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| Face Thy Fears, Raise Thy Sword; Albion - Freeform | |
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| Topic Started: Sep 27 2010, 10:19 PM (180 Views) | |
| Kirin | Sep 27 2010, 10:19 PM Post #1 |
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Kirin the Bloodedge
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Word Count: 12,161 Summary: Albion takes some time to relax with his younger sister in Escennia and introduces a new member to his team - before coming face-to-face with the killer from his nightmares in the most violent fight for his life he could imagine. Goals: Just aiming for some EXP, really. Not fussed on the rewards. Notes: This is twice as long as I expected it to be. I am happy with it. Please critique any crapness this has. So far, their journey had spanned all of a single day, and it had been a rather eventful one at that. Not only had Albion managed to defeat his first Pokmon, but he had also signed up for the Opaddeka Military Establishment on Icicle Island, flown for the first time in a helicopter and even had his first battle against another Pokmon Trainer. Yes, it had all been a very exciting time for Albion; it was a day of great amounts of learning and understanding just what it meant to be a Pokmon Trainer and how that affected those around him. Granted, those around him were not exactly numerous, just yet. Albion Marius had only one Pokmon partner, a Ponyta named Winston. This horse had been his steed for many years. Or would be a real steed when he evolved into the glorious Rapidash he dreamed of being. For the time being, Winston was a companion, an ally, and most importantly, a friend. Albion treated him with nothing but compassion and respect, hoping that it was this bond that would be the indefatigable strength that the squire in training could draw upon in the darkest times of need. Besides, what good was a knight without his steed? They were partners through thick and thin, and that was that. Nothing else really needed to be said on the matter because Albion knew that, for as long as humanly possible, he would be with his partner. The two of them were now spending some time in one of Escennias many parks. Verdant grass lay underfoot whilst the air stayed aromatic with the scent of fresh flowers and plants, lending colour and life to the hilltop city. Many people came to these parks all across Escennia to relax, to exercise, to spend time with friends or to meet some new people. Those were but a few of the reasons, too; places like this were a great place to come and unwind. This was one of those days that Albion needed to spend some time recuperating after a few very hectic hours of introduction to the wide world of Pokmon, hence, hed decided to come to this park and give Winston a chance to relax too. After all, his partner had been through a lot that day. A quick check and, yes, there he was; the Ponyta was currently galloping around the paddocks, neighing, whinnying, stomping and generally having an extremely good time of himself, which was the result Albion was looking for. The day had been particularly harrowing; first, a battle against a particularly ornery Voltorb as the young horses first foray into combat. A few hours later, there was a second clash with a Mightyena that, in a single strike, almost broke the poor things leg, held inside the confines of the Opaddeka Military Establishments rarely used Battle Simulator. It had not been the most ideal day for Winston, and Albion wanted to recoup all of that with a bit of care for the poor little Ponyta. Winston! Albion called from the park bench overlooking the little pond with reeds, gaze then upon the galloping Ponyta that charged for its trainer with glee, even going so far as to leap through the air and land right in front of the armour-clad squire. It was clear to Albion that the horse was enjoying himself that day, a freedom from what short times it had ruefully been forced to spend within the confines of a Pok Ball, an unfortunate circumstance that Albion did not wish to repeat for the rest of that day. For now, the idea seemed to be working a charm, and Winston was enjoying himself more than Albion had seen all day. This was a relief to the young Trainer who knew that things would only become more harrowing on his quest to become a full Knight of Escennia. Hed need the loyal support of his steed in order to fulfil that task. Albion reached his hand out to scratch behind Winstons ears, to which the Ponyta responded with a brilliant happy neigh. The happiness at such simple things could not be ignored or diminished, and Albion couldnt help but smile at the simple fact that his friend was having so much fun. It was reasonably often that theyd gone for walks together throughout the streets of Escennia, but a real chance to get out and let loose in a place like this was a rare treat. The Ponyta showed his gratefulness to Albion by licking the humans face. Albion tried to squirm away; Winstons tongue being wet and tickling his face, it was not the most enjoyable feeling, even if it was hilarious. Winston! Aaaaugh! the young man shouted, all the while laughing and attempting with considerable vigour to squirm away, even with the park bench impeding progress. Moments like these were fun, even if they were still a little strange. They were worth it, though; to build trust between himself and Winston was his ultimate goal. So what if he wasnt the best fighter ever? That wasnt Albions goal. With the Ponyta, he just wanted a friend. Winston suddenly leapt up onto the bench, sitting on Albions stomach and holding him there. It was a little awkward-looking for the Ponyta to be doing that, but it served its purpose; Albion wasnt going anywhere. Another glorious neigh and Albion burst out laughing, the rich peal playing out over the parks landscape resounding with pure joy. He felt so much younger again, like a little kid, having fun with his family in the park. It was a reminder of the times when it was himself, his father and mother, his brother and sister, but those times were now long gone. And who ever said that a grown man couldnt have childish fun sometimes? Life was to be lived, loved and enjoyed, and all that jazz. A few moments of respite from the chaos that was being in the military and a Pokmon Trainer couldnt hurt. A sudden voice made Albions head snap up, though. Hey, Albion, having fun playing My Little Pony? That voice was absolutely unmistakeable. It was his sister, Sally. How could he not know that voice, having heard it nigh on every day for the past sixteen years? It was bright, cheery and always full of energy. She seemed to have a never-ending supply of vitality, which tended to reflect in the people around her. It was always good to have Sally around, if only because her ponytail-tied, red-dyed hair was always a relieving sight. Albion had always been her protector as the brother closest to her in age; Damien, the eldest child, had always been a little more introverted and violent. Albion was the calmer voice of reason, always able to keep his cool and look out for his little sister who always got picked on. Now, though, the tables were turning as Sally grew older - she was sixteen this year - and she became more of an independent person in her own right with a very fashionable sense of style. She got the attention of boys and she liked it. Albion half-sat up with Winston still on his chest, grinning broadly at the surprise appearance of his little sister. The clanking of the steel plate armour he wore accompanied every movement. Hey there, Sally. Fancy seeing you out here! What are you doing? he asked, knowing that getting up would be silly with Winston nudging his face every now and then. Oh, you know, just taking a walk. I wanted to spend some time here playing with Teddy, and then I was going to the mal to buy some new clothes! Mummy is letting me buy a new dress for the dance next month, Sally replied, walking around the bench to reach over and scratch behind Winstons ears, the creature responding by nuzzling into Sallys hand. She, too, was a familiar face. It was good to be surrounded by those for one as young as Winston. Albion, meanwhile, nodded. He knew what Sallys normal little game was; go and be surrounded by all the boys looking at her and in the meantime spend Mummys money because she had plenty of it. She was the more material one out of the three children. Why not? She was a girl, and girls liked looking pretty, wearing pretty clothes and generally having nice things. Albion could not fault his little sister for that. Now, propped up on his elbows, he offered her a bit more of an actual response. A look of very slight remorse crossed his face. A shame I wont be around for that dance. It wounds like a lot of fun. Oh! Really?! I was kind of hoping you could come with me, Albion. Oh, no. Besides, Im sure the boys would appreciate your older brother not hanging around to be glaring at them if they hit on my little sister, he replied, lips now curled in a mischievous grin. While he didnt always approve of the boys that Sally got herself involved with, nothing serious had ever happened, and Albion had never had to actually intervene. Her sense of judgment was, at least, sound. Sally responded by poking Albions nose., then pretending to swoon with the back of her hand on her forehead. Oh be nice. I know youd be going to meet some lovely lady whod be swept off her feet by meeting one of the last Squires of Escennia in history! Hey! No fair! My standards are at least of non-fainting-maiden