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| CAP'N CRUNCH WANTS YOU!; An RP from the twisted mind of Rixter | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Jun 21 2006, 03:20 PM (270 Views) | |
| Duo Himura | Jun 21 2006, 03:20 PM Post #1 |
The Betrayer of the People and a Tyranical Capitalist Pig-Dog
  ![]](http://z6.ifrm.com/static/1/pip_r.png)
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Okay, so somehow Rixter got the idea to make a "Cereal Rock Opera." But then we realized how stupid that was. It had to be a MUSICAL! And so we wrote the first three scenes. And then we thought "Man, this would make an AWESOME RP!" So, here we are. The short version is that Chip and Sonny are on Cap'n Crunch's naval vessel, the Guppy, which has recently been hijacked and turned into a pirate ship (read the full story at the bottom of this post). Chip and Sonny will be played by myself and Rixter, respectively, and you guys can play ANY cereal mascot you want! This site has every obscure cereal mascot ever http://www.lavasurfer.com/cereal-guide.html; we reference it frequently, and it's advised that you do as well. We -might- allow OCs, but only if we absolutely must, as there are like, 3 female cereal mascots to make any sort of appearance. We'd probably let someone play Toucan Sam's forgotten daughter or something, but she has to have an overly angsty past about it, darn it! Other characters whose roles have been defined but are not taken are: Lucky, the head of the SWAT team, and essentially the Smoker-character. Wendell, the baker from Cinnamon Toast Crunch, who is a Judge, but could feasibly also head out in search of Chip with Lucky, and Tony the Tiger, the bailiff. Buzz was Chip's lawyer, but he switched sides after Lucky bribed him with five magically delicious gold doubloons, and now could potentially be played on either side. Cornelius the Corn Flakes Rooster and the Rabbit from Trix are the lawyer-client team who originally sued Chip, they'd probably be against him, but they could join if they had a valid reason. CinnaMon and the BAD APPLE from Applejacks, though they don't appear in the original script, should have a Dark/Krad (of D.N.Angel) like relationship, where they're fated to fight each other despite being former friends or something (not actually that similar to Dark and Krad, but...) Count Chocula, Booberry, and Frankenberry run a narcotics ring, they probably can't be introduced until the crew reaches land again. Toucan Sam doesn't have a role, but since he's at sea forcing his kids to row him in search of new berry tastes, he fits in pretty well. Applications can be simple, but all characters must be twisted in some way, preferably making fun of how they act in the commercials taken out of context. So here is the original script, that sets up the RP: ((Camera pans over various papers)) Voice: So, you see, ladies and gentlemen of the jury- Voice 2: We’re all guys… Voice 3: Pop! No! Voice: This incriminating evidence proves with absolute certainty the guilt of the defendant. My client has provided a valuable service to the industry for years, and now this upstart feels the need to copy and exploit my client’s noble work. ((Camera starts at floor height and pans upward, showing person in a suit. Before the face is shown… camera quickly shifts to face of WENDELL the Baker wearing a powdered wig and holding a gavel)) WENDELL: Very good, Mr. R. Your closing statement, Mr. B? ((Camera switches to a table with CHIP the Wolf sitting behind it and BUZZ the Bee fluttering in front of it)) BUZZ: Your Honor, my opponent is nothing more than a chicken in a business suit! ((Camera shifts to CORNELIUS the Rooster)) CORNELIUS: Hey, I’m a ROOSTER! ((Camera shifts back to WENDELL)) WENDELL: The defense attorney will refrain from insulting his opponent. ((Camera to BUZZ)) BUZZ: It was merely an observation, your Honor. ((WENDELL)) WENDELL: Is there anything else? ((BUZZ)) BUZZ: Uh… Is it too late to change our plea? CHIP: WHAT? ((WENDELL)) WENDELL: Yes. The jury is about to come to a verdict on the case between Chip the Wolf, and The Rabbit… the rabbit. ((Camera splits vertically showing close-ups of the faces of CHIP and THE RABBIT. Logo shows between them. A few seconds later, camera fades to black. The words “Much deliberation later” appear on the screen)) ((WENDELL)) WENDELL: Has the jury reached a verdict? ((Camera shifts to bottom of Jury Stand, where It rises upwards. Voices still speak)) Voice: Well, sir, after much deliberation, we have come to this conclusion… ((Camera reaches top of stand, and zooms out quickly to reveal SNAP, CRACKLE, and POP)) SNAP, CRACKLE & POP: Snap! Crackle! Pop! He’s guilty~! ((BUZZ)) BUZZ: ((Gasp)) The jig is up, CHIP! ((pulls out two honey wands connected into nunchaku)) I can’t hold em off for long! Run, Chip, run! ((CHIP)) CHIP: I’ll never forget youuuuuu!!!! ((runs away)) ((WENDELL)) WENDELL: Bailiff! ((Camera switches to TONY the Tiger)) TONY: ((Jumps from behind the judge stand/pedestal and attacks BUZZ)) ((Shot of CHIP running out of door)) ((Shot of BUZZ trying to defend himself with honey nanchaku)) ((Shot of city streets. CHIP walks through them)) ((Title appears on screen)) Murder on Milk St. (Working Title) CHIP: Ever since that day, when that silly rabbit said he was suing for plagiarism… everything changed. And now… ((Renegade starts playing. Starts skipping through streets. Slowly, children from cereal commercials come out and act as his back-up dancers behind him (waving arms, spinning, etc))) The jig is up, the news is out They finally found me The renegade who had it made Retrieved for a bounty Never more to go astray This'll be the end today Of the wanted man Oh Mama, I've been years on the lam and had a high price on my head Lawman said 'Get him dead or alive' and it's for sure he'll see me dead Dear Mama I can hear you cryin', you're so scared and all alone Hangman is comin' down from the gallows and I don't have very long The jig is up, the news is out They finally found me The renegade who had it made Retrieved for a bounty Never more to go astray The judge'll have revenge today On the wanted man Oh Mama, I'm in fear for my life from the long arm of the law Law man has put an end to my running and I'm so far from my home The jig is up, the news is out They finally found me The renegade who had it made Retrieved for a bounty Never more to go astray This'll be the end today Of the wanted man ((As the song finishes, CHIP strikes a Michael Jackson-esque pose)) ((QUISP the alien dude comes walking down the street, humming “Live like you were dying”)) ((Focus on KID from Cookie Crisp commercial)) KID: Hey, now that you’re a felon, you’re cool enough to have some Cookie Crisp! Here! ((throws to CHIP)) CHIP: ((Reaches out to grab it, misses)) JUST MISSED THAT COOKIE CRIIIIISP! ((Box hits QUISP in the head, who collapses to the ground)) ((KID)) KID: Oh my God, you killed Quisp! Even though he’s been abandoned by society and it’s in no way your fault, the American Legal System will blame YOU for it! ((CHIP)) CHIP: But it was just a box of cereal! ((Zooms in on CHIP’s face)) KID: Yeah, the special prize was a rusty, 6-inch long dagger! CHIP: I’ve gotta have a talk with the General Mills… Oh, and my lawyer. BUUUUUZZZZ!!! I gotta get outta here! Before I’m caught! I’m already on the lam! ((Background goes black. The camera zooms on a side view of CHIP’s head. The children are in the background, now in suits and sunglasses. CHIP sings most of the song “Easier to Run,” by Linkin Park, with the children singing the rapping parts (in parentheses))) It's easier to run Replacing this pain with something numb It's so much easier to go Than face all this pain here all alone Something has been taken from deep inside of me The secret I've kept locked away no one can ever see Wounds so deep they never show they never go away Like moving pictures in my head for years and years they've played (If I could change I would take back the pain I would) (Retrace every wrong move that I made I would) (If I could stand up and take the blame I would) (If I could take all the shame to the grave I would) (If I could change I would take back the pain I would) (Retrace every wrong move that I made I would) (If I could stand up and take the blame I would) (I would take all my shame to the grave) It's easier to run Replacing this pain with something numb It's so much easier to go Than face all this pain here all alone Sometimes I remember the darkness of my past Bringing back these memories I wish I didn't have Sometimes I think of letting go and never looking back And never moving forward so there'd never be a past (If I could change I would take