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Waiting Waiting
Topic Started: Nov 17 2017, 12:59 AM (68 Views)
Joey NOX
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OVER 9000!!!
We begin in your standing room in the middle of nowhere important. The black and white effect on the footage suggests off the bat we're in something just a little different. Throw in the sounds of Tom Petty's "The Waiting" and who knows just what we're in store for. As the camera moves around the room, it goes to the right and there we find PRW Hall of Fame resident Joey NOX! Sporting a black eye and a fat lip, Joey has what appears to be a pack of cue cards held up to his chest. Joey's attire is as basic as his friend Nebraska Jones; basically a Reebok track suit with his sunglasses tucked into the jacket collar. NOX gives the camera a smirk and points to the first cue card.


Hey Y'all!

It's me Joey



NOX flings the cue card away and there is another cue card behind it. NOX shrugs his shoulders before he points to the current cue card, Tom Petty's track continues to blare in the background.


I'm trying to prove a bit of a point so just stick with me, k?


NOX lets the cue card fall to the ground to reveal another one behind it. Joey raises an eyebrow and points to the cue card, Tom Petty's track still playing as NOX moves onto the next card.


"Don't it feel like tonight might never be again
We know better than to try and pretend
Baby no one could have ever told me 'bout this "



As it turns out, the two candidates for our main event in Washington have gone silent.


The message on the card draws a cringe from Joey NOX and a headshake. NOX removes the card and gives the camera a fingerwag, the chorus from Tom Petty's smash hit playing while he milks the moment.


"The waiting is the hardest part
Every day you see one more card
You take it on faith, you take it to the heart
The waiting is the hardest part "



I mean we heard from Ata this week but still! Very quiet! Sad!


Joey grimaces and finger wags the camera some more and it's worth noting that ON that cue card there's a crudely drawn Ata Tatupu stick figure on one side and a drawing of a dog that reads "Big Dog!" underneath it. NOX throws the card away and there's another one under it! NOX looks at the card, cracks a shithead smirk and then shrugs his shoulders.


So since they're quiet, I'll be quiet too!

Except I'll still show up and amuse y'all anyways



NOX gives the camera the trademark kool aid smile and then offers them a little shrug. He throws the card away and holds up the one under it, raising an eyebrow for good measure while Tom Petty blares.


"Baby you're the only one that's ever known how
To make me wanna live like I wanna live now
I said yeah yeah"



Ata and Ace SHOULD be the main event but I'm heading to WA anyways

Because Christmas Carnage NEEDS a main event just in case!



A good look at that card reveals a "Defend Or Vacate MoFo" mention on the side of it. On the other side you have what I'm assuming is Ace Andrews given the golden blonde hair and the Ace drawing is facing off with a dog with curly hair who I assume is Ata Tatupu. At least referee Wild Bill Ash is drawn properly. Behind the trio is a photoshopped picture of Joey NOX as some kind of a Greek statue pasted on. NOX throws the card away and would you be surprised that there's another one under it? 'Cuz there iiiiiiissss.


Worst case scenario?

I gotta step in and win the belt.



NOX shrugs and then with his free hand, he makes the title belt gesture around his waist. Joey drops the card and looks at the camera with a sigh and a sad face accompanying it.


I mean you won't get your advertised main event but you get me

And that's pretty cool am I right?



NOX smiles and shrugs his shoulders casually. The next card comes up quickly as Joey is just moving right along.


And best scenario?

You get your main event AND you get me beating up someone!



NOX wins at the camera as he drops the card. He uses his free hand to give the camera the finger gun and then places his tongue firmly in his cheek.


Who!?

Hmmmm



Joey NOX drops the card and calmly strokes his face making a big dramatic gesture behind it. He notices that the card is actually backwards and so he flips it over to reveal what's on it, smiling as he does so.


I mean it could be anyone!


Maybe Beat Kurosawa?



The card has the flag of Japan on it and an angry looking Beat Kurosawa drawing on it. Joey throws the card away and moves onto the next one.


Terry Funk's not retired yet


NOX has a big smile as she shrugs. Unfortunately it looks like NOX is actually thinking about it as his smile slowly fades into a sad reflective face. Joey sighs, flips the card over and it reveals a note that says "Terry, PLEASE retire!" on it. He throws the card down and the next one is just a mess of names and drawings.


Santa Claus? Owen Drive? El Dandy? SHAQ!?

Who knows what Christmas Carnage will bring?!



Between the crude of Shaq and Owen Drive and the names all over the card, Joey just makes the decision to move on as quickly as possible. He smiles widely and points to the message on the card turning his smile into a serious face and a head nod.


So tune in on December 10th!

See me! See title matches! See Marshall/LeBlanc! Maybe Sean!



NOX pumps his fist and drops the card to reveal he's down to the final one. He looks at the message on it and then raises an eyebrow at the camera, letting the final card speak for itself.


December 10th! Live on PPV! Buy a ticket if you're in Seattle! Call your friends!


Joey drops the card to the floor and dusts his hands off dramatically! As soon as the last card hits the floor, the black and white filter is gone and Tom Petty's song ends. Joey looks around confused and then looks down at the cards on the floor. With the sound of construction somewhere in the distance and his grimace more pronounced, we get to hear Joey for the first time.


NOX: Man where'd my music go?!
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Hot Dawg!

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