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A couple ownage jokes; ...and a normal one
Topic Started: Nov 27 2006, 08:59 PM (251 Views)
Jake Burkin
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PRW's Innovator of Submission
Sex in the Dark

There was this couple that had been married for 20 years. Every time they made love the husband always insisted on shutting off the light. Well, after 20 years the wife felt this was ridiculous. She figured she would break him out of this crazy habit. So one night, while they were in the middle of a wild, screaming, romantic session, she turned on the lights. She looked down... and saw her husband was holding a battery-operated pleasure device... a vibrator! Soft, wonderful and larger than a real one. She went completely ballistic. "You impotent bastard," She screamed at him, "how could you be lying to me all of these years? You better explain yourself!" The husband looks her straight in the eyes and says calmly: "I'll explain the toy . . . you explain the kids."

-------------------------------------------

The Cabbie and the Nun

A cabbie picks up a nun. She gets into the cab, and notices that the VERY
handsome cab driver won't stop staring at her. She asks him why he is staring.

He replies: "I have a question to ask you but I don't want to offend you."

She answers, " My son, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as I am and have been a nun as long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear just about everything. I'm sure that there's nothing you could say or ask that I would find offensive."

“Well, I've always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me."

She responds, "Well, let's see what we can do about that: #1, you have to be single and #2, you must be Catholic."

The cab driver is very excited and says, "Yes, I'm single and Catholic!"

"OK" the nun says. "Pull into the next alley."

The nun fulfills his fantasy with a kiss that would make a hooker blush. But
when they get back on the road, the cab driver starts crying.

"My dear child," said the nun, why are! You crying?" "Forgive me but I've sinned. I lied and I must confess, I'm married and I'm Jewish."

The nun says, "That's OK. My name is Kevin and I'm going to a Halloween party."

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A Prostitutes' tax return

A woman walks into an accountant's office and tells him that she needs to file her taxes. The accountant says, "Before we begin, I'll need to ask you a few
questions." He gets her name, address, social security number, etc. and then asks, "what is your occupation?"

"I'm a whore," she says.

The accountant is somewhat taken back and says, "No, No, No, that won't work. That is too gross. Let's try to rephrase that"

The woman says, "OK, I'm a high-end call girl".

"No, that is still too crude. Try again."

They both think for a minute; then the woman says, "I'm an elite chicken farmer."

The accountant asks, "What does chicken farming have to do with being a whore?"

"Well, I raised over a thousand little peckers last year."

"Good enough."
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Sniper
Mar 4 2007, 04:29 PM
I like to think I learn something from every thread I visit.  This thread has taught me that Paint can have an abortion.


Aries
May 31 2010 12:08 PM
CLUE: PRW EDITION; IT WAS RUSS, WITH THE VOLKSWAGON, IN THE PARKING LOT
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