back the pain I would) (Retrace every wrong move that I made I would) (If I could stand up and take the blame I would) (If I could take all the shame to the grave I would) (If I could change I would take back the pain I would) (Retrace every wrong move that I made I would) (If I could stand up and take the blame I would) (I would take all my shame to the grave) Just washing it aside All of the helplessness inside Pretending I don't feel misplaced It's so much simpler than change It's easier to run Replacing this pain with something numb It's so much easier to go Than face all this pain here all alone It's easier to run (If I could change I would take back the pain I would) (Retrace every wrong move that I made) It's easier to go (If I could change I would take back the pain I would) (Retrace every wrong move that I made I would) (If I could stand up and take the blame I would) (I would take all my shame to the grave) ((Camera shows a shot from the ground, that shows CHIP running away)) END OF SCENE 1 ((Camera shows LUCKY the Leprechaun and BUZZ in a darkened room with a bare light bulb illuminating the table, on which is placed a bowl of honey)) LUCKY: Alrighty, there, Mr. Buzz, if’n ye tell me where yer friend Mr. Chip got to, all ‘o these honey be yers for the takin’. BUZZ: No! Only the finest honey can be used for my Honey Nut Cheerios! This is second rate at best. I need grade A honey! LUCKY: Grrr… ((turns head)) Lass, get me some grade A honey! ((leans toward BUZZ)) I’ll get ye info outta ye if’n ye likes it or not! BUZZ: I uphold the integrity of my clients! LUCKY: I’ll be givin’ ye five magically delicious gold doubloons. BUZZ: ((Takes out picture of CHIP)) I’m sorry, son, I gave it my best. ((Scene switches to CHIP walking through an alley)) ((Weird “cooo” sound)) CHIP: What’s that? ((Sound continues, appears to be coming from a trash can, he kicks it)) Voice: OW! I thought my precious was in here… ((crawls out into shadows. Camera slowly reveals SONNY the Cuckoo bird)) SONNY: ((in slurred speech)) What do you want? Get off my lawn! CHIP: But this is an alleyway. SONNY: This is just another way the MAN is trying to bring me down! CHIP: What is that smell? SONNY: That’d be the scent of urine. It happens to someone of my occupation. CHIP: And that’s… sitting in a trashcan? SONNY: Sonny, I be a hobo, a wanderin’ nomad in search of my… my Cocoa Puffs. I’m addicted to them Cocoa Puffs… ya might even say I’m… cuckoo for em. CHIP: So you’re… Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs? SONNY: ((Goes into spasms)) CUCKOO FOR COCOA PUFFS! CUCKOO FOR COCOA PUFFS! CHIP: Stop it, you’re getting hysterical! SONNY: CUCKOO FOR COCOA PUFFS! CUCKOO FOR COCOA PUFFS! CHIP: … ((walks away)) ((CHIP is walking through another alleyway; a voice yells after him)) SONNY: Hey, man! I thought ya left me back ther! CHIP: ((keeps walking)) I did. You followed me. SONNY: ((runs alongside CHIP)) So where’re ya headin? CHIP: I’m on the lam. They’re after me for one crime I did commit and one I didn’t. You’d think they’d cancel each other out, but no such luck. SONNY: Wellwhy doncha join up wit me? I’m was headin out too. CHIP: No thanks. SONNY: Ya got any experience bein’ a hobo boy? They don’t let anybuddy on those tracks, ya know. Gotta have qualifimacations. You gotta smella yur own body functuns! Ya gotta hava LAZY EYE! Ya gotta havtha dazed look of somun wit nowhere lefta go, and fewta no reedemin qualities! Can ya do that, Son? CHIP: Well, I am a wolf… SONNY: NO YA DON’T! I’ma gonna teech ya everytin I know, and one day we’ll finda those Cocoa Puff TOGETHA in the legendary land of Hobopolis! CHIP: I’m fine, thank you. SONNY: They sed twas crazy ta make en ootopia outta society’s outcasts! Butwee didit anyway! Ya knaw why, Son? CHIP: Please stop calling me “Son-“ SONNY: Because’a dreem! A dreem ova place where hobos cud be judged by tha degree oftheir stentch, not by their contributions to society! ((Camera follows behind CHIP and SONNY, who walk towards the urban sunset. SONNY starts to sing:)) SONNY: On the road again Just can't wait to get on the road again The life I love is makin' music with my friends And I can't wait to get on the road again On the road again Goin' places that I've never been Seein' things that I may never see again, And I can't wait to get on the road again. On the road again