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What should I choose?; My former dream or someone else's happiness?
Topic Started: Thursday 17-11-2011, 22:16 (94 Views)
FraN
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2 days ago my mother confessed that she just doesn't divorce because of me and my brother: she couldn't afford the life cost, my father couldn't take care (tbh, I wouldn't like to live with him).

I wasn't surprised (the reasons are subject for other topic) but... well, I'm 21 and my brother is 19, we could find jobs. The thing is: I was planning to keep with the internship until my graduation, and only then (during master degree) I would get enough money from scholarship to live by myself (or almost).

That vent made me think that this unsafe route is more risky than I thought. There is at least 1 year until my graduation, and if I fail in a class (there's 1 this semester...) I won't get a good scholarship for master degree.



Also, I'm not so sure about the academic career. I started my graduation dreaming about being a researcher. However, I feel I might not be so competent. Quitting now and finding a job could save me a lot of time.

But then my chances to visit/live in another country are drastically reduced, at least in short-term.




I was thinking to let my luck decide it for me: getting good grades in that class would let me fight for scholarships; failing, I quit the academic life and go to some company, maybe even a bank, and make more monies.
Problem is: my luck sucks.

What do I do?
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Cole
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I'm Coming Home
Your life doesn't suck too bad: at least you have this problem to toss around and come to a decision on.

Not sure what you were saying in the opening, though - your mother told you the only reason she hasn't divorced your father is because of you and your brother? If that's so, that's pretty damn normal in the scope of things. They usually won't straight up tell you that, but it sounds like your mom is being real with you.

What exactly are you going to school for right now? And what employment options would you have if you dropped out right now?

I'd never try to give you an answer on such an important thing, but I feel like with more information it might be easier for someone else who has been in the situation to help you with some guidance.
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FraN
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I said my luck sucks, not my life. ;)


Yes, she said basically that. it would be normal if I was 10, but we are grown up already! That made me feel so bad.


I wouldn't drop school. I would move to the night classes (yes, becoming a zombie or take +2 years to graduate). I would drop my academic career. My goal would be becoming an executive instead of a scientist. I don't know if I'm ready for this exchange this sudden.
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`roboteectoast
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ALL IRONS IRON IRON !
Oh I think I understand. Your mother is staying with your father so she can support you and your brother, despite being over 18, you're accustomed to the lifestyle in prospect of your education.
I say do nothing, to be quite honest. Would your mother necessarily be happy if she were to leave your father? And nevertheless, she probably shouldn't have told you that because it places this unnecessary pressure on you. Don't give up your dreams, let things run their course. If push comes to shove and your mother leaves your father (despite your brother and you) then you can sort it out then.
Focus on yourself for now.
Edited by `roboteectoast, Friday 18-11-2011, 02:49.
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FraN
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Perfect summary, Tashee!
Thank you for the advice too. :)

Z, this topic was meant mainly for discussions, so I can decide what I do (maybe I should have posted this instead of help requests).
Obviously, it doesn't mean that won't take Tashee's advice in count. <.<
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OHJOY90
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Err, keep on trucking dude. >_>b
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