quality thank you very much! Both of them suddenly burst out laughing, their raucousness carrying all across the park and turning a couple of heads. This was, to them, highly hilarious. Albion could even laugh at his own status as a squire, and that kept everything in perspective. It stopped Albion from being too serious about his job and being some uptight asshole. After all he was still young, and he was still human. He had flaws, but he didnt want to be something that couldnt live in a modern world. Many already thought knights were anachronistic enough as it was. And who didnt like laughing at their siblings silliness? Aha okay, enough of that, Sally finally managed to breathe, reaching for her little white handbag and pulling out a Pok Ball. The capture device was thrown up into the air, and from its depths, a Skitty was released. The pink and cream kitten mewled with the happiness of tasting fresh air for the first time in a while, scampering around Sallys feet and rubbing up against her ankle. This was Teddy, her rare male Skitty, which were rather hard to come by. She had originally wanted to get a female one, but had simply found only a male, and was overjoyed to do so. It suited her to have something rare, anyway, as far as she was concerned. She owned her little kitten with some glee and it reflected in the giddy happiness that Teddy had for her owner. Winston, who had been sitting on Albions chest for quite some time now, suddenly leapt off and made Albion wince underneath his steel plating. At the sight of Teddy, he was happy! It was a friend to play with! The Ponyta stood in front of Teddy and lowered his head for a few seconds, sniffing the familiar cat to make sure it was, in fact, Teddy. And it was! Teddy pawed at Winstons muzzle for a second before running off, their favourite game of run fast already ensuing as the Ponyta galloped along after the Skitty. If Winston was having fun, Albion was content, and the squire took the chance to sit up on the bench, hands behind his head as he leaned against the backrest, gazing towards the little pond in front of them. Sally took a seat beside him, instead choosing to watch the two scampering Pokmon as they chased each other to and fro all around the park. Say, Albion, Sally suddenly started, curiosity lacing her voice, you never did tell us. What do you plan on achieving on this trip of yours? That was a question he hadnt been asked yet. And it was true he hadnt thought much about it. He knew he was going somewhere, and he had only a few answers with him. He needed to answer his sister as best he could. Well of course, I need to get some experience in the world so that I can finish becoming a knight. And I was sort of hoping to find out what happened to Father along the way. The younger girl nodded. She understood that sentiment, at the very least; the death of Linton Marius had been a very trying time for them all. For them to see his body collapsed on the floor, bleeding out in the middle of his own home it had been difficult for the entire family. What was worse was that theyd never had any kind of closure. The police had turned up no real results; the weapon in the mans back hadnt come up on any searches. Whoever had done it was a consummate professional, and Albion resolved to find them. Solving a case seven years old on his own wasnt going to be an easy task. Either way, Albion, I think there might be a problem, Sally added quickly. Problem? What kind of problem? Albion responded, rather shocked. He hadnt thought of any problems. How many Pokmon do you own? Well, Winston, of course. Hes my partner. These days, big brother, everyone has a whole lot of them. Have you considered getting more Pokmon? If youre going after a real killer, you might need some more for your own protection. Sally raised a particularly valid point. After all, while a Ponyta was great, hed need more a small army of his own, as it were. Knights were very rarely men who fought alone, instead having squires and pages and peasant-soldiers at their backs to assist them in battle. Albion knew to understand that fact well and a knight was more than his horse and his armour. He needed his sword, his shield both literal and metaphorical. Perhaps obtaining more Pokmon that just Winston was a good idea it made a lot of sense to Albion, really. Yes, hed have to find himself more Pokmon to bring with him on his journey. Youre right, I guess. But where can I get more? Sally lifted a hand to her chin, thinking for a few moments. Where could one get more Pokmon around here? Then it struck her. Have you ever considered adoption, Alby? There are adoption homes you can access through Poktechopia, that new online place, that you might be able to find something from. A good idea. Its the noble thing to do. Mother and Father would approve, Albion responded slowly, dignifying the response with a nod or two of his head. Sally clapped with joy. Good! Here, give me your Poktech, Ill find you something. I do know more about Pokmon than you, Alby and yes, before you even say it, Ill find you something nice and knightly, dont worry. Hey! I resent that stereotype! Albion protested immediately. What if I wanted something, um, cute? The day you prefer form over function is the day you stop being a knight and become a fashion model, big brother. Dont give me that silliness! Ill find you something really good. Sally reached over into Albions belongings and immediately pulled out his Poktech, powering it up and choosing her way through the menus, booting up Poktechopia and delving into it for him. She was going to handle everything including the spending of his money and writing his application for the adoption house. Immediately, the red-haired young teenager spied something that fit all of the criteria that she could think of, a Horsea! It was young and in need of a good home, and she knew it evolved into a very powerful and regal Pokmon later on, a Kingdra. Albion would definitely need to have that kind of aquatic firepower on his team. After all, Sallys top priority was his safety. She filled out an application and logged out of Poktechopia, smiling broadly at her older brother a few minutes later. She had said nothing and instead stared transfixed at the screen while Albion was left to watch on dumbfounded at his little sisters broad knowledge of this topic. Okay! Ive just applied for a Horsea, Albion. Theyre a Water-type, which will contrast with Winston really well and you can use it when you go to Mayriver and the beach and that kind of thing! They become a Kingdra later on, and theyre very powerful and regal creatures. Youll like it! And um, how much is this costing me? Only two thousand Zenny! Albion was incredulous. Two thou- what?! I um, okay, I suppose. I guess it goes towards a good cause. Right! Now promise me youll love and cherish this cute little Horsea with everything you have! Sally said with some intensity, poking her finger into Albions nose and staring into his eyes. Any answer other than yes seemed to be an extremely bad idea. I of course, Sally, why would I not look after such a creature in my care? he replied, breathing slowly, to which he received no response but the intensity in her eyes. His little sister was sure scary when she wanted to be, but when it came to Pokmon, she got intensely interested, almost as much as she did about shopping. Sally thought Pokmon were cute and had learned all about the cute ones in her quest to find ones that she wanted. Under most circumstances, she would have adopted the Horsea herself! However, it was Albions turn to get a new Pokmon. She had three or four already while her poor older brother only had Winston. So it was only the fair thing to do for him, from her point of view. Sitting up, Sally rested the Poktech back in Albions lap, and then brought two fingers to her lips and whistled sharply. That was enough to bring both the Skitty and the Ponyta sprinting back to their trainers, panting with joy and exhaustion. Theyd both been running around the park like crazy and it was about time for a scenery change. Okay! Lets all go walk into the city square. First we need to stop by the Pokmon Center. Hopefully by the time we get there, theyll have processed your application and well have an answer! And then you can take me clothes shopping and tell me how pretty I look, Albion. Winston and Teddy can come too! she said with considerable exuberance, clapping her hands halfway through at her sudden clothes revelation. Yes, this was a great day for Sally and Albion was now being dragged along on her little escapade. The squire rose, checked for Winstons saddlebags and stuffed the Poktech back in, fitting the mount with his light load. Winston was growing accustomed to carrying it, and Albion was already looking to invest in a bag to lighten the load on his partner. For now, this was the only solution. He looked to his sister with a smile on his face. Seeing her smile used to be the only true joy in his life. That fact had not changed. Okay, lets go. The two humans and two Pokmon walked side-by-side, Sallys arm looped through Albions and nigh on skipping down the street. Teddy and Winston chattered away like old friends, talking about grass and trees and the inconsequential little things theyd come along as theyd played in the park. Albion was simply content; this was really the last chance hed get to spend with his little sister for a long time. It was best to cherish a moment like this, to make sure she was as happy as he could make her. Hed miss her, after all. Edited by Kirin, Sep 27 2010, 10:24 PM.