Like a band of gypsies we go down the highway We're the best of friends Insisting that the world be turnin' our way And our way Is on the road again Just can't wait to get on the road again The life I love is makin' music with my friends And I can't wait to get on the road again On the road again Like a band of gypsies we go down the highway We're the best of friends Insisting that the world be turnin' our way And our way Is on the road again Just can't wait to get on the road again The life I love is makin' music with my friends And I can't wait to get on the road again And I can't wait to get on the road again CHIP: WILL YOU SHUT UP?! SONNY: Sorry, Son. ((Screen fades to black)) CHIP: WHY DOES EVERYONE THINK I’M THEIR SON?! END OF SCENE 2 ((Screen fades in to a panning shot across a wharf, waves, ambience, etc.)) ((Screen starts at the bottom of the ship “The Guppy,” and pans up to reveal CAP’N CRUNCH)) CAP’N CRUNCH: Alright, then, men, as officers of the Royal Navy of America, we have been charged by General Mills to find and capture Chip the Wolf, convicted murderer and felon. SEADOG: Doesn’t there need to be a trial for him to be convicted? And I thought the kid did that… CAP’N CRUNCH: Well, we can’t charge a kid with murder! We’d normally charge his parents but Chip was more readily available. Now! Transform and roll out, men! EVERYONE: SIR! ((Scene switches to CHIP and SONNY sneaking through the wharf)) CHIP: There are guards everywhere… how am I ever going to stow away on one of these ships? SONNY: Son, it’s time I taught ya the ancieeent hobo art of Transaformation, as passeda from Woooodie Gooothree, the most famousest hobo of em all! CHIP: That sounds painful… ((ALFIE walks by)) SONNY: Watchy these, Son. Henge no Jutsu! ((tackles ALFIE and steals his clothes)) Now itsa yurs turn, Son. ((Scene shows CHIP and SONNY disguised as sailors walking on to the Guppy)) CHIP: Admiral Crunch, Sir, we request to join your fleet of merry men. CAP’N CRUNCH: Flattery gets you nowhere on my ship, Son. That’s CAP’N Crunch to you. Now, if you want to join, I have to know if you have the proper qualifimacations. SONNY: I doo, Comrade Crunch! CAP’N CRUNCH: Well, then, let me tell educate you landlubbers as to what this life is all about: ((“In the Navy” starts playing, with the SAILORS acting as backup dancers/singers to CAP’N CRUNCH’s singing, SONNY joins in halfway through and he and CAP’N CRUNCH do the Can-can)) Where can you find pleasure Search the world for treasure Learn science technology Where can you begin to make your dreams all come true On the land or on the sea Where can you learn to fly Play in sports and skin dive Study oceanography Sign off for the big band Or sit in the grandstand When your team and others meet In the navy Yes, you can sail the seven seas In the navy Yes, you can put your mind at ease In the navy Come on now, people, make a stand In the navy, in the navy Can't you see we need a hand In the navy Come on, protect the motherland In the navy Come on and join your fellow man In the navy Come on people, and make a stand In the navy, in the navy, in the navy (in the navy) They want you, they want you They want you as a new recruit If you like adventure Don't you wait to enter The recruiting office fast Don't you hesitate There is no need to wait They're signing up new seamen fast Maybe you are too young To join up today Bout don't you worry 'bout a thing For I'm sure there will be Always a good navy Protecting the land and sea In the navy Yes, you can sail the seven seas In the navy Yes, you can put your mind at ease In the navy Come on now, people, make a stand In the navy, in the navy Can't you see we need a hand In the navy Come on, protect the motherland In the navy Come on and join your fellow man In the navy Come on people, and make a stand In the navy, in the navy, in the navy (in the navy) They want you, they want you They want you as a new recruit Who me? They want you, they want you They want you as a new recruit CHIP: But, but but I'm afraid of water. Hey, hey look Man, I get seasick even watchin' it on TV! They want you, they want you in the navy CHIP: Oh my goodness. What am I gonna do in a submarine? They want you, they want you in the navy In the navy Yes, you can sail the seven seas In the navy Yes, you can put your mind at ease In the navy Come on now, people, make