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NEW World Heavyweight Champion: Romeo Stylez
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After 219 shows and 1184 matches featuring 326 different superstars, NEWera has shut its doors. Thank you all.

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Horse Face Ginger
Topic Started: Jan 3 2012, 04:43 PM (233 Views)
Deleted User
Deleted User

Okay, so by this point you all know I hate wrestling. I despise it to its core. I hate the politics that are involved, I hate putting douche bags over that don’t deserve it, and yet here I am, in a fucking dark match for my debut with NEW!?!? Are you kidding me? I’ve wrestled around the world, I’ve been in countless promotions, won countless titles, I’ve been on TV shows, I’ve even got my own beauty product line, yet I’m in a dark match!?

Standing in the back of the arena looking at the dry erase board I can’t believe my eyes. Written in big bold letters with black dry erase ink on the white backdrop are the names:

”Beautiful” Bobby Dean vs. “The General” Tom Jackson

“What is this shit?” I demand the first nameless backstage hand, who looks at me with fear in her eyes as I grab her by the upper arm and pull her to me.

“Wh. Wha. What?” she stammers as I turn my head to the board once more.

“Who books this shit?” I demand again, not waiting for a response I steamroll right on through to the awaiting rant. “I mean, I’ve not heard of half of these bastards on this lineup, yet “Beautiful” Bobby Dean is not only curtain jerking, but doing it in a fucking dark match!? “Beautiful” Bobby Dean is very displeased!”

“I. I. I’m sor. Sorry.” She stammers once more as I release my grip on her arm and shove her away while I spin around in dramatic fashion and walk away, making my way towards my designated locker room.

Every step of the way I’m questioning the decision of signing with this promotion. I don’t see anyone that stands out, I don’t see anyone that can really bring it, yet here I am, and I can’t help but ask myself, for what? Money? Fame? Titles? Women? This place looks like any other place I’ve been, just another shit hole, a dime a dozen.

Walking down the hall, my mind slowly brings me back to weeks earlier when I found myself sitting at my local hole in the wall dive bar, nursing a bottle of Jack Daniels in one hands, and a liter of Coke in the other. Instead of mixing them in a glass, I’d simply pour some coke in my mouth, hold it in, then pour some Jack in my mouth, swishing it around before swallowing. Needless to say I’m drunk off my ass at this point.

Sitting next to me is my agent, Jeremiah Sloan, he’s got a stack of papers in front of him as he’s selling me on this promotion, New Era Wrestling. I’m not paying any attention, as my eyes were fixated in the reflected mirror behind the bar, eyeing up one of the females behind me across the bar. It might have been the alcohol but this woman was gorgeous! With flaming red hair, a bright green spaghetti strap shirt, and a face that’d make Jennifer Love Hewitt cream her panties. I was in love!

“Listen Bobby, a lot of people are asking for you to join NEW. They’ve expressed an interest in bringing you on board and the brass over at CWC said you and OutKast can only challenge for the titles if you’re in a CWC affiliated organization. Only problem is, not many of the organizations affiliated with the CWC want “Beautiful” Bobby Dean…” Sloan admonishes, which I must admit, goes in one ear and out the other.

“Yeah, titles, right.” I say, paraphrasing what I heard. “Sign me up, now tell me Jay, you see the knock out in the green?”

Jay, with no tact whatsoever, turns in his chair and searches out the woman in question. His face scrunches up before he immediately turns back around. “Oh man, I think I vomited a little in my mouth…”

“I know, gorgeous huh!?” I ask, rhetorically of course. “I think I’m going to fuck her tonight.”

Jeremiah looks at me, like he wants to say something but bites his tongue and simply smirks at me like he’s on the verge of busting out laughing. “You know, you two would look good together B. In fact I’ll be willing to go over and lay the ground work for ya, all you gotta do is sign this here contract for me.”

“Really?” I ask astonished. I mean, I have to admit, I hate picking up women. It’s so much easier to walk up and flop out my dick and say “Wanna go?” than have to sweet talk ‘em and wine and dine ‘em. But Jay? Jay is a master at picking up chicks, so needless to say I snatch the papers from him and quickly sign my name on every dotted line I see, whether my name belongs there or not.

With signed contract in hand Jeremiah puts it in his briefcase before getting up off of his stool and making his way over to the red in the green.

An hour or three later we’re laying in bed, this red head naked with freckles from head to toe, her green shirt joining my pants, swinging from the ceiling fan above the bed. Huffing and puffing I smile with admiration at my skill, looking over at this goddess, I actually do throw up a little…

Posted Image

This beast of a woman looks over at me and flashes me, what she considers to be, a radiant smile. “Hi lover.” She says in what she considers a sultry voice, which sounds more like she’s smoked two packs too many.

I quickly scramble out of the bed and backpedal to the bathroom, slamming and locking the door immediately after I cross the thresh hold. Using the counter, I manage to climb up to my feet, staring at my reflection in the mirror I’m a bit disgusted with myself. Not because I fucked this horse face ginger, but because I signed a contract with a promotion I know absolutely nothing about, TO fuck this horse face ginger!

“Jay, I’m going to kill you!” I swear before turning on the water, scalding hot, to wash away the residue of our coupling.

“Bobby!” A voice calls out, breaking my walk down memory lane and bringing me back to the present. Looking up I see another nameless backstage employee holding a clipboard. “You’re on in five.”

Looking down I see that I’m in my gear and ready to go, even if I don’t remember ever changing. With a sigh, I get to my feet and make my way to the door, with the thought of “Let’s get this over with,” running through my head.
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