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![]() ![]() LP: 70 | 0.5 ![]() Albion LP: 144 Modding LP: 12 | |
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| Kirin | Sep 27 2010, 10:22 PM Post #2 |
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Kirin the Bloodedge
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As the group walked through the hustle and bustle of the streets of Escennia, things changed. The silence and sanctity of the park became a loud, busy metropolis of human activity. Cars drove past, and even the occasional horse-drawn carriage, creating a cacophonous sound on top of the milieu of people chatting, haggling and generally announcing their presence throughout Escennia. People dressed in all manner of colours in all manner of stylish clothes. Once more, the city breathed its own life, the hubbub of a busy markets day indeed proving itself as a powerful attractor for all the peoples that lived within the city walls. People wandered the main streets of Escennia, purchasing goods trinkets, clothing, antiques, whatever it was that caught their eye. Food, living essentials this was one of the times that the people of the city came out in full force in order to make good some purchases at bargain prices. Maybe sample some new food, meet up with friends and go on a shopping spree, whatever they fancied. Albion, Sally, Winston and Teddy did not go straight to the markets. Instead, they headed for the citys local Pokmon Center, where they could check on the status of messages, look further into this adoption that Sally had made for Albion, and generally just unwind where there werent so many people around. It was, for all of them, a far better option. The crowds were so densely packed that moving was almost impossible. Why not be off the streets, get a snack or two from the Trainers Lounge, and kick back after meeting a new ally? It seemed like a great plan. The brother and sister duo walked through the sliding automatic glass doors first, followed hot on their heels by their Pokmon. Albion didnt waste any time and headed to the bank of the computers in the corner, sitting at one of the chairs and logging in to his storage information. Sally watched over his shoulder while Albion interfaced with the computer, because well, Albion had no idea how to use the infernal machine. It says you have a message in the top right, Albion! You might want to check it! Sally said, squealing with a bit of over-excitement at the prospect of getting to hug a Horsea. Albion just sighed. I can see it, Sally, hold on. Even he knew he wasnt the best with technology, and spent a little time looking at the interface and trying to identify basic things. Maybe it was better that Sally did all this for him but if he had to learn, now was a good time. He clicked on the message; it was from the adoption house, as his sister had expected and it brought only good news. Of course, Sally was already reading it aloud and, as a result, practically climbing over Albion to get her hands on the mouse in order to pull the Horsea out of the PC. Hooray! Adoption accepted! Now get the Horsea out, silly brother! she said, grabbing for the mouse and scrolling back for him. It was a strange feeling to have his little sister dominating his actions even at this age, but nonetheless it was useful to have her around in order to get some help doing this. Of course she seemed a little more eager for this than he did, but still Albion was, quietly, looking forward to another team member. It meant another friend, another ally. It was someone that Winston could relate to better than he could to a human. These things were all important in the long run for Albions quest to become a knight; knighthood was not just about being able to swing a sword around and fight. It was about bringing people hope, and in this world, hope was important, as was the bond between people and Pokmon a topic that Albion was very quickly coming to appreciate. The mouse moved back to the Pokmon storage system for Opaddeka. All Trainers used this system, storing their individual Pokmon and withdrawing them when they required them, either when their services simply werent needed or when they were carrying more than six, as was custom. Up until now, Albion had had no use for it, or predicted no real use for himself, but this was far removed from what hed expected to be doing. Already in a single day his expectations had been shattered, so why not break them a little further? He clicked on the button to access the storage, and there it was: his new Horsea. It was a female, so said the system, and he withdrew it from the PC. From a slot on the side, a Pok Ball popped out and Albion reached for it, holding it in his hands for a moment before pressing the button on the front and allowing the Horsea to appear and it began in Sallys arms with a squeal. Actually, there were two simultaneous squeals: one from the human, one from the little critter who was getting a hug and liked it. The critter looked up, staring around this place with its plush carpeting and strange people it had never seen before and, well the fact she was in the arms of a weird human that she had never seen before with a red mane was something that the Horsea found un-nerving to begin with. The attention from these people was nice, though! She was already getting a hug. The little thing looked up into Sallys eyes confusedly with its own large ones. Was this her new trainer? And what was that weird guy with the big metal shell was he a new kind of Pokmon? But he looked so human Shes so cute! Sally practically squealed, trying her very best not to crush the Horsea in her grip. The cuteness was almost too much to bear for the young lady, thinking these little creatures were so amazing. And when they evolved they went from cute to cool. Which would be good for Albion! Hi there, little one, Albion said soothingly, drawing on the voice hed used to calm Sallys frazzled nerves when she was younger, even going so far to scratch underneath the little creatures snout. Or whatever it was. Im Albion, and this is my little sister Sally. Im your new trainer. The Horsea looked right into Albions blue ones, curiosity etched all over her face. This human was a very peculiar being, wearing all that metal! What was he? Was he some kind of Aggron wannabe? Maybe! She tooted once, and the girl holding her squealed with glee as she did so. The Horsea could have definitely gotten used to all those hugs. Albion, she needs a name! Sally said suddenly, practically bouncing on the balls of her feet with the cuteness overload she was experiencing. Indeed, Sally was an energetic young girl whose reservoir of pep could not run out. What about Catriona, after Grandmother? She was so much fun! Albion paused for a moment. Their grandmother, Lady Leona Catriona Marius, had been their fathers mother. While she had passed away only very recentlya sad fact that she had passed after her sonshe had been the fun grandmother for them, spoiling them, letting the children make cookies and cakes with her, and proving that her excellent eye for baking had been more keen than any other in Escennia. Maybe a little tribute to her memory wouldnt go astray. Besides, it had been Sallys idea to do this in the first place; why not trust her judgement now? Okay, Ill go with that. How about it, girl? Do you like the sound of Catriona? The Horsea tooted its approval with some glee. It sounded like a pretty name, and she liked to feel pretty. She liked the feel of Catriona! Shed have to get used to it, of course, but that all came with time. Then its decided. Welcome aboard, Catriona. Let me introduce to you some friends, Albion said with a warm smile, then clapped his hands together a few times. Both Winston and Teddy came scurrying over to the two humans and the newly obtained Pokmon, the two male critters trying to get a better look at their new friend. Catriona looked at them, and my, oh my, what did we have here? These were two strapping young men who were both particularly attractive members of their respective species, right in front of her eyes. Suddenly, the Horsea wriggled out of Sallys grip to bounce in front of the Skitty and Ponyta, curling her tail up and blinking her eyes quickly. Sallyd done that herself so many timesof course, not using a tailshe knew instantly what was happening. Albion, in the meantime, took a few seconds to cotton on to what was happening, but when he did realise, he was shocked. Catriona was flirting with Teddy and Winston both at the same time! Winston and Teddy were both bemused by the Horseas actions for sure, neither of them quite realising it just yet. They were just happy to have a new friend! Winston was neighing and stamping and Teddy was running around in a couple of circles, chasing his tail. They werent responding instantly to her flirting; both of them were still reasonably young and didnt see it quite in those terms immediately. In this place, there were two happy Pokmon, who were looking for friends and a young lady, who was looking for a bit of love. It didnt quite fit that way. This is Winston, and thats Teddy, Albion told Catriona, waving his hand at the respective Pokmon as he spoke. He wanted to defuse the situation before it got any worse, but that wasnt going to be happening any time soon; Catriona was practically rubbing herself up against Teddy at this point, who was purring and responding. Teddy now understood exactly what was going on and well, he liked it. What guy wouldnt like a girl coming up to him and being interested? For now, Sally and Albion left well enough alone, because Teddy was smart enough to look after himself. Albion did have a plan to interrupt if things were getting a little well, risqu. Hed never seen Pokmon do anything like that before, nor did he want to. Hopefully Teddy had the