a stand In the navy, in the navy Can't you see we need a hand In the navy Come on, protect the motherland In the navy Come on and join your fellow man In the navy Come on people, and make a stand In the navy, in the navy, in the navy (in the navy) SONNY: Yes, Comrade Crunch, I weeell join your navaaaal vessal! CHIP: I… may as well… CAP’N CRUNCH: Very well, men! We’re hunting down Chip, the infamous murderers of Comrade Quisp! SONNY: Someone killed Quisp? Why Iff I’ma ever see that there Chip fella, I’ll teach him what for, I say, I say! CHIP: Sonny! How can you say that, I’m Chip! Oh…. Crud… SONNY: Oh… whoops. That transaformation stuff ees reely good. CAP’N CRUNCH: Seadog! GET THEM! CHIP: Uh… THIS IS A HIJACKING! SEADOG: HIJACKERS! They’ve got biochemical weapons, everyone run for you life! CHIP: No, that’s just Sonny. But uh… this is now… a… a PIRATE SHIP! Yeah! ((Guys in suits appear)) GUY IN SUIT: Excuse me, sir, if you’re going to hijack this vessel and turn it into a pirate ship, we’re gonna need to see your identification. And your luggage. SONNY: Here ya go, ya outstanding citizen! ((hands RAT to GUYS IN SUITS)) CHIP: Here ((hands luggage)) GUY IN SUIT: ((inspects luggage)) No biochemical weapons here. You’re clean. But as for YOU ((glares at SONNY)) SONNY: ATTACK! RAT: ((Bites GUY IN SUIT)) CHIP: Onto the ship! ((The Guppy sets sail)) CAP’N CRUNCH: That was close, men. CHIP: WHAT’RE YOU DOING HERE?!, CAP’N CRUNCH: Well, see, I always wanted to be a pirate; sailing the seven seas with a group of salty sea dogs (no offense, Sea Dog) SEADOG: None taken. CAP’N CRUNCH: Then we could form a ragtag crew, and we be all like “Yeah, we’re a crew. And we’re rag tag.” ((puts on Straw Hat)) Can I still be the captain please? ((gets on hands and knees in front of CHIP and SONNY)) SONNY: Do yas gots any refererrences? CHIP: Uh… well, your knowledge of the sea will come in handy. I guess you can stay… CAP’N CRUNCH: There’s only one thing to do now: Paint our flag black, and SING! ((A Pirates Life for Me starts playing; entire cast goes into musical song-and-dance number, every named character is in foreground)) Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me. We pillage plunder, we rifle and loot. Drink up me 'earties, yo ho. We kidnap and ravage and don't give a hoot. Drink up me 'earties, yo ho. Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me. We extort and pilfer, we filch and sack. Drink up me 'earties, yo ho. Maraud and embezzle and even highjack. Drink up me 'earties, yo ho. Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me. We kindle and char and in flame and ignite. Drink up me 'earties, yo ho. We burn up the city, we're really a fright. Drink up me 'earties, yo ho. We're rascals and scoundrels, we're villians and knaves. Drink up me 'earties, yo ho. We're devils and black sheep, we're really bad eggs. Drink up me 'earties, yo ho. We're beggars and blighters and ne'er do-well cads, Drink up me 'earties, yo ho. Aye, but we're loved by our mommies and dads, Drink up me 'earties, yo ho. Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me. ((Ship sails into the sunset. Screen fades out)) SEADOG: Set sail for ONE PIECE! CAP’N CRUNCH: I smell a demotion, Sergeant. SEADOG: D’oh. END OF SCENE THREE Remember, this RP is a MUSICAL. If you have the lyrics to a song that you think fits the scene, feel free to include it in your post. The story follows around the CEREAL CRIMINALS!!!!111 as Chip goes on the lam, Sonny finds his Cocoa Puffs, Cap'n Crunch lives out his dream, etc. If we have people playing characters on the other side, then we split the story between them... we'll figure out how exactly when we get to that point, maybe we'll make two threads that overlapp when the crews meet or something... Also, we'd appreciate this being kept as literate as possible. Spellcheck=good. If you hold up the RP for no reason for more than a week or two your character will be assimilated by us and become even more twisted than when you had him/her (for all 3 of the female characters, 2 of which are grannies). Let the madness begin! Edit note: Since I'm going on vacation in a couple of days, Rixter or Digi will take over Chip for me, whichever of them wants to. On the off-chance that I get to an Internet Cafe and Chip has the opportunity to do something, I'll try to post then. Edit edit note: Also, please post in normal paragraph format, script format would make it confusing and we only used that so it'd feel like a screenplay in hopes that some poor sap would agree to animate it for us. Like Tim Burton. Edit^3 note: If you're uncertain about how many people will recognize a song, then post a link to somewhere that they can listen to at least part of it to get an idea. You can find any of ours on YouTube, In the Navy was on Google Video too. |
