likely.

That and a lot of the angles we could have approached from have been completely blocked off by the deaths.

The situation is...not ideal.

Battle Royale
Fiyori started firing as all semblance of the situation being under control was destroyed. The bullets from Fiyori's gun smashed something behind Kimiko, causing a light rain of dust to fall onto her.

Their plan was to fall back into the kitchen. Kimiko had no idea of whether the room contained an exit they were planning on using to escape or if they were just falling back because there was more cover available to them.

Staying low and behind the table Kimiko moved further to the side of the room and out of Alba and Fiyori's combined fire.

She had no way of communicating with Min-Jae which put them at a disadvantage but he seemed to be using the doorway they'd entered through as cover.

Alba's sweeping arc of fire made it next to impossible for Kimiko to raise her head up and return fire.

Instead she did the opposite and dropped to her side on the floor. Taking a moment to brace the gun against her body before firing at Alba's legs.

Worm Mafia
I am here and alive. But will give more thoughts in the morning.

Battle Royale
Kimiko saw Alba begin to raise her gun and dove to the side.

She wasn't quick enough.

There was a burning at the tip of her ear and she instinctively reached up to feel it. It was a ragged mess and her hand came back covered in blood. Luckily it wasn't anything life-threatening. The rest of Alba's shots slammed home into the wall where Kimiko had been standing, so things could have been much worse.

Scrambling Kimiko plucked the assault rifle off the floor and got herself up to one knee. Using the table she had taken cover behind to brace the gun she placed her sights over Alba and let loose with a burst of fire at the girl.

There was no other option.

Battle Royale
((Kimiko Kao continued from Takasago))

Their progress had been slow, but it wasn't something Kimiko was going to complain about. She had expected things to be slow. It didn't look like Min-Jae was capable of anything more than an excruciating painful gait.

They hadn't encountered anybody though which was both good and bad. It was good because it meant they hadn't been required to go through the risk of a fight or tense standoff, which would have had a good change of turning ugly, considering who they were and how many weapons she visibly possessed. She had the assault rifle in her hands, and the nodachi slung over her back along with her bag, but the end of the glock was also visible in her pocket while the tantō remained out of sight in her other pocket. Layers of visible and invisible protection in case anyone came to her with violence in their minds. The downside of their decision however was that it left them to wonder with no real goal or plan. It was a waste of their time and energy. Kimiko felt it was a waste of Min-Jae's energy more than hers. He could have used the time they had spent walking to rest and recuperate from his injuries. Instead they were blindly moving through corridors in the asylum.

The asylum itself was silent. It's long hallways feeling especially cavernous and deserted now that they were down to the final few. Despite Min-Jae's presence Kimiko couldn't help feeling alone. There was no fooling herself. The alliance with Min-Jae was one of convenience born from the fact they had been friends once. Kimiko was under no illusions that only one of them could leave the island alive. That was a problem for the future however.

For now they had decided to stop in the cafeteria. Kimiko had never been in the cafeteria, she had never decided to explore much of the asylum. Instead she had spent much of her time outside of it or only staying in specific rooms. Her knowledge of all the different corners of the place wasn't good.

Regardless she turned back to Min-Jae, who was further down the corridor due to his struggles with movement, and pointed at the cafeteria's large wooden door before pushing it open and entering.

As soon as she did so she saw Fiyori Senay and Alba Reyes. Kimiko hadn't seen Fiyori in all her time on the island but knew who she was from around Cochise. Alba she had seen, once at the very beginning of her time on the island. She had been there when Kimiko had killed Bradley.

They both had guns.

Kimiko looked between the two as her heartbeat began to speed up and body tensed.

What was going to happen she couldn't say for sure.

But she knew deep down that violence was the only conclusion.

Three sentences about your kid: Critique experiment.
Let's have you critique all of my V6 guys before this is done.

Here's Kimiko Kao and Travis Lynch

Takasago
Kimiko nodded and stood. Nothing more needed to be said.

She stood, grabbing her bag and rifle.

It was time to leave her den of respite and venture out into the asylum properly. This time though she had a companion.

What difference that would make she couldn't say, but she felt like her choice was the right one.

((Kimiko Kao continued elsewhere...))

Takasago
There was a lengthy silence as Min-Jae's question hung in the air.

Kimiko had been alone for her whole time on the island. Every other meeting with someone had been temporary.

She nodded.

"Yes."