smarts to resist her charms! After all, how compatible was a seahorse and a cat, in the end? It seemed like a very strange pairing to Albion. Oh Celebi was she trying to kiss Teddy? This simply would not do. Albion reached into his belongings and pulled out some Pokmon food, shaking the box it came in. Its time to eat, everyone! Youre going to need your strength on the road. He handed out one of the baked treats to each of the Pokmon, hoping to use it as both a method of endearment and a way of temporarily getting Catriona off Teddys case. Albion looked to Sally with a partly concealed worried look, and she just stared at him for a few moments. If he couldnt handle this now, how would he deal with it later? It was, perhaps, something to address at a later time. Surely he had something in mind. Albion, in fact, did have something in mind: make good friends with the little Horsea and get her to trust him. Maybe then he could help her along later to be a little less um, randy. That was a good way of putting it. While Albion did not want to consider Catriona as having a problem, per se, he was going to need her at the top of her game when he required her services, and that was all he asked for. In return hed provide for her worldly needs and be a friend to the little creature. That was how this worked, right? It had worked so far with Winston. First, however, he recalled something Sally had earlier told him about Catriona; she was a Water-type. Shed obviously thrive better in water, which was a natural habitat for her. His eyes gazed around to see if there was anything he could do to that extent, and yes, there was; one open-topped tank full of water where one could place some small Water-types and let them relax in the Pokmon Center, too. Albion was indeed counting his blessings if, of course, this worked. Once Catriona was finished with her Pok-snack, Albion gently lifted the Horsea up and walked her over to the tank of water, placing her into the cooling water. The Horsea responded by splashing around happily; water! Water was its home turf and it was definitely the preferred place to be. She tooted happily at Albion, currently extremely glad for the treatment of snack time and then water time. Catriona was currently seeing Albion as a nice human, and that was definitely a bonus for the squire. He wanted to make friends, after all. Both Sally and Albion were beside the tank now, wearing near-identical smiles on their lips. Siblings had to have their moments of synchronicity, after all, and Catriona found their similarity silly. So, Catriona, let me tell you about what were going to do, Albion started, Sally shooting her brother a sidelong gaze. Even she wanted to hear this; her brothers motivation was important. Im going to be going on a bit of a journey to find out just what being a knight means. You and Winston are my partners on this journey, so were going to go see far-off fantastic places and meet all kinds of people and Pokmon. And of course along the way well have all kinds of fun adventures and things. How does that sound? By the response of tooting and happiness, Catriona did not seem to have a problem. Maybe there were lots of cute boys she could meet on the way. Thatd be great, after all! She liked boys; they were fun and they were usually nice to her after she buttered them up a little. And who didnt like attention? Maybe even this human could be buttered up, even if anything past getting him to do things for her like get her food was a disgusting thought and completely out of the question. Still, whatever worked! She tooted again, still happy, splashing a little bit of water in his face as a sign of saying yes, this will be awesome. Albion recoiled at the water in his face, but was still smiling anyway. He hadnt expected that; she was a playful little thing, obviously, and she liked having fun, and apparently in more than one sense of the word. Right then. Problem solved Catriona seemed interested in what was to come ahead, and Winston was already aboard. That constituted everyone that Albion was bringing on his journey, and even Sally didnt seem to mind the explanation. How much of it was just exposition to get the Horsea to like it and how much of it was true, she didnt know, but in his own weird way Albion probably wasnt lying. He did have a habit for getting into weird and wacky situations that made no sense. I know! Why dont we take these three and go buy those clothes! Itll give Catriona a chance to see Escennia and what it is you do! Albion nodded. An excellent idea. Ready to go, everyone? The Skitty, the Ponyta and the Horsea all sounded individual joyous assent, and with that, it was decided. The girl scooped up the little blue Horsea out of the tank to place her in Albions arms, and smiled. Finally, a chance to go and buy that dress shed been waiting all day for. Lets go! With that, the group of now five walked right out of the Pokmon Centre, ready to head out into the milling throng of people outside and participating in the market day that Escennia was currently holding. There were people everywhere, as one might expect; people in all manner of garb buying all manner of objects. Sally knew exactly what she was looking for, fortunately, which let her cut through the throng of people and go back to the dress shop shed seen on the way through the city. Even the regular stores were having outdoor sales that day, everything held up on proper racks and arrayed beautifully for the shoppers to purchase. Everyone made more money on market day; all the goods were laid in front of the shoppers clearly for them to buy, and there was no chance of a cloud in the sky. Coupled with the amazing bargains that were usually made, this kind of day was generally the one that every business owner looked forward to. Everyone won. Sally was looking for a dress for the dance coming up. Under most circumstances she would have ordered it earlier, but knowing there was a market day coming up, how could she resist the discounts at the sale? It was smart shopping, something she prided herself on. After all, she was spending mummys money, not hers. If she was irresponsible with it, then she was in trouble. The group wandered up to the towns usual dressmaker, who tended to do a very good job. Sally was looking for something to compliment her dark red hair, something that looked nice and wasnt too expensive. That way she wouldnt get in any strife and that, as she knew rather well, was a place she did not want to go. Once they arrived at the dress shop, Albion took a moment to gaze around the streets. They were still bustling with far too many people than normal; it was hard for cars or horses to get around. Of course, he wasnt complaining, because it meant he got to walk, which, after riding horseback at full speed across the grasslands, was what he preferred. The squire was now simply here to help Sally pick her dress out, bid her one final farewell, and then head off to wherever it was his adventure, and his duties with the military, took him. Why would he be interested in looking at dresses, after all? This wasnt his scene. He was just there because his sister had asked him to. Albion didnt have much patience or fortitude for this kind of duty. Hey, Albion! What do you think of this one? Sally asked suddenly, holding a spaghetti-strap dress over her body to show it to her brother. It was a little red thing thatwhilst barely modestdid indeed match her hair well. It looked nice. Youll turn plenty of heads with that. It looks good, though. Ill get this one, then. Thanks! Albion offered her a smile, and then turned back to the three little critters that were playing around. Catriona was still with Sally, being the idea that girls did girly stuff, while Winston and Teddy were with Albion, occasionally poking and prodding one another and laughing like silly little kids. Which, really, they were, but that was a fact Albion didnt mind. As long as they stayed close by and didnt run off, it wasnt a problem. Sally paid for her dress and asked the lady to have it delivered later since she had a whole bunch of other places to go, which she paid a little extra for. However, itd be worth it. With a huge smile on her face, Sally returned to Albions side, completely content with her purchase. She already had some nice shoes to go with it and everything. Shopping complete, she could now return home and enjoy the rest of the day doing whatever else it was she was looking for. Or, better yet, not go home and spend some more of mummys money. That was, unfortunately, the better plan. Say, lets get some lunch. We can go to that place down on the corner of Dawne Avenue, it should be pretty quiet today. Albion considered a moment. With so many people out here, the little quiet out of the way lunch joints would be a great idea right about now. Nice and quiet, have one last meal before heading out this afternoon over to well, wherever it was he intended to go. At this point, he still wasnt sure. His journey would take him wherever it needed to, he had always thought; there had not been much to it other than the simple wandering the land, much as a knight-errant, but there had been just a little hesitance in that thought. Perhaps a meal to soothe his thoughts was a good idea. Sure. Lets go. Teddy, Winston, cmon, were going to have lunch. Lunch was certainly enough to get the attention of the two males, who immediately followed behind the armour-clad squire. First, their snack from before, and now maybe a chance to get more food! Who didnt like food? Obediently, the two Pokmon followed behind their trainers, all five of them wandering down the streets again while they looked around, savouring the scents and tastes that Escennia displayed in all its regal finery. For Albion, it would be his last time to take it all in without the worries of the world