 Aku Soku Zan.  Can I get a "Sieg Zeon"? Cibo canem domare potes... Pecunia hominem domare potes... Sed nemo et nihil Mibuis Lupos movere potest! | |
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| Maple | Jun 21 2006, 10:27 PM Post #2 |
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1st Mate
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So, we technically chose any CEREAL CRIMINALS!!!111 we want? ... I think I'd be Trix Rabbit. Or Toucan Sam. ... Name: The Trix Rabbit Age: N/A Gender: Male? Goal in Life: Kill all the kids that stole his Trix...;-; Does that work? If not... Name: Toucan Sam Age: N/A Gender: Male Goal in Life: Find the greatest berry taste...THE GRAND BERRY (LOL ONE PIECE REFERENCE) EDIT: Oh, can we change the lyrics for some songs? Like, since Toucan Sam wants to find The Grand Berry, I could use the dub rap part: "Here's how the story goes, we find out about a treasure in the Grand Line," And change it into: "Here's how the story goes, we find out about a treasure called the Grand Berry"? |
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| Rixter | Jun 22 2006, 12:17 AM Post #3 |
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Unregistered
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Curse you Duo; calling my genius mind "twisted!" *shakes fist in air*
Yes. Any one. The site Duo mentioned is great for finding obscure ones (and the obscure ones are the easiest to make fun of).
Song parodying is fine. Hm, either one is fine, but Toucan Sam will probably have a bigger part than The Rabbit, so you might want to decide based off that. Characters due to appear in the first arc: The crew of the Guppy (Chip, Sonny, Cap'n Crunch, Seadog) Toucan Sam Sam's unisex nephews(?) Count Chocula, Booberry, and Frankenberry The SWAT team (comprised of Lucky, the Honeycomb Cravers, and possibly Buzz) When you apply, you decide whether to join the crew of The Guppy with Chip and the rest, or as part of the SWAT Team with Lucky. I suppose you could start off neutral (for the rough plot idea that Duo and I have for the first arc, Sam will have to be), but it would probably be easier on everyone to just pick a side from the beginning. And maybe, I don't know... we -may- accept fictional Cereal Mascots. If anyone applied as Powdered Toast Man, for instance, we might consider it. EDIT: Am I the only one who finds the Google ads for this thread to be very entertaining? |
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| Rixter | Jun 25 2006, 03:52 PM Post #4 |
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Unregistered
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Double post of DEATH!!! Duo and I are going to go to our rooms and cry now, okay? 100 views and NOBODY is interested? Did you read our opus in the first post? Duo WOULD be sobbing his eyes out, but by now he's probably too busy telling dirty jokes to the guards in front of the Palace in England to notice. *breaks down crying* |
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| Digitaldreamer | Jun 25 2006, 04:06 PM Post #5 |
Friendly Neighborhood GM
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Sorry Rixter....the first post is amusing, but this role-play doesn't seem like something I'd really want to play...or be good at, for that matter, I'm pretty terrible at humor. ^^;; Not only that but I'm pretty busy as is....you guys might be better off just writing out the adventures of the cereal criminals yourselves... |
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~*Forum Queen*~ ZoLu is <3!  
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| Maple | Jun 26 2006, 07:05 PM Post #6 |
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1st Mate
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I am up to it... O_o;; I'll be Sam... *yawns* |
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4:43 PM Jul 13