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Gundam, Standards, and some TLC
Topic Started: Jul 31 2012, 07:26 PM (325 Views)
RavageDark
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(Cred to Crowe for the Avy)
We at PRW.com tend to get a lot of letters within our inbox from wrestlers underneath the PRW banner. More often than not, we can't help but publish them on site because it helps portray their inner thoughts about certain situations they are involved, much like a promo. And this letter is no different. We e-mailed Onslaught member Takato Kazama, hoping to get some insight about certain Onslaught-related situations. This was his response.

Wow, people actually read this crap?

I kid, I kid. Don't mind me, just wanted to inject a little humor into what is going to be a serious e-mail. No fancy introduction or anything. That's more of Joey's thing.

(Side Note: I'm glad to see Joey up and competing again.)

So let's get into the nitty-gritty.

First off, let's address the Suzuki Gundam. It's been a long while since Summer Carnival, and they still haven't accepted Onslaught's challenge. You see, Suzuki decided to send the two weakest wrestlers in his camp to face us: a WWECW reject and a wrestler whose wrestling name should be Sofa King Irrelevant. That in and of itself is bad enough, but he did this after he talked a big one about what he was going to do to us.

Suzuki, if you're reading this - and considering all the time you spent in front of the keyboard as of lately, I have a feeling you are - do us all a favor and do one of the following: either back away from your keyboard and look around your home for the balls you misplaced since before Summer Carnival and come face Slaughter and I like the man you're supposed to be, or just keep our names out of your mouth. I would prefer you go with option one.

Next topic: Devin Rok, the so called Paragon of Excellence and all that good stuff. You know, had you asked me a few months ago how I felt about Devin... I would of told you that he seems to be an okay guy. We weren't friends or anything like, but he seemed to be a man about his standards. Which begs the question: Why the hell is he teamed up with someone like Terry?

You see, I remembered last year when Devin was feuding with Chaos The Clown and Sean Aries because of their drug use. You know what? Fine. I don't like drugs either. I can somewhat see where he is coming from even though he didn't have to be such jerk about it. But then he decides to align himself with Terry Bukowski, who probably would have ended Ata's career, if not her life, if Devin hadn't intervened. Now, I get it: You guys were teamed up before that even happened. But yet, after that, you still stuck with him. And despite the fact he deserved every chair shot I used to crush his cranium, you still swooped in and decided to play the "hero".

Well kids, that's the lesson for today. Druggies: Baaaaaad. People who blindside and beat down a woman due to some personal issues that had nothing to do with her: Gooooooood.

All snarking aside, Devin pretty much screwed himself. He should have walked away and preserve any face he had left after deciding to take Terry underneath his wing. But no - that would have been too smart. Since he wants to involve himself in this, then it's only right that I'll leave him buried right next to Terry. I could see your tombstone now.

Devin Rok: The Paragon of Hypocrisy and Warped Standards. Someone should call the merchandising department and make a t-shirt with that moniker on it.

Last, but not least - Clash Of The Titans. I only got two things to say about that one. First of all, Onslaught is going to kill XC. They think they had a trap set up for us with the whole TLC gimmick. They think they got us right where they want him. Problem is, we've been sitting out of the Tag Team Championship hunt for a month now, waiting patiently for an opportunity to reveal itself. And wouldn't you know it: No count outs. No disqualifications. No rope breaks. Nothing to stop us from destroying them limb by limb. Simply put, we're not trapped in there with them. They are trapped in there with us.

This leads me to point number two.

Sherri, consider this your first and final warning. I know that since the match is No DQ, there is no regulation that could stop you from interfering. But... don't. Why? Well, I usually don't like to attack a woman outside of an official match. And, considering that Ata has been wanting to rip your lips off since she heard that you kissed Slaughter, you may not even be in any position for this warning to apply after the Last Woman Standing Match. However, just in case you are, if you do anything, and I do mean anything, that interferes with our match, I will personally kick you in your mouth so hard, the next time you are on your knees, you won't need the command "No Teeth".

tl;dr: Screw The Suzuki Gundam, Screw Devin and Terry, and Screw Xclusiv Canary.
Posted Image

Patrick Slaughter
-1x PRW Undisputed Heavyweight Champion of The World
-3x PRW Tag Team Champion (w/ Takato Kazama)
-10x PRW Cyanide Champion
-2011 PRW Trios Tournament Champion (w/ Kevin Murphy and Canary Kid, Inaugural)

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Takato Kazama
-2x PRW X-Division Champion
-3x PRW Tag Team Champion (w/ Patrick Slaughter)
-5x PRW Cyanide Champion

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Ata Tatupu
-2x PRW Undisputed Heavyweight Champion of The World (Current)
-1x PRW X-Division Champion
-3x PRW Internet Champion
-4x PRW Cyanide Champion
-1x WCW Double D Champion
-2014 Lioness Cup Booking.com Block Winner

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