on his shoulders. It was a last farewell for a man who needed to learn about the world outside the city gates. As they walked, they were each thinking totally different things. Albion was contemplating his next move, wondering just where he should head off. Perhaps he could head east, towards the distant island home of Slumber City and Deepwood Town, across the guarded Icicle Island that he could now take the time to explore and savour? Or what about south, towards Hillmoss and Rose? Better yet, west, towards the bustling metropolis that all trainers usually ended up visiting called Brightopolis. His mind was swimming with possibilities, and every step he took, Albion sank further into that. Sally was considering the consequences of her only other brother leaving. She had relied on Albion for so long that she was now forced to stand on her own two feet; the Marius household would, other than the butlers and servants, now be an all-female lodging, composed of herself and her mother Renata. It was going to be a difficult thing to get used to; Albion had been the proverbial man of the house for a while now. While in some respects it would be good to have that little more freedom, Sally had always felt safer with Albion around. Who wouldnt? He was the legacy to their fathers name, a father thatshe remembered rather vividlyhad been killed in their own home. How could one feel safe without someone to hold on to after that kind of experience? Albion was the shield to her fair maiden. She would, without a doubt, miss him. Of the Pokmon three, each were thinking differently, too. Catriona was staring down at Teddy and Winston as they walked, effectively checking them out but unable to do a thing from the careful embrace of the red-haired lass carrying her. She was enjoying the new humans and what they were doing for her; they were being really nice to her and she loved the attention. Catriona just couldnt wait to get out of this city and see more of the world! Winstons thoughts were alternately about food and all the fun times he could have running out on the grasslands that surrounded the city. He was not a complex creature, and lived simply. He lived for the moment and for the fun he could possibly have. Life was meant to be fun! Anything that he got to do with Albion, who understood the Ponyta well, was fun. Teddy, finally, was also considering his meal, but also the Horsea up in his trainers arms. What did she want? Did she like him? There was so much confusion for the Skitty, because they were worlds apart. Both of the humans walked with their heads hung, thinking at a million miles a minute. Their thoughts went undisturbed, all of them walking in relative silence; what was there to say? They were thinking about something along similar lines. Both of them would miss the other, but they just couldnt express it properly now. The time didnt seem right to say anything about a heartfelt farewell. What kind of mood-ruiner would that be, even if their thoughts seemed to cast a pallor over the setting anyway? It was almost depressing for the both of them to be thinking in such dark places, but it would mean loneliness of a kind that neither of them had experienced in their lives before. Times changed and so did people. And were they paying any more attention to the world outside their thoughts, they would have heard the loud explosion from a few metres behind them. The window of a bookstore suddenly shattered outwards in a massive fireball, the books inside incinerating as glass shards shot out from the concussive fireball. Half of the building seemed to fly apart as the blast travelled its way through the streets of the city. Screams rose from the people who had been nearby, and the smoke that billowed from the open wound of the building served as a warning sign: trouble. Albion immediately turned around and scooped Sally into his arms, holding her and Catriona close, using his body as a shield while he ducked and brought them into a low crouch. If anyone here were to get hurt from the explosion, it would be himself, as the one wearing the knightly armour. Shards of glass, of flying masonry from the building, slammed into the plates that covered his body, head crouched and hung to help keep the debris from hitting him and knocking him out. Now he would have to live up to his name, but by the sacred names of Lugia, why now? And, more importantly, why here? Sally, we need to find somewhere safe. Now, Albion intoned steadfastly, trying to stay cool and collected despite the situation. As a member of the Opaddeka Military Establishment and being on-scene, as well as a member of the Escennian Knighthood, it would no doubt fall to him to handle the situation alongside the local police force. He had to live up to the reputation that he wished to build for himself. Now was the time to do it. O-okay Sally managed to utter, body trembling. This was scary. This was the kind of thing that only ever happened on TV, not in real life. This was the kind of thing that the cops were meant to deal with before it happened! All those police shows on TV had made her particularly insular about this sort of thing. Now, she was pale, scared, and shaking. Even the three Pokmon were currently huddled in close. Albion was to be their rock. Slowly, he stood up and surveyed the situation. The smoke that was billowing form the building was thick and black, causing mass concealment. People were screaming in terror as they fled the scene, unsure of how to handle it. Only the bravest of souls were hanging around the explosions epicentre, clamouring to get a better look at what had just transpired. None were entirely sure what had just happened but, slowly, the police were making their way on-scene. None were expecting the sudden mass of black-clad bodies to pour out of the bookstore, either, brandishing weapons and Pok Balls alike, dominating the street that they were filling with their mass of humanity while the smoke thickened thanks to the use of Pokmon. As they poured out, they began to assault the common people, attacking with weaponry and their follower creatures, the police rushing to get to the scene before too many people got hurt. Only a few of the officers could make it to the site of the crime before the mob brawl began to spill out onto the streets, the instigators all dressed identically with the outline of a stylised U in white on the left side of their black button-up coats. They attacked with staves and knives equally, all simple weapons one could easily purchase from most shops around the place if one knew where to look. And the Pokmon they had with them were all of the shadowy sort. Sneasels, Weaviles, Spiritombs, Gastlys, Haunters, Gengars; the ghosts and beings of shadow that hid well and could cause chaos and confusion in any mob. Now, they were attacking the common populace in a brazen act that not even Team Rocket had ever dared do. Who were these people? Sally, go hide in the nearest alleyway, Albion said resolutely as he rose, unsheathing the sword that lay on his left hip. He had not once had to draw the blade in self-defence, but this wasnt some kind of training exercise. This was real, and now he had to fight. If these people were attacking the commonfolk, then he would fight for them. The squire would stop them by any means necessary. Sally, however, had other ideas. N-no Albion, I want to stay with you where its safe, she breathed, still shaking, but her eyes poke of a tired courage that asked only one thing: the shelter of her brothers protection. This was a dangerous place, and the safest spot for her would be close by the one doing the fighting, or so she thought. My jobs dangerous and I have to stop these people, Albion said, unsure. He didnt want his little sister anywhere near this battlefield. He had already lost his father; losing his sister to this mob would be an unthinkable shameful crime that would hang forever on his psyche. But I dont want to be left behind! I want to stay with you! It was an irrational way of thinking by one under much stress, but he understood. He knew what the symbolism of being by the side of a loved one meant. Naturally, he didnt want her doing this, but if she was going to be stubborn well. There was sadly little Albion could do about it, and by nature, he had to cave in. Okay, fine, just just be careful, okay? Winston! Catriona! With me! he said, carefully prying Catriona out of Sallys grasp. He was going to need both of their talents for the upcoming battle, because theyd be fighting their way through a heavy mob. With Catriona in his left arm, his sword in his right hand, and Winston at his side, he seemed ready. If Winston were a Rapidash, he would be fighting this battle atop his mount, and fighting a furious battle. This one was for all the people of Escennia. Albion dashed forward, intent on stopping the nearest combatant wielding a knife. This one was looming over a man who had a stab wound in his right shoulder, and with the blood dripping off the knife Albion knew exactly what was going on here. Launching his steel-plated foot into the attackers spine, the man went stumbling forward, only for the squire to follow up with the flat of his blade to the top of the mans head, sending him crashing to the ground unconscious under the massive concussive force. It was a brutal way to be fighting, but there was no forgiveness for those who preyed on the innocent. Sally was almost horrified, watching her brother fighting like this, but it was his job, right? Beating up the bad guys? He had no choice, right? It wasnt like he was attacking people for no reason. These people were hurting others and Albion had to stop them. But this was a side of him that Sally had never seen before. The look on Albions face was all serious, totally collected, and all business. There was intensity in his eyes like shed never seen before. Even Sally had to stay a few steps away being too close was obviously going to be a danger in this brutal game. The police were rushing on-scene as quickly as they could now, their Pokmon leaping from their capsule storage devices. The trusty standby creatures of the Opadekka Region Police Department could be seen in great numbers. Hordes of Growlithes, Magnemites and Kecleons, the basic starter-type Pokmon of the all-but-defunct police force, were running around to try and stop the Pokmon unleashed on this city, as well as the attackers. Albion nodded his head to the police as they ran past, knowing that theyd be the mainstay of this fight. For the most part, he would be there to assist them if they asked. He did not, however, expect to have to fight for his life suddenly when an attacker wielding a long dagger leapt from a rooftop to his right straight at him, wearing the most deranged expression he had ever seen, and the most insane get-up ever. The man collided straight into Albions chest, sending them both sprawling to the ground; Catriona went flying out of his grip, only to be caught by the combined efforts of Winston, Sally and Teddy to pick her out of the air. Albion smashed the back of his head against the concrete kerb, blurring his vision as he struggled to raise his knees up to launch this guy from atop him. The crazy man raised his knife, and Albion took the chance to get a look at the face of his assailant as he blinked his eyes, trying to get some focus back. This man of wiry build had medium-length shaggy black hair, with the left side of his face concealed by the broken facemask of a Houndour. Riding upon his left wrist was the spinal bone decoration all Houndours had, and the jacket that was the same as those that had assailed the rest of the townsfolk was torn and tattered. Across his body from his right shoulder was a chain that seemed to hold some sort of carrying receptacle that Albion couldnt make out. The look on this mans face was that of a crazed killer that had finally caught up to the hard-to-find prey hed been searching for. Albions right arm was trapping this mans left hand, which carried the knife, its blade pointed directly at the blondes face. Albion finally found his left hand free and struck the guy in the face with a balled fist, sending him recoiling back off him with a broken and bleeding nose. Albion leapt to his feet, sword now held high in both hands, ready to well, what was he going to do? Cut this guys arm off? Surely not slice his head off. Slowly, Albion circled around while the three Pokmon rushed to his side. Sally was moving back, pressing her back up against the wall of a buildings shopfront so as to avoid someone attacking her from behind. Winston was standing gallantly at Albions side, while Teddy was next to his friend and Catriona was sitting atop Teddys back. It was the safest way for her to operate on land. Albion! Be careful! Sally called suddenly, to which Albion responded only by gripping his sword tighter. The man smirked and gave a little chuckle, pulling from the carrying thing riding on his left hip three Pok Balls. Throwing them all up into the air, they exploded in a flash of light to reveal three creatures. The first was a Bagon, who roared its draconic prowess upon landing on the ground. The second was a small Gible, who stomped around a little and then joined its larger partner in roaring. Finally, the third creature was a Swablu, which stared right at Albion and Sally, the pair of them staring back at the airy creature. Around its neck was a small collar made of some kind of black metal. The Swablu, in a strange twist of fate, dived straight for Sally and Albion, its trainer staring at it in disbelief. He had in all honesty almost expected this to happen, but not quite so suddenly. Sally, who was staring rather intently at the Swablu, suddenly looked at the thing on the mans hip and flushed pale completely at the stark realisation at what it was. It was a human skull. To make matters worse, it had the twisted, grotesque face that was once applied to it stretched over the front. At the look of that face, however, Sally screamed in absolute terror and pointed, screaming the name of her knightly brother over and over again with no stop, suddenly coming to tears and breaking down on the ground. Albion had to look, to see what had Sally all worked up and his reaction was just the same to start with. The young mans face lost all colour, and his body started to tremble. It was the face of their older brother Damien. Edited by Kirin, Sep 27 2010, 10:27 PM.
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![]() ![]() LP: 70 | 0.5 ![]() Albion LP: 144 Modding LP: 12 | |
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| Kirin | Sep 27 2010, 10:23 PM Post #3 |
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Kirin the Bloodedge
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Both of them remained stunned, watching the tormented face of their fallen sibling. Damien had owned two Pokmon, a Houndour and a Swablu. That Houndour was now providing bodily decoration for this killers body and the Swablu was obviously now the property of the man who had slaughtered their brother. Finally realised it, have you, children? the man said, his voice dripping with acidic contempt for the two human beings in front of him. He did not like them, it seemed and nor did he like the Swablu, for he raised a small remote control and administered a large shock through the collar, bringing the creature back to his side. That this is what is slowly becoming of your family, one by one? This man was cruel, violent and sadistic. It was clear that he loved to inflict pain and kill his foes in slow, torturous manners and, obviously, his foes extended to both human and Pokmon alike. With the remains of both a man and a creature adorning his body, even going so far as to keep Pok Balls inside a human skull, this man was beyond any kind of redemption. He was the twisted murderer that killed their brother Damien, who had been nothing more than a treasure hunter. Last Albion had known, Damien was on the search for Mew and the stories of bad luck cursing those who failed in that quest were well, true, it seemed. His brother had run across these foul killers. Who were they? I dont know who you are, you asshole Sally stopped, hearing the powerful growl in Albions voice. She had never heard her brother speak like this before; he never swore. This was the first time in sixteen years she had ever heard him like this. She was, however, too shocked to do anything about it, the tears rolling down her cheeks as she watched the battle unfold in front of her. But I will kill you for what youve done. The same way I killed your brother? Or your father, for that matter? Albion paused for just a moment. So this was the man that had killed his father, too? Did he have some kind of vendetta against the Marius family, for he was already hunting down the children? Whatever it was Albion was no longer willing to listen to this person. The words coming out of his mouth were no longer like him, but this was different. Here he was now, faced with the person who had taken not one, but two family members away from him, and had already tried to take his life. This man deserved punishment beyond anything Albion could give him. However, before Albion could respond, the man laughed and pointed straight for the squire. Get him, he intoned with a cackle, then raised his knife, ready to proceed after his minions. The brawl around them was raging furiously, the battle taking the streets up completely. This was but one fight in many but this was the most deadly one of all. The three assailing Pokmon lunged forward, but a quick dash in by Teddy and Winston intercepted them, Catriona immediately spewing a thick black haze in the area while Albion moved around it. That would give Albion and Sallys Pokmon a chance to hold off the other Pokmon in the confusion of the smokescreen, which was a valuable thing that Albion was extremely thankful for, because he really didnt need the added distraction. It would just be him and this assassin, one on one. Only one of them was going to walk away from this, and it would be him. This man needed to answer for his crimes. Albion sidestepped the smokescreen, still holding his sword high above his head, ready to bring it crashing down on this man who had caused so much havoc. The assassin grinned and ran forward, dagger held in a reverse grip in his left handobviously, a left-handed man from the way he was holding his blade so dextrously. Albion took his chance to bring his sword straight down at the mans head, but he lifted his lead leg and leaned out of the swords path, lunging forward while Albions blade was still on the downswing. The blade clanged off steel chest plate, Albion thankful that he was wearing the heavy battle armour for once in his life. It was protecting him now, a protection this man was not afforded. The sword came up, rising in a violent slash, but again to no avail; this assassin seemed to move like a dancer through the field of battle, light on his feet and ready to kill at a moments notice. Albions psyche barely registered the screams of anguish and pain from within the smokescreen as he concentrated on his foe. In the meantime, Sally was still huddled up in a ball at the front of a building; a police officer saw her in her condition and, as he approached, Sally could barely look up as the tears streamed down her cheeks. The officer laid a reassuring hand on her shoulder. Miss, would you please follow me? he asked. No, I my brother Sally weakly managed, raising her shaky right arm to point at the armour-clad squire that was battling the assassin in deadly combat. Its not safe here. And Teddy too hes in there. The policeman shook his head and knelt by the young lady that could do nothing more than watch on in horror while her brother fought off the demon that had been plaguing her nightmares for four years. Inside the smokescreen, the screeches of Pokmon engaged in a furious brawl could be heard; pain and anger mixed as one while the battle continued in earnest. This was not the usual kind of fight where one would perhaps perform some special attack and use some other technique to assist it and play nice based on some kind of arbitrary rules. No, this was different. This was a smash-and-tear battle. Claws, teeth, and hooves it was more like humans wrestling than any kind of regular boxing match that they entertained. This wasnt how a Pokmon otherwise fought. This was down and dirty grappling, rolling on the asphalt, trying desperately to break one another in a furious cavalcade of destruction. Whoever walked away from this lived. Winston was currently fighting off the Bagon, who was trying desperately to gouge the Ponytas eyes out with its paws. Teddy was locked in a wrestle with the Gible, rolling on the ground, one trying to pin the other before attacking with furious swipes of their claws to make the other bleed out. And, as Catriona and the Swablu didnt know each other, they were fighting each other, the Swablu avoiding the high-pressure water blasts aimed at knocking the airy creature out of the sky. Rough and tumble combat was enough for these creatures who had the honour of their trainers to consider. They understood the story; this man and his Pokmon were the villains. And they, those who styled themselves as heroes, were duty-bound to stop them. Their fight continued in the most vicious manner they could possibly muster. Albion could no longer hold back his urge to get into this fight. His sword stabbed forward in a rapid lunge, which the assassin sidestepped deftly. Almost twirling around the sword, the dagger sang out for Albions face, which was only stopped by the squire raising his right elbow into the attackers left arm and knocking it flying up. The squire followed up with a shoulder-barge, at which the assassin latched onto Albions shoulders like he was going in for a grappling clinch and pulling the swore down to the ground, knife thrown to the ground to be picked up later. Albion did the same, tossing his sword down. In the ground it was just a matter of who could get the best hits in, and a long weapon was useless at this kind of distance. The two men rolled along the pavement for a short distance before the assassin found himself on top, grinning and laughing like the madman he was before laying fist after fist into Albions face, the squire protecting his face with his steel-plated forearms for a moment before cocking one back and launching it square into his sternum. Neither of them were trained grapplers, but Albion knew a chance when he saw one. The man was rearing back in pain, and Albion lunged one arm up, locking his arm onto the mans neck and pulling him closer. The assassin struggled for a moment with two hands around his neck, but Albion did not relent and pulled him closer, locking his right bicep around his neck from behind to shut off air through his trachea. The man flailed around for a moment, trying to locate his dagger on the ground, but instead resorted to smashing his knuckles straight into Albions nose, which broke, just as the assassins nose had broken earlier, which also loosed Albions crushing grip on his neck. Now they were even, but the man found that, in Albion Marius, he had met a match. If he had taken any more of that punishment, he wouldnt have been able to continue. Heavy breaths followed to suck the air back into his lungs and he pushed off the young man, springing up and collecting his curved long knife from the ground. Finally, back to where he was safe. Albion followed suit and collected his sword off the ground, blood dripping down his face and rage written all over the features of his face that werent distorted by injury. The sting of sweat rolling into his eyes was starting to blind him, but he could not show a sign of weakness around his foe. All this work was difficult. It was hard fighting an opponent in full armour, with a sword, and extremely tiring to do so. However, the assassin lowered his blade and pulled the three Pok Balls out of Damiens skull, raising them high. Remember the name Akasha Vorlent, child just like your brother and father before you youre next. The assassin smirked one last time, and then he was gone in a cloud of smoke from some kind of smoke ball. Just like that, it was over. The assassin had been put in a lot of pain and, evidently, their fight was getting neither of them anywhere. The smokescreen that Catriona had thrown up was already dissipating, and under it was revealed three Pokmon in absolutely critical condition. Albion wanted to scream and shout in anger, but he couldnt afford it at that point; using his two Pok Balls he recalled Winston and Catriona, sheathed his sword and scooped Teddy up in his arms to go back to Sallys side. He knelt beside his younger sister, bloody, bruised, battered and exhausted, but unwilling to give up. She was scared, trembling, and being comforted by the police officer in the aftermath of watching that, but even so she reached out to collect her poor Teddy and pet the barely-breathing creature on the head. He was her pet, and she had let him fight that battle with his friends and look what happened. A sudden cry of Albion! and she was in the arms of her bigger brother, sobbing uncontrollably, body wracked with trembles like hed never seen from her before. The unbelievable stress of just that little incident caught up with her, and with the deepest of regrets on his mind, Albion closed his arms around his dearest little sister, and allowed her to weep for the brother and father that they had lost. Only one thought remained on Albions mind. Upon the bones of my brother, I swear vengeance, Akasha Vorlent. Around them, the battle was dying to a halt. Most of the men wearing black had escaped as Akasha had, but a few of them had been detained only two or three of them. The rest of the mob had fled the scene of their crime, and the insurmountable collateral damage assessed. Aside from the bookshop that theyd blown to pieces, a number of stores had their windows broken, their goods damaged, and, of course, there were a lot of people that theyd hurt. Fifteen innocent people had died in the attack, with twenty-six more casualties rushed off to hospital after medics had administered triage on them. What was supposed to be a happy day for the people of Escennia was now a nightmare from the darkest depths. The heavens overhead seemed to agree, with the sun concealed behind the grey gloom of an overcast sky. It was a time for mourning and memorial. And, for one young man, it was a chance to repay a debt that had been long overdue. Now he knew the face of the enemy, and that enemy would pay in blood. The Pokmon Centre was full of casualties and the staff members and nurses present were working overtime to keep up with the sheer number of injuries. The medics there to treat people after the attack had established the Pokmon Centres Trainer Lounge as a place to treat the injuries that required immediate looking after, running triage and first aid as best they could. Those who were treated for shock were given hot chocolate and a blanket as a chance to recover from the mental trauma that had been the street brawl. Sally had been taken there and, carefully nestled under a blanket, Albion sat by her side. He wanted to take her home and stay with her so badly, but unfortunately he had so much more he needed to do. Immediately the thought of writing up a report on the incident for the General of the Opaddeka Military Establishment came to mind, knowing that he would want to know exactly what had happened in the city as best as Albion could explain. He also had the feeling he would need to track down these men and their strange U logo. Albions arm remained wrapped around his younger sisters shoulders, keeping her nestled against him as she sipped gingerly at her hot chocolate. He had to be comforting and look after her after all that emotional distress. Their Pokmon were both being tended to, and all they could do now was wait for them to come back. Albion, Sally croaked, her throat raw and scratchy as she spoke. She wasnt feeling particularly good; her cheeks were pale, she was scared, and she very strongly wanted to go and be sick in the nearest toilet. However, even she knew she had to try to be strong. What will you do about that man? Albion contemplated his answer for a few moments, carefully working his response out in his mind. There were so many things he wanted to do. The immediate answer was tear his freaking head off and display it for the world to see, the way hed done to his family. However, as a squire, a member of the nobility, and a soldier, his answer had to be different. I will find him. Him and the men wearing black. And then I will let him answer to law and justice for what hes done. It was all he had. It sounded lame, even to him, but it was all he had. All he could afford. Could he let himself sink into vengeance? No, he could not. He had new foes, a new enemy, and a threat to his life that he could no longer ignore. Something had to be done about them. So where will you go from here? she asked of him, staring up into the bruised face of her older brother. Albion could only shake his head. I dont know, Sally. I just dont know. All he knew was that he had to find them no matter what it took. |
![]() ![]() LP: 70 | 0.5 ![]() Albion LP: 144 Modding LP: 12 | |
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| Kari | Sep 29 2010, 05:37 AM Post #4 |
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Blinded by the magic.
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I have little I want to say about this freeform, apart from it being a very skilled execution of a slightly complex story. To me, this freeform basically creates Albion and Sally. I think you know what I mean. This pins down everything about how these two characters act - this is the numero uno of all manuscripts on Albion. It forms the basis which Albion is built upon, and no one can argue with the basic structure of this character you want to build because there is no basis to which we can compare it with, maybe except for your character creation freeform. In fact, I am actually more interested in what this freeform tells me about you, the writer as opposed to the character. It's not a bad thing, just a very novel sensation to me because it ascertains some aspects of you that I cannot quite confirm. Some parts of it feel like a subconscious reflection of YOUR (YOU the real-life Kirin) thought processes. It doesn't detract from Albion, but it only tells me things about Albion that may not be explicitly stated, things that alter my impressions but will not affect your raw freeform score in any way. And for the record, the reason why I find it harder to grade this than Fang's freeform is because of the distinct roles played by the different genders in the entire story - a very stereotypical concept that you seem to subscribe to, but one that I reject quite passionately. Knowing you and your desire to play up Albion's GARness, I didn't take points off this strong thread of gender imbalance that runs through, even if I didn't hail it like a truth of the world. But I digress, so back to the freeform. You know what to look out for, you know how to score. To be perfectly effective at scoring, however, you need to be slightly more subtle. The first part of the story is a very happy one, for the trainers and their Pokemon, but you like to emphasize that as though you want the grader to be perfectly clear that your Pokemon ARE happy. They are. But I get the feeling that you're trying to say, 'Hey, my Pokemon are obviously happy so give them happiness points even if I requested for pure FFexp.' The only grammatical error that I can spot is that of awkward ordering of clauses. But I'm lazy so I won't talk about it. Your plot is very simple. It involved roleplaying about the adoption and adding in many casual details to beef up your story. Sally's introduction was there to strengthen Albion's character. Everything was made very linear, very clear, and your strong writing gives credit to your score. The actual novelty in the story comes from the environment you create: an Escennia which paralleled the actual Escennia only in form, but featured a very strong personal angle to it. You took Escennia and made it Albion Marius' Escennia. The familiarity, the casual joy, the comfort which the characters feel in this setting - every part of that makes me see Escennia in a way which Albion sees it. Which is very important, because this aspect practically makes or breaks your freeform. Your characterization is extremely strong, extremely solid, but our concepts of characters are very very polarized. I seek novelty within my characters to distinguish them. You happen to strengthen the aspects which we consider to be very stereotypical, to the extent where I actually consider myself sold to the stereotype. Albion is made very consciously GAR, just as Sally plays the weak, reliant sister. You throw in different aspects of the same stereotype, emphasizing that stereotype but making it absolutely clear why it actually works. No, 'stereotype' is a bad word to use. Put it this way. In manga, we see symbols of various character traits like moe, gar, tsundere, whatever. The stronger the character, the more people associate the character to that particular trait and recognize that this character is unique and well-shaped, and definitely deserving of the brand. Photocopiers of the same symbol only degrade this exclusive trait to a stereotype if they lack the skill. In the case of Albion, well, I buy that character very much. Sally too. I see a very strong anime-inspired back-story in this, but your execution makes this novel. What else... right. Why is Albion so overpowered? If Akasha Varlent is capable enough to murder the Marius male line one by one, then why can Albion resist this man's assault? If you're telling me that Albion's brother and father were assassinated unfairly, then it doesn't make sense for Varlent to pop in and go 'Voila! I killed your father by underhanded means and I'm going to kill you!' I understand the righteous revenge motive that you're trying to pull off, but in your attempts to bolster Albion's power you actually diminish Varlent's character. If Varlent remained elusive and mysteriously strong, Albion would then have a greater destiny to fulfill, a greater quest to accomplish. But Varlent popping out now? In the middle of the street? Isn't Varlent being stupid by declaring his intent to kill you? Or is he over-confident? If so, what is the purpose of the mob except to stage this gigantic brawl you wanted? The reason was there. It just wasn't... strong. It wasn't appealing. And if you had made the brawl more compelling then I would be bought by the action. But you almost turned it into an action movie - an action movie with a strong plot, I might add - that featured the punching and kicking more than the reasons why all that happened. You did shock me a little, but without knowing why, who and what it was just 'Wow, Varlent deskinned Damien? Shiiiit.' as opposed to a possible 'Oh my god, that's so horrible. So creepy. Varlent shouldn't be messed with.' And the Smokescreen was *quite* pointless if everyone fought inside. I mean, there's nothing to censor from Sally since she can easily see the other fights? In fact, that actually makes her worry more! Sally's reaction makes a whole lot of sense, but it seems like Albion didn't think through his actions very much. IF the assailants broke through the Smokescreen and your forces resisted their assault, sure. But if you were going to set up a Smokescreen then shouldn't you stay outside and nuke them? If the Smokescreen hurt the Bagon and Swablu and Houndour, then Winston, Catriona and Teddy had no reason to fight in the Smokescreen as opposed to firing shots from a safe distance. ...Okay. That's a lot. My final verdict is: 28.4 , 3 for Winston and 1 for Catriona. You may not swap the happiness for Exp, but you may swap the exp for happiness (if you ever choose to...)0.5 to me.EDIT: I forgot the standard line. PM me if you want to challenge this grading. -Kari Edited by Kari, Sep 29 2010, 05:40 AM.
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[Satari] | APL: 53 | | | | | Spoiler: click to toggle
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| Kirin | Sep 29 2010, 05:48 AM Post #5 |
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Kirin the Bloodedge
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take and take. thank you! enjoy your 0.5
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![]() ![]() LP: 70 | 0.5 ![]() Albion LP: 144 Modding LP: 12 | |
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6:52 PM Jul 10
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| 0.5 




for Winston and 1
to me.
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6:52 